Consequences
by triplehhholic
Summary: He loved her.  She loved him.  Only problem is she married someone else.  What will the consequences be if they ever choose to be together?  AU HHH/Steph
1. Chapter 1

Consequences

Chapter 1

Paul felt a wave of nausea wash over him. He knew his nerves were completely shot standing here waiting for her. As he quickly glanced at his watch, he bit down his lip realising that Stephanie was almost twenty minutes late. His stomach churned and he spun round to anxiously look towards the entrance to the church. He felt Shawn pat him reassuringly on the shoulder.

"Relax, Paul. It's fashionable for the bride to be late you know."

Paul could only respond with a nod and a smile as he turned back round to face the front of the altar. He was nervous as hell and it was no wonder. His whole life as he knew it was about to change. Well, if Stephanie actually decided to show up that was. He immediately felt himself start to panic. What if she had changed her mind at the last minute? Maybe she had decided that this wasn't what she wanted after all. He tried to think back to their last conversation. It had been only this morning he had spoken to her and they hadn't actually discussed the wedding at all. In fact it had been the furthest thing from their minds as they had whispered their love for one another as the sun rose sharing their memories of the night they had just spent together. It had been nothing short of incredible and was a night he knew he would never forget.

Paul's thoughts were interrupted by Shawn nudging him. As he looked round to face him, he saw him grinning at him.

"It's time buddy. She's here."

Paul felt his heart start to pound as he heard the organ strike up and begin to play. He nervously played with the cuffs of his tuxedo jacket and took a deep breath letting it out slowly in an attempt to calm his nerves. As he turned round, he saw Kevin wink at him from his seat on the right hand side and he offered him up a small smile in return but little did his friend know he wanted to cry on the inside. He let his eyes drift to the top of the aisle where he saw Stephanie standing smiling at her father. She looked absolutely incredible and her beauty quite literally took his breath away. He didn't even notice the bridesmaids as they made their way towards him, his gaze transfixed on the woman he was head over heels in love with. It seemed like an eternity before her gaze met his as she walked down the aisle, arm in arm with her father. He struggled to breathe as he looked into her ocean blue eyes blown away by the love he knew he saw there; the same love he knew that was reflected in his.

As Stephanie got closer to him, he saw the unshed tears in her sad eyes. He pushed back the lump that had now appeared in his throat and as she approached the altar, he knew that this was it. The moment he had thought about for the last few months was finally going to happen and he was powerless to do anything to stop it. He watched with a heavy heart as she took her eyes away from his and smiled instead at her future husband as Vince released his baby girl and placed her right hand in Shawn's.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Stephanie pushed back the hard lump in her throat and letting out a shaky breath, she smiled at Shawn as she desperately tried to stay in control. Now was not the time to be losing it; not when there were over seventy people in the congregation. The same seventy people who would never guess that she was standing here feeling like her heart was breaking in two. After all, this was meant to be the happiest day of her life. The day she got to marry the man of her dreams. Or so they thought.

The truth was she'd been in a constant battle with herself all morning trying to decide the best thing to do for everyone. And the best thing was probably the easiest choice if she was honest. And when she'd finally made that choice, she'd been okay with it right up until the point when she had walked down the aisle and saw him standing there waiting. Paul. The guy with the most incredible brown eyes she had ever seen and the man responsible for turning her whole world upside down on its head. God, she had wanted nothing more than for him to be the person she was marrying today but she simply lacked the courage of her convictions. Her head was overriding her heart and she was so torn. Why did this have be so hard? Why did she have to be so confused?

Stephanie felt the tears start to well in her eyes and she quickly blinked them back. She loved Shawn. She did. That's why she had agreed to marry him in the first place. But if she was being honest with herself, she was no longer in love with him. Shawn was her best friend. He was dependable and reliable and was always there for her but unfortunately for Stephanie that didn't seem to be enough; not any more. Not now that she had met Paul and for the first time in forever she felt so alive.

From the very second she had seen him she had fallen in love with him. And that had thrown her for a loop because she's never been a big believer in love at first sight. In fact, she had been sure it just didn't exist and had ridiculed anyone who claimed it to be true. That was until the night her life had changed forever and her blue eyes had met Paul's across that room and she had felt it. It was an intense rush of emotions she had never experienced before. They had completely floored her. She remembered the way she had been drawn to him. Her whole body had tingled as he had smiled at her with that amazing smile of him. She had been completely blown away by him and if she was honest with herself, she still was. Paul was so warm and sincere. He made her laugh and it just felt so right when she was with him. The more she had gotten to know him, the more amazing she realised he was. Right up until the night she had found out he was Shawn's best friend.

The low drone of the minister's voice snapped Stephanie from of her thoughts as she realised that the wedding ceremony had begun. However, she was unable to focus on what was being said as she tried to reassure herself that she was doing absolutely the right thing. She could never consciously hurt Shawn. He just didn't deserve that. Shawn had been nothing but faithful and loyal to her throughout their three year relationship and now she was going to return that loyalty by agreeing to become his wife. It was her only choice. It was the best thing for everyone involved. 

Stephanie shifted her feet on the marble floor beneath her and that was when she felt him. She could feel Paul's eyes watching her from behind Shawn's shoulder. She tried her hardest not to look at him. If she did, she knew her resolve would break and she wouldn't go through with this. Paul had told her that he understood and respected her decision to marry Shawn but she knew that after today, she would never see him again. He had told her he would cut all contact with them and not because he wanted to. It was because it would hurt him too much to see Shawn live happily ever after with the woman he loved. He had told her he couldn't pretend she was nothing more than a friend to him; not with the way he felt about her. He just wasn't built that way.  
Stephanie tried not to cry as Paul's words echoed in her mind, haunting her. His brown eyes had been filled with such sadness and pain. She knew she had broken his heart and for that she would never ever forgive herself.

"Steph."

She felt the slight nudge in her side and glanced round to see Shawn smile and whisper to her.

"It's your turn to say I do." he prompted. 

She forced a smile as her stomach twisted into a giant knot. She felt nauseous as she realised that there was no turning back now. This was it. This was the start of the rest of her life. So why did it feel more like the end of something?

She could feel everyone's eyes on her as they waited for her to give her answer. She suddenly felt the overwhelming need to turn around and run as fast as she could away from here and away from everyone but her feet remained rooted to the spot. She would be far too scared to face the repercussions of her actions if she didn't go ahead with this wedding. It was what everyone wanted. It was what everyone expected. Stephanie looked towards the minister and her voice was barely a whisper as she uttered the two words that would change absolutely everything.

"I do." 

As she felt Shawn squeeze her hand, she felt her heart sink. She knew there was no turning back now and she was just going to have to find a way to live with the consequences of her actions. She was simply going to have to find a way to survive without Paul.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

_Flashback – One Month Earlier_

Stephanie smiled at the young bar tender as she swivelled round on her stool. Her blue eyes quickly appraised the small hotel bar as she placed her straw in her mouth taking a sip from her drink and grimacing ever so slightly as the coldness hit the back of her throat. The place was practically empty apart from the two old men sitting at a table in the corner, a couple of girls across of them and a guy with blonde hair sitting at the opposite end of the bar. She couldn't make out his face as he was sitting side-on to her and it was masked by his long strands as he focused on whatever it was he had in front of him. But that didn't matter to her as she was more than content to check out the parts of him that she could see.

Smirking to herself, Stephanie took another mouthful of her drink as she let her eyes take in his appearance. It was plainly obvious the guy worked out judging from his build and the way his black t-shirt stretched across his thick bicep. God, she'd never seen an arm so muscular and up close before. Big built guys had always been attractive to her though and this one was no exception. She let her eyes linger for second longer before they travelled downwards towards the bottom half of his body. She noticed he was wearing a pair of faded denim jeans and they appeared to fit him extremely well judging by the parts of his ass and legs that were on view to her. In fact, the material seemed to mould perfectly to him.

Stephanie's shoulders rose and fell with her dreamy, contented sigh. Really, it had to be illegal for denim to look so damn good. She could only imagine what that ass looked like from behind though. As Stephanie lightly chuckled to herself, her gaze slowly drifted back up to the bar. Her blue eyes widened and her mouth parted with her silent gasp. The hot guy was now watching her back. She squirmed in her seat as she felt the intensity of his stare. His chocolate brown pools were looking at her inquisitively. Stephanie felt the heat rush to her face but she didn't look away. For some reason she was unable to tear her eyes from him despite her embarrassment at being caught in the act. God, he was absolutely gorgeous. Just then his lips curved up gently and she found herself unable to stop herself grinning back at him. She could also feel the faint fluttering in her chest. Shit. And now he was getting up from his seat. He was coming over to her!

Stephanie shifted on her stool as she quickly wiped her sweaty palm on her skirt. She let out a calming breath and placed her drink down on the bar as she sensed him approaching. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest with anticipation as she licked her lips and began to rack her brains wondering what the hell she was going to say to him.

"Excuse me."

Stephanie lifted her head at the sound of his voice. She tried to appear casual as she offered him a smile ignoring the nervous tingles throughout her entire body.

"Do I know you?" he asked her, his nose scrunching cutely with his question.

She swallowed thickly as she shook her head. "No. No… actually you don't."

"I see." His brown eyes glinted at her as the left corner of his mouth rose into a tiny smirk. "So were you just checking me out then?"

Stephanie felt her whole face explode with heat as she shifted uncomfortably on her stool. She saw those brown eyes sparkle as his shoulders began to shake with his laughter. It was a beautiful laugh. It was deep and incredibly sexy. In fact every single thing about this guy was sexy.

"Look I'm sorry. I was only messing with you." he grinned. "I didn't mean to embarrass you or anything."

She tried to be casual as she sniffed almost defiantly. "Actually you didn't embarrass me."

"Well I'm glad to hear it."

The guy paused as he stared at her thoughtfully, seeming to consider something for a second while his big hand lifted to absently scratch at his neatly trimmed beard.

"Though just to be on the safe side, how about you let me make it up to you by buying you a drink? Will you join me?" he asked her as his hand fell and gestured in the direction of his bar stool.

Stephanie answered without hesitation as she nodded and accepted his offer. She didn't even question her own boldness as she stood up and followed Paul taking her drink with her. She smiled as he pulled out the stool next to him helping her sit down.

"Let me just get this mess tidied up."

She sipped from her straw as Paul gathered up his things, neatly stacking the various pieces of paper he had scattered on the bar. She tilted her head in interest, watching him place them in a folder recognising that the papers were plans of some sort.

"So, did you draw those?" she asked him.

"Yeah." he smiled back a little proudly.

"They look pretty cool. What are they for?"

"It's some new housing development in the city." he explained as he sat down next to her raking his fingers through his long blonde strands

Stephanie raised her brow feeling intrigued. "So you're an architect then?"

"That's what they call me." He lifted his hand to summon the bar tender. "So, I promised you a drink. What can I get you?"

"A White Russian?"

He smiled and proceeded to order their drinks. Stephanie took another mouthful from her glass and as she placed it back down on the bar, she found herself watching him once more, perfectly content to admire him. There was just something about this guy that drew her to him. She wasn't in the habit of having a drink with strange men in hotel bars but for some reason this felt perfectly natural to her. Then of course there was the fact she was most definitely attracted to him. There was no question he was an extremely gorgeous guy and her body was a mass of tingles every time he threw a smile in her direction. God, she could feel that fluttering in her chest even now. She had never felt this way about any man before now, not even Shawn.

Stephanie sighed at the simple thought of his name. She deliberately blocked any thoughts about Shawn from her head. After all, she had no reason to feel guilty about any of this. She was just being polite and having a drink with a nice guy. There was no harm in that at all. No harm whatsoever.

"Here you go. One vodka for the lovely lady."

She smiled as she accepted her drink from him and tried to ignore the tingling sensation as her fingertips brushed over his.

"So, you never did tell me your name." he said before taking a sip from his bottle of beer.

Stephanie looked at him shyly as she twirled her straw around in her glass. She lifted her shoulder in a light shrug. "Well that's because you never asked me."

"I'm asking you now."

Her lips curved up gently as his brown eyes looked back at her. "It's Stephanie."

"Stephanie." he repeated as he began to pick at the corner label on his bottle. "That's a beautiful name. In fact I'd say it's a beautiful name for an extremely beautiful woman."

She shook her head at his flirtatious tone. "I bet you say that to all the girls."

Her blue eyes watched him as she took a mouthful of her drink. His fingers reached to push back his hair from his forehead as he shook his head.

"You're the only one. Well, at least tonight anyways." he smirked.

Stephanie laughed as she shifted on her stool, placing her glass down on the cherry wood of the bar and licking her lip gloss. "So, do you have one? A name, I mean."

"Funnily enough, I do." He grinned once more unwittingly causing her heart to flip in her chest. "It's Paul." he told her.

Stephanie's brow crinkled with her frown. "You do know that's a total contradiction right there."

"What do you mean?"

She smirked as she copied his earlier flirtatious tone, unable to help herself. "Well Paul, that name means little one and I can see there's nothing little about you at all."

"Oh you got that right." he winked.

Her cheeks instantly flushed with heat at his obvious innuendo. Stephanie glanced away and picked up her glass pretending to busy herself with her drink.

"I'm sorry. I've embarrassed you again, haven't I?"

His hand reached out touching her arm. She tried not to notice how warm his fingers felt or how they made her pulse jump. She swallowed thickly as she raised her eyes to meet his apologetic smile. "That's okay. It just means that I let you buy me another drink."

Paul's smile crept across his face as his hand lingered on her forearm. "Well you won't hear any complaints from me on that score." His incredible brown eyes watched her for a second making her struggle to catch her breath before he moved away, her body instantly feeling cold as it missed his touch. "So Stephanie, what brings you to the lovely city of Boston?"

"Business." she told him.

"And what kind of business is that?"

"Publishing. I'm an editor for a company in New York."

Stephanie found the words flowed easily between them as she told Paul all about her life including her career and her family. She didn't know why but she omitted the fact that she had a fiancé waiting for her at home and that they were to be married in one month's time. She knew it was completely wrong of her but really what harm could it do? She was only talking to a guy that after tonight, she would probably never see again. As she talked, she quickly glanced down towards her left hand. She hadn't meant to leave her engagement ring on the bathroom sink at home but she had been in such a rush to catch her plane this morning that she had forgotten all about it. Now it appeared to be a stroke of good luck. She was sure that had she been wearing her ring, she wouldn't be sitting here now having a really good time with Paul.

As Stephanie happily continued her conversation with Paul, she pushed all thoughts of Shawn from her head. She had to. If she didn't, she would feel guilty and then she would have to ask herself exactly what the hell she was doing.

A couple of hours later they were walking along the hotel corridor, their footsteps echoing down the deserted hall. Paul had been a true gentleman offering to escort her back to her room even though he was three floors above her. Of course, Stephanie had been more than happy to oblige as it meant getting to spend even more time with him. She had enjoyed herself so much tonight. She was feeling pleasantly buzzed right now and it wasn't just the six drinks she had consumed. It was Paul. He was a really nice guy and so funny too. She'd literally been in stitches at some of the stories he had told her. She honestly couldn't remember the last time she'd laughed so much or so hard. She'd had an incredible time but unfortunately for her, it would be over all too soon.

As they approached her door, Stephanie reached into her bag and searched for the key. She rummaged around for a moment before holding it up triumphantly in the air. She smiled at Paul who was standing with his hands stuffed in his jeans pockets, watching her intently.

"So, would you like to come in for a drink?" she asked him.

Paul paused and licked his lips as he pondered her invitation. His head was screaming yes because the truth was he wanted nothing more than to be with Stephanie. She was smart and funny and he had loved spending time with her but the trouble was he knew he wouldn't be responsible for his actions once he had her all alone. He was a man after all and she was a woman – an extremely beautiful woman at that and a woman that he was most definitely attracted to. In fact, if he was honest with himself, she had him totally hooked. Stephanie was like no one he had met before. And Christ, she was sexy but they had both had a lot to drink, especially Stephanie and it wasn't in his nature to take advantage of a woman who might not be totally in control of herself no matter how badly he wanted her. And God, did he want her.

Swallowing thickly, Paul drew on his resolve and quickly shook his head before he could change his mind. "I don't think that's a good idea Steph."

She pouted sexily as she looked at him, her fingertips lifting to trace the button at the neck of his polo shirt. "Why? Did you not have a good time this evening?"

"Of course I did but honestly, I think it's time to call it a night."

Stephanie tried to quench her disappointment as Paul's hand covered hers drawing it away from his chest.

"I also think I couldn't trust myself to be alone with you in your hotel room."

Stephanie saw the desire in his deep brown eyes and felt her body tingle as she realised that Paul was as attracted to her just as much as she was to him. Without any hesitation at all, she crossed the short distance between them and wrapped her arms around his thick neck.

"Stephanie, I don't think….."

Paul's words were cut off as she pressed her lips firmly against his. Unable to help himself, he eagerly returned the kiss. His thick fingers tangled in her soft strands as their mouths moved together. As he tilted his head he breathed her in, smelling her perfume. It was sweet and intoxicating just like Stephanie. God, he wanted her badly and this wasn't helping matters at all. In fact, he was sorely tempted to just throw caution to the wind and be with her. It was what he wanted. It was what they both wanted. Letting his need for her take over, Paul's mouth parted slightly deepening the kiss. He growled softly as he felt her tongue brush over his tasting him and tempting him even further. He placed his left hand across her back as he pulled her body closer into his.

Feeling his hard heat pressed against her, Stephanie's hands moved to cup his ass, her fingers lightly gripping the faded denim. As she grinded into him, his lips moved towards her neck and gently caressed her skin before his tongue flicked out tasting her skin. She let out a soft moan as her eyes flickered open. As they hazily glanced over Paul's shoulder, they widened with alarm as she saw an elderly man staring at them from the opposite end of the corridor. She whispered into Paul's ear as he continued to focus his attention on her neck.

"Paul, we'd better stop." She paused as she swallowed thickly, her desire for him pooling in the pit of her stomach. "We seem to have an audience." she eventually told him.

Her words brought Paul to his senses and he pulled away gently from Stephanie. His wet mouth prickled with the taste of her skin as he turned round to see the man shake his head and enter his room. He laughed at his reaction as his fingers raked through his blonde hair. He heard Stephanie giggle beside him.

"Judging from his expression, I think we'd better take this inside."

As Stephanie turned to slide her key in her door, Paul placed his hand on her arm stalling her movement. He mentally cursed his personal morals as he reluctantly made his excuses to her.

"Look Steph, I'm going to head back to my room if you don't mind. I've got an early start in the morning anyway."

Stephanie tried her best to mask her disappointment as her lips briefly lifted in the faintest of smiles. "Okay. Well, thank you for tonight. It was nice to meet you Paul."

Feeling embarrassed and a little mad, she was unable to look at him as she turned back round towards her door. But she was quickly tugged back round as Paul put his hand on her arm, pulling her back towards him. She stared at the faded pattered carpet reluctant to meet his eye.

"Please, don't be mad."

She chewed on the inside of her lip as she continued to stare at the floor.

"It's not that I don't want to come inside that room with you because, believe me, I do."

This time, she tilted her head upwards, unable to disguise the slight smile that appeared on her face. She saw his brown eyes watching her carefully. They held a soft and genuine expression.

"It's just that, well, I'm not in the habit of sleeping with a woman. Not without at least taking her to dinner first."

Stephanie couldn't help but laugh as Paul stood there grinning widely at her as he took her hand in his. Her body was still warm in the delicious aftermath of their kiss.

"Is this your way of asking me to dinner, Paul?"

He lifted his shoulder in a shy shrug. "Well, you did mention you were here until the weekend. I just happen to be here too and I wouldn't mind spending some of my free time with you."

She smiled at him warmly. "Dinner sounds good to me. How about I meet you in the bar at 7.00pm and we can take it from there?"

Paul nodded his agreement as Stephanie leaned up and kissed him on the cheek resisting the urge to taste his lips once more knowing that if she did, she wouldn't want to let him go.

"Goodnight Paul. I'll see you tomorrow."

She opened her door and walked into her room. Only then did she look back at Paul and smile at him softly before closing the door over behind her. Her smile lingered as she flicked on the light and wandered over to the large king size bed. She threw her bag down on the chair and kicked off her shoes before lying down, the comforter crumpling underneath her. As she nestled into the plush cushions, Stephanie's mind drifted to their kiss. It had been amazing and had quite literally stolen her breath away. She had never thought one kiss could be so wonderful and elicit such feelings in her. And God how she had wanted him; she had wanted him so badly. What scared her though was the depth of her feelings and for a man she had only just met. It didn't seem real. But of course that was far from the truth. What she felt for Paul was real. It was so real she was prepared to risk everything to be with him.

Stephanie jumped as the ringing echoed out in the quiet hotel room. She felt a pang of guilt in her chest as she looked over to see Shawn's name flash up on the screen. She continued to lie and watch her cell phone as it continued to ring out. She couldn't face speaking to Shawn. Not now; not when all she could think about was Paul. So when the room eventually went silent, she sighed with relief and immediately grabbed her phone switching it off. Deep down, she knew what she was doing was wrong but she couldn't help herself. It wasn't her fault that she had come here on business only to find the man of her dreams sitting directly across from her. Didn't she owe it to herself to explore those feelings she had? After all, she was getting married in a month. What if she was making a huge mistake by marrying the one man she had been with her entire life? Maybe this was her chance to determine once and for all whether Shawn was the right one for her. Refusing to think about anything any further, Stephanie switched on the television to try and distract herself from dwelling on her current situation. She had to. If she didn't she might just let the guilt start to creep into her heart and stop her from going through with her dinner date with Paul.

And that just wasn't an option for her. Not any more.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Stephanie lifted her wrist and checked the glass face on her watch as she walked through the busy hotel lobby. She smiled as she saw it was exactly five minutes after seven; late enough that she didn't appear too desperate or eager yet early enough to be courteous to Paul by not keeping him waiting on her too long. Of course that's if he was even inside the bar yet. God, she hoped he was. All day long she had been thinking about him and counting the hours until she would see him again. She had felt like some silly kid with a crush. But the way she had felt when Paul had kissed her was anything but childlike. He had left her reeling and overwhelmed. He had left her wanting so much more.

Letting out a calming breath, Stephanie's hand smoothed down her black dress and she tentatively walked into the bar glancing around for any sign of him. She didn't have to look far as she saw the unmistakable head of soft blonde hair positioned in the exact same seat as the previous evening. Her heart flipped in her chest as he lifted his head and his face lit up with his smile when he saw her standing there. As Paul stood up from the stool to greet her, she let herself admire him thinking how handsome he looked in his black pinstriped suit and white cotton shirt. The top few buttons were undone exposing his thick, tanned neck allowing her to imagine her lips touching him there, tasting his skin.

"Hey you."

His deep gravelled tone lifted her from her haze and Stephanie felt the heat rush to her cheeks as she quickly drew her eyes away from the column of his throat.

"Are you okay? You look like you were off in your own little world there." he asked her.

She nodded her head as she licked her lips and tucked a loose curl behind her left ear. "Sorry. I was just thinking how warm it is in here tonight. Are you warm?" she asked him as she swallowed thickly and tried to disguise the real reason why she was feeling so flustered. Paul's deep brown eyes twinkled back at her.

"Well I have to admit the sight of you walking into the room did raise the temperature a couple of notches."

He grinned at her and she felt the butterflies flutter madly in her chest.

"Oh and by the way, this is for you."

Stephanie's mouth parted in surprise as Paul produced a single pink rose from behind his back. She smiled at him gratefully as she took it from his outstretched hand, touched by the sentiment as she brought the soft petals to her nose and inhaled the sweet scent. "Thank you Paul. The flower is beautiful."

He lifted his shoulder in a shrug. "It's not as beautiful as you look tonight."

Her cheeks flushed once more at his compliment as she gave him a bashful smile.

"So, are you ready to go?"

Stephanie nodded as she clutched the rose and her purse in her left hand. She felt a tingle of pleasure as she felt Paul's arm bump against her before shyly lacing his fingers through hers. Her lips twitched with her smile as she relished how warm and soft his touch felt and at the same time so safe and secure. Her stomach bubbled with excitement as they made their way towards the hotel entrance.

"Where are we going anyway?" she asked him as they stepped outside into the cooling evening breeze as the low evening sun began to set behind the tall granite buildings.

"It's a little Italian restaurant just around the corner." smiled Paul as he raked his hand through his hair. "The food is fantastic and I reckon the company will be just as good tonight."

He winked at her flooding her whole body with heat as they walked in hand in hand down the tree lined street and towards the restaurant.

A couple of hours later Stephanie was leaning back in her chair as the low sound of some classical tune played in the background and her hand rubbed across her slightly bloated stomach. As she glanced around her, she knew that Paul had been absolutely right about this place. The food had been fantastic so much so she had polished off everything on her plate and now she was absolutely stuffed full. She wasn't sure she could move let alone walk back to the hotel. Maybe she could persuade Paul to carry her instead. Smiling at that thought, her blue eyes looked at him across the table. It really had been an amazing night tonight. Paul was so much more than she could have ever dreamed of. He was polite, considerate, smart and funny and she just loved being with him. All through dinner she kept having these thoughts about him; thoughts that told her just how badly she was falling for him, that's if she hadn't fallen hard already. She was experiencing all these feelings inside her; feelings that told her what she already knew. Paul had captured her heart. The only question was, had she captured his? As his brown eyes lifted to meet hers, she'd like to think she had. Her facial expression was soft as she sat forward in her chair.

"I don't think I'll be able to eat anything for a week." she told him.

Paul laughed as he pushed aside his empty plate. "You don't fancy dessert then?"

Stephanie puffed her cheeks out as she shook her head that was pleasantly buzzed from the mixture of food and wine. "Absolutely not. I couldn't. You have some though."

"What I want isn't on the menu I'm afraid." grinned Paul wickedly raising his eyebrows at her as he rested his thick forearms on the white linen tablecloth.

Stephanie decided to play him at his own game. "So what? Now that I've had dinner with you, you're expecting me to keep up my end of the bargain and have sex with you?" she teased, her big blue eyes sparkling back at him.

Paul snorted as he pretended to look shocked. "I wouldn't have put it so bluntly. For a lady, you're very forward you know."

Stephanie leaned over as she covered his hand in hers. She wasn't sure if it was the alcohol or her desire for this man but suddenly she felt extremely bold as she stared at him seductively. "Well then you won't be shocked when I say to you to hurry up and pay the bill so we can get back to the hotel."

She let her eyes linger for a second before reaching down to retrieve her purse as she made her way to the restrooms. She sensed Paul was watching her as she disappeared among the other diners so she let her hips sway that little bit more and tried to ignore the tiny knot of guilt in the pit of her stomach; the tiny knot of guilt that reminded her she was engaged to another man. A man that had never entered her head the entire time she had been with Paul and that alone told her something. But she wasn't going to think about that right now. In actual fact, she wasn't going to think at all. Rightly or wrongly, she was simply following her feelings; feelings that she trusted without question because if what she felt for Paul was wrong then she didn't want to know what right was and she owed this to herself. She needed to explore these emotions and know for sure if Paul was the one for her although deep down she knew she already had her answer.

Stephanie smiled softly as she looked at her reflection in the mirror. By the time she had returned to the table, Paul was standing looking around him almost impatiently as he waited by their empty table. As he turned his head, he noticed her approach him and Stephanie felt her body tingle with anticipation as he grinned at her.

"The cheque's paid McMahon. Let's get the hell out of here."

Stephanie screamed in surprise as he grabbed her arm and whisked her through the restaurant and out the door. Her laughter carried in the wind as they stepped out onto the street however she could feel the tension building between them the closer they got to the hotel. But she never second guessed herself. She knew she wanted this. She needed this with everything inside her.

They were silent as they made their way to Paul's room. She could smell his cologne as he escorted her inside and as she looked around the neat and tidy space, her eyes fell to the large king sized bed. She swallowed thickly as she placed her purse and her rose down on the blue wingback chair and felt her body shiver as Paul stood behind her placing his big hands on her bare shoulder. She felt her body lean into him as he dropped a kiss there.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" he breathed against her ear.

She didn't hesitate for one second as she turned in his arms and reaching on her tiptoes, she gently brushed her lips over his. Her body sighed as he eagerly kissed her back. She could taste the mixture of alcohol and mint on his hot breath as his mouth parted slightly, his tongue flicking out to tease her bottom lip before slipping inside to taste her. Her heart raced as their tongues moved together and tingles of desire shot up and down her spine. Paul began to slowly guide her towards the bed. The back of her legs hit the mattress as his mouth sought out her neck. She whimpered softly as he sucked and nipped at her skin and his long blonde strands moved over her. Her hands slightly trembled as she began to fumble with the buttons on his shirt. She needed him so badly. She wanted to feel close to him in every way possible.

As she pushed his shirt off his shoulders, Paul lifted his head from her throat. His brown eyes were dark and intense as he watched her; his breathing quick and heavy and Stephanie realised he wanted her every bit as much as she wanted him. She let out a gasp as he lifted her up and she wrapped her long legs around his waist as he kissed her once more. Her long fingers tangled in his hair as he lowered the straps of her dress from her shoulders.

"Paul!" she sighed, his name falling from her lips as his mouth covered her creamy breast. Her head fell backwards and she closed her eyes as she felt the material pool at her waist. She arched her back against him giving in to his touch. He was rough yet gentle. He was driving her wild. His mouth moved to her other breast, his tongue wet against her skin. She could feel the heat from his body as she shifted her legs. Her body was aching for him. Christ. She wanted him so much. When he pulled his mouth away, Stephanie shivered. Paul smiled slightly as he carried her to the bed and gently placed her on the mattress before slipping off her dress. The covers crinkled underneath his weight as he hovered over her. He kissed her hard as his hands ran up and down her body and Stephanie closed her eyes and lost herself in him…

They both lay beside one another as they tried to control their breathing. No words were spoken as Paul wrapped his arm around Stephanie as she nestled her head against his chest. Only a few minutes had passed when he felt her breathing even out as she drifted off to sleep and he turned his head kissing her hair. A wave of emotion rushed through him as he pulled her even closer into his body. The truth was he just couldn't have Stephanie close enough. The experience they had just shared was nothing short of amazing and Paul knew that there was no turning back now; not for him at least. This went beyond anything he had felt for anyone before. It was like there was some sort of connection between them; some sort of bond that had joined them body and soul. He had known instinctively what Stephanie had needed and vice versa. The simple fact was he was completely overwhelmed by the woman in his arms and he knew without doubt that Stephanie was the one; the girl he was meant to be with. And that was absolutely crazy on so many levels but he knew what he felt. More than that, he trusted it.

As he let his mind drift, Paul's eyes began to blink heavily as Stephanie's breathing began to lull him into sleep. His eyes eventually closed and kissing her hair one more time, his fingers brushed through her long strands and his hushed voice echoed in the darkness.

"I think I'm in love with you."

Moments passed as he eventually fell into a deep slumber and Paul failed to hear the words that filled the silent room, quietly answering him.

"I think I'm in love with you too."


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Stephanie's eyes flickered open as the soft rays of the morning sunlight fell across her face. As she shifted her head on the soft pillows, she became aware of the weight across her stomach and she smiled feeling Paul's arm pull her body into his. Tingles of pleasure shot through her as his hard heat pressed against her and she let out a sigh of contentment as his soft, warm lips caressed her shoulder

"Good morning beautiful." he hushed against her ear, his whispered breath making her eyelids close over with desire. Her fingers reached up to tangle in his long blonde strands and his lips brushed over hers in a slow, gentle kiss. She sighed in blissful satisfaction as Paul shifted over her, sweeping her hair over her forehead.

"You know I reckon I could be the luckiest guy in the world right now." he smirked.

Despite his grin, Stephanie heard the sincerity in his thick, husky tone and felt touched as she realised last night meant every bit as much to him as it did to her. Her lips curved up gently as she met his incredible brown eyes.

"Well I guess that makes me the luckiest woman then." she said as she cupped his face with her hand and pressed her lips against his once more. As his hand skimmed over her body, she felt herself melt into him as he massaged his tongue temptingly with hers. She eagerly explored his mouth wanting to taste him, feeling her desire grow as he stole her breath away.

But her lips felt cold and prickled with their disappointment as the phone rang and Paul broke their kiss lightly cursing under his breath as he reached over her to answer the call. His fingers pressed into her stomach as he brought the receiver to his ear.

"Hello?"

Stephanie's blue eyes watched his facial expression as he chewed on his lip while listening to the person at the other end.

"So when do they want to meet with us?" he asked as he moved away from her to prop himself up against the pillows adjusting the covers around her as he continued the conversation. At one point he glanced at her and rolled his eyes making her giggle. As she snuggled under the blankets, she felt him place his arm around her and nestling into him, she rested his head on his shoulder.

"Okay. Give me half an hour and I'll be there."

Stephanie looked up as he ended the call. Paul's shoulders rose and fell with his sigh as he smiled at her apologetically.

"I'm sorry. I'm going to have to cut this short and meet with the builders. Apparently there's some problem with the plans I submitted yesterday."

Stephanie nodded her head as she smiled at him reassuringly. "That's okay. I've got an appointment at ten anyway and I should probably be making a move."

Paul's brown eyes simply watched her for a moment and she swallowed thickly under the weight of his stare before he kissed her gently on the forehead and swung his legs over the bed. Stephanie was perfectly content to lie back in the warmth of the covers and admire his perfect naked body as he made his way towards the bathroom. A warm fission of desire pooled in her stomach as she watched him disappear behind the door and her thoughts turned to the night they had just shared.

Quite honestly, it was like nothing she had experienced in her life before. No-one had ever made her feel so alive and so cherished. Paul had left no part of her untouched as he brought her to heights no-one had ever even come close to bringing her. It was like he had a roadmap to her soul. He instinctively knew what she wanted and needed from him. Sure, she had always had some sort of pleasure from her sexual experiences but she had never felt such emotion or felt so connected with someone as she had with Paul. Not even with Shawn.

Stephanie sighed and shook her head slightly as she blocked any further thoughts of her fiancé. She knew she would have to face up to what she had done sooner or later but for now, she was hundreds of miles away and it was so easy to put it all to the back of her mind and forget about everything for at least another couple of days. She was just enjoying being with Paul and spending time with him. And if that made her a selfish brat she didn't care. But she knew that inevitably she would have to make a decision and that decision would largely depend upon Paul and what he wanted. She didn't have a clue if he planned to take things any further after the end of this trip. She only knew she wanted him to and part of her held out some hope that he did especially after his whispered revelation last night.

God, she had been completely surprised and overwhelmed when she had heard him say those three words to her; three words that were so little yet had such made a huge impact. She had lain silent in the darkness knowing Paul was under the impression she was fast asleep and obviously didn't want her to hear his confession. But she had and it had left her feeling overwhelmed and stunned and now in the light of day, a little confused. Now she wondered if he had truly meant what he had said or if he was just swept away by the emotions of their night spent together. Besides, they had only just met. How could he know he loved her like that? How could he know that what he felt for her was real? It was all far too soon.

But when she had whispered that she loved him back, she knew she had meant it from the bottom of her heart. Paul had swept her off her feet and turned her whole world upside down. She knew she had developed strong, intense feelings for him; feelings that could only be explained as love. It had to be. It was like nothing else she had experienced in her life before. She just couldn't stop thinking about him and her whole body felt alive every time she was beside him. And every time she looked into those incredible brown eyes of his she got lost in him. Any doubts she did have about the true nature of her feelings for him, well they disappeared the minute their bodies joined as one. After last night she knew without question that she loved him. The only question was did Paul really feel the same way for her? Could it even be possible that this amazing man felt exactly the same way as she did? She knew she would need to find out some answers and contemplate what her future could be before she went home and faced up to the fact that her relationship with Shawn could possibly be over.

As Stephanie's blue eyes lifted to the ceiling, she heard the bathroom door open and she glanced across to see Paul emerging with a towel wrapped around his waist, his damp blonde strands falling around his shoulders causing droplets of water to trickle down his chest. She licked her lips as she let her eyes follow a trail to his smooth toned stomach and Paul flashed her a grin as he walked over to the bed bending over her to give her a kiss. Stephanie shrieked as he then shook his head causing the cold droplets to hit her skin.

"Paul, you're getting me all wet." she scolded.

A slow sexy smirk crossed his face making her chest flutter madly. "Well now, I didn't realise my kisses affected you that badly."

His deep laughter rang out as Stephanie began to blush and she stuck her tongue out at him as he tossed his towel to the side and pulled on a pair of black boxer shorts. She was more than happy to watch him dress, her eyes appreciating his firm smooth skin before it was disappointingly covered by his crisp black shirt and a matching pinstripe suit. His big hands scraped his wet hair back into a ponytail before he turned from the mirror and walked back to the bed, sitting down and taking her hand in his. His thumb traced lovely circles on her knuckles as she breathed in the citrus scent of his cologne.

"So McMahon, do you think you could find time to have dinner with me again tonight?"

Stephanie nodded, smiling at him seductively. "I'm sure I can fit you in but on one condition."

"What's that?"

"That afterwards, you bring me back here and we repeat what we did last night all over again."

Paul raised his eyebrows and smirked as he stroked her face with her hand. "Oh, I'm pretty sure I can promise you that."

His lips met hers in a slow, tender kiss pulling on her bottom lip before he reluctantly broke away.

"Unfortunately though, I need to go."

Paul stood up and placed his wallet in his pocket before grabbing some paperwork and his key card from the dresser. His brown eyes sparkled as he turned to her and winked.

"I'll see you later beautiful. Is seven o'clock at the bar okay for you?"

Stephanie smiled and nodded. "Seven is absolutely fine."

The door clicked shut behind him and she allowed herself one long stretch in bed before throwing back the covers and getting dressed. The sooner she got her day started, the sooner it would be over and she would be spending time with Paul.

Stephanie anxiously tapped her fingers against the cherry wood bar as she waited for Paul to arrive. This was the last night they would spend together before they both went their separate ways – her to New York and Paul to Nashua. The last three days spent with him had been nothing short of amazing but sadly it was all coming to an end and all too soon.

Stephanie glanced at her watch and sighed. It was now twenty five minutes after nine. Paul had told her he would be here by nine on the dot but he was obviously held up at his meeting with his client. Unfortunately that client had insisted on conducting the meeting over dinner so she had been unable to eat with Paul tonight much to her disappointment. She wanted to spend as much time with him as she could but at least they would be able to spend the rest of the evening together; well at least she hoped they would. She needed to see him. Not only that, she wanted to talk to Paul. She couldn't let him leave without letting him know where she stood and admit the truth.

Stephanie took another mouthful of her drink and noticing it was almost empty, she summoned the bar tender for another. The vodka was Dutch courage for her. God knows she was so nervous about tonight but she had to tell him. She had to confess to Paul she was in love him. Keeping it all inside was driving her nuts and not only that, she was hoping that it might prompt Paul to confess how he felt about her. She needed to know what he was thinking. She needed to know if they stood a chance before she went home and turned her entire life upside down.

As she placed her order with the bar tender, Stephanie suddenly felt his strong arms behind her as they slid around her waist. Her heart skipped a beat as she turned her head and smiled as Paul placed a kiss on her cheek.

"Hey you." he smiled. "I'm sorry I'm so late. My client droned on for way longer than I wanted to."

Stephanie chuckled as he took the seat beside her. He lifted his hand to catch the bar tender's attention as he prepared her drink.

"Can I get a beer with that please?"

The bar tender nodded and Paul turned back to her as he loosened the pale purple tie around his neck.

"So, did you have a good day today? Your writer signed on the dotted line, right?"

She nodded as she took a sip from her vodka. "He did and he was very happy with the terms and conditions we offered him."

"So, the poor guy fell for your charms hook, line and sinker then?"

"He sure did."

"That's my girl." he winked before turning to get his drink from the bar.

Stephanie felt the anxious knot in the pit of her stomach as she watched him. Now Paul was here, she was a complete bundle of nerves. She usually didn't cope well with confrontation but she couldn't wait any longer. Time was running out for them and she needed to know exactly where she stood. She couldn't wait until later. Besides, later she would be in Paul's arms in his bed and she wanted to cherish those final hours together. She didn't want anything spoiling them. Not only that she wasn't so sure they would get a whole lot of talking done anyway. It seemed that when she was alone with Paul, all conversation went out the window and they had the uncanny knack of ending up in bed together. She didn't know what it was. All she knew was she couldn't keep her hands off him. She craved his touch constantly. She needed him like the very air she breathed.

"Steph? Are you okay?"

Paul's voice lifted her from haze and Stephanie nodded, touching his arm and gesturing to the table in the corner.

"Do you think we could sit over there? I'd like to talk to you about something."

Paul raised his brow curiously and nodded his head. He clutched the neck of his beer between his fingers as he followed her to the small table in the far corner of the room. As he squeezed his way past a group of chairs, he wondered what it was Stephanie wanted to talk about. Whatever it was, he knew it was serious. He could tell by the way she was nervously fidgeting with her hands and the preoccupied look in her eyes. She obviously had something major going on in that pretty little head of hers. And although he was a little tentative to know what she had to say to him, he was glad he was getting this opportunity to talk. There were a few things he had been planning to say to Stephanie anyway. He had just been a little unsure how to broach it but now he had the perfect chance. Or at least he hoped he did.

As Paul pulled out the seat across from her, he placed his beer down on the table. His brown eyes watched her as he sat down carefully noticing she kept her gaze firmly locked on the drink in front of her. She refused to look at him and Stephanie was silent as her manicured fingers stirred the straw moving the ice in small circles. Paul pressed his lips together thoughtfully as he sat back against the blue padded cushion. It was obvious she was reluctant to start the conversation which made him start to feel a little anxious himself. He thought he'd been pretty clued up as to what Stephanie wanted. Now he wasn't so sure. In fact he was second guessing himself and the feelings he thought she had for him which of course was now making him wonder if he really wanted to have this conversation after all. Especially when it had the potential to kick him in the teeth. Still, he needed to know. He needed to know what the hell Stephanie was thinking.

"So Steph, what's on your mind?" he asked her, prompting the conversation. The smile he offered her was cool and collected but inside he felt anything but.

It took her a moment before Stephanie slowly lifted her head and her blue eyes were wide yet determined as they settled on him. "Us." she told him simply.

Paul nodded as he waited for her to continue.

"I don't really know where to start to be honest so you'll have to forgive me if it comes out all wrong."

His expression was gentle as he reached across the table covering her hand with his warm palm. He felt some sort of comfort knowing Stephanie was every bit as nervous as he was.

"It's okay Steph. Just tell me anything."

Her lips trembled with her hesitant smile. "Anything, huh?"

"Anything." he said softly reassuring her.

"Okay but just do me a favour?"

"What?"

"Don't say a word until I'm done because there's every chance I could completely bottle it."

Paul smiled, amused as he nodded his agreement.

Stephanie shifted in her seat as she pushed her drink away and released the breath she didn't realise she had been holding. "Paul, I think…" she began but she quickly paused clearing her dry throat as she glanced at the table once more. Suddenly it felt terribly appealing and safer to bare her soul to a piece of wood especially when that piece of wood didn't have the potential to reject her and break her heart in two.

"Actually scratch that." she continued. "I don't think. I know for a fact that I'm in completely in love with you."

She briefly closed her eyes as she tilted her head upwards and let out a shaky breath. And as when she finally looked at Paul, Stephanie saw the gentle warmth in his brown eyes and any hesitation she had to talk to him slowly slipped away as she focused solely on him.

"I know it sounds crazy, right? I mean we've only known each other for such a short space of time so how could I possibly know that what I feel for you is real. But it is, Paul. It's real. So real that every minute I'm not with you, I'm thinking about you."

Stephanie confessed pressing her lips together in a shy smile before flicking her tongue out to wet them.

"That's why I can't just walk away from this when I get on that plane tomorrow morning. I want to be with you Paul and I need to know if you want to be with me too. And I hope you do. I really do."

Feeling terribly vulnerable now she had let Paul know in no uncertain terms where she stood, Stephanie glanced away as her earlier bravado seemed to quickly disappear. God, what had she done? What if her confession of love sent him running for the hills? She was terrified to look at Paul in case she saw nothing but pity or regret. She was scared she had misread the signs and had just made a fool of herself by putting herself out there. But it was too late to take it back now. She had said it. It was out there.

"Of course I do."

Paul's voice got her attention and Stephanie slowly lifted her eyes, meeting his as the blood beat loudly in her ears.

"I'm in love with you too, Steph and you know that."

Yes she did. She could see it. There was no mistaking the look of love in Paul's eyes right now and she wondered how she could have ever missed it before. It was so obvious. Paul loved her. He really truly loved her. She honestly felt like she could burst, she was so happy right now.

"You know from the minute I saw you, I was hooked." Paul confessed as he leant closer to her, threading their fingers together. "You're the most amazing woman I've ever met and I know that I don't ever want to let you go. I can't."

"I don't want to let you go either." she smiled as her blue eyes admired his handsome face. "But do you think we can make the long distance thing work between us?"

His left shoulder lifted in a shrug as he glanced down at their joined hands and began to toy with her slender fingers. "There's no denying it's going to be tough with us being so far apart."

Paul's long blonde strands fell across his eye as he tilted his head to look at her. His fingers slid deliciously through hers as he joined their hands together.

"But I know we can find a way to be together and who knows? Maybe I might be able to re-locate to New York. I don't have to be where I am but for now, I can always travel to see you at weekends."

His brown eyes twinkled mischievously as he tugged on her hands pulling her closer to him. His sexy smirk made her knees weak and Stephanie was suddenly glad she was sitting down because there was every chance with him looking at her like that, she could melt into a great big puddle on the floor.

"And through the week maybe we can settle for indulging in some phone sex. I love it when you talk dirty to me McMahon."

Stephanie laughed as she dropped her head to his shoulder resting it there for a moment as she felt his gentle heat envelop her. Paul dropped a kiss in her hair and as he laid his chin on her head, Stephanie knew she wanted to cherish the feeling of him holding her like this. It felt so right and so perfect. And who knows how long it would be before she saw him again. She had to enjoy every single second she had left.

"So, can I expect you to travel to New York any time soon?" she asked him, her stomach already fluttering strangely in anticipation of his reply.

"Well, it's funny you should say that."

Stephanie lifted her head and glanced at him curiously.

"I've got a friend who lives in New York. My best friend actually and I spoke to him just yesterday. I've promised him I'll go and visit him. He wants me to give him my seal of approval on the girl he's planning to marry. Poor soul! She doesn't know what she's letting herself in for."

Stephanie laughed as Paul smoothed back her hair kissing her on the tip of her nose.

"But I'll definitely have some free time which means we could make plans to see each other next weekend if you're up for it."

"Oh I'm definitely up for it." Stephanie grinned as her forehead dropped to rest against his. "As far as I'm concerned, next weekend can't come soon enough."

Paul's smile disappeared against her mouth as he began to kiss her slowly, unhurriedly. Like they had all the time in the world to be like this and she guessed they did now they had made the decision to be together. She'd also made another decision of her own. She had decided she wasn't going to say anything about Shawn to Paul. After all he didn't need to know about him or their engagement. Not now. Not now she had made her decision to tell Shawn it was over the second she got back home. So really it would be pointless ruining the little time they had left and besides, she didn't want to worry Paul. Shawn wasn't an issue so what was the point of making it one. What was the point in raking up a past that had absolutely no place in her future? A future that now lay with Paul. A future she was committed to one hundred percent. She was doing the right thing by not telling him and spoiling this. She was absolutely sure of it.

_One Week Later_

Stephanie stared impatiently around her apartment as she waited for Shawn to arrive. She was like a cat on hot bricks as she watched the clock, pacing up and down the floor. She couldn't believe it was a week since she had been home and she hadn't had the chance to talk to him yet because as soon as she got back, she had got his message on her answering machine. Shawn suddenly had to go to San Fransisco for a week on business and wasn't back until this afternoon. He was a manager for a chain of gyms across the country and apparently one of the buildings had caught fire and burned to the ground leaving Shawn to handle the insurance claim. Of course that left her waiting to tell him it was over between them. She just couldn't believe it. She was so sure that by the time Paul arrived this weekend, everything between her and Shawn would be sorted out. Okay, she had spoken to Shawn on the phone every night since he had been gone but this was something she had to do face to face. She owed him that much at least. Fortunately for her, she wasn't meeting Paul until tomorrow and that worked out perfectly for Stephanie. That gave her tonight to talk to Shawn and tell him the truth.

Stephanie turned to glance out the window jumping as she heard the loud shrill of the phone as it rang out in the apartment. She quickly crossed the room and answered it. "Hello?"

"Hey Steph, it's me." greeted Shawn. "Listen, would you mind if I just meet you at Benny's? My flight was delayed and if I come and pick you up at the apartment, it means I'll be running late."

Stephanie's brow crinkled with confusion. "Running late for what? I didn't know we had any plans for tonight."

She heard his heavy sigh down the other end.

"Listen baby, I'm sorry. It must have slipped my mind to tell you. There's someone I want you to meet. He's a friend of mine. I said we would meet him at Benny's at eight o'clock."

Stephanie closed her eyes and shook her head at the crappy timing. "But Shawn, I wanted it to just be us tonight. I wanted to talk to you."

"I'm sorry Stephanie and I'll make it up to you, I promise. It will be just you and me for the rest of the weekend. How does that sound?"

Like crap, she thought but she couldn't say that to Shawn. She would have to try and just be patient and talk to him after they got back home tonight. She reckoned a few hours weren't going to make much of a difference anyway. Raking her fingers through her hair, she slowly paced the carpet. "Okay, I'll see you at Benny's. Just don't be late. I don't fancy talking to a total stranger all by myself."

But as she hung up, Stephanie realised she wouldn't even know who this friend was anyway. She didn't know what he looked like. She'd rarely even heard Shawn talk about him although he may mentioned a friend he had grown up with once or twice but he had never gone into any detail about him. Stephanie just hoped they wouldn't be with him for long. She needed to sort things out with Shawn and it had to be tonight before the whole thing drove her absolutely crazy.

An hour or so later Stephanie was walking through the crowded restaurant, glancing around looking for Shawn. This place was always busy on a Friday night and tonight was definitely no exception. The tables were absolutely packed and she even banged into a few shoulders as she crossed the room. As she made her way towards the small bar, she felt a tap on her shoulder and she turned round to see Shawn smiling at her.

"Hi honey. It's good to see you."

He pulled her into a hug and Stephanie immediately felt the knot of guilt in her chest. However, she quickly pushed it aside deciding to pretend everything between them was absolutely fine at least for the next few hours. "It's good to see you too." she replied as she looked around the bar. "Is your friend here yet?"

Shawn nodded. "Yeah, he's just at the bar. He decided to buy a bottle of champagne."

She wrinkled her nose in curiosity. "What's the occasion? Old friends getting together again?"

"Well that plus the fact I've asked him to be my best man at our wedding."

Stephanie smiled ignoring the wave of nausea in her stomach. God she felt like such a bitch. This was simply horrible having to pretend she was happy about a wedding when in actual fact she was about to call it off and break his heart. She just wished tonight would hurry up and end and she could get this whole thing over and done with. It was killing her to keep up the pretence.

Just then someone banged against her and her bag spilled to the floor. As she cursed the idiot, she bent over to pick up the few contents that were scattered in front of her. She heard Shawn's voice above her as he greeted his friend.

"There's someone I'd like you to meet once she's done picking up stuff from the floor."

She heard his friend's laughter above the low sound of the music as she picked up the packet of tissues and placed them in her bag. As she straightened up, Stephanie brushed the dust from the leg of her jeans as she heard Shawn start the introductions.

"Paul, I would like you to meet Stephanie."

As she glanced up at the man Shawn had introduced her to, her mouth parted with her stunned amazement as she saw the familiar long blonde hair and recognised the piercing brown eyes staring back at her. Her lips trembled as she watched the frozen smile set on his face. Her heart pounded as she waited for his reaction but it never came. She could only stand there in shock as he looked at her indifferently and offered his hand for her to shake.

"It's nice to finally meet you Stephanie."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

_Present Day_

The dull persistent banging disturbed him from his restless slumber. Paul slowly began to come round as he stirred on the sofa. His big hand lifted to rub at his tired eyes as he pushed himself to his feet and his bare feet padded across the polished floor as he stumbled across the room. His long fingers blindly fumbled with the locks of the front door snarling angrily as the person on the other side insisted on trying to beat his house down.

"Stop the banging damn it!" he called out. "I'll just be a second."

He finally turned the mortar lock and when Paul opened the door, he felt his eyes screw into slits as they came into contact with the bright daylight outside. As they gradually adjusted to the morning sun, he saw his friend looking at him in disbelief. In fact Kevin was visibly frowning and shaking his head as he sadly surveyed the man standing in front of him. Paul was in a complete state. His blonde hair looked like it hadn't been washed in a week and hung limply around his shoulders. His eyes were red and bloodshot and his face looked extremely pale. Even the jeans and black shirt he wore were a crumpled mess which led him to the conclusion that Paul had obviously been sleeping in them for God knows how long.

"You look a fucking mess." Kevin told him matter of factly.

"It's nice to see you too man." Paul replied smiling at him sarcastically. "So, are you coming in or are you just going to stand there with that ugly fucking look on your face?"

Kevin followed Paul into the house, the door clicking shut behind him. His blue eyes went wide in disbelief as he entered the spacious living room just off the hallway. The place was an absolute tip and that was putting it kindly. There were empty bottles of beer and liquor strewn across the table and floor along with dirty plates, glasses and foil takeout cartons. There were also items of clothing thrown across the back of the sofa. Kevin ran his fingers through his hair suddenly glad he had made the trip here. He had been right to be worried about Paul and his lack of phone calls or any form of communication lately. This just wasn't like him at all to be like this. The guy was usually a neat freak and anytime he had visited, the place was always tidy and immaculate to the point he sometime wondered if Paul actually lived in it at all. Now it resembled a dump and the person living in it wasn't faring any better either. Paul was hung over and stunk of alcohol and not from a one night binge either. This had obviously been going on for a while and something was seriously up to make him act this way. As a friend, it was up to him to listen and try and help him. God knows Paul had been there for him often enough and it was time for him to return the favour. Glancing around the dimly lit room, Kevin promptly walked over to the window pulling open the blinds much to Paul's dismay.

"Hey man, would you leave them closed!" he protested.

Kevin ignored him and turned round to see Paul sprawled across the sofa, his big hand lifted across his face shielding his eyes from the light that now streamed through the room. He sighed as he walked over to the empty chair beside him and sat down tossing the cream coloured cushion to the side.

"So, how long are you planning to keep this up?"

Paul brought his hand down and glared at him for a few seconds before eventually lifting his shoulder in a shrug. "I had a few drinks last night. What's the problem with that?"

Kevin narrowed his eyes and shook his head in disbelief. "Don't bullshit me Paul. This has been going on for longer than one night. Look at this place man and look at you! You look like shit!"

His disbelief turned to frustration as the only response he got from Paul was a sigh as he stared blankly at the wall straight ahead.

"Look Paul, I'm here because I'm worried about you and by the looks of things I have every right to be. You won't answer my calls and no-one has heard from you or seen you in a week. I call your office and they tell me you've called in sick. I call your parents and they haven't heard from you since you left for the wedding. What the hell is going on?"

Paul swallowed thickly and continued to focus on the wall as he blocked out Kevin's tirade. The truth of the matter was he just didn't want to talk about this. He couldn't because talking about it would make it all terribly real and he would have to acknowledge the fact that Stephanie was no longer a part of his life. Not that she ever had been, not really. Still, it didn't make the pain any less real or his heart any less broken. Sighing heavily, he raked his fingers through his limp blonde strands ignoring the slight pounding in his temples.

"There's something serious going on in your life Paul and I'm not leaving here until I find out what it is. Is it work?"

Paul licked his dry lips and slowly turned round to look at Kevin. He could see the concerned expression on his friend's face but he chose to deliberately ignore it and pushed himself up from the sofa, Ignoring the wave of nausea in his stomach, he made his way to the kitchen heading straight to the refrigerator and taking out a couple of bottles of beer. As he searched the counter for the discarded bottle opener, he heard Kevin walk in behind him.

"It's a bit early in the morning to start drinking don't you think?"

Paul's fingers clutched the discovered bottle opener and pressing down on the lid, he opened the beer and tossed the metal top to the counter where it bounced to a stop. He turned around to face Kevin and held the drink out to him. "Do you want one or do you not?"

His friend sighed and accepted the bottle from him. "I might as well. It looks like I'm going to be here for a while."

Paul opened the other bottle before leaning back against the kitchen counter and taking a mouthful of the cold drink. He felt himself grimace as he tasted the beer and his stomach began to churn madly in protest. His hangover was beginning to kick in but a few more of these and he would soon forget all about it just like he would forget all about Stephanie. Or at least he would eventually. Shifting his feet, Paul lifted his head to see Kevin standing still just watching him.

"So, has beer been a permanent fixture on your breakfast menu lately?"

Paul heard the obvious disapproval in his voice and he shook his head angrily. "Look Kev, get off my case. I'm a big boy now. I can handle it."

He shook his head sadly. "No Paul, you can't handle it. I mean, look at the state of you, man. There's something going on with you that you obviously can't deal with and that's why you've probably been drunk of your ass for God knows how long. Well, I'm here to tell you now that drinking won't solve all your problems and I should know. I've been there, remember?"

Kevin sighed as Paul turned away defiantly taking another mouthful of his beer. Deep down his heart went out to him, sensing what he must be going through. Personally, he had been a total wreck when his wife had left him two years ago. She had been seeing a younger guy for months behind his back and the first he knew about it was when he came home one day to find all her clothes and his money gone. He had drowned his sorrows by hitting the bottle and it had taken a lot of support from Paul and Shawn to get him through it and stop the drinking. Now it was up to him to support his friend and he would be here for as long as it took to get through to Paul and sort out whatever it was that was troubling him. In the meantime, he would try and be patient and just be here for him. Pushing him wasn't going to help anyone anyway especially someone as stubborn as Paul. Taking a sip from his beer, Kevin lifted his shoulder in a shrug.

"Look, you obviously don't want to talk right now and that's fine. But I'm sure you won't mind me hanging around for a few days now that I've travelled all the way from Miami to see you."

Paul lifted his head and offered him a small smile. "What about work?"

"I'm sure the nightclub will manage fine without me for a while. Anyway, I've arranged for Phil to cover for me."

He nodded as Kevin watched him carefully.

"Listen, if I promise not to hassle you about whatever it is that's bugging you right now, will you do me a favour?"

Paul pressed his lips together as he shrugged. "I guess so if it means you getting off my case."

His friend playfully pushed his arm. "Go and take a shower and change those clothes. You look like shit."

Despite himself, Paul chuckled at his request. Deep down, he knew Kevin was right. He couldn't remember the last time he had washed or worn clean clothes. His personal hygiene hadn't exactly been on his list of priorities. It hadn't mattered; then again nothing really seemed to matter. Not any more. Paul felt that familiar ache in his chest and lifted his bottle to his lips, finishing his beer in a few quick gulps before smacking his lips together and placing it down on the counter.

"I'm going to take a shower now. Will you be alright while I'm gone?" he asked.

"Yeah. If I need anything, I'll just have a look for it on your living room floor. That's where you seem to keep everything nowadays."

"You're real funny, man."

Paul smirked slapping him on his shoulder as he walked past him out of the kitchen.

Kevin sighed as he took another drink from his beer before setting it down on the table. He wished he could figure out what the hell was bothering Paul and why he was so reluctant to talk about it. His friend was broken up and something had to be troubling him big time. At least he had made a start and got him to clean himself up. Maybe in time he'd be able to get him to open up and talk about whatever it was that was bothering him but for now he'd settle for cleaning up the mess around this place starting with the living room. It was time for Paul to stop wallowing and get his life back in order and he was the very guy to make it happen.

* * *

Paul tried to ignore the nausea he felt as he stood underneath the hot water. He closed his eyes and began to wonder what day it was and if he needed to call in sick to work again. The past week had been a complete blur to him and the days had seemed to merge into one another endlessly as all he did was drink and sleep and try to forget. Paul swallowed thickly as the water cascaded over his chest and the memory of the last night he had spent with Stephanie haunted his thoughts. It was so fresh and clear in his mind and it hurt him every time he recalled that night; the night they had made love until dawn and the night they had said their final goodbyes to one another. Stephanie had married Shawn the very next day and in turn forcing Paul to shut her and his friend out of his life completely. And although he had respected her decision at the time and even understood it, he was still so angry that at times he couldn't stand still. It twisted his stomach into little tight knots and he knew his anger wasn't really directed at Stephanie. His anger was mostly directed towards himself and his actions. The truth was he hadn't had the guts to stand up to Shawn and tell him that he was in love with Stephanie. Instead he had taken the coward's way out and had let her convince him that they couldn't hurt Shawn by taking away two of the most important people in his life.

But what Stephanie hadn't realised was that he had been willing to lose Shawn as a friend to be with her. He knew that was completely selfish on his part but he couldn't help it. He had fallen for Stephanie so hard and so fast that it had taken his breath away. He loved her completely and without question. He had never felt so deeply about anyone in his life and he didn't expect to again. But the one thing that had stopped him from being honest in the end was Stephanie. She had been so adamant about not hurting Shawn and going through with the wedding so much so that he had started to think her feelings for him weren't as strong as she had led him to believe. How could they be? She was so worried about Shawn that not once did she ever think about how much she was hurting him with her decision. She was quite prepared to shatter his heart into pieces and to hell with the consequences.

Feeling his pain start to bubble to the surface again, Paul turned off the shower and grabbed the white fluffy towel. He quickly dried himself off and as he felt that empty ache in his heart he knew this was why he had spent every day drinking. It numbed his memories and his heart and he didn't have to spend every waking minute of every day missing Stephanie and longing for her touch or her kiss. He could forget just how much he needed her or how badly thoughts of her consumed him.

Paul made his way into his bedroom and refusing to dwell on her one second longer, he violently tugged on a pair of clean jeans and a white cotton polo shirt. He flicked his damp blonde strands over the collar as he descended the ornate wooden staircase. As he got closer to the bottom steps, he heard the sound of Kevin's voice drift through from the living room. He stopped in his tracks, his anger building as he listened in to the conversation.

"He won't tell me what's going on and he's a total mess. You should see him. I just hope I can get to the bottom of what's bothering him."

Paul cleared his throat and getting his friend's attention, his brown eyes glared back at him.

"Look, I'd better go. I'll see you when you get back." said Kevin.

He ended the call as Paul crossed the freshly tidied living room.

"So, you obviously feel the need to tell everyone about my problems." he snarled.

"That wasn't just anyone Paul. It was Shawn."

Paul scowled feeling his stomach twist at the mention of his name. "The guy's on his honeymoon for Christ sakes! Doesn't he have anything better to do with his time than check up on me?"

"He's worried about you Paul. We all are. Anyway, it was Stephanie's idea to call me and see how you were."

Kevin noticed Paul's face instantly fall at the mention of Stephanie's name and watched in silence as he disappeared into the kitchen. He heard a cupboard door slam shut before he saw him re-emerge with a whisky bottle and a glass in his hand. Paul was silent as he sat down on the sofa and began to pour the amber liquid into the empty glass. Kevin ran his hands through his hair and sighed before walking over to where he was sitting.

"Paul, I don't think you should be drinking that, do you?"

He said nothing and simply sneered at Kevin before taking the glass and downing the whisky in one go. He then stood picking up the bottle and his bare feet padded towards the stairs stopping for a moment as his foot reached the bottom step. His expression was blank as he turned round to face his friend. "Thanks for tidying up but you really shouldn't have bothered."

He then disappeared up the staircase and Kevin heard the banging of the bedroom door echoed throughout the house as it slammed shut behind him.

* * *

Stephanie sat out on the balcony, her face illuminated by the full moon in the sky as she stared out towards the ocean. Everything was quiet and peaceful and the only noise was the waves as they crashed upon the shore. Usually she found them calm and extremely soothing but tonight they only made her even more restless than she already was. All night she had been tossing and turning unable to sleep. Eventually she had given up on getting any rest and tried not to disturb Shawn as she put on her robe and came outside just to think and try and clear her head.

Sighing softly into the balmy breeze, Stephanie rubbed at her tired eyes knowing the reason behind her insomnia. Paul. He was hurting and it was all her fault. When she had overheard Shawn's conversation with Kevin earlier on, she had felt absolutely sick to her stomach. It killed her to know he was hurting. Up until that point, she had managed to convince herself that she had done the right thing for everyone involved by getting married to Shawn. She hadn't broken his heart and she hadn't destroyed his friendship with Paul. Yet, she had been so focused on doing what was best for her husband that she hadn't thought about Paul would be going through. She hadn't even considered the fact she might be breaking his heart too and not thinking about his feelings hadn't been intentional. It had just been easier not to think about it because thinking of Paul just cut her up inside. God, she missed him and how she wished she could turn back the clock.

Shifting in her chair, Stephanie felt the sadness creep into her heart. Her vacation had given her a lot of time to think over the past week and after a lot of soul searching, she could now admit to herself that her decision to marry Shawn had been driven mainly by fear. Every time she had thought about not going ahead with the wedding, she had felt terrified. She knew she couldn't handle seeing the pain and anger her actions would have caused and it had just been easier to go through with it. She just didn't have the guts to make the decision she knew she should have made. She should have called off the wedding. She should have followed her heart and chosen to be with Paul.

Pushing back the hot lump in her throat, Stephanie jumped slightly startled as she felt Shawn's hand on her shoulder and she placed her hand to her chest as she caught her breath.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." smiled Shawn apologetically. "Why don't you come back to bed? It's cold outside."

Stephanie nodded and stood up from her chair following Shawn as he walked back into the bedroom. She took off her robe as she heard him slide the window shut and crawled into bed deliberately turning on her side facing away from Shawn and pulling the covers to her chin as he got in next to her. Her body automatically stiffened as she felt his lips kiss the exposed skin on her neck.

"Not now Shawn. I've got a headache." she told him.

She heard him sigh heavily before he moved away and lay back down on the bed. Stephanie tried to ignore the knot of guilt in her chest. She knew she wasn't being fair by pushing him away but she couldn't help herself. After all how could she be intimate with her husband when all she wanted was to be in the arms of his best friend? God, she'd made such a horrible mess of everything but there was no turning back. Not now. All she could do was try to find some way of living with her choices.

She simply had to find a way to survive without Paul.

* * *

Thousands of miles away in Paul's home, Kevin's eyes fluttered open. He smacked his lips together and lifted his head from the cushion on the sofa. As he gazed around the empty living area, he realised that he must have fallen asleep watching television while he waited on Paul to emerge from his room. He sat up and stretched his arms above his head, squinting his eyes in the direction of the digital clock displayed on the dvd player. They widened with disbelief when he saw it was a little after two in the morning meaning he had been out cold for at least the last five hours. As he looked towards the stairs, he contemplated checking on Paul. He hadn't come out of his bedroom all day and had preferred to hide himself away no doubt drinking himself into another drunken stupor. Kevin stood up and sighed as he switched off the television. As he ran his hand through his hair, he wondered what he could do to make Paul open up and tell him what was bothering him. He climbed the stairs, his heavy footsteps lightly creaking on the wood and he crossed the hallway to stand outside Paul's bedroom. There was nothing but silence coming from the other side but Kevin decided to knock on the door first. Hearing no reply, he still turned the handle and entered.

The room was in a partial blanket of darkness. The only light was the dim white hue from the street lights outside as they shone through the cracks of the slatted blinds on the window. Kevin could make out Paul's body fully clothed and sprawled across the bed. He walked towards the nightstand and switched on the bed side lamp. As his eyes adjusted to the soft glow bathing the room, he noticed the empty bottle and glass that lay on the carpet at the side of the bed. He bent down and picked them up from the floor placing them on the nightstand. Just then Paul groaned rolled over onto his back. His blonde strands fanned across the pillows as his gentle deep breathing filled the room. The guy was out cold and it was little wonder. Paul had consumed the entire bottle of whisky never mind what else had been lingering in his system.

Kevin sighed heavily as he decided that he wasn't going to pussyfoot around his friend any longer. Tomorrow morning he was going to confront Paul and he was going to make him talk about whatever it was that was bothering him. This had gone on for long enough. The guy was clearly on some self-destruct mode and it had to stop.

Kevin reached over and switched off the lamp again. He hovered by the bed for a second or two before walking to the door. His hand had just gripped the handle and he was about to pull it shut he heard Paul murmur something in his sleep. As he strained to listen to him, Kevin heard him say her name once more.

"Steph. Stephanie."

His brow wrinkled with his confusion wondering why the hell Paul would be calling out her name. They barely knew one another from what he could gather but now the guy was dreaming about her.

As Kevin backed away towards the door, he then remembered how Paul's face had fallen the second he had mentioned that Stephanie had wanted Shawn to call him this morning. It had clearly rattled him so much so he had gone for the whisky bottle and disappeared for the rest of the day getting totally trashed. It hadn't made a lot of sense at the time but now his reasons were becoming much clearer. Reasons that gave Kevin an uneasy feeling deep in the pit of his stomach as he began to realise that Stephanie just might be the reason why Paul was falling apart.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Paul's eyes slowly fluttered open as he gradually came to. They immediately began to burn in the bright morning sunlight that poured through his open blind so he snapped them shut again and the mattress creaked lightly under his weight as he rolled over to his side. He immediately felt the pounding in his temples and the nauseous churning in his stomach and his low groan echoed in the silent bedroom as he threw his arm over his head. He felt like total crap and knew that he was going to have the hangover from hell today. He always did every single time he touched whisky and as usual it had left that foul, disgusting taste in his mouth. His mind immediately cried out for water but he wasn't sure he had the strength to move. God knows why he did this to himself. But as an image of her face quickly flashed through his mind, Paul knew the reason why. It was Stephanie. It was always Stephanie.

His heavy sigh reflected the heaviness in his heart as his mind recalled the events from yesterday in particular Shawn calling to check up on him because apparently Stephanie had asked him to. Paul turned his head to bury his face in his pillow as he wondered why she was pretending to give a damn about him even now. She hadn't given him a second thought when she'd gone ahead and married Shawn ripping his heart in two in the process. Had she cared about them then? Had she hell and he was struggling to believe she cared about him now!

Suddenly Paul sat up with a jolt and he quickly stumbled to the bathroom just in time to lean over and throw up into the toilet bowl. His retching hurt his throat and once his stomach was empty, he sat on the floor and slumped weakly against the wall. His fingers threaded through his long blonde strands as he placed his head in his hands and drew his knees to his chest. His head was spinning and his throat burned. As Paul sat in despair he didn't see Kevin appear in the doorway and he jumped slightly startled when he heard his voice.

"It's no wonder you're in a state."

Paul slowly lifted his head. His bloodshot eyes glared in his friend's direction. "Save me the lecture, would you?" he said thickly. "I'm not in the mood."

Kevin shook his head as he walked across and sat down on the edge of the bath tub. He passed him the tall glass of water he held in his hand along with two aspirin. "Here. I thought you might need these."

Paul nodded his thanks as his slightly shaky hands accepted them and he placed the aspirin in his mouth before taking a large mouthful of the cool liquid. It instantly soothed his hot throat as he gulped it down wiping his mouth with the back of his hand when he was done. He could feel Kevin watching him. His brown eyes narrowed as he placed the empty glass down next to him. "What?" he scowled.

Kevin shook his head as he rubbed the stubble on his chin. "Look at you. Paul, I'm worried about you. Can't you see what a mess you're in right now?"

He shook his head in annoyance as he pushed himself off the floor and stood up. His head continued to spin as he grabbed his toothbrush from the side of the sink.

"You can try and ignore me all you want you know but I'm not going away until I get to the bottom of what's going on with you. You'll quickly find out my friend that you're not the only one who can be a total stubborn bastard around here."

Paul glanced in the mirror and watched as Kevin stood up and walked out of the en-suite bathroom. He felt a pang of guilt knowing he was only trying to be a friend to him. Kevin only wanted to try and help him out but the fact was no-one could help him. Not Kevin, not anyone. Not this time.

Paul's long fingers turned on the faucet as he began to brush his teeth. Fifteen minutes later he was walking into the kitchen where his stomach churned in protest at the strong smell of the freshly brewed coffee. His big hand rubbed his stomach as he shuffled across to the breakfast bar.

"I've made some coffee. Do you want some?" asked Kevin who was pouring a cup at the counter.

Paul grimaced and he pulled out a stool and sat down. "No thanks. I couldn't face it."

Kevin shook his head as he took in the awful state his friend was in. Quite frankly he looked like death warmed up. Paul never could hold his liquor, especially not when it came to spirits. There were dark rings under his heavy eyes, a stark contrast to the paleness of his skin but at least it looked like he had showered and changed into some clean clothes. It was a definite improvement on yesterday. Now all he had to do was try and sort out the rest of his sorry ass. "You want some breakfast?" he asked him.

Paul winced as he held his hand up in protest. "No. I couldn't. Really."

"It's just as well. There's damn all to eat around here. It looks like you've been sticking to a strict liquid diet lately."

He shook his head weakly before placing his forearms on the marble counter and resting his forehead there closing his eyes. Paul felt his temples throb and his stomach churn listlessly.

"Are you going to be okay on your own for a while I go and stock up on some food?"

Paul lifted his head slightly flashing him a wry, sarcastic smile. "Yes Mom."

Kevin snorted as he placed his coffee cup in the sink and walking towards the door, he glanced back round. "When I come back you're going to eat something and then afterwards you're going to talk and don't think for one second you're getting out of it."

He was out of the door before Paul could even summon a protest. Sighing heavily, he placed his head in his hands knowing Kevin was wasting his time. He wasn't up for eating anything and he sure as hell wasn't going to talk. His friend would just have to get the message and then hopefully he'd leave him in peace.

Just then the phone rang out, startling him for the second time that morning. Paul groaned thickly as the loud shrilling made his headache worse if that was even remotely possible. He really wasn't up to talking to anyone right now. Then again, it could be his mother for like the millionth time. She had been calling constantly the last couple of days leaving him so many messages he had switched the damn machine off. But he knew she would be worried and if he didn't talk to her soon he'd have her to contend with as well as Kevin and that was something he definitely couldn't handle. It was bad enough having one of them here and in his face. As the phone continued to ring out, Paul realised whoever it was, they weren't giving up until he had answered. He grudgingly rose to his feet and crossed the short distance to pick up. "Hello?"

He heard nothing but the crackling silence on the other end and was about to hang up when her soft tone echoed down the line.

"Paul, are you still there?"

The sound of her voice momentarily stunned him. Stephanie. He couldn't believe she was calling him here. And why now? What was she trying to do to him? Kill him here? Paul let out a slow breath as his anger quickly bubbled to the surface. It was like some sick game she was playing with him. Wasn't breaking his heart enough for her? Now she had to go and pretend that she actually gave a damn about him. Well Stephanie could go to straight to hell. She'd made her choice and she'd been more than perfectly clear about it. A choice that meant she had no right to try and be a part of his life. Not any more. Without saying a word, Paul simply hung up.

His brown eyes stared in disbelief at the receiver and as he slowly brought his hand away, he realised his fingers were actually trembling. He clenched them together angry that her call had affected him so badly. But that was the way it had been ever since Stephanie had picked someone else. He was angry. He was sad. Inside, he was completely broken.

Feeling that familiar gut twisting pain he felt every single time he thought of her, Paul found himself craving the one thing that would take the pain away. The only thing that ever helped him forget her.

Paul opened the refrigerator door but his brow furrowed with his scowl when he saw it was empty. The six pack of beer was gone; his quart of vodka too. Shaking his head, Paul snarled in anger as he slammed the door over. Kevin obviously thought he was being a smart ass by getting rid of the alcohol. Well, he could go screw himself. If he couldn't get a drink here, he'd just go and get one somewhere else.

Paul defiantly marched through the living room and grabbing his jacket from the stand on his way out, he stormed out the door banging it shut behind him.

He was completely unaware that thousands of miles away, Stephanie was sobbing silently as her heart broke in two. Lying huddled on her bed, her shoulders shook with her tears as she mentally berated herself for calling Paul. She knew it had been a bad idea to call but she just couldn't help herself. He was all she could think about lately. He was constantly on her mind and she had just wanted to hear his voice one more time and check he was okay. She had been so worried about him since Shawn's phone call yesterday and she had every right to be judging from the way he hung up on her. Paul was far from alright. The fact he couldn't even talk to her told her that much and it was all her fault. God knows she hadn't meant to hurt him. She loved him so much. Being without him broke her heart.

Just then she heard the movement in the bathroom and she quickly jumped off the bed and wiped at her eyes. She couldn't let Shawn see her upset like this. It would make him suspicious and after her rejecting his advances last night and again this morning, it wouldn't take him long to figure out that something was going on with her. God, the last thing she could do was even let him guess at the truth.

Letting out a shaky breath, Stephanie forced a happy smile on her face as he walked across the room. "Did you enjoy your shower?" she asked him.

Shawn nodded as he grinned at her. "I would have enjoyed it more though if you had been there."

He wrapped his arms around her burying his face in her neck. Stephanie felt her body stiffen as he placed soft kisses on her throat and wriggled free of his embrace ignoring the obvious look of disappointment on her husband's face.

"Come on. Let's get ready and head to the beach. We'll miss the best of the sun if we stay in here."

Shawn sighed as he watched Stephanie start to pull on her sandals. He reluctantly began to dress himself as he wondered what was troubling his wife. Something was going on with her especially in the last couple of days. Of course, she kept trying to cover it up but he wasn't stupid and while he knew he should try and get to the bottom of it, he also didn't want an argument with her and spoil their honeymoon. Maybe it was something in the air right now because Stephanie wasn't the only one who was acting weird nowadays. Something was bugging Paul too and he was starting to feel worried especially after his conversation with Kevin yesterday. Paul sounded like he was a complete mess and unfortunately there was nothing he could do about it.

Shawn rolled his lips thoughtfully as he pulled back his hair. Maybe that was the problem. Maybe his worrying about Paul all the time was beginning to piss Stephanie off. After all, they were on their honeymoon and he should be spending his time focusing on her and not fretting after his best friend. Maybe he should just let Kevin worry about Paul at least until he got back home and in the meantime concentrate on his wife and make the most of this time together. God knows when they got back to New York their time would be limited to dinners after work and the odd weekend that he wasn't at the gym which made him want to treasure this time they did have together even more.

As Shawn finished getting ready, he noticed Stephanie standing at the door waiting on him. He gave her a smile as he grabbed his bag and followed her out of their apartment. He took her hand as they began to walk towards the beach. Half way there, he suddenly stopped and pulled her towards him. He placed his arms around her waist and kissed her softly. "I love you." he said tenderly.

"Me too." Stephanie told him quickly before she broke their embrace and continued to walk. Shawn followed on slowly behind her watching her with a sad and worried expression on his face.

* * *

Kevin was watching television when Paul eventually stumbled through the door. He wasn't the least bit surprised to see his friend completely trashed yet again. He guessed the nearest bar was where Paul had disappeared to after he had returned to find him gone almost eight hours ago. By all accounts it was amazing that he was actually still standing. It just left him to wonder though what had caused him to get in this state this time. Although if he was being honest, deep down he reckoned it would be a pretty safe bet it had something to do with Stephanie. He had to admit he was still reeling after discovering she was involved somehow. He just didn't know how she was and why.

"You're still here then." slurred Paul as his heavy frame collapsed on the sofa. He snorted with amusement as he saw his friend glare back disapprovingly at him. "What's wrong Kev? Have I stayed out past my bedtime?"

Kevin shook his head as he sat forward in his chair smelling the strong scent of alcohol that now lingered in the room. "You're not even funny Lev. Where the hell have you been, man? I've been worried about you."

"Out." Paul told him simply as he pushed himself to his feet. He slightly wobbled before regaining his balance to walk round the back of the sofa. Kevin quickly made his move stopping him in his tracks.

"So what caused you to get smashed this time?"

Paul lifted his left shoulder in a shrug and his brown eyes blinked heavily as they stared back at his friend.

"No reason. I just felt like a drink and if some asshole hadn't thought he was being smart by getting rid of the bottles I had in my house, I wouldn't have had to go elsewhere to have one."

Kevin shook his head in disbelief. "If you really expect me to believe that you're in this state for no reason then you're more stupid than I thought. How about I take a guess at the real reason behind you drinking yourself into oblivion?"

Paul sighed as he threw his hands dramatically in the air. "Go ahead. Waste your time and mine."

Kevin raked his hand through his hair and began to pace back and forwards for a minute as he decided whether to broach the subject or not. God knows it was going to open a whole can of worms and he wasn't sure he was ready for it. Like that old saying went ignorance was bliss and all that.

But as Kevin turned his head and looked at Paul, he realised his ignorance wasn't doing his friend any good. The guy was a drunken mess and it was up to him to snap him out of it and if that meant confronting Paul with the truth then so be it. Anything had to be better than watching the guy he loved like a brother press the self destruct button on his life. He just hoped they could survive the fallout because he couldn't shake the feeling things were about to get ugly. Really fucking ugly.

"So come on man. What's the diagnosis?" Paul chuckled.

His amused smirk annoyed Kevin and he shook his head. He was looking forward to wiping that smirk right off his face the second he mentioned her. Licking his lips, Kevin narrowed his eyes in his direction.

"I got one word for you. Stephanie."

That one word got the reaction he was expecting. Paul's face fell as soon as her name had left his lips but he tried his best to cover it up by forcing a smile and shrugging his shoulders in an attempt to act nonchalant.

"What's she got to do with anything?" he asked.

"Don't bullshit me Paul." Kevin told him. "I know she's behind all of this. I just need you to tell me how the hell she is involved."

"You don't know what you're talking about and I don't have to listen to this." Paul replied as he pushed himself off the sofa and tried to walk in the direction of the stairs. However, he was unsteady on his feet and Kevin grabbed him by the arm before he got very far.

"Oh no, you don't. You're not walking away this time buddy."

Kevin pushed him to the wall by the large sash window and pinned him up by his massive shoulders. His blue eyes stared at Paul menacingly who tried to break free from his grasp but Kevin had a tight grip on him and knew he couldn't put up much of a fight in the state he was in. His legs felt like jelly and his head was starting to spin. After a couple more futile attempts Paul eventually gave in and stood still. Kevin looked him dead in the eye.

"Now you tell me what the hell is going on before I have to force it out of you."

"There's nothing going on so why don't you just fuck off and leave me alone." Paul snarled angrily.

Kevin shook his head. "That's not going to happen, pal. So why don't you save us a whole lot of bother here and just tell me the god damn truth."

"Because there's nothing for me to tell you man! Not anymore."

All the fight seemed to leave his body as his limited confession hung between them. Paul dropped his head unable to look his friend in the eye. Kevin released his grip on him and watched him slump down the wall and to the floor holding his head in his hands. His face was hidden by the curtain of long blonde hair and Kevin sighed and sat down beside Paul feeling the anxious knots twist in his stomach. He was starting to get a really bad feeling about all of this. Something had definitely happened between Paul and Stephanie that much was obvious to him. He just needed to figure out what on earth it was. Clearing his throat, his voice was much calmer as he nudged Paul with his shoulder to get his attention.

"Just tell me what's going on, buddy. I promise to listen and try to understand."

Paul eventually lifted his head, shaking it slowly as his heavy brown eyes stared back at him. "You won't understand. You'll hate my guts."

"Paul, we're best friends. No matter what you've done I'm not going to judge you. I just want to help you."

"Yeah? Well trust me you won't want to help me once you know what I've done."

"Try me."

Paul threw his hands up in the air and conceded defeat. "Hey why the hell not! I mean, it's not like my life can get any worse than it is, right?"

He let out a shaky breath as he leant his head back against the wall dropping his arms to his sides. His facial expression flickered with his sadness as he began to tell his story.

"Remember that girl I told you about, the one I met last month on my trip to Boston. The girl I told you I was pretty much head over heels in love with."

Kevin nodded.

"Well, see…..that girl was Stephanie."

Paul shifted his head on the wall and saw the stunned look of disbelief on Kevin's face. He knew his friend was struggling to process the fact that he loved his best friend's wife. For a moment neither one of them said a word as they sat there alone with their thoughts until eventually Kevin broke the silence.

"When did you find out that's who she was?"

Paul licked his lips as he looked straight ahead, his heart beating faster at just the simple thought of her and his blood rushing with the mixture of alcohol and his pent-up emotion. "It was about two weeks before the wedding. Shawn introduced us."

"And didn't he wonder how you both knew each other?"

Paul slowly shook his head as he tilted it to peer in Kevin's direction. "He didn't know. When I saw her standing there I pretended I didn't know who she was."

Kevin furrowed his brow in confusion. "Why would you do that? Didn't Stephanie say anything?"

Paul let out a wry chuckle at his question and his big hand lifted to rub at his face. "You would think she would, wouldn't you? But then again, honesty doesn't seem to be her strong point. Do you know she hadn't even told me she was involved with someone let alone engaged to him?"

His friend shook his head in disbelief, unable to take it all in. He had a lot of time for Stephanie and couldn't believe what she had been involved in. Not only had she hurt Paul, she had screwed around on Shawn too. It just didn't sound like her. Not the Stephanie he knew anyways.

"You know I should have known it was too good to be true." continued Paul stretching his left leg out in front of him as he gazed down at the polished wooden floor. "I mean after all these years being alone and never finding that special someone, I finally meet this amazing woman who was so incredible and so beautiful that she blew me away from the first moment I saw her. I fell in love with her, Kev and I honestly believed she felt the same way about me. Stephanie changed what I wanted in my life. I found myself imagining what it would be like to be married. One time I even thought about kids."

Kevin laid his hand on his shoulder and squeezed it reassuringly. "I'm sorry, man."

Paul shook his head and turned to him. "Save the sympathy big man. I haven't told you the rest. See once I knew who she was, I tried my hardest to stay away. I really did. I mean, Shawn's my friend. I would never do anything to intentionally hurt him. But Stephanie came to my hotel room on the Sunday morning that weekend and basically we talked and she apologised to me. Basically, she thought there was no point in telling me about Shawn. Once she was home, she was going to call off the wedding and finish things with him to be with me. But of course that never happened because when she got back Shawn was away trying to sort out that insurance job in San Fransisco."

"I remember that. He was gone for like a week."

"Yeah well he came back the night he had arranged to meet me. Stephanie never had a chance to talk to him. He came to Benny's straight from the airport."

Kevin chewed his lip thoughtfully before looking at Paul. "But if she was so intent on calling off the wedding, what changed? I mean, it's not as if you let the cat out of the bag by saying you knew who she was. She was in the clear."

Paul lifted his shoulder in a shrug. "I guess once she realised I was Shawn's best friend, she freaked. She kept telling me that she couldn't hurt him by taking away two of the most important people in her life. She didn't want to be the one to ruin the friendship Shawn and I had." He sighed raking his fingers through his messy blonde strands. "But what she doesn't realise is that she has anyway. Things will never be the same between us. They can't."

"You didn't know who she was Paul. You can't blame yourself for that."

"But I knew who she was when I made love to her right up until the night before her wedding."

Kevin's eyes went wide as he quickly rose to his feet and his nostrils flared with his anger as he towered over Paul. "What the fuck were you playing at, man? Shawn is supposed to be your best friend. You were his best man at his wedding for Christ sakes!"

"Don't you think I already know that?" he shouted. "Of course I fucking do! But I was in love with her and I couldn't help myself. I couldn't stay away."

"You could have if you tried hard enough."

Paul pushed himself up the wall and to his feet and his brown eyes flashed with his own anger as he chuckled ruefully. "Yeah, just like you managed to stay away from your wife after she left you."

Kevin snarled. "That's different and you know it. I still loved her."

Paul threw his hands in the air. "So why is it any different for me? I still loved Stephanie."

"Yeah but she was marrying your best friend!"

"I know! Believe me, I know!" he cried before turning away and sighing heavily as he raked his fingers through his hair.

"So, are you planning on continuing your little affair once Stephanie comes back from her honeymoon?"

Paul spun on his heel and glared at Kevin in disgust. "I'm not even going to justify that with an answer."

"Why? Is it because you're actually feeling a little bit guilty about screwing your best friend's wife?"

Paul shook his head in anger as he walked over and threw himself on the sofa. Kevin stood behind him not sure what to do. He felt so angry at what Paul and Stephanie had done to Shawn. He didn't know if he'd be able to keep his mouth shut and Paul had put him in one hell of an awkward position. Shifting his feet on the carpet, his mouth parted to say his piece until Paul's voice beat him into silence.

"Actually you'll probably be glad to know that I'm never going to see Shawn or Stephanie again. I made that promise to myself when I came back home but as you've seen over the last couple of days, I'm having a little trouble handling my decision."

He sighed and looked up as he saw Kevin sit down in the chair opposite him. His expression was solemn as he sat forward resting his forearms on his thighs.

"And now I suppose I'll have to deal with losing you too."

Kevin quickly shook his head. "Don't be stupid, man. Okay I might be angry right now and I might not approve of what you've done but you're my best friend Paul. That's not going to change."

Paul gave him a small tight smile before he looked away. He could feel the tears burn in the back of his throat as he thought about everything and what a mess his life had become. He was just so emotionally drained but he was determined not to cry. Not over her. If nothing else, he still had some fucking pride left.

"Look Paul, I know you're hurting right now but things will start to get better soon. You'll find a way to get past all this and move on and when you do, you'll change your mind about cutting out Shawn from your life."

Paul shook his head sadly resigned to the truth. "No, I won't. I can't look at him knowing that he's with her. I can't hear all about how happy they are together."

Kevin sighed hearing the melancholy and pain in his voice. It was obvious Paul was hurting badly and still very much in love with Stephanie. It was going to take a long time for him to get over this but he would make sure he was there for him. After all Paul had always been there when he needed him. He had never once let him down and it was time for him to return that favour.

Just then Paul stood up and began to walk towards the stairs. His hand gripped the banister as he turned round to look at Kevin. "I'm going to head up to bed now. I just wanted to say thank you for listening to me and if you're not here in the morning, well I'll understand."

"I'll be here Paul." he reassured him.

Paul smiled at him gratefully as he slowly climbed the stairs crossing the hall to his bedroom. His heart felt heavy as the door clicked shut behind him. The white glow of the moon illuminated his face as he sat down on the bed, crumpling the covers underneath his weight. As he stared into the partial darkness, he realised that although was drunk, he had never felt more sober in his life. He was also incredibly tired; tired of wallowing in his pain and his own self-pity. He knew he needed to snap himself out of this funk he was in and try and get on with his life but it was so hard especially when he missed her so much. God, he thought about Stephanie every single minute of every single day. He loved her with all his heart but he couldn't self-destruct like this for any longer. He was going to have to find some way to let her go and try and move on without her. He wasn't sure how he would do it. He just knew that he had to do it for the sake of his own sanity if nothing else. Quite simply he had to find a way to say goodbye.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Stephanie sighed softly as her finger lifted and pushed her black rimmed spectacles up the bridge of her nose. Leaning back in her chair, she rolled her lips together and adjusted the sheets of paper in her hand as her blue eyes began to scan the page in front of her. Her face was focused and determined. However she only made it as far as the start of the second paragraph when for the umpteenth time that day, the words blurred together and she lost her concentration, her mind insisting on drifting elsewhere.

Puffing her cheeks out in frustration, Stephanie threw the heavy manuscript to the desk where it landed with a low thud. She glanced up at the round clock on the wall and she visibly winced as she pushed her hair back from her forehead. Her deadline was looming ominously closer with every passing second and she had still to edit over a thousand pages. It was going to take a miracle to get it done in time. Shaking her head, she rubbed her hand wearily over her face and stifled a yawn. The emotional rollercoaster of the last six weeks were really beginning to take its toll on her. She felt exhausted both physically and emotionally.

Pushing back her chair, Stephanie got to her feet and crossed the short distance to the window. She felt the heat from the afternoon sun as she leant her forehead against the glass, her sad blue eyes gazing down at the busy streets below. They were filled with men and women of all ages; men and women going about their business seemingly happy with their everyday lives. But were they really happy or was it all just a convincing façade? A façade they had created to conceal the truth of their lives; the truth being they were unhappy and silently screaming on the inside. Screaming because they were living a lie and screaming because they were trapped in a life they just couldn't escape from. Fate had dealt them a cruel hand and unfortunately for her, she knew exactly how that felt.

Stephanie sighed heavily as she pressed her palm against the cool surface. She felt a pang in her chest as she continued to watch the people below. But really, she had no right to be standing here feeling sorry for herself. Yes, she was trapped in a marriage and a life she didn't want but that was no-one's fault but her own. After all, she had been the stupid one. She had been the one that, in spite of everything, had decided to marry Shawn and now she had to live with that decision no matter how miserable she felt or how badly her heart was broken. And it was broken. It was shattered into tiny little pieces knowing Paul was gone from her life forever. Never again would she find herself getting lost in those incredible brown eyes of his or feel his arms wrapped around her, making her feel so warm and safe and loved. God, she missed him. She missed him with everything inside her.

Stephanie sniffed as the hot tears welled in her eyes and slipped down her cheeks. She knew that really she had no right to cry but she couldn't help herself, not anymore. She was just so tired of putting on a brave face and pretending everything was fine. But it wasn't fine and it would never be fine again. And to think it had only been two months ago she had everything she could have ever wanted. She had the chance to be with the man of her dreams but she threw that chance away all because she didn't have the guts to hurt Shawn and go after what she really wanted.

Stephanie wiped the tears from her cheeks and jumped startled by the hand on her shoulder. Forcing a smile on her face, she spun round and felt her shoulders sag with relief when she saw Melissa standing there. Mel was her best friend and work colleague and the only person she had confided in over Paul. She'd had to. It was killing her holding this all inside but she had to. She simply didn't have a choice.

"God, you scared me Mel." she smiled, placing her hand over her chest and walking back to her desk absently shuffling the papers on her desk. "I thought it was Mark chasing up the manuscript. The deadline is five and I'm not even made a start to it."

She felt Melissa place her hand over hers stopping her frantic movement. As she looked up, she saw the sympathy in her big brown eyes.

"You don't have to pretend with me, Steph." she told her. "I know how upset you were just now. Is there anything wrong? Has something happened?"

Stephanie slowly shook her head as her lips lifted in a slightly embarrassed smile. "No. I was just feeling sorry for myself. It's pathetic, huh?"

"No, it's not pathetic. You're allowed to be upset every once in a while you know."

"Yeah, but not all the time, right?" she sniffed as she drew her hand back tucking a lock of brown hair behind her ear. "And especially not when the reason you're so miserable is totally your own fault."

Melissa sighed and took the seat across from Stephanie. She pressed her lips together thoughtfully as she watched her friend sit down and wipe at her face once more. "Steph, if you're that miserable why don't you do something about it? Why don't you talk to Paul and tell him you've realised what a huge mistake you've made."

Stephanie shook her head sadly. "I can't Mel. I really hurt him when I married Shawn. He'll never ever forgive me for that."

"How do you know that? Have you talked to him since?"

She sighed as she leant back in her chair. "No. Paul seems to have vanished off the face of the earth. He's relocated and the only number we have is his cell which he never answers when I call. I've even left him messages but none of them have been returned. I'm not sure he'll even listen to them anyway."

As she glanced in the direction of the window once more, Melissa sat watching her carefully, her brown crinkled with her concern for her friend. Since Stephanie had returned from her honeymoon six weeks ago, she had become a shell of her former self. She had even lost weight and her complexion was extremely pale. She had also lost her sparkle. Stephanie had such a vibrant personality and she was always laughing with her brilliant smile lighting up her face. Now those smiles were few and far between despite her trying so hard to be normal and keep up the pretence of being a happily married woman. But she knew her best friend far too well and she never had been able to pull the wool over her eyes. That was why she had forced Stephanie to tell her the truth when it became blatantly obvious to her that something was going on with her and she had to admit to being truly shocked when Stephanie had told her about meeting Paul. She had always been under the impression that Stephanie was more than happy with Shawn. She was also bewildered as to why she had then gone ahead with the wedding. She could see that her friend had made a huge mistake and that mistake was slowly starting to kill her on the inside. She just couldn't handle seeing Stephanie this way and she knew she had to persuade her friend to do something before it was too late. Clearing her throat, Melissa got her attention and sat forward in her seat as her brown eyes pleaded with her.

"Stephanie, you can't give up looking for Paul. Is there no-one else you could contact that would know where he is?"

Stephanie lifted her shoulder in a shrug. "There are his parents but I don't know where they live. And Shawn's already tried talking to Kevin but he says he doesn't know where Paul is."

"And wouldn't Kevin know the number for Paul's parents?"

Stephanie pressed her lips in a frown. "Probably. I'm not really sure."

"Well why don't you call Kevin and ask him for the number?"

Her blue eyes went wide as she quickly shook her head. "Are you kidding me? What would I say when he asks me why I want their number? Oh I'm sorry but I'm in love with Shawn's best friend and I've realised I can't live without him."

Melissa chewed her lip thoughtfully. "Good point. We'll need to think about that one."

Stephanie sighed softly and smiled gratefully at her friend as she clasped her hands together on her desk. "I know what you're trying to do Mel and I love you for it. I do. But honestly, I've made my decision and I'm just going to have to stick with it."

Melissa's mouth parted to reply but Stephanie held up her hand silencing her.

"Please, I don't want to talk about it any more. Paul is gone. I have to accept that and move on. Now if you don't mind, I need to finish this manuscript before I get my head chewed off."

Melissa watched as Stephanie lifted the papers in her hand and busied herself with them. She sighed and stood up unaware that her friend watched her until the door clicked shut behind her. She allowed her blue eyes to linger for a second before picking up her pen and trying her best to focus on the words in front of her.

* * *

Thousands of miles away, the man who constantly invaded Stephanie's thoughts had just entered his home. Kevin was sitting on the sofa and watched with amusement as Paul tried to close the door by kicking his foot and balancing the various rolled up bits of paper and files he was carrying in his hands. Eventually he managed but not without a couple of the plans falling and rolling out onto the floor. Paul turned his head at the sound of Kevin's amused laughter. His brown eyes twinkled as he pretended to scowl in his direction

"That's right. You just sit there on your fat ass and watch me struggle here you lazy bastard."

Kevin grinned and remained seated as Paul bent down and picked up the one of the plans from the floor, his big hands quickly rolling it back into place again.

"So, has your ass been permanently wedged on that sofa all day?" he asked.

Kevin shook his head and stood up. "You know who you sound like? My nagging ex-wife."

He turned and disappeared into the kitchen. Paul chuckled as he finished up and placed the plans on the table. He shrugged off his black suit jacket and tossed it on the back of the sofa as his thick fingers lifted to loosen the tie around his neck. Just then Kevin re-appeared with two bottles of chilled beer in his hand. Paul raked his fingers through his blonde strands and took the drink from his friend's outstretched hand smiling gratefully.

"So, did you get your flight booked or am I going to have to put up with you hogging the remote and drinking my beer for another week?"

Kevin smirked. "I fly out tomorrow. Try to hold off your celebrations until I'm out the door."

Paul grinned back as he threw himself onto the sofa. His body sagged wearily into the padded cushions as he took a mouthful of his beer. The cool liquid refreshed his dry throat and he sighed contentedly before noticing Kevin standing watching him with a preoccupied expression on his face. His brow immediately crinkled with his curiosity. "I know that look. What's on your mind?"

Kevin sat down on the chair and his eyes were concerned as he turned to his friend. "Are you sure you're going be alright when I go?"

"Hey, you know I'll miss seeing your ugly face around the place but I promise not to cry too hard."

Kevin shook his head. "Very funny but don't fob me off. You know what I meant."

Paul sighed heavily as his fingers absently began to pick at the label on the bottle. "I'll be fine Kev. Honestly. I'm back at work and I'm getting on with my life. I'm doing okay."

Kevin nodded pretending to be satisfied with his reply while inside he had to admit to still feeling a little worried about leaving Paul alone. Sure, he had definitely perked up especially over the last couple of weeks and seemed to be determined to get on with things. Kevin just wasn't sure if it would last once he was back living here on his own with time to think and dwell on what had happened with Stephanie. That was one of the reasons why he had stayed so long. He just wanted to make sure his friend was alright. "Can I ask you something?" he asked as he took a mouthful of his beer.

"Sure." nodded Paul.

"How long am I expected to keep telling Shawn I don't know where you are and that you've just upped and moved somewhere without telling anyone? He'll go nuts when he finds out I've been lying to him and that you're still here in Nashua and not only that, I've been with you for the last six weeks."

Paul's brown eyes were steely and determined as they glared at Kevin. "He's not going to find out because you're not going to tell him and after a while he'll give up anyway. Until he called me to tell me he was getting married, we hadn't kept in regular contact in about three years."

"But you're still best friends Paul. He still cares about you."

He sat forward on his seat shaking his head. "Look Kev, you know why I made my decision to lie and tell him I'd moved. I can't be his friend any more. I have to cut all contact. It's the only way I can get on with my life."

Kevin sighed and nodded in defeat. He knew it was pointless trying to get Paul to change his mind about the whole situation. Although he was back to functioning normally on a day to day basis and trying his best to put a brave face on things, deep down he knew he was still hurting badly over Stephanie. It would take a long time for the emotional scars to fade and his heart to begin to heal. That's why he was determined he would be would be keeping a close eye on Paul despite the distance between him. His finger wagged in his friend's direction as he pressed his lips together grimly. "Fine but I warn you now, you don't answer any of my calls and I'll be back here to hunt you down."

Paul smirked and playfully held his hand over his chest. "Hand on heart, I promise I'll be good and I'll keep in touch."

Kevin shook his head and bringing the bottle to his lips, he took a few large gulps finishing off his beer. He rose from his chair gesturing with the empty bottle. "You want another?"

Paul nodded as his brown eyes followed him into the kitchen. Despite his joking around, he knew he would be sad to see his friend leave tomorrow. Kevin had really been there for him the last few weeks and he honestly didn't know what he would have done without him. It was going to be tough once he was gone. He'd have plenty of time on his hands that's for sure and time to think about his life and about how empty it had become now Stephanie was no longer a part of it. God, he'd only known her for such a short period of time but it was amazing the impact she had made on him and his heart. It was going to take a long time to get over her. That's if he even could but God knows he had to give it a shot. He had to find some way of trying to exist without her. It was just as simple as that.

* * *

Stephanie walked into the apartment and closed the door behind her. Everything was in darkness which meant Shawn was obviously still at work. She flicked on the light and threw down her bag and coat. She kicked off her shoes and picked up the mail that was lying on the table beside the phone. She began to flick through it as she walked to the sofa but was stopped in her tracks as the phone began to ring. She threw down the mail and answered the call. "Hello?"

"You'll never guess whose number I managed to track down."

Stephanie rolled her eyes at her friend's excited voice. "Hmmm, let me guess. Would it be the hot new guy from the second floor? You know the one you've been stalking for the last few weeks."

Melissa's laughter echoed down the line. "No but don't you worry. I'm working on that one. Lisa in personnel owes me a favour and has promised to give me some details."

She shook her head. Her friend was definitely a case and a half when it came to pursuing the object of her affections. "Mel! You can't do that. Poor Lisa will get her ass fired for leaking personal information."

Her scoff crackled down the line. "Never mind about poor Lisa. Aren't you intrigued about what number I got?"

Stephanie sighed as she scratched at her head. "Not really but I'm sure you're going to tell me anyway."

"Paul's parents."

Her breath caught in her throat at the mention of Paul's name. As the sound of rustling paper crackled down the phone, she wondered how the hell had Melissa tracked the number down and more to the point why? She had told her to let it lie. As her heart beat a little faster in her chest, she let out a calming breath. "I thought I told you to forget about it Mel. It's pointless."

"That's what I thought you would say so that's why I called them myself."

Stephanie's blue eyes went wide with shock. Her fingers threaded through her hair clutching it tightly at her scalp as she began to pace the room in a panic. "Melissa! Why would you do that?"

"Because I'm your friend and because I can't bear to see you miserable like this. It's not fair to you and it's definitely not fair on Shawn."

Stephanie's face fell as she halted in her tracks. Her face was sad as she realised Melissa was absolutely right. Shawn was the innocent party in this mess and he didn't deserve it. God knows it was all her fault. Licking her lips, she tried to remain focused. "I just don't see what good calling Paul's parents will do." she sighed. "By the way, what exactly did you say to them when you called?"

"I told them I was a retail outlet looking for Paul to draw up some plans for a new store. I explained that the only number I had was Paul's old office in Nashua and could they give me the number to where he relocated."

Stephanie waited with baited breath as Melissa paused at the other end.

"They told me that I had been misinformed and that it's the same number. Steph, Paul's never moved. He's still in Nashua."

The blood beat in her ears but Stephanie didn't have a chance to fully react to what Melissa had just told her. She heard the door opening behind her and sighed as she turned to see Shawn walk through the door. She gave him a smile and turned her attention back to the phone call as she heard Melissa call out to her on the other end.

"Steph, did you hear me? Are you still there?"

"Yeah, I'm still here. Listen Mel, Shawn's just got in from work so I'd better go and get dinner started. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

Stephanie hung up and tried to compose herself as she felt Shawn wrap his arms around her waist. She gave a small smile as he kissed her cheek.

"Was that Mel calling to give you the latest gossip again?"

Stephanie pulled away breaking their embrace as her slightly trembling hands smoothed down her skirt. "Yeah. She just wanted to update me on her progress with the guy she likes at work."

Shawn laughed as he shook his head in amusement. "Poor guy. Heaven help him if Mel gets her clutches into him."

Stephanie forced a smile as she started to back away, her mind unable to deal with a conversation as it struggled to cope with what Melissa had just told her about Paul. "I'll just go and make a start to dinner."

She turned round and was on her way to the kitchen when Shawn's voice made her stop in her tracks.

"Has there been any message left from Paul today?"

Stephanie swallowed the lump that appeared in her throat at the mention of Paul's name. She closed her eyes and remained rooted to the spot. "No. Why, were you expecting him to call?"

She heard Shawn sigh in dismay behind her. "Not really. I just left another message on his phone again today. I'm starting to wonder if he's avoiding me."

Letting out a shaky breath, she did her best to compose herself as she turned round to face her husband. "Don't be silly. What reason would he have to not talk to you?"

He shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know. But there's something going on with him. He was acting weird at the wedding and Kevin said he was a complete mess while we were away. It's not like him to just up sticks and move away especially with his business."

Stephanie tried to ignore the sick feeling in her stomach as she forced another smile. "Try not to worry. He's probably fine. He'll get in touch when he's ready."

"You're probably right but I think I'll ease my conscience a little and give his parents a call."

Her face instantly fell and she felt her palms start to sweat as a panic began to engulf her. "Why would you do that?"

"Well they're bound to have heard from him. I just want to make sure he's alright."

Stephanie swallowed hard. He couldn't call Paul's parents. Shawn couldn't find out that his best friend was lying to him and doing his best to cut all contact with him because then he would want to know why. He would ask too many questions; questions he just couldn't find out the answers to. She needed to think of something and fast. She just couldn't let him make that call. Clenching her fingers together, she tried her best to persuade him otherwise. "Look, it's probably best not to bother them. Paul probably just wants to lie low for a while especially if something has been troubling him. In fact, it might be something that his parents don't even know about and if you call them, you might make them suspicious. Why don't you give it a little while longer?"

Shawn sighed as he took the band out of his hair and sat down on the sofa. "I guess you're right. Another week or so won't hurt."

Stephanie nodded and let out the breath she had been holding. "Good. I'll go and get dinner started."

She walked into the kitchen and once the door closed behind her, she leaned back against it and sighed. She closed her eyes as the news Melissa had given her finally began to sink in. Paul had lied. He was obviously desperate to cut all contact with her and with Shawn and had gone to extreme lengths to do so. She wiped her eyes as she felt the tears start to fall for the second time that day. She had hurt Paul so badly and that had never been her intention. She loved him so much and the thought of him being in pain was too much to bear. God, why had she been so stupid? Why did she not have the guts to tell Shawn and her family the truth? She sniffed as she tried to control her tears blinking them back angrily. She needed to get a grip of herself. Shawn could walk through the door any moment and if he saw her crying, he would start asking questions and that was the last thing she needed.

Stephanie took a breath and stood up to walk across to the refrigerator. She grabbed the vegetables and placed them on the counter. She then got a knife from the block and began to prepare the dinner. As the rhythmic chopping filled the room, she wondered how long she'd be able to stop Shawn from contacting Paul's parents. He had been trying to get hold of him for six weeks now and he didn't look like giving up. He'd also been in regular contact with Kevin as well to see if Paul might have talked to him. In fact it was Kevin who had told Shawn about Paul doing his so-called disappearing act.

Stephanie stopped what she was doing and the knife dangled from her fingers as she thought more about Kevin. What if he knew more than he was letting on? What if he knew Paul was still in Nashua and was helping him lie to Shawn. She felt her stomach start to churn with that thought. God, maybe Kevin even knew the truth about her and Paul. If Kevin was lying to Shawn, it would have to have taken something major to convince him to do so.

Stephanie felt her hand start to shake and she placed the knife down on the counter. She took a deep breath as she tried to calm herself down and think rationally. There was no reason to believe that Kevin knew anything about her and Paul. And Paul wouldn't risk telling Kevin the truth when he knew there was a chance that he would come back and tell Shawn everything. No, she was just being silly. There was nothing for her to panic about. But as she lifted the knife once more, why couldn't she shake the feeling that there was.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

The phone rang out in the office. Paul put down his pen and reached over his desk to pick up the phone. "Hello?"

"So you managed to go in to work all by yourself today. I am impressed."

Paul snorted in amusement at Kevin's greeting as he leant back and absently swivelled in his chair. "Checking up on me? I'm touched but I thought I'd managed to get rid of you yesterday."

Kevin chuckled. "No such luck man. Fortunately for you I am just a phone call away and I can check on your ass at anytime."

"Jesus Christ Kev, you've turned into my mother. Next thing you'll be checking to see if I've done my laundry."

"Well, have you?"

"I refuse to answer that question." grinned Paul as he raked his fingers through his blonde hair and briefly glanced out the window. "So, tell me, to what do I owe the pleasure of your phone call?"

He heard the heavy sigh on the other end of the phone.

"Well actually I got a call myself this morning. From Stephanie." Kevin said hesitantly and listened to the momentary silence on the other end of the line and his forehead crinkled with his concern. "Paul, are you there?" he asked him, concerned.

"Yeah, I'm here." Paul sighed. His heart felt heavy as his brown eyes closed and a picture of Stephanie's face planted itself firmly in his mind. God he missed her. It was taking everything he had to try and move on and forget her but somehow he was finding the strength even though the simple act of Kevin calling to talk about her was making his heart physically ache for her. It was completely pathetic but true. "So what did she want?" Paul asked him reluctantly.

"I don't know. I didn't actually talk to her. I missed her call but she left a message for me to call her back. Apparently Shawn's still desperate to get in touch. He's talking about calling your parents to get a contact number for you."

Paul sighed and wearily rubbed at his forehead. Why wouldn't Shawn get the message and just leave him alone? "Look, I'll talk to Mom and Dad. I'll make up some excuse and I'll ask them to tell Shawn they don't have a number for me."

"Don't you think they'll ask you why? I mean they know how close you guys are."

"I know but I'll think of something. I have to."

Paul paused as he licked his lips and fought an internal battle with himself as to whether he wanted to ask the question or not. However, his curiosity got the better of him and his voice was gentle when he eventually spoke.

"So are you calling Steph back?"

He heard Kevin sigh once more. "Yeah. I was going to call her once I'd spoken to you."

Paul leant forward on his desk and bowed his head. His tone was sad as he thought once more of the woman his heart just couldn't forget. "Will you do me a favour then? When you talk to her will you tell her I'm okay and not to worry. I understand about Shawn."

"Paul, I don't think that's a good idea, do you?"

"Please Kev, just tell her. I know she'll be blaming herself for everything."

Kevin's expression was grave as he pondered his friend's request. Paul should be worrying about himself and not Stephanie. He shouldn't even be giving her feelings a second thought. But that was Paul's problem. He was too nice a guy at times, sometimes too nice. He sighed in resignation. "Okay, if your name comes up, I'll tell her."

"Thanks man. Look, I gotta go. I've got a meeting in thirty minutes that I've still to prepare some stuff for. I'll talk to you later."

Paul hung up without waiting for his friend's goodbye and sighed as he turned in chair and stared out the window in his office. Chewing thoughtfully on his bottom lip, he knew that Stephanie calling Kevin had definitely thrown him for a loop and he wondered what the outcome of their conversation would be. He just hoped Kevin didn't end up having a pop at Stephanie about anything that had gone down. God knows that would be the last thing she needed. He knew how upset she was about the whole thing. He heard the pain in her voice every time she had left a message on his cell phone. Her words were still fresh in his memory as he hadn't erased them yet and of course he liked to torture himself practically every night by listening to them just to hear her voice. His heart broke every time he heard her sobs as she apologised to him for her actions. Still, he couldn't find it in that heart to get rid of them.

Turning from the window, Paul rested his elbows on his desk and placed his head in his hands. His pain had been so much easier to deal with when he had been angry with Stephanie. Now that anger had been replaced with acceptance and regret and deep down Paul knew she wasn't fully to blame for her marriage to Shawn. He knew he should have fought harder to make her realise that marrying him was the wrong thing to do. He should have forced her to tell Shawn the truth, hell he should have told Shawn himself. But now it was too late and all he could do was try to live with his decisions. But at least through his message that he left with Kevin, he could let Stephanie know that he still cared enough to help her live with hers and he hoped she was okay with that.

* * *

Stephanie looked at the ringing phone and took a breath as she saw Kevin's name appear across the display. She tried to control her nerves as she answered. "Hello, Stephanie McMahon speaking."

"Hey Stephanie, it's Kevin. By the way shouldn't you be using your married name?"

She gave a nervous laugh as she tucked her brown strands behind her left ear. "You're right. It just takes a bit of getting used to, you know?"

"I'm sure it does." Kevin paused as he prepared himself for their conversation. "So I heard your message. Shawn is determined to find Paul, huh?"

Stephanie sighed. "Yeah, he's really worried about him. Paul won't answer any of his calls."

"Well you can tell him to rest easy. Paul just needs some time away from everything right now."

Stephanie felt her stomach churn as she thought about Paul and what he was going through. He didn't deserve any of this that was for sure. "Is he okay, Kevin?"

There was a beat before she heard the sigh at the other end.

"I think you know the answer to that one Steph."

Stephanie's heart felt heavy as she realised Kevin obviously knew the truth. The question was what was he going to do with it? Her heart was racing as she replied, hurrying herself to explain. "I'm not proud of what I've done you know. I never ever wanted to hurt Paul."

"What did you expect Stephanie? Did you not expect Paul to be angry or hurt when you ended things? He fell head over heels in love with you only for you to throw his feelings back in his face."

Stephanie felt the tears spring to her sad blue eyes and she desperately tried to blink them away. Kevin's outburst automatically brought out her defences. "Look, what do want me to say? That I screwed up? Well there you go. I screwed up. The truth is once I found out Paul was Shawn's best friend I panicked. I didn't have the guts to make the right decision." As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Stephanie knew she had said too much. She pressed her lips together tightly as she felt Kevin's anger on the other end of the line.

"So because you were too scared to face the repercussions of your actions, you're screwing with Shawn's feelings as well as Paul's? You are some piece of work, Stephanie."

Kevin scowled as he heard Stephanie's sobs at the other end of the phone. Did she really expect him to have any sympathy for her after what she had done? Shawn and Paul were his friends and he was the one that had to pick up the pieces of the mess she had made.

"P-please tell Paul I'm so, so sorry. I never meant to hurt him. I swear I never."

As Kevin listened to Stephanie's plea, Paul's words from earlier echoed in his mind. It had obviously taken a lot for Paul to give him the message to pass on to Stephanie. He supposed he'd better do it for his friend's sake. It certainly wasn't for hers that was for sure.

"Look Steph, try and calm down." He heard her sniff down the phone as he exhaled slowly. "I told Paul you had called today, you know. He asked me to pass on a message to you."

Stephanie wiped the tears from her cheeks desperate to hear what Paul had to say although a part of her was dreading hearing it. She didn't think she could take it if he told her he hated her for what she had done. She took a deep breath to try and control herself as she braced herself for the truth. "What did he say?"

"He said not to worry because he's doing okay. He also understands and accepts your decision to marry Shawn."

Stephanie knew it was pointless to try and stop the tears that flew freely again down her cheeks. At least now she knew Paul had obviously listened to the messages that she had left on his answer phone. And although he couldn't bring himself to call her back, he had found some way of letting her know he was coping and that was all that mattered to her. Not her own pain or her heartache. She would find a way to live with that just like she'd have to find some way to live without Paul.

"Stephanie, are you still there?"

"Yes. Look Kevin, I'd better go. Thanks for calling." she told him hastily as she hung up the phone and her hand lingered on the receiver as she spoke out loud, her hushed words echoing around the empty office. "Goodbye Paul. I love you. I'll always love you."

Unbeknownst to Stephanie, she had pressed the hands-free button on the phone as she had replaced the handset and Kevin had heard every word and his face wore a worried expression as he held the receiver at the other end.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Melissa leant against the basin as she stood and waited for Stephanie to appear from the cubicle in the ladies restrooms. She lifted her wrist as she chewed her lip anxiously and glancing at her watch, she let out a surprised gasp as she realised the time. She was due back at her desk and Mark would no doubt be on the warpath.

"Come on Stephanie. I can't wait any longer." she called out.

She heard the click of the door and as Stephanie emerged from behind it, her pale face told Melissa everything she needed to know. She frowned in sympathy as her brown eyes watched her friend carefully. "It's positive, isn't it?"

Stephanie nodded her head and sighed heavily as she flipped the lid and threw the pregnancy test in the waste paper bin. She leaned against the wall and crossed her arms over her chest. She felt numb as she looked across at her. "What am I going to do Mel? The last thing I need right now is a baby in my life."

Melissa's heels clicked against the tiled floor as she walked over and placed her arm around Stephanie's shoulders. She tucked a loose hair behind her ear as she squeezed her affectionately. "I don't know Steph but I'm sure you'll figure something out. Maybe once the news has sunk in, you'll feel differently about it. Maybe you'll actually look forward to having a child."

A sad frown encompassed her face as she shook her head. "No, I won't and I know that sounds horrible and selfish but it's the truth. This baby ties me to Shawn and there's no way I can think about leaving him now. I'm trapped Mel."

Stephanie leant her head against hers and sighed. She had felt nothing but despair since the day she suspected she was pregnant. She had taken at least five tests in the hope that one would show up negative but so far none of them had. It was a pretty safe bet to say that she was pregnant.

"And you're sure this baby is Shawn's? There's no way it could be Paul's?"

Stephanie lifted her head giving her friend a wry smile. "That's the first thing that crossed my mind too until I thought about the dates." She puffed out her cheeks as she shifted her feet on the tiles. "I'm only four weeks late. I got my period on the second week of our honeymoon. I remember it vividly. I actually saw it as a blessing in disguise."

Melissa squeezed her shoulder once more and gave her a sympathetic smile in return. "So how far along do you think you are?"

"About eight weeks I think. I'm surprised I've not had more symptoms yet. I've never really felt nauseous or put on any weight."

"That's probably because you've been so distracted lately. That plus you haven't exactly been eating properly. It's no wonder you haven't put on an ounce."

Stephanie's mouth parted to reply when she was interrupted by someone banging on the door and a muffled voice shouted through to them.

"Hey! Whoever is in there had better open up before there's an accident out here."

Stephanie and Melissa looked at one another and burst into laughter despite the moment. They were still giggling as they walked over to the door and Melissa unlocked it. She didn't even have time to open the door before it was roughly pushed open from whoever was outside. The person didn't even acknowledge them and ran straight for a cubicle.

Melissa watched and shook her head. "Desperate times then?" She made her way out into the corridor. "I couldn't even tell who that was she was so fast."

Stephanie smiled as she followed her out smoothing down the hem of her cream coloured sweater. "I think it was Susan from accounts but I'm not sure."

She nodded as she stopped and turned to look at her friend. "Are you sure you're going to be okay?"

Her friend sighed as she ran her hand through her hair letting the loose strands fall softly around her face. "I don't know Mel. It's going to take a while for this to sink in I think."

"Well try and not make any rash decisions. Give yourself time to really think about what it is you want. Having this baby doesn't necessarily mean staying with Shawn you know."

Stephanie's jaw was clenched in determination as she adamantly shook her head. "No Melissa. If I have this baby then I stick with my marriage. That's one thing I am sure about."

"Okay." She smiled as she stopped outside her office. "Well its back to the grind. I'll talk to you later?"

Stephanie nodded and returned to her office. She had just approached her desk when felt a hand on her shoulder and she turned around to see Mark, her boss, standing smiling at her. He held an envelope in his hand which he held out.

"It's an invitation for a book launch I'd like you to attend." he explained. "It's one of the writers you signed up last year."

Stephanie smiled in acknowledgement and opened up the envelope. She quickly scanned the invitation. "Jennifer Hall. I didn't realise her book was published already."

"Yes and we're expecting it to do really well."

"It's in Boston in two weeks time. I'll check my diary but I'm pretty sure I'll be able to make it."

Mark pushed his glasses further up on his nose and smiled. "Good. You can let me know if there are any problems."

Stephanie smiled and watched as he walked away disappearing amongst the hustle outside but her smile soon faded as she looked back at the invitation and realised the name of the venue. It was the hotel; the same hotel that she had stayed in the last time she was in Boston. The very hotel where she had met Paul and fallen in love with him.

She sighed heavily and she felt a pang in her chest as she pushed out her chair and sat down at her desk. As she stared at the scattered piles of paper, Stephanie couldn't help but let her thoughts drift to Paul and she wondered how he was and what he was doing. Shawn still hadn't heard anything from him and he seemed to have given up even trying to contact him. And as far as she knew, Shawn hadn't even talked to Kevin either. Although that wasn't a bad thing as far as she was concerned. It had been over two weeks since she had talked to Kevin and discovered that he knew all about her and Paul. Ever since then she had been on tenterhooks wondering if he would let his conscience get the better of him and decide to tell Shawn the truth. But right now that was the least of her problems. She was pregnant with a baby that she wasn't sure she wanted. She had a lot of thinking to do and a major decision to make; a decision that Paul sadly no longer played a part of.

* * *

Kevin tapped his pen on the desk as he sat in his office deep in thought. After his conversation with Stephanie a couple of weeks back, he had decided not to tell Paul about what he had accidentally overheard. He thought it was for the best for everyone concerned especially his friend. He had come so far and had somehow gotten past his despair at losing Stephanie. In fact he seemed to be coping and getting on with his life again. If he knew what Stephanie had said about loving him, Paul would either be back to square one and start drinking again or it might give him the incentive he needed to actually do something about getting her back. And as much as Paul was his friend, so was Shawn. He couldn't be the one responsible for ruining his marriage. Or at least that was what he had thought. Now he was starting to have major doubts about his decision not to tell Paul.

He knew how much Paul loved Stephanie. He had seen it for himself and after a lot of thinking over the last couple of weeks, he realised that he couldn't be the one stopping his friend from being completely happy. Paul had literally been on cloud nine when he had called to tell him all about this amazing woman he had met while he was in Boston. He had even told him his plans for relocating to New York just so he could be with her. No-one had been more surprised to hear that than he had been. Paul had no shortage of admirers over the years but his friend had never really been interested in settling down. Sure, he'd gone out on dates and had the odd relationship here and there but they never seemed to last. Paul's problem was he was full of ridiculous romantic notions. He wanted to find "the one" and had always believed that there was one person out there that you were destined to spend the rest of your life with. Of course both he and Shawn had laughed at him – several times in fact – but it looked like his friend had been right all along. Right up until the part where he found out she belonged to someone else.

And that was another dilemma Kevin faced. Shawn. He loved Stephanie and what would it do to him if he was to lose her? He didn't deserve to be unhappy and to have his life ruined – he was too nice a guy for that to happen to him. But then again, he also deserved to be with someone who wanted to be with him because they were in love with them and not because they were too scared to admit the truth about loving somebody else. And Kevin didn't doubt that Stephanie loved Paul especially not after what he had overheard.

He threw down his pen and quickly picked up the phone before he lost his nerve. God knows he had changed his mind and back again so many times over the last couple of weeks. Kevin listened to the phone ring out at the other end and he checked his watch. It was just before eight o'clock. Maybe Paul was still at work. It wasn't unusual for him to be at the office at such a late hour. He was about to hang up when he heard the breathless reply at the other end.

"Hello?"

"I'm not interrupting anything there am I buddy?"

Paul's laughter echoed down the line. "No, unfortunately Angelina Jolie can't make it over tonight so I decided to get my workout at the gym instead. I ran inside when I heard the phone ring." There was a short pause and some movement on the other end. "So, is this you being motherly again and checking up on me?"

Kevin chuckled. "Something like that. How are you doing anyway?"

He heard another brief pause followed by a soft sigh.

"I'm alright. I actually went five minutes without thinking about her today. That's got to be a record, huh?"

His eyes flickered with his sympathy. "Paul, these things take time and ….."

Paul interrupted him before he could say anything else. "I know. You can spare me the lecture. I made the mistake of telling my mom everything and that's what I've been getting ever since. Her other favourite saying is there's plenty more fish in the sea."

Kevin chuckled before letting out a calming breath. The words were on the tip of his tongue to tell him about Stephanie when he heard his friend talk once more.

"You know my sister's also taken it upon herself to set me up with a friend of hers. We went out for a drink at the weekend."

His mouth parted in surprise at the news, amazed that Paul had actually gone on the date. "How did that go?"

"It was okay actually. She seemed nice enough."

"You don't sound too excited about it."

Paul's heavy sigh crackled down the line. "Well I only went through with it for Lynn's sake more than anything else. She's just trying to help I suppose. The only problem is she's arranged for us to have dinner with her on Saturday."

"It all sounds very cosy. You never know. You might actually enjoy yourself."

"Maybe. God knows I need to try and do something. I mean I've accepted I'll never have Stephanie to share my life with. It doesn't stop me from wanting her in it though."

Kevin closed his eyes and ran his fingers through his hair as he made his decision and offered Paul a silent apology. "I know. Look buddy I gotta go. I'd better go and check that Phil's re-stocked the bar before we open. I'll call you next week."

"Okay. Take it easy Kev."

Kevin hung up before he listened to the voice in his head telling him to change his mind. He knew that what Paul had just said had given the perfect opportunity to tell him what he had overheard Stephanie say about loving him. However, he decided he couldn't do it. Paul was trying to move on and seeing other people was definitely a step in the right direction. He would keep what Stephanie said to himself. It was best all round and it would save any further heart-ache for everyone involved, in particular his two best friends.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

Stephanie rested her head on the soft cushions as she lay across the sofa. Her knees were drawn to her chest as her arms wrapped around herself protectively. The television was on and the low sound was a distant noise as her mind drifted elsewhere pondering over her future; a future that may or may not include a child. And God knows she'd never ever imagined she'd find herself in this position; that she'd find herself even contemplating terminating a pregnancy. Ever since her first major crush in high school she had always pictured herself having children with the man she was in love with and for the past three years that man had been Shawn. And she had been happy and content with him. She really had. But then her whole world had been completely blown apart the minute she had sat in that bar in that hotel and seen Paul sitting there. Quite simply he'd stolen her heart and now Paul's face was the one that replaced Shawn's whenever she allowed herself to think of the future she wanted for herself. Of course it was an imaginary future. In reality she knew it was a future that would never come to be and that was no-one's fault but her own.

Sighing softly, Stephanie rolled onto her back, her brown strands fanning across the cushion. Her hand absently rested on her flat stomach thinking about the tiny life that was inside. If she had this baby, she knew Shawn would make a terrific father. She had no doubts about that but she did question her own ability as a mother and also as a wife because much to her dismay, she had started to feel resentment towards Shawn. And if she was being honest, that resentment was growing day by day. She just couldn't help herself even though she knew it was wrong and completely unreasonable. After all Shawn was the innocent party in this whole mess but for her it was much easier just to blame him for everything. It meant she didn't have to look to herself or her own stupid cowardice. Of course she knew that she was being totally illogical and deep down she still cared for Shawn, she did. She just wasn't in love with him. Not now. Now she merely saw him as the obstacle block between her and the future she desperately wanted with Paul. It was a future she wanted more and more as each day passed but it was a future that was hopeless especially now she was pregnant with Shawn's child. And what if she resented the tie that child gave her to her husband? What if she couldn't love her baby with all her heart knowing he or she was the reason she was stuck in a sham of a marriage. The baby didn't deserve a mother like that and it would be cruel and totally unfair to bring a child into this world knowing she might blame them or possibly resent them. Not only that, bring that child into a home that was so unhappy. So that meant there was only one real option for her.

Stephanie suddenly sat up and walked over towards the phone. She ignored the sick feeling in her gut as she glanced at the telephone directory she had been browsing through earlier. It was open at the page she had left it at and she placed her finger on the number she wanted. She noticed her hand lightly tremble as she punched in the numbers and the blood beat in her ears as she waited for someone to pick up at the other end.

"Brook Street Clinic, how can I help you?"

Stephanie licked her dry lips and closed her eyes silently apologising to the tiny life she'd never have the chance to meet. "I'd like to book an appointment for a termination please." she said sadly.

"Okay. Hold on please."

Stephanie pressed her lips together tightly as she fought the urge to cry. She knew she had no choice. This was honestly for the best and she believed that with everything inside her. Now she just wished the person would hurry up and make the damn appointment before she bottled out and changed her mind.

"Are you still there?"

Stephanie opened her eyes and let out the breath she had been holding as she heard the voice at the other end. "Yes, I'm still here."

"Is 4.00pm on Friday okay for you?"

Stephanie couldn't think what her schedule was but knew she would just have to worry about that later. If she didn't make the appointment now, there was every chance she would never call back and there was no way she couldn't go through with this. "Yes, that's fine." she replied.

"Okay. Can I take your name?"

As she gave her details, Stephanie heard the door open suddenly behind her. Her heart began to race as she realised it was Shawn. She pressed her eyes shut as she felt the pang of guilt in her chest. God, she was such a horrible person and she hated herself right now. She really did.

Stephanie ended the call as quickly as she could and took a deep breath to calm herself down. She then plastered a false smile on her face as she turned round to face her husband as he hovered by her. And it wasn't hard to pretend with him. Not when she'd been pretending for so long now.

"Hey, you're home early."

Shawn smiled at his wife as he walked over to kiss her. However, Stephanie managed to turn her face so that his kiss landed on her cheek and not her lips. He sighed and said nothing as he watched her move away and sit down on the sofa. "The meeting finished early so I thought I'd take advantage."

Stephanie nodded as she shifted on the leather cushions and they dipped underneath Shawn's weight as he sat down next to her putting his arm around her. Stephanie offered him a quick smile before she shrugged him off, picking up the manuscript that was lying on the table.

"I'd better get this done. I've got to have it edited by tomorrow morning."

Shawn shook his head and sighed as his wife turned her attention to the bunch of papers in her hand. He sat there silently for a moment before standing up and walking through to the kitchen trying to ignore the feeling of dejection that crept into his chest. Sadly he was becoming used to Stephanie's unwillingness to be close to him or even talk to him.

Shawn opened the refrigerator door and sighing heavily, he took out a beer. His hip leant against the counter as he took a long drink. He wondered if his wife would even notice if he got good and loaded or even care why he was in that state in the first place. His marriage was going to hell and he didn't have a clue what to do about it. Hell, he didn't even know why things were so screwed up between them. All he knew was that since they got married, the relationship had slowly deteriorated. Stephanie avoided any kind of physical contact with him and in fact they hadn't slept together in over a month. Not only that, she was quiet and withdrawn and hardly talked to him about anything. If she did it was about trivial matters and nothing of any importance. Shawn knew he should confront her about it but he didn't know how to bring the subject up. Instead he tried to tell himself that she was just finding it hard adjusting to being married. Stephanie was a very independent lady. Maybe she felt some of that independence had been taken away from her now that she was someone's wife. It was a lot to get used to.

Shawn sighed as he took another drink feeling the heaviness in his heart. Whatever was going on with Stephanie, he hoped she snapped out of it and quick. He missed the girl he had fallen in love with and the woman he had married. Somehow they had disappeared on him and deep down he knew he felt like he was losing her. He just didn't know how much more he could take. Feeling this distance between them was killing him and Shawn just prayed Stephanie came to her senses before she somehow slipped out of his life for good because he wasn't ready to let go of her. Not now and probably not ever. Quite simply he needed his wife.

* * *

The meeting was over and Paul had returned to his spacious office. The warm rays of the sun greeted him as he approached his desk and he sighed as he saw all the messages littered across it. There were at least a dozen in total which meant he could wave goodbye to catching the baseball game. At this rate he would be lucky to be out of this place by nine o'clock. This was why he hated Thursdays. Everyone always wanted to call and check just to see that their plans had been submitted in time for the Friday deadline. At times he felt like he was some kind of moron totally incapable of doing his job. After all he'd only been doing this shit for ten years now. He knew how the system worked better than anyone.

Glancing at the messages, Paul rubbed his face wearily when one in particular caught his eye. It was from his sister Lynn. She was obviously checking to see he wasn't going to back out from the dinner arrangements on Saturday.

Paul raked his fingers through his hair and sighed as he sat down heavily on the leather swivel chair in front of him. As his thick fingers held Lynn's message in his hand, he knew he really wasn't in a position not to go. Not only would his mother and sister nag him to death if he didn't turn up, he had actually decided it was only fair to give this dating thing another try. Because time was no mans friend and it had been nearly three months since the wedding. He needed to try and get over Stephanie somehow and move on with his life. Or at the very least try and do something to take his mind off her because it was really quite pathetic how Stephanie was still the first person he thought of when he woke up in the morning and she was always the last thing he thought of before he went to sleep at night. But somehow he was okay with that. He was coping and the pain in his soul seemed to fade a little more each day. Still, he wasn't under any illusions that he would find anyone to take her place. In his heart, Stephanie would always be "the one" for him. God knows he could never feel for anyone the way he felt for her but maybe it was time to get rid of the notion that he couldn't settle for less. Maybe it was time he simply settled for second best. And of course there was no risk involved in that. His heart wouldn't get shattered into tiny little pieces this time because this time he didn't have a heart to give. His heart belonged to someone else and he didn't see that changing any time soon. In fact he was pretty sure several lifetimes could flash by and he would still be madly in love with her because it seemed loving Stephanie meant loving her forever. At least it did for him. Now he just had to find the courage of his convictions and actually find a way to survive without her.


	12. Chapter 12

Sorry. This chapter is a bit "bitty" but at least it gets stuff out of the way so I can get to the next chapter. :)

* * *

Chapter 12

Juggling the various items in his hand, Shawn unlocked the apartment door. As his feet shuffled into the hallway of his home, he noticed the silence and realised that Stephanie wasn't home yet. He hung up his coat and threw down his keys on the table while balancing the bag in his hand. As he made his way into the living room, he saw the red light blinking on the answer machine but it would have to wait. First he had to put this food in the oven to keep it warm until Stephanie got home. He had taken the initiative and had ordered takeaway for dinner. He knew Stephanie had a late meeting so she would be hungry by the time she got home.

Shawn took the cartons out of the paper bag and placed them on the oven tray. Satisfied that the oven wasn't set to burn the food, he threw the paper bag in the bin and walked through to the living room. He switched on the television and was about to sit down on the sofa when he remembered about the message. Maybe it was Stephanie telling him what time she would be home. He wandered across to the phone and pressed the button on the answering machine.

"Hello Miss McMahon. It's the Brook Street clinic here. I'm just calling to apologise. I said 4.00pm was the time for your appointment tomorrow afternoon. It's actually 4.15pm. I hope this isn't inconvenient for you but if there are any problems, you can give me a call back. Thank you."

Shawn instantly frowned. Why would Stephanie need to go to the clinic? He immediately started to feel nauseous as he began panic. Maybe Stephanie was ill and that was why she was so withdrawn from him lately. God, he didn't know what he would do if something was seriously wrong with her. He simply hated the thought of her hurting or being in pain and not only that, she was dealing with it alone. Shawn quickly grabbed the telephone directory and skimmed through the pages. His finger traced the page until he found what he was looking for. Suddenly his panic turned to anger as he saw the advertisement for the clinic. It specialised in gynaecology, specifically terminations. Stephanie was pregnant and obviously had no plans to tell him about the baby.

Shawn felt the blood beat loudly in his ears as a red mist descended over him. Enraged, he picked up the phone book and screamed in anger as he threw it across the floor. He ignored the hot sting of the tears in his eyes as he grabbed the jacket that he had hung up not five minutes ago and picking up his keys, he stormed out of the apartment slamming the door behind him.

* * *

Half an hour later Stephanie arrived home. She noticed the television was on and assumed Shawn was home. Her stomach rumbled as she smelt the aroma coming from the kitchen and she made her way there to hello but stopped in her tracks when she realised it was empty. Her husband was nowhere around.

"Shawn?" she called out across the small living room.

There was no reply and Stephanie walked to the bedroom. He wasn't there either nor was he in the bathroom. She frowned. Why would he just up and leave especially with food in the oven unless he had to go to the store or something. Yes, that was probably it. Shawn had gone to the store.

Stephanie walked back into the living room and that was when noticed the phone book scattered across the floor. Tucking her hair behind her ear, she bent down to pick it up and wondered why on earth it was lying there. It was too far across the room to have simply fallen from the table. Stephanie walked towards the phone and placed the book down. As she glanced at the answering machine, she saw that although the light wasn't blinking, a message had been left. She pressed play and immediately her blood froze as she listened to the message from the clinic. Her blue eyes were wide with alarm and she felt physically sick as she realised that Shawn must have heard it. He also must have checked the phone book and worked out why she had made the appointment. Stephanie felt the tears in her eyes as she walked to the sofa in a daze and threw herself down on the seat. Shawn knew she was planning to get rid of their baby. What on earth was she going to do now?

* * *

Shawn sat at the bar and threw another shot down his throat. He had lost count of how many he had consumed but he didn't care. He just wanted to get drunk and forget all about his conniving wife at home. The bitch must be really stupid if she thought she would get away with this but at least now he knew the reason why she had been acting strange towards him.

Shawn summoned the bar tender for another drink. As he waited on some service, he heard his phone ring. He immediately snarled as he reached into his pocket. If it was Stephanie, she could fuck off and leave him alone. He wasn't interested in her sob story or her pathetic excuses. Peering into the low light, he held the phone in front of him and made out Kevin's name on the screen. As he answered it, he stood up from his seat and wandered through towards the rest rooms. Music was playing from the old jukebox in the corner and he was struggling to hear his voice.

"Hello?"

"Hey Shawn. Long time no speak. How's married life?"

Shawn's nostrils flared in a snarl. "You really don't want to hear my opinion on that right now Kev."

Kevin heard the anger in his friend's voice and his brow crinkled in concern. Shawn very rarely lost his temper. Something major must have happened for him to be like this. "Shawn, tell me what's up."

"My bitch of a wife. That's what's up."

"Come on Shawn. I'm sure you can sort out whatever's happened between you."

Shawn snorted down the phone. "Oh don't worry. My wife is planning on sorting out our problem tomorrow. Only problem is it will be too late because I know the truth."

"What is it Shawn? What the hell has happened?"

"Stephanie's planning a termination."

Kevin felt his stomach plummet. "She can't be. That means…."

"That's right Kev. Stephanie's pregnant."

He swallowed thickly as his head tried to wrap around it all. Things were getting out of control now. "Are you sure you haven't made a mistake Shawn?"

"No. My wife is pregnant and I want to know who the fucking father is because it sure as hell wasn't an immaculate conception." His deep breath crackled down the line. "Listen I gotta go. I'll talk to you later."

"No Shawn, please…."

Kevin heard the click at the other end and placing down the receiver, he immediately placed his head in his hands knowing everything was so messed up. Stephanie didn't have a clue that she wasn't the only one in their marriage that had been keeping secrets. Shawn had yet to tell his wife that he couldn't father children. He had had a rare form of cancer when he was younger and the chemotherapy treatments had made him infertile. He had told Shawn umpteen times that it was something he really should tell Stephanie before they got married. However, Shawn had been scared that Stephanie would call off the wedding so he had decided to wait until after the honeymoon before he told her. He obviously hadn't got round to it but now it was too late. Shawn knew Stephanie had been cheating on him with another man. What he didn't know was that it was Paul she had been sleeping with and it was Paul who was obviously the father of their child.

Kevin stood up and poured himself a drink from the bottle he took from his liquor cabinet. He gulped down the drink and closed his eyes as the liquid burned a path down to his stomach. What the hell he was supposed to do now?

* * *

Kevin lay in his bed as he looked up at the ceiling. He hadn't slept at all last night and instead he had tossed and turned restlessly. His mind had constantly dwelt on the mess his friends were currently in and what a mess it was. Honestly, a Hollywood movie writer couldn't come up with half this shit. Rubbing at his weary eyes, he jumped slightly startled as he heard the phone on the night stand start to ring. He looked at the clock. It wasn't even six in the morning. Who the hell would be calling at this time? He reached across to pick up the receiver. "Hello?"

"Hey Kev, it's Shawn."

He pushed himself up the bed suddenly feeling wide awake. "Shawn, look I want you to listen to me….."

"No Kev, I want you to listen to me. I need you to keep what I told you to yourself."

"But Shawn…."

"No. I've decided I'm not telling Stephanie the baby's not mine."

Kevin's eyes went wide. Shawn was clearly crazy. "And what good is that going to do?"

"Look I can't have a family of my own. The best I can do is try and persuade Stephanie to keep the baby and we can bring it up as mine."

"Shawn you can't do that. You can't live a lie."

But as soon as the words were out of Kevin's mouth, he realised that was already the case and he was a bit late dishing out that advice because sadly Shawn's whole marriage was a lie.

"Look once I calmed down I spent all last night thinking about this." sighed Shawn down the line. "I'm bringing up the child as my own. Stephanie doesn't have a clue that I'm not the father and I'm going to keep it that way. I want this baby Kevin. It's my only chance and I'd appreciate it if you didn't spoil this for me."

Kevin was about to reply when he heard the click of the phone at the other end. Sighing he reached over and replaced the receiver slowly shaking his head. Shawn thought it was going to be so easy to pretend this child was his but what he didn't know was that Paul was the real father and he also knew about his friend's infertility. If he ever got wind of Stephanie's pregnancy, he'd soon put two and two together and realise the baby was his. The question was would Paul ever find out and would he ever have the guts to tell him himself? Right now he honestly didn't know the answer to that question.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Shawn opened the door quietly and walked into the apartment. He tiptoed into the living room and finding it empty and silent he felt a wave of relief wash over him. Stephanie must still be sleeping which meant he had more time. Because for all his anger and bravado with Kevin earlier, he was dreading the conversation he was about to have with his wife. In fact the thought of it made him feel sick to his stomach and he didn't know why he felt that way. After all, he wasn't the one who had kept the baby a secret and selfishly planned a termination. He also wasn't the one who had been unfaithful and screwing God knows who behind his back and he couldn't believe that Stephanie was capable of doing such a thing. He had always thought she was loyal and happy and she certainly had told him often enough that she was in love with him. Although if he was honest, those times were few and far between since they had returned from their honeymoon and an affair certainly explained her behaviour of late. Stephanie had been cold and distant with him. A far cry from the woman he thought he had married but what had he done to make her turn to another man? What was so wrong that she had to find solace in another man's bed? He'd always thought their relationship was tight. He'd never dreamt Stephanie could ever be unfaithful to him.

Shawn sighed and shook his head as he felt his emotions begin to bubble to the surface once more. He didn't want to think about any of that. He couldn't. He had to keep a calm façade when he talked to Stephanie mainly because he couldn't let her know that he knew about her affair. Not when he wanted to bring up the baby as his own.

Raking his hands through his hair, Shawn felt his temples start to throb. God knows he'd been over everything in his head a hundred times and he was determined this was the only way forward because despite what she had done to him, Shawn still loved Stephanie and the thought of losing her scared him to death. He wasn't so sure he could live without her. He also knew that this was his chance to have the family he never thought he would have because God knows he felt guilty enough about his own secret. Still he would just have to put all his guilt and pain and anger aside and try to move forward with his wife and child by his side. He had to forget she had been with someone else. His only priority was to persuade Stephanie not to go ahead with the abortion.

Shawn's feet padded across the carpet. Although the first rays of sunshine were filtering through the curtains, the living room was still in darkness and Shawn didn't see Stephanie as she lay wide awake on the sofa. As he walked towards the kitchen, he was startled to see a light being turned on and he froze as he heard her voice behind him.

"Where have you been? I've been worried about you."

Shawn let out a slow breath trying to control the anger he felt at her presence. Christ, this was going to be harder than he thought. His fists clenched with rage by his side as he wondered what gave her the right to lie there and pretend she was worried about him. She sure as fuck wasn't worried about him when she was screwing another guy behind his back. In fact that's what probably what she'd been doing all night. She'd probably been screwing who knows what God knows where. His jaw clenched firmly as he heard Stephanie's weary sigh over his shoulder.

"I know you heard the message."

He closed his eyes and tried to keep his temper in check because screaming that she was a lying, cheating bitch at the top of his voice wouldn't accomplish anything. Instead Shawn clenched his fists even tighter and when he spoke, he was surprised at how calm he sounded despite the war that raged on inside him.

"You're not going ahead with the abortion Stephanie. You're not killing my child."

Stephanie's choked sob echoed around the four walls of the room and Shawn shook his head wondering what right did she have to be crying? She was the one who had hurt him with all her lies and deception and she was the one planning to cover the whole thing up by having a fucking termination.

"I'm so sorry. I never meant to hurt you Shawn. That's the last thing I wanted. Believe me."

Shawn pressed his lips together tightly as he finally trusted himself to turn around and look at her. Stephanie's sad blue eyes looked up at him apologetically and he swallowed hard as he felt his own sadness rise to the surface. His chest felt tight and his throat burned with his pain. It was taking everything he had not to throw back her apology in her face because Stephanie hadn't been sorry when she went ahead and slept with another guy. If she had only managed to keep her fucking legs shut then none of this would be happening and he wouldn't have to stand here pretending he could look at her. God, the sight of her made him sick to his stomach but he had to do this. It was his only chance at ever having a family.

"Just make sure you cancel that appointment." he spat back at her. "In fact, I'll do it. God knows I can't trust you not to go and get rid of our child behind my back."

Shawn sniffed and furiously blinked back the tears that burned in the back of his throat. He wouldn't give Stephanie the satisfaction of knowing how much he was hurting right now. He'd be damned if she saw him cry.

"But Shawn it's for the best. I'm not ready for a baby right now." she pleaded as the tears rolled down her cheeks.

Shawn shook his head furiously, his gut wrenching with his pain. "But what about me, Steph? I mean don't I have the right to decide whether or not I'm ready to become a father? Who do you think you are to take that decision away from me? Well I'll tell you who you are. You're nothing but a lying conniving bitch!"

He watched as Stephanie fell down on the sofa and placed her head in her hands as she sobbed heavily. He hoped she didn't expect any sympathy from him because she wasn't getting any. She had no-one to blame but herself. But as he continued to listen to his wife crying, Shawn ran his fingers through his hair and frowned. He never could bear to see her in pain and despite everything, he still loved her. He always had and he always will.

"Stephanie, stop it. All the crying in the world isn't going to change any of this." he snapped at her.

Shawn wearily sat down on the chair opposite her and waited patiently until she had eventually calmed down. He heard her sniff a couple of times before she lifted her head to look at him. He tried to ignore the sick feeling in his stomach as their eyes connected in the dim lighting of the room.

"Stephanie, you can't do this. You can't kill our child."

Stephanie hung her head once more unable to look at him. Her blue eyes darted back and forth across her clasped hands. God he made her sound so cold and so calculating. She didn't see her decision as killing her baby. She saw it as saving her child from being brought up by a mother who was unable to care for him or her properly; a mother who might just feel resentment towards her own flesh and blood and she couldn't bear that to happen.

"You're going to have this baby and we're going to bring it up together. Do you hear me?"

Stephanie raised her head and looked up to see Shawn with tears in his eyes. God she was such a horrible person. She couldn't hurt him like this. She couldn't take away the child he so desperately wanted. He would never forgive her if she hurt him by going through with the abortion and if she was honest, she probably couldn't forgive herself. It went against everything she knew to take an innocent life and if she was honest, she had been battling with her decision to terminate her pregnancy ever since she had made that damn appointment. That right there told her there was every chance she probably wouldn't go ahead with the abortion anyway.

Knowing that her final decision had been made, Stephanie slowly nodded her head and saw Shawn let out the breath he had been holding. However, he said nothing and after a brief moment of silence, he stood up and made his way through towards the bathroom. As soon as he was inside, Shawn locked the door and slid down against the wall. The pain was crippling him and he held his head in his hands as he finally gave in to the tears that overwhelmed him. His shoulders shook with his frightened breaths and sobs as he finally let out some of the hurt and anguish that he had been holding inside ever since he had found out that his wife had been sleeping with someone else and had shattered his heart in two.

_Two Weeks Later_

Stephanie looked up and sighed as she saw the "delayed" sign beside her flight to Boston. It was typical. Practically every time she was at this airport her flight was running late. She absently rubbed her stomach as she felt it start to rumble. She hadn't eaten anything all day and she hoped Melissa came back with her sandwich soon. She had been gone for over ten minutes already and had probably been distracted by some good looking guy she had spotted. They were like a magnet to her big brown eyes but Stephanie was so glad she was here and accompanying her to this book launch. It's not like Shawn would have come anyway.

Although she had agreed to keep the baby, things had been very tense and strained between them over the last couple of weeks. He could barely stand to look at her most of the time and he had taken up heading to the nearest bar after work instead of coming home. So when he did eventually arrive, he usually went straight to bed and avoided any sort of conversation with her. They were practically strangers to one another and Stephanie knew that was no-one's fault but her own.

"Sorry. The queue was a nightmare but I got your chicken mayo. Eventually."

Stephanie looked up and smiled at her friend who was raking through the paper bag in her hand. She held up the sandwich triumphantly and passed it on to Stephanie.

"Thanks Mel. I'm starving."

"You're welcome." Melissa smiled and sat down beside her and pushed her blonde hair behind her ears. "So, I saw our flight was delayed. You're bad luck for me Steph. Every time I come here with you we end up delayed."

Stephanie laughed. "Oh, I'm bad luck? What about you? Maybe it's you that's the bad omen."

Melissa smiled and shook her head. "Nope. This only happens when I'm with you."

Both girls began to eat their sandwiches and sat in silence for a moment, content to watch all the people around them as they consumed their lunch. Melissa wiped the mayonnaise from the side of her mouth before turning to look at Stephanie.

"So, we don't have to be back in the office tomorrow?"

She shook her head as she swallowed her food. "No. Mark said we could have tomorrow off seeing as how it's Friday anyway plus this book launch will probably last until late tonight."

"I'd be right in assuming that you won't be in any hurry to get home though."

Stephanie's shoulders slumped forward with her sigh. "You got that right. Shawn won't even look at me just now let alone talk to me. I even asked him if he wanted to go to the ultrasound I've got scheduled in for next week. I'm still waiting on an answer to that one."

Melissa sighed and patted her friend's leg offering her some comfort. She knew Stephanie was miserable and she couldn't stand to see her like this any longer. It had gone on for the last three months and quite frankly she was getting sick fed up of it. And being a girl of action, it was time to do something about it. God knows being without Paul was slowly killing her friend on the inside.

"I think we should go on a road trip." she suggested.

Stephanie looked at her friend with raised eyebrows. "What road trip? And where would we go?"

Melissa smiled. "We could go to Nashua to see Paul. It's not far from Boston and I'm sure even we could get there in one piece. We rent a car at the airport and take it from there."

Stephanie slowly shook her head as she scrunched the paper bag in her hand, her appetite suddenly gone. "No Mel. There's no point. Paul and I are over."

Her friend let out a frustrated sigh. "But you don't have to be. Look Steph, you and Shawn are both miserable. It's not fair for you to keep going on like this."

"But I've got no choice, can't you see that? Any chance I had to make things right with Paul disappeared the day I decided to keep Shawn's baby. I've accepted that and now I've got to move on."

Stephanie stood up and threw her wrapper in the bin beside her effectively ending their conversation.

"I'm going to the bathroom. I'll be back in a minute."

Melissa watched her friend disappear among the crowd of people in front of her. She sighed softly, frustrated by Stephanie's bloody stubbornness. Why couldn't she see that staying with Shawn was going to cause her nothing but misery? She didn't deserve to be unhappy and neither did Shawn. There had to be a way to try and make her see sense about Paul. She just needed to figure out what that something was.


	14. Chapter 14

This story is already complete so I didn't think you'd mind the double chapters especially when there had been a serious lack of Paul/Steph interaction lately lol. And again, thanks for all your lovely feedback. It definitely encourages a girl to keep writing and posting :)

* * *

Chapter 14

Stephanie nervously smoothed down the black silk dress she had chosen to wear to the book launch. She still wasn't showing any outwards signs of her pregnancy and the dress emphasised her slim, toned figure. As she gazed around the busy function room, she felt Melissa nudge her on her side getting her attention.

"Stop fidgeting Stephanie. She's making her way over here now."

Stephanie fought the urge to groan out load as she straightened up and smiled greeting the tall, slim blonde woman in front of her. "Hello Jennifer."

"Hi Stephanie." she smiled. "I can't believe you remember me."

"Oh I always remember a face." Stephanie replied. "So I understand congratulations are in order. The launch is going extremely well."

Jennifer beamed back proudly. "Why thank you. Actually while you're here I wondered if I could discuss some ideas I have for my next publication."

Melissa held up her hand to interrupt them while she had the chance. God knows once that Jennifer broad got talking, there was no stopping her especially when the topic of conversation was about herself. "I'll leave you guys to talk. Stephanie, I'll go and get us some drinks."

Stephanie smiled and nodded as Melissa made her way across to the bar which was thankfully quiet despite the free drinks. She lifted her hand and summoned the bar tender.

"A champagne and an orange juice please."

"I pity the poor person who is staying sober at this thing. Is it you?"

Melissa turned round to smile at the man standing beside her and her smile widened as she silently thanked her lucky stars. The guy was absolutely gorgeous. In fact scratch, that. The guy was a total God. Maybe there was going to be a plus side to tonight after all. "No, it's for my friend. She's pregnant." she explained.

"Well then I hope she makes it through tonight in one piece." the guy smiled as his big hand absently picked at the peeling label on his bottle of beer.

Melissa laughed as she took a sip of her drink. "She'll be alright. We both work for a publishing company so we're immune to this sort of thing. I take it you don't come to book launches very often though."

The God shook his head. "No. Well, not by choice anyways. I've been dragged along here tonight."

"Oh." Melissa said feeling her hopes fade as she realised he must be here with someone. She should have known it had been too good to be true. Gorgeous guys like this one were never unattached. "So your wife didn't let you stay at home, huh?"

He quickly shook his head. "Oh no. She's not my wife. Not even close."

She felt herself smile at his reaction. He obviously wasn't serious about whoever he was with. "Is she a girlfriend then?"

She laughed as she saw him screw up his nose.

"She's not really that either. She's just someone I've been seeing the last few weeks.

Speaking of which, here she comes now."

Melissa watched on with amusement as he downed his beer in one go.

"Hey, Jen. Can I get you a drink?"

Melissa turned round to see Jennifer Hall standing in front of her with her lips pressed together and a false smile on her face. She was obviously feeling threatened that her boyfriend was talking to her. If it wasn't so pathetic, Melissa knew she would find it terribly amusing.

"No I'm fine. Actually there's someone I'd like you to meet."

"Okay. Lead the way."

The God turned to smile at Melissa before walking away. "I'm sorry. It was nice to meet you."

"You too." she smiled back as she gestured to the orange juice in her hand. "I'd better be getting back to my friend anyway."

He nodded before following Jennifer to wherever she was headed. Melissa wistfully admired his perfect form for a second before she made her way through the various people dotted around the room. She smiled as she saw Stephanie looking thoughtfully out the window.

"Thinking of making a break for it?"

Stephanie jumped slightly startled by her friend's presence before she absently smiled taking the glass of orange juice from her outstretched hand. "Not yet although I could be tempted."

"Well I met the most gorgeous guy at the bar." Melissa told her. "Of course he was taken and by none other than Miss Jennifer Hall herself."

Stephanie glanced out the window once more with a melancholy expression. "Well this place has been known to host a gorgeous guy or two."

Melissa was about to ask her what she meant when she spotted Jennifer and her date coming towards them. She anxiously tapped her friend on the shoulder. "Steph, here's Jennifer now and she's with the gorgeous guy." she hushed.

"There you are. I thought I'd lost you. I'd like to introduce you to someone." said Jennifer.

Stephanie turned round forcing a false smile on her face but that smile quickly faded and her breath caught in her throat as she saw the person standing in front of her. She could feel her hand tremble as it gripped her juice tightly. She blinked a couple of times unable to believe her eyes and a hot lump lodged in her throat as she fought the sudden urge to cry.

"Paul, this is Stephanie. Stephanie, Paul." said Jennifer.

Melissa instantly clamped her hand over her mouth. The gorgeous guy was Paul? No way! Her sympathetic brown eyes settled on her friend and her heart went out to her noticing how shocked and overwhelmed she looked. No wonder. This was a curveball and a half and as she turned her head, Melissa could see Paul was faring no better either. He was standing frozen to the spot, his mouth parted in stunned silence.

"Do you two know each other or something?" asked Jennifer as she looked between Paul and Stephanie with a confused expression on her face.

Paul was the first one to speak as he cleared his throat and slowly nodded his head, his brown eyes never leaving Stephanie for one second. "Yeah." he said softly.

"Well, you don't look very pleased to see one another." Jennifer chuckled nervously.

"I guess I'm just a little shocked that's all." admitted Paul as he licked his dry lips and let out a calming breath. He could feel his heart racing in his chest. It was a heart that had been silent for so long now yet one second in Stephanie's presence, it was like it remembered how to beat again. And she was so beautiful. Even more beautiful than he remembered like his memories of her never did her justice. And how could they? She was breathtaking and he couldn't believe after all this time and all his heartbreak, she was just standing there. Here. In this hotel.

"Would you please excuse me? I…I don't feel so well."

Before he could say a word, Stephanie had placed her drink down on the table and scurried out of the room. Paul could only watch on helplessly as she disappeared into the hotel foyer out of sight.

"I'd better go and check on her." smiled Melissa apologetically.

He watched her in a daze as she followed after Stephanie dumping her champagne down beside the glass of orange juice on the table.

"Well that was rude." commented Jennifer.

But Jennifer and her opinion was the last thing on his mind as Paul's eyes settled on the table in front of them and the untouched drinks that had been hastily left there, in particular the orange juice. His earlier conversation with Stephanie's friend at the bar suddenly sprung to his mind and an uneasy feeling developed in the pit of his stomach. She had said her friend was pregnant and it didn't take Einstein to figure out that she must have meant Stephanie. But that couldn't be right. Shawn was infertile. He couldn't father any children. Suddenly the pieces began to fall into place and the blood beat in Paul's ears as he realised that there could only be one other option. The baby that Stephanie was carrying wasn't Shawn's which meant there was every chance the baby was his.

"Paul, what's going on?" asked Jennifer grabbing his attention as she tugged on the sleeve of his jacket. "What's the story between you and Stephanie?"

Everything was a haze as he shrugged her arm away from him, struggling to take it all in. "Not now Jen. I'll be back in a minute." he told her as he quickly left the room.

Paul's head was spinning as he raced through the hotel lobby and stepped out into the fresh night air. Raking his hands through his long blonde strands, he felt unable to stand still as he began to pace up and down the street in front of the entrance. His mind was working overtime as it tried to process what had happened here tonight. After all it was a big enough shock seeing Stephanie here after all this time but to have her pregnant? Someone somewhere was having a laugh at and his expense. Because he had been doing okay. He really had and he had finally been getting his shit together. Christ, yesterday he'd gone a whole hour without thinking about Stephanie and that alone had been some sort of record. Now she was here at this hotel and pregnant. What the hell was he was supposed to do now? Because that baby was his. It had to be because there was no other explanation for her being pregnant. Unless of course he was only one in a long line of affairs that Stephanie had had since she had been with Shawn.

But as Paul sighed and leant his back against the red brick wall of the building, he knew that was totally untrue. In his heart, he knew he had been the only one which begged the question did Stephanie know that the baby she was carrying was his and not Shawn's? Because although Shawn hadn't told Stephanie about his infertility before they got married, he had promised to tell her straight after. But that was a hard thing to admit to the woman you loved especially when you had married that woman under false pretences. So maybe he hadn't told her the truth. Maybe Stephanie was still in the dark.

Suddenly feeling desperate to know the answer, Paul took his cell out his pocket and punched in Kevin's number. He was the only person who would know the truth about what Stephanie knew because Kevin was as much a confidante to Shawn as he was to him, even more so given the state of his own relationship with Shawn.

"Come on Kev. Answer your goddamn phone." he muttered into the night air as he tapped his foot impatiently. He was about to give up when he heard his friend pick up.

"Kev, is that you?"

"Paul. Hey. How are you? I was going to call yesterday but my damn order got mixed up. I got twenty litres of vodka too many and the brewery wouldn't take them back. Bastards."

Paul shook his head impatiently. He couldn't concentrate on what Kevin was saying and he wasn't particularly in the mood for making small talk with him. "Never mind that Kev. I'm not calling to talk about vodka."

"Then what are you calling for?"

"Look, I've just found out Stephanie is pregnant."

The silence on the other end of the other line spoke volumes to him and Paul's clenched his jaw in anger. The bastard knew. The bastard knew Stephanie was pregnant and it was pretty obvious he'd had no plans to tell him about it. So much for their fucking friendship!

Paul's mouth lifted into a snarl. "So Kev, how long were you planning on keeping this a secret from me, huh? A year? Twenty, maybe?"

"Look Paul, it's not that simple."

"Yes it is. You know there's no chance in hell Shawn is the father. That baby is mine."

"Yeah, well Stephanie doesn't know that now does she? As far as she's concerned, the baby is Shawn's." There was a brief pause and Kevin's heavy sigh echoed down the line. "Look Paul there's something you should know. Shawn knows and he wants to bring up the child as his own."

Paul scoffed as he quickly shook his head. "No way, Kev. I'm the father of that baby. No-one else."

"Paul, don't do anything rash here, please. Shawn doesn't know about you. Think of the consequences. Think of all the heartache and trouble you could cause."

"I don't give a damn Kev. That baby is mine. Shawn will find out the truth whether he likes it or not."

Paul hung up and placed the phone back in his pocket. His chest rose and fell with his angry breaths as he cursed his friend. Kevin was a fucking ass for keeping the baby a secret and he knew why he'd done it. He was obviously too scared of the consequences if Shawn was to ever discover the truth about him and Stephanie. But screw the consequences. Paul realised he didn't care. Not anymore because the truth was he was way past feeling guilty about any of this. All it could ever potentially cost him was his friendship with Shawn and that was over anyway. And then there was Stephanie. God, just seeing her tonight had made him realise that he was crazy for even thinking he was getting over her. Because he wasn't over her. Not by a long shot. He loved her. In fact every part of him loved her and those were feelings that just wouldn't go away. Not in this lifetime. And now Stephanie was carrying his child; a product of that love. He wanted nothing more than to be with her and have a family together. After all he'd dreamt about it often enough and Stephanie was the only woman in that dream. She was the only one he'd ever pictured his future with. No one else came close. She was the one. Now all he had to do was find some way of letting her know the baby she was carrying was his because that was the only way he would persuade her to leave Shawn. And he would persuade her. He was going to do whatever it took to have Stephanie back in his life because he gave up way too easy when he let her go the last time. He wasn't going to give up this time because being without Stephanie was no longer an option for him. He wanted her and he wanted a new life with her in it and he was in the habit of getting of what he wanted.


	15. Chapter 15

Thanks again for all your lovely feedback. I decided seeing you'd been so generous, it would be cruel to keep you waiting for the next chapter lol. Hope you enjoy it :)

* * *

Chapter 15

Stephanie rolled onto her back and stared up at the ceiling. A faint shaft of moonlight peeked through the gap in the heavy curtains and her blue eyes settled on it as she began to wonder if she would ever find sleep tonight. She was beginning to think not. For hours now she had been tossing and turning feeling on edge and restless. Not that she should be surprised, not after what had happened tonight. The last thing in the world she had expected or had prepared herself for was Paul walking back into her life albeit briefly. Still, it was enough to send her whole world into a total spin. To say she was shocked when she saw him standing there tonight would be a total understatement. She had been overwhelmed by his presence. Her knees had felt like jelly and her hands had been shaking as she had stood there staring at him, her mind struggling to believe it was really him standing there right in front of her. But her heart didn't falter; it had felt him the second she had turned round and met those incredible brown eyes of his. It had also ached knowing that he hadn't been alone either.

Paul had obviously moved on and if she was honest with herself, it hurt. Not because she was stupid enough to believe that he wouldn't find someone else. Any woman in their right mind would take the chance to be with a wonderful man like him; well any woman but her. She'd blown her chance but that still didn't mean she didn't want to be the one standing by his side, holding his hand and introducing him to her friends, being a part of his life. But unfortunately, things could never turn out that way and it was no-one's fault, well no-one's fault but her own. She was the only one to blame for this whole entire mess. But God she loved Paul. She loved him so much and seeing him tonight had only proved that those feelings hadn't died. They probably never would. After all, Paul was her heart and it was a heart that would always belong to him and no-one else.

Feeling the tears burn her throat, Stephanie quickly blinked them back. As she shifted her head on the pillow, her body jumped slightly startled by the light knocking at her door. Her blue eyes darted to the small digital clock on the nightstand as she pushed herself up the bed and switched on the small lamp. The red luminous digits showed it was a little after one in the morning and she rolled her lips together thoughtfully. Who the hell would be at her door at this hour?

Pushing her hair back from her forehead, Stephanie swung her legs over the side of the bed and her bare feet padded across the plush patterned carpet as she wrapped her arms around herself feeling the slight chill in the room. As she stubbed her toe on the leg of a chair, she silently cursed Melissa who she suspected would be on the other side of the door. She had been reluctant to leave her alone earlier and was no doubt checking up on her for the third time tonight. Rubbing her bare arms as she turned the handle, Stephanie opened the door and was shocked into silence for the second time that night. The pair of warm familiar brown eyes stared back at her and she swallowed back the lump in her throat as she saw Paul standing there in the corridor. Her heart flipped in her chest as he raked his fingers through his long blonde strands and flashed a small, hesitant smile.

"Hey."

"Hey." she replied in a soft tone. Her shoulder leant against the doorframe as she watched him wondering why he was here and at the same time resisting the urge to pull him in her arms and feel him holding her once more. God, she had missed his touch. She had missed every single thing about him.

"Look I'm sorry. I know it's really late and all but I was wondering if we could talk?"

Stephanie nodded her head and stood aside to let him in.

Paul brushed past her briefly inhaling the faint scent of her perfume making his knees weak. He let out a calming breath as he stopped in the middle of the room trying his best to quell his anxiety. Really, he should have waited until morning to come here and talk to Stephanie but he couldn't do it. All night he had been pacing his room thinking of her and their child. It didn't help that he knew she was so close and inside the same building. Knowing she was in such close proximity killed him so his impulse to come here had eventually got the better of him. And now he was here, he knew he couldn't screw this up. This was far too important to him. Stephanie meant everything to him and he had to make her see that somehow, someway.

Pushing his blonde hair behind his left ear, he slowly turned to Stephanie feeling his heart pounding in his chest. God, she was simply breathtaking. He swallowed thickly as his eyes ran over her short black silk nightdress. Her soft tousled hair fell over her shoulders in waves. She looked so perfect, so beautiful and it was taking every ounce of restraint he had not to take her in his arms there and then. They were aching to feel her, to touch her. Lightly shaking his head, Paul brought himself to his senses clearing his throat. His lips twitched with his nervous smile as he lifted his shoulder in an apologetic shrug.

"Did I wake you?"

Stephanie smiled and shook her head. "I couldn't sleep."

His expression was gentle as he replied. "Me neither."

Their eyes settled on one another. Paul's mouth parted to say something but he quickly pressed his lips together. His throat was thick, his words lodged there. Just being so close to her mesmerised him. This woman had a power over him that he just couldn't explain; a power that was only ever one thing. It was love. He just had to pray that there was a chance Stephanie loved him back. That she meant every word she had told him in this very hotel three months ago. Shifting his feet nervously on the carpet, Paul smiled at her once more.

"You know I always wondered what I would say or how I would react if I ever saw you again. And every time I thought about it, I never pictured me standing there not able to say a damn word."

Stephanie let out a relieved laughter. She smiled back at him shyly clasping her fingers together as the tension between them slowly began to fade. "That's kind of how I felt tonight when I saw you. I just froze. I didn't know what to say."

Paul's expression was soft and warm and she felt the butterflies in her chest. God, she loved his smile. In fact, she loved everything about him. It was so hard to have him standing there so close yet unable to touch him when all she wanted to do was pull him into her arms and never let him go. Instead she gestured towards the sofa in the corner.

"Do you want to sit down?"

Paul nodded gratefully as he followed Stephanie over. His weight dipped the soft padded cushions as he sat down and he shifted his body to face her. His eyes couldn't help but be drawn to her long bare legs. Her nightdress had risen up considerably now they were sitting and it barely covered the tops of her thighs. Her skin was so soft and smooth. He could even remember how it felt. In fact, he remembered every touch and every whispered word they had shared. He had needed Stephanie so much and he still did. He had been kidding himself to think otherwise.

Feeling his desire burn in the pit of his stomach, Paul deliberately drew his eyes away and tilted his head up to see Stephanie watching him. He flushed with embarrassment as he realised she must have noticed him staring at her although if she did, she didn't show it. Instead she was smiling at him making him glow inside.

"So how long have you known Jennifer?" she asked him.

Paul's brow crinkled with his confusion at her line of questioning. "Steph, I'm not here to talk about Jennifer."

"So what are you here to talk about?"

Paul licked his lips and let out a silent breath. He wanted to make sure he did this right. He couldn't fuck it up. This whole conversation could determine the rest of his life. The only question was where the hell did he start? But as he looked into Stephanie's ocean blue eyes, he felt his anxiety slowly begin to slip away and the words he struggled to find earlier were suddenly slipping from his mouth.

"I guess it's no secret that the last three months have been hell for me."

Stephanie briefly glanced away feeling a pang of guilt in her chest. She knew she had hurt Paul with her actions. It just killed her even more to hear him say it. She clasped her hands in front of her as Paul continued.

"And I never kidded myself you know. I've never told myself I was able to get over you because quite honestly with the way I felt about you, that was never going to happen. Not in this lifetime. But I had thought I could move on and settle for a life where I could be happy. Okay, it might not be the life I wanted but I was prepared to settle for second best. At least I thought I was until tonight when I saw you standing there in front of me."

Stephanie looked up and Paul saw her eyes were glossed over with her tears. He instinctively reached across to comfort her taking her hand in his. He gave her a gentle smile as his thumb lightly grazed her knuckles.

"I love you Stephanie. You know that." he told her softly.

He saw the tears slip over Stephanie lashes and trickle down her cheek. His thumb lifted to lightly brush them away and it lingered there tenderly tracing her cheek.

"From the moment I saw you, I knew you were the one and I've been kidding myself trying to think I could live without you. I can't, Steph. I…..I just can't. Not any more."

Stephanie let out a strangled sob as the tears now fell freely down her face. She leaned her head into Paul's hand as it gently cupped her face.

"I love you too Paul. So much." she whispered.

She allowed herself to relish the feel of his touch for just a moment longer before she reluctantly brought her hand up to his and removed it from her face. As she glanced down at their joined hands resting on her lap, she briefly closed her eyes feeling the warmth of his skin. This felt so right but it was all so wrong. Her tears continued to fall and as she looked up into his beautiful brown pools, she was sure her heart was about to break all over again.

"But we can't be together. Not now. I'm so sorry."

Paul watched as she released his hand and stood up to walk across to the window. The painful expression on his face mirrored the pain he felt inside. He was hurt by her rejection but if he was honest with himself, he was expecting it. He knew Stephanie.. He knew she would think she had to do the right thing by her unborn child because she didn't have a clue that the baby she was carrying was his and not Shawn's. And although he wanted nothing more than to scream that he was the father, he knew he had to give Shawn the chance to tell her the truth. He owed him that much at least but his guilt wasn't going to stand in the way of being with the woman he loved more than anything.

Paul sighed softly as he stood up from the sofa. His footsteps were tentative as he crossed the room to stand behind Stephanie. His lifted his hand and it hovered for a second before gently touching her shoulder.

"Stephanie, I know about the baby."

He heard her gasp and felt her body instantly stiffen. He stepped back and watched her carefully as she slowly turned round to face him, her slender hand wiping the tears from her eyes.

"How did you find out?"

"Your friend told me when I was talking to her at the bar tonight."

Stephanie raised her brow in surprise. "Melissa?"

Paul lifted his shoulder in a shrug. "I don't know her name. She was getting an orange juice for a friend and when I asked her about it, she told me her friend was pregnant. It wasn't until later that I realised that friend was you." The left side of his mouth lifted in a smile as he placed his hands on her shoulders looking deeply into her eyes. "I still want us to be together Stephanie whether the baby is mine or not."

He watched Stephanie's face instantly fall as she broke away from him, stepping back and shaking her head, sniffing.

"The baby isn't yours Paul. I wish it was. I really do. But it's not. I'm sorry if you thought any differently."

"But what makes you so sure I'm not the father?"

Stephanie sighed and pushed back her hair. Her expression was sad as she looked at him. "Because I had my period after I got married which means only Shawn can be the father."

Paul pressed his lips together tightly as he tilted his head downwards knowing that couldn't be possible. Stephanie must have got her dates mixed up or something. There was no way Shawn was the father. The question was how on earth could he convince her that the baby she was carrying might be his without her getting suspicious? It's not like he knew much about women and pregnancies to know what to do or say right now. God, it would be so much easier if he could tell her about Shawn but that wasn't going to happen. Not now at least.

Paul looked at Stephanie once more immediately seeing the fresh tears in her eyes and without any hesitation at all, he crossed the short distance between them and took her in his arms. His big hand rubbed her back as he held her tightly, her body shaking with her sobs. He turned his head and whispered reassuringly in her ear.

"It's going to be okay Steph. Everything will work itself out, I promise you."

Stephanie buried her head in his chest as she held onto him just as tightly trying to find some solace in his words. But she wondered how Paul could be so sure. How could he know everything would be okay? Everything was such a mess and it was all her fault. All her reasons for marrying Shawn had seemed justified and valid at the time. Now they seemed unimportant and stupid as Paul held her in his arms. God, he felt so good. He felt like home.

Stephanie closed her eyes and breathed him in. His hand continued to rub her back soothing her. She eventually got her sobbing under control and exhaled a shaky breath. Lifting her head, she felt Paul loosen his arms around her. His brown eyes were concerned as he wiped her wet cheeks with the soft pad of his thumb.

"Are you o…..?"

Stephanie reached up placing her finger on his lips, silencing him. Her mouth replaced her finger as she reached up to press her lips against his. She began to kiss him deeply and the whole world seemed to slip away as her heart raced and Paul's tongue slid into her open mouth brushing over her tongue. The familiar taste of him made her knees tremble with longing and at that moment she was grateful that he was cupping her face otherwise there was every chance she would have melted to the floor. Stephanie sighed softly, her lips parting further allowing Paul to deepen the kiss, his tongue gently sweeping over her mouth causing her to feel every sensation to the tips of her fingers. Her whole body was awash with desire as her hands roamed over his massive back feeling the crisp cotton of his black shirt. They slowly dipped into the waistband of his trousers and she pulled him closer, pressing her body tightly against his and grinding her hips against him.

Paul let out low growl as he kissed her passionately. His need for her grew as Stephanie hands cupped his ass. There was no question that he wanted her and he wanted her so badly but he knew this was wrong. They couldn't do this right now no matter how badly he craved her; not when they hadn't even properly discussed their future. Hell, he didn't even know if they had one. Still, it didn't stop him from needing her. He needed Stephanie like the very air he breathed.

Paul swallowed thickly as her mouth moved from his trailing tiny kisses along his jaw line before her lips brushed over his neck, nipping and sucking at the column of his throat. His desire was blinding his senses and as her tongue flicked out to taste him, he knew he was in danger of losing his resolve. But he had to stop this. Things were complicated enough without adding fuel to the fire.

Somehow Paul found the willpower to break their embrace. When he opened his eyes, he could see the hurt expression on Stephanie's face as she began to move away from him. He quickly grabbed her arm and pulled her back towards him determined to make her understand.

"Please don't walk away, Steph."

"Look Paul, it's okay. You don't want me. I get it."

His brown eyes went wide with disbelief. "Are you crazy? Of course I want you. Christ, Steph, you don't know how many times I've imagined this moment. God knows I've thought about you constantly the last three months but I have to protect myself. Until I know where I stand with you, I can't do this."

He sighed softly and licked his lips as he looked into her eyes.

"The ball's in your court, Steph. I've told you how I feel. I want to have a life with you in it and that includes the baby whether I'm the father or not."

He saw Stephanie open her mouth to interrupt and he put his hand up to stop her.

"I know what you're about to say but please don't. You think Shawn is the father but I don't. That baby is mine Stephanie. I know it. I trust it. But even if it wasn't, I'd still want us to have a future together. I made a huge mistake when I let you marry Shawn that day. I should have fought harder for us. I should have convinced you that I could live without my friend but I couldn't live without you. And do you know what's so ironic about this whole thing? What makes it so insane? Your main reason for going ahead with the wedding was my friendship with Shawn but now it's ruined anyway. So what did marrying him really accomplish Stephanie? What did it achieve unless, of course, you're happy with Shawn?"

Stephanie bit down on her lip as she slowly shook her head. "How could I be Paul when all I think about is being with you. I want to be with you so much. You're all I think about every second of every day."

"Then why are we doing this to ourselves? Why can't we be together Steph?"

Stephanie lifted her shoulder in a shrug as her eyes drifted to the floor. "I don't know. Not anymore."

Paul smiled softly as he brushed her hair back from her forehead. He placed his finger under her chin and tilted her head up towards him. "You look tired. How about we sleep on this and we'll talk in the morning."

Stephanie nodded her head and closed her eyes as she felt Paul's lips brush against her forehead. He took hold of her hand and they walked in silence to the door. As he opened it, he pulled her into his arms and kissed the top of her head.

"I love you." He paused as his tender brown eyes scanned her face. "Goodnight Steph." he hushed.

Paul let go of her hand and was walking out of the door when Stephanie placed her own hand on his arm stopping him. He turned to face her to see her smiling back at him.

"I love you too Paul. I'll see you in the morning?"

He heard the hesitation in her voice as he smiled back reassuring her.

"Definitely. I don't intend on going anywhere without you. Not this time."

The door clicked shut behind him. Stephanie stared at it in wonderment, his words playing over in her head, her hand resting against the wood. She couldn't believe what had happened tonight. It was really beyond her wildest dreams. Paul still loved her and he wanted to be with her. God, he made it sound all so simple. And as Stephanie leant back and rested against the door, she wrapped her arms around herself and smiled and slowly began to think that just maybe it was.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Stephanie's eyes fluttered open as the loud knocking at the door awoke her from her slumber. Blinking in the bright daylight that filled the room, she shifted her head on the soft pillows groaning as she rolled to the side swinging her legs over the bed. Her body was still heavy and asleep as she shuffled in the direction of the door. Her slender hand stifled her yawn as she turned the handle and peered into the hallway, greeted by Melissa's warm smile. Her bleary blue eyes peered sharply at her. "You woke me up Mel. What time is it anyway?"

"Almost ten which means its time for your lazy ass to get up and dressed."

Stephanie's nose scrunched as she made a face at her friend and turned round. Melissa laughed as she followed on behind her into the hotel room.

"You've missed breakfast you know. You should have been up hours ago."

Stephanie's lips twitched with her grin as she pushed back her tousled hair from her face. "Yes Mom."

"Although I have to say this is most unlike you. You're usually the one that's up at the crack of dawn beating my door down."

Stephanie smiled as she rubbed at her eyes and sat down on the unmade bed. "If you must know I was wide awake until the crack of dawn. I couldn't sleep. I had a lot on my mind."

Melissa smiled back sympathetically and the bed lightly creaked underneath her weight as she took the space next to her gently patting her friend's leg. "I know seeing Paul last night shook you up badly and you've got every right to feel upset about it. But seeing him here, after all this time, it's a sign, Steph. I know it is and I know you have to talk to Paul. You can't just leave things the way they are between you."

Stephanie turned to her friend unable to stop the slow happy smile that crept across her face at the simple thought of him. "Well then, it's just as well I've already talked to him."

Melissa's brow furrowed before she jumped up from the bed and raking her fingers through her blonde hair, she saw Stephanie watch her with amusement. She pretended to scowl at her. "When did this happen and why didn't you call me straight after?"

Stephanie shook her head and laughed. "I didn't think you'd appreciate a phone call at three am in the morning.

"Three am?"

"Yeah." She licked her lips lifting her shoulder in a shrug. "After you left last night, Paul came to see me and we talked a little."

Melissa grinned as she sat down once more. "And did you just talk or were other activities involved?"

Stephanie dryly rolled her eyes at her friend's bluntness. "We talked Mel. Nothing else happened." She paused for a second as a shy smile twitched at the corner of her lips and her hands smoothed down the hem of her nightdress. "Unless, of course, you take into account the kiss."

Melissa gasped in excitement and clutched her hands. "You kissed him!"

"Calm down Mel. It was just a kiss."

Her friend shook her head adamantly. "But was it just a kiss between Romeo and Juliet? I don't think so!"

Stephanie stared back in disbelief. "I cannot believe you are comparing me and Paul to Romeo and Juliet! Mel, have you gone mad?"

Melissa pressed her lips together as she shrugged her shoulders. "I was only trying to make a point. Your kiss with Paul was a big deal. Now all I need to know is did you guys sort things out or not?"

Stephanie sighed as she briefly glanced down at the floor. She'd gone over their conversation a million times in her head. Paul had made her decision seem so simple but in the cold light of day, that decision was anything but. Still, she didn't know if she could be without Paul another second. For too long, she'd been walking around in a haze lost, hurt and confused. Now seeing him again, it was like this fog had been lifted and she'd found herself again; she'd found what was inside her heart. But unfortunately her love for Paul wasn't the only factor in the choice she had to make. Sighing softly, Stephanie lifted her head brushing her hair behind her ears. Melissa's brown eyes watched her carefully.

"Paul told me he wanted to be with me and the baby. Basically the ball is in my court. I've got to make a decision. Paul or Shawn." she explained.

Melissa rubbed her shoulder smiling at her reassuringly. "Then there's really no decision to make then, is there?"

Stephanie pressed her lips together sadly and sighed once more. "Of course there is Mel. I'm married to Shawn and I'm having his baby. Surely I have to take that into account?"

Her friend shook her head sadly. "Steph, you're miserable and so is Shawn. You're not doing him any favours by continuing with your marriage, you know. And yes, he'll be hurt at first but as the weeks go by and he gets through the pain, he'll probably be relieved. He deserves the chance to be happy but with someone who really loves him, not someone who is with him only through a sense of loyalty."

"I know you're right but what about the baby? How can I take his child away from him?" Stephanie sighed.

"Steph, there are millions of children all over the world whose parents aren't together. It doesn't mean their relationships with their fathers or mothers stop. Shawn can still see his child. He can still be a part of his or her life."

Her lips curved up slowly. "You and Paul make it all sound so simple."

"It is. Well the actual decision anyway. See that's the simple part. Actually going ahead with it and leaving Shawn is going to be the tough part but you'll have Paul and me by your side to pick up the pieces. You can do this Steph. I know you can."

Stephanie pulled Melissa into her arms as she gave her a hug. "What would I do without you?"

Melissa smiled as she released her. "I dread to think. But luckily for you, you'll never find out." She stood up from the bed taking hold of Stephanie's arm and pulling her up with her. "Now you need to go and get dressed and look beautiful. You've got a gorgeous man waiting for you and you need to go and tell him in no uncertain terms that you love him and you want to be with him."

Stephanie grinned and feeling her heart flip in her chest, she made her way towards the bathroom. For the first time in what seemed like forever, she felt like this huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. God, she felt so happy right now she could burst. She'd made her decision and she felt so free. She felt so in love. Now all she had to do was find Paul and tell him she needed to be with him and didn't want to spend one more second without him.

* * *

Stephanie applied her lipstick and rolling her lips together, she stood back admiring her reflection. She actually didn't look half bad for someone who had gotten very little sleep. There were slight shadows under her eyes but they were hidden by her make-up and if she wasn't mistaken, her skin had this glow to it. Maybe it was true what they said about pregnant women. But all thoughts about her skin disappeared as she heard the knock at the door. She felt the butterflies in her chest knowing it was Paul. He had phoned her room fifteen minutes ago to ask if he could see her. It had taken everything she had not to shout her decision down the phone. Instead she had appeared calm and collected telling him to come up and had been anxiously waiting ever since.

Glancing once more in the mirror, Stephanie ran her tongue across her teeth. She let out a calming breath as she crossed the room feeling her heart race in her chest. It skipped a beat when she opened the door and saw Paul standing in front of her. He literally stole her breath away looking all kinds of gorgeous in a white cotton shirt. It hung over the waistband of his jeans and the top buttons were loose. His blonde hair looked so soft too as it fell around his shoulders and as he smiled at her, she had to bite down on her lip to stop the grin that threatened to erupt across her face. God, she felt so happy right now she could burst.

"So are you going to invite me in or are you just going to stand there and check me out some more?"

Stephanie felt her cheeks flush with heat knowing she had obviously been caught in the act. Paul's face flickered with amusement as he brushed past her but as he stopped just in front of her, his expression turned serious as his fingers lifted to lightly trace her cheek.

"You look beautiful Steph." he hushed.

As she breathed in the scent of his cologne, she allowed her lips to curve up gently and knew that she was fighting a losing battle to contain her happiness. Paul's brown eyes lingered on hers for a second before he dropped his hand and walked into the room. She closed the door over and the blood was beating in her ears as she crossed the short distance between them. However, she managed to appear outwardly calm and even playful as she reached up and began to toy with the collar of his shirt.

"So I want you to know I've made my decision."

As her ocean blue eyes looked into his, Paul swallowed thickly. His heart raced as her words registered in his head and watched as Stephanie looked up at him and gave him a smile; a smile that rendered him completely helpless. It was also a smile that told him everything he needed to know and more. Any doubts he had left about their future together quickly slipped away. Still, he needed to hear her say the words, anything to make this all the more real for him. God knows he had waited for this moment for so long and as his lips twitched with his own smile, Paul decided he would play along and humour her. "Oh you have, have you?"

"Yes." Stephanie told him as her hand curled around his neck and tilting her head to the side, she breathed into his left ear. "Do you want to know what it is?"

Paul's smile faded and he briefly closed his eyes as Stephanie's fingers threaded through his hair drawing his face towards her. As their foreheads rested together, he felt her warm breath on his face and could smell the floral scent of her hair. Her touch burned his skin as her right hand rested on his chest and he wondered if she could feel his heart beating right out of it. It was a heart that had been broken without her and now only felt whole again being here with her. All he had ever wanted was Stephanie in his life. She was all he needed.

Paul's eyes flickered open. Her ocean blue pools were watching him and he found himself drowning in the love and the emotion he saw in them. They also lightly glistened with her regret and her tears.

"It's you. It always has been. I love you so much and I never should have let you go. I never should have married Shawn knowing the way I felt about you. I was just so scared, you know."

Stephanie paused as she pressed her lips together and pushed back the lump in her throat. She felt Paul's arms slide around her waist and she rested her head on his shoulder relishing the feel of him next to her as she sighed into him.

"I guess it was the easy way out. I just didn't want to hurt or upset anyone but I ended up hurting you and hurting myself. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry I put you through all that and I swear I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you if you can just find a way to forgive me."

Stephanie slowly lifted her head and Paul's expression was gentle as his hand lifted and his fingers lightly traced her cheek.

"As far as I'm concerned, there's nothing to forgive." he told her.

His warm lips softly brushed over hers, and Stephanie closed her eyes feeling a solitary tear slip over her lashes and trickle down her face. Her glossy eyes stared back at him as his thumb lifted to tenderly wipe it away.

"I don't deserve you." she whispered.

Paul's expression was stern as he shook his head. "We're not doing this. We're not placing blame any more Steph. What's happened has happened. It's in the past. All I'm concerned about is us and our future together."

Stephanie smiled back at him gratefully and as Paul pulled her into his arms, she breathed him in nestling against his chest.

"You know if you want me to, I'll be there with you when you tell Shawn."

Stephanie sighed and lifted her head to glance up at him. "Thank you but that's something I need to do on my own. I owe him that much."

Paul nodded and pressed his lips together thoughtfully. "Okay, but do you mind if I come to New York with you? I think I owe Shawn an explanation too, that and I want to be there with you Steph. I don't want you going through this alone. It's going to be hard on everyone especially you and you've got the baby to think of."

Stephanie nodded her head. "Of course I want you with me. I'm going to need you there." She paused as she shifted in his arms and facing him she took his big hand in hers, her thumb lightly grazing his knuckles. "Besides, weren't you the one that said you wouldn't go anywhere without me?"

"I did and I meant it. You're totally stuck with me now. Do you think you can handle that?"

Stephanie's lips lifted in a grin. "Oh I think so."

Paul grinned back and pulled her closely to him. Holding Stephanie felt like home and he was on cloud nine knowing they were finally going to be together. It was all he had wanted; this woman was all he had ever needed to feel complete. Still, his happiness over Stephanie was tinged with his guilt over Shawn. He was like a noose hanging over their heads and he would be glad once they came clean and told him the truth. Only then could they move on and start the rest of their life together; him, Stephanie and their child and he sure as hell liked the sound of that.


	17. Chapter 17

I had a couple of requests for the next chapter so seeing the story is written already, I thought I'd say thanks for all your lovely comments and post the next installment. You know I wrote this story a long time ago and it's not until you read it back that you realise how soap operaish it all is lol. Anyway I hope you enjoy this one :)

* * *

Chapter 17

The low ringing filled the small living room. Paul lifted the cushions on the sofa as he searched for his phone and eventually finding it tucked down the side, he glanced at the lit up screen. He shook his head and rolled his lips together thoughtfully when he saw it was Kevin. The guy always did have an uncanny knack for knowing when something was about to go down and he would find that amusing if he wasn't still pissed at the guy for not telling him about the pregnancy beforehand. Because it had been a pretty big secret to keep from him. Yet on the other hand, he understood the predicament Kevin was in. After all he was Shawn's best friend too and this whole situation had put him firmly between a rock and a hard place. And as well as that, he would never forget the fact that the guy had been there for him at a time when he had needed him the most. Kevin had stopped him from pressing the self destruct button on his life and if it wasn't for him, he was pretty sure he wouldn't be here now about to start on a new chapter of his life with the woman he loved more than anything. So really he had no right to stay angry with him. That and he was in way too good a mood to be pissed off right now. So he was going to let Kevin off the hook this time.

His mind made up, Paul brought the phone to his ear answering the call. "Hey Kev, what's up?"

"So you're still alive then! Where the hell have you been, man? I've been calling you for the last two days."

"Awww! Have you been worried about me?" he taunted.

Kevin frowned down the phone, his friend's playful tone immediately raising his suspicions. Because he hardly expected Paul to be talking to him at all let alone be joking around with him. "You know damn well I've been worried considering the conversation we had the last time I spoke to your sorry ass. Paul, what's going on?"

Paul raked his fingers through his blonde strands and sighed as he walked over to look out the window of Melissa's apartment. Although his brown eyes focused on the busy streets below, he wasn't paying them any attention. His mind was too occupied with what he was about to tell Kevin. "Stephanie's leaving him Kev."

He heard the heavy sigh at the other end of the phone and there was silence for a few seconds as Kevin took in the news.

"When?" he asked.

"Today. We just got back from Boston this morning and she headed straight over there."

"So I take it you're in New York with her?"

Paul folded one arm over his chest as he leant against the wooden window frame. "Yeah. I wasn't letting her deal with this on her own plus I kind of owe it to Shawn to talk to him myself at some point."

"I guess you do. Does Stephanie know about the baby?"

"No. I think Shawn should be the one to tell her he's not the father. Not me."

Kevin's sigh crackled down the line. "You're right I suppose although I think it will be the last thing on his mind once Stephanie tells him their marriage is over." There was a pause and some movement on the other end before Kevin spoke once more. "Paul, I'm coming to New York straight away. I just think someone should be there for Shawn. He's going to be devastated when he finds out."

Paul lifted his head from the glass and nodded. "I know."

His brown eyes were understanding as he lightly scratched at his beard and the truth was, he had expected Kevin to make that decision anyway. As one of his best friends, actually his only best friend now, it would come as second nature to him to want to help out Shawn. After all, he had been there for Kevin too no questions asked when he needed him.

"I'm not taking sides here Paul. You know that don't you."

"Of course I do." said Paul as he wandered away from the window, his feet slowly pacing the carpet. "Kev, I totally understand you wanting to be there for Shawn. I wouldn't want him to have to deal with any of this on his own. I mean I know myself how much it means to have someone there for you when your world comes crashing down even if you don't necessarily appreciate it at the time."

"I know what you mean." Kevin agreed also knowing that feeling all too well especially after his wife had left him. If it wasn't for Paul and Shawn, he would have literally fallen apart at the seams. "I'm happy for you Paul. I really am. I've seen the pain you've gone through the last few months and I'm glad it's finally working out for you."

Paul's smile was sad. "Thanks man but still doesn't stop me feeling like the biggest dick in the world right now. I never meant to hurt Shawn, you know. Falling for Stephanie just happened and you can't help who you fall in love with."

"I know Paul and he'll get over Stephanie. He will. It will just take time. Listen, I'd better go. I'm going to see if I can get a flight arranged for today. I'll call you later and let you know my plans."

"Okay. I'll talk to you then."

Paul hung up and tossing his phone down on the sofa, he threw himself on the cushions. They dipped underneath his weight as he leant forward, resting his elbows on his thick thighs. His mind automatically turned to Stephanie and he wondered if she had spoken to Shawn yet. Probably not. She had only left the apartment half an hour ago but still it had felt like an eternity to him.

Paul closed his eyes and pushing his fingers through his hair, he held his head in hands and sighed. He just prayed that she would be okay and that she would make it through unscathed. Stephanie had tried to convince him several times that she would be but he just wasn't so sure. He had an uneasy feeling in his stomach that something was going to happen. Shawn wouldn't let her go without a fight and God only knows where that could lead. The uncertainty of that was killing him and the sooner it was all over the better.

* * *

Stephanie unlocked the door and walked into the apartment. She was greeted with silence as she placed her bag on the ground, apprehensively entering the living room. Her blue eyes went wide when she saw the state of the place. There were glasses and dishes and takeaway cartons littering the entire floor. Shawn obviously hadn't bothered to take care of the place while she was gone, not that she was surprised. He never had been the most domesticated of people.

Stephanie sighed and quickly glancing around her, she began to pick up the glasses from the table but visibly jumped, startled by the familiar voice behind her.

"Well. Look who's finally decided to come home."

Stephanie turned round slowly to see Shawn standing at the doorway of the kitchen. He was leaning against the doorframe and had his arms folded across his chest.

She licked her lips as her heart hammered in her chest.

"You scared me Shawn. I didn't think you were here."

"You mean you hoped I wasn't."

Stephanie said nothing and turned back round to pick up another glass. She heard Shawn's footsteps on the wooden floor as he walked towards her.

"So Boston must have been fun considering your overnight stay turned into three days."

Stephanie lifted her shoulder in a shrug and continued to tidy up. "Melissa wanted to take in a couple of sights and do some shopping. She doesn't get the chance to go away very often and she wanted to make the most of it."

"And I'll bet you just jumped at the chance to stay away that little bit longer."

Stephanie whirled round to face him, her blue eyes flashing with her irritation. "Well is it any wonder? Look at what I come home to."

Shawn scowled back at her. "Do you mean the mess or do you mean me?"

She paused for a beat before deciding to be brutally honest. "Both."

Her husband snorted and shook his head. "Don't hold back on my account Stephanie. It's nice to know how you really feel."

"Well do you blame me? We haven't been getting along in ages. We hardly talk and when we do, it's usually to argue about something."

"And whose fault is that? It sure as hell wasn't me that wanted to abort our child!" he shouted.

Stephanie shook her head in disgust and brushed past Shawn into the kitchen. She felt her anger rush through her veins. She just couldn't believe he had thrown that back in her face. In a fit of rage, she threw the dirty glasses in the sink and one of them shattered at the impact.

"Shit!" she exclaimed as her fingers reached in to pick out the pieces of glass from the sink.

"What's wrong Steph? Can't handle the truth?"

Stephanie looked round to see Shawn sneering at her. Any guilt she felt at what she was about to do to him quickly began to dissolve. "Look at you standing there being all judgemental. Just who the hell do you think you are?"

"I'm your husband! Although most of the time you don't seem to remember that!" he shouted back.

"Don't you dare raise your voice at me!"

"Why not! It's the truth. Face it Steph, ever since we got back from our honeymoon, this marriage has been a sham. Hell, even on our honeymoon there was something wrong. You don't touch me. We haven't had sex in God knows how long."

Stephanie placed her hands on her hips and glared back at him. "Is that all that matters to you? Sex!"

Shawn shook his head. "Of course not but you've got to admit there's something seriously wrong when your own wife wants nothing to do with you."

There was silence for a second as Stephanie felt a pang of guilt in her chest and she focused on the sink unable to look Shawn in the eye. His next words hit her like a tonne of bricks.

"Who is he?"

She closed her eyes and let out a shaky breath. Shawn obviously suspected something was going on but how could he know? Unless he didn't actually know for certain and he was just putting two and two together. But no matter what he suspected, it was time to come clean. The lies and deceit had gone on for long enough and it was time for it to end. Turning to face Shawn, Stephanie looked him in the eye, her own blue pools expressing her unspoken apology.

"It's someone I met through work."

Shawn clenched his fists and turned away from her. She guiltily looked back down at the kitchen counter and tried to tell herself she wasn't lying to him. After all she had met Paul while she was away on business so it was partly true. She just couldn't tell him the whole story. She had promised Paul she would let him do it. He felt he owed Shawn that much at least.

"So how long has it been going on?"

Stephanie swallowed thickly pushing back the lump in her throat and glanced up to see Shawn glaring at her. "I met him a month or so before we got married."

Her husband snorted in disbelief. "You've been seeing him all this time?"

"No." she stressed shaking her head adamantly. "I ended things before our wedding."

"Have you seen him since?"

Stephanie felt the hot tears sting her eyes. She looked at Shawn and slowly nodded her head, the pain in his eyes only increasing her guilt over hurting him. "This weekend. It was the first time I'd seen him in over three months."

Shawn briefly glanced away. When his eyes met hers once more a moment later, she could see the unshed tears glistening there. "So here I was sitting at home trying to think of ways to save our marriage and you're off screwing your fancy piece."

"It wasn't like that Shawn. I didn't know he was going to be there. I promise you."

"And why should I believe you Stephanie? Huh?"

"Because it's the truth." she cried, her hand wiping at the tears that had escaped from her lashes. "I'm sorry Shawn." she sniffed. "I didn't plan for any of this to happen you know."

Shawn snorted. "And your apology is supposed to make me feel better is it?"

"Of course not. Shawn, I never wanted to hurt you."

"Maybe not but you have. You know it's going to take a lot for me to forgive you and trust you again. You've betrayed me Stephanie. It's going to take time for me to get over that."

As he began to pace the kitchen, Stephanie watched him in a state of stunned shock. Shawn was clearly upset but he seemed pretty calm for a guy that had just found out his wife was cheating on him. Not only that, it sounded like he thought they could continue with their marriage. Was he crazy? They couldn't go on like this. It was over. It had to be for both their sakes. Now all she needed was the courage to find the words to tell him. Clearing her throat, she clasped her hands together in front of her.

"Shawn, I'm sorry but I can't do this any more. We can't do this."

Shawn stopped and looked at her, confused. "What do you mean by that?"

"Our marriage is over Shawn." She paused as she let out a sad, shaky breath. "I want a divorce."

Shawn clenched his jaw, his eyes cold as they stared at her. "Oh no, you don't." he spat as his long finger pointed in her direction. "You're not walking away from this. You're carrying my baby in case you've forgotten and if you think for one second I'm letting you take my child away from me, you've got another thing coming."

Stephanie quickly shook her head. "Shawn, I would never take your child away from you, ever. But surely you can see that there's no future here. Not between us."

He crossed the short distance between them reaching to grip her shoulders tightly. His eyes mirrored the desperate, pleading expression on his face. "Why not Stephanie? Please! I love you and I want us to be a family."

"But I don't love you Shawn." she blurted out. "Not any more."

She saw Shawn swallow hard and take a step back from her. His arms dropped to hang by his sides as he looked at her with a solemn expression. "Please Stephanie. Don't do this. Stay. I'm begging you."

"I can't." she whispered as the tears welled in her eyes.

But her sadness turned to fear as Shawn pushed her away and his face crumpled into an ugly snarl.

"You fucking whore!" he shouted. "You've taken everything we had and thrown it back in my face! Well, you're not going to get away with it. You think you're going to walk out here and live happily ever after with that bastard you've been seeing behind my back. Well it's not going to happen. No man is going to raise my child as their own."

Stephanie's breath caught in her throat as Shawn began to pace the floor in front of her. Her hands were trembling as she quickly glanced at the door trying to figure out the easiest way to escape. She needed to get the hell out of here and fast. She had never seen Shawn angry like this and she was starting to feel a bit scared. Why the hell hadn't she listened to Paul when he had told her he wanted to come here with her? Why the hell hadn't she let him protect like her like he had asked her to?

Just then Shawn cursed angrily under his breath and glancing at the door once more, Stephanie decided to make a run for it. There was no point in staying here any longer. Nothing was going to get resolved now, at least not until they both had the chance to calm down. She stepped away from the sink before she lost her resolve and scurried towards the door. She let out a cry as she felt Shawn grip her arm tightly pulling her towards him.

"Where do you think you're going?" he asked her, his face flickering with his simmering rage.

Stephanie squirmed underneath his grip as the pain shot through her arm. "Shawn, please. You're hurting me."

Shawn pulled her even tighter against him. "What? Like you've hurt me? Believe me the pain you are feeling is nothing compared to what you've done to me."

She felt the tears burn her eyes as his fingers pressed into her skin even harder. "Let go of me Shawn!"

"Why should I? You're only going to run straight to him aren't you?"

Stephanie looked away and tried not to focus on the pain. However she let out a strangled cry as he tugged violently on her arm.

"Answer me damn it!"

She slowly nodded her head and was taken with surprise when she felt his grip subside. The blood began to flow once more making her arm throb but that was the last thing on her mind as she turned towards the door. But before she even had time to think about walking through it, she fell to the ground as she felt Shawn's fist connect with her face. The pain ripped through her jaw and the hot tears sprung to her eyes as her cheek started to burn. She cupped it with her hand and bit down on her lip determined not to cry in front of him.

When she eventually composed herself and looked up, she saw Shawn standing over her frozen to the spot. He appeared shocked as he watched her get to her feet.

"I'm so sorry Stephanie. I didn't mean to do it."

Stephanie felt her knees tremble as she managed to straighten herself up. She wiped the tears from her eyes as she turned around and walked out of the kitchen without saying a single word. Her heart hammered in her chest as she practically sprinted through the living room grabbing her bag on the way and it was only once she was out of the door and in the hallway that she let out a sob. However, she never faltered in her steps as she made her way towards the elevator frantically pushing the buttons. She kept glancing in the direction of the apartment half expecting Shawn to come after her but he never did. Eventually the elevator doors slid open and Stephanie rushed inside, her bottom lip trembling. It was only once she was on her way to the bottom floor that she slumped against the elevator wall and began to let out the tears she'd so bravely held inside.

* * *

Melissa emerged from the kitchen balancing her coffee cup in her hand. She cautiously took a sip as she watched Paul continue to pace up and down the living room. He was still on edge and obviously worried and it was no wonder. Stephanie had been gone for over four hours now and they hadn't heard a single word. Three times she'd had to persuade Paul not to go after her but if he made an attempt to go over to the apartment again, Melissa had decided she wouldn't stand in his way. She was starting really worry now despite telling herself things were absolutely fine. But the longer Stephanie was gone, the harder it was to be optimistic. Placing her coffee cup on the window ledge, she sighed softly. "She'll be alright Paul."

Paul stopped pacing and when he turned to face her, there was no masking the concern in his deep brown eyes. It was the same concern she'd been feeling all day.

"I hope so but if she's not back in the next five minutes, I'm going over there and you can't stop me this time."

Melissa nodded and took a few steps towards him, stuffing her hands in her jeans pockets. She decided to change the subject in an attempt to lighten the mood and take their minds of things. "I'm so glad she bumped into you at that book launch you know."

Paul managed a tight smile despite his anxiety over Stephanie. "Me too. Although I couldn't actually believe my eyes when I saw her standing there in front of me."

"I could tell that by the shocked expression on your face. You looked like you'd seen a ghost." Melissa chuckled lightly.

He smiled and his lips parted to reply when he heard the doorbell ring. He watched with a tentative breath as Melissa went to answer it. His heart flipped madly in his chest when he heard her shout her name and his shoulders slumped with relief.

"Stephanie! Thank God you're here."

Paul quickly walked across the room and met Stephanie coming through the door. He said nothing and pulled her straight into his arms, holding her to him tightly inhaling the sweet scent of her perfume. "Thank God you're back. Are you okay?"

He released her and stepped back to look at her. His heart broke when he realised she had been crying. Her face was blotchy and her eyes were puffy and red. He lifted his hand and tenderly brushed back her hair from her face. That was when he saw the dark bruising and his eyes widened in shock. Stephanie winced slightly as his finger touched it and his face twisted in anger.

"Did he do this to you?" he asked her.

Stephanie slowly nodded her head. Paul immediately tried to walk away but she quickly grabbed his arm to stop him. "Paul, no. Please don't go over there." she pleaded with him.

"He's not getting away with this, Steph. He can't go around hitting you. You're pregnant for Christ sakes!"

Stephanie grabbed his hands and held them tightly, scared to let him go. "Please Paul, not tonight. You can go over there tomorrow but right now I need you here with me, okay?" Her blue eyes frantically searched his face and she tugged on his hands to get his attention. "Okay?" she repeated.

Paul reluctantly nodded his head as she wrapped her arms around him. She held him tightly as she buried her face in his neck and began to cry. He closed his eyes as he rocked her gently feeling her body shake with her frightened breaths and tears. He couldn't believe she had been through this. He couldn't believe that Shawn had fucking hit her. What the hell had he been thinking?

Paul clenched his jaw tightly trying to control his rage because it was taking everything he had not to go over there and beat the living crap out of Shawn. Sure he may have been angry and upset when Stephanie told him their marriage was done but that was no excuse for hitting a woman, never mind a pregnant one. One thing was for sure, this wasn't over, not by a long shot. He was going to kill Shawn when he got his hands on him and that was going to be sooner rather than later.

* * *

Paul stroked Stephanie's face gently and kissed her forehead. She looked so calm and peaceful in her slumber that he was almost reluctant to leave her but he would only be gone from her side for a little while. She wouldn't even realise he was gone.

Carefully pulling back the covers, Paul got out of bed rummaging around for his clothes, using the white rays of moonlight as his guide. He quickly found them and pulled them on before tip-toeing out of the room making sure not to waken Stephanie. He'd have hell to pay if he did. He had promised her again tonight he wouldn't go round there but he simply couldn't leave it any longer. His rage was making him restless and he knew it was time to tell Shawn the whole truth and not only that, time for him to pay for hurting the woman that he loved….


	18. Chapter 18

Apparently it was cruel to leave off where I did yesterday so here is another chapter to tide you over. And thanks again for all your feedback. It's really appreciated and definitely the kick up the backside us writers need to keep updating! :)

* * *

Chapter 18

Paul bounced from foot to foot impatiently as he stood outside the red apartment door. His fist pounded on the wood a second time wondering if Shawn was even inside. If he wasn't, it wouldn't matter. He'd be here waiting for him, all night if that's what it took. Better yet, he'd go and find him. No doubt he would be holed up in the nearest bar somewhere feeling sorry for himself. He knew Shawn. He knew he would be beating himself up over what he had done to Stephanie. Well, he was in for even bigger beating once he got his hands on him.

Glaring at the door for a few seconds longer, Paul was about to leave when he heard the rattle of the chain. His brown eyes flashed with his rage as he spun round to see Shawn appear through the crack. Shawn's face instantly lifted with surprise as he saw his friend standing there.

"Paul! Jesus Christ man, where have you been?"

Paul's reply was physical as his fist connected with his face. His lips curled in a vicious snarl as Shawn straightened up and wiped the blood from his cut lip. He looked at Paul with fury in his eyes.

"What the fuck did you hit me for?"

"You know, I'm pretty sure Stephanie wanted to ask you the same question earlier."

Shawn's brow wrinkled with amazement. "How the hell do you know?"

"I saw the bruise Shawn." Paul's stance was menacing as he took a couple of steps nearer, his fists clenched by his sides as he resisted the urge to hit him once more. "So tell me. Did it make you feel better hitting a defenceless woman?"

Shawn moved backwards as Paul's icy glare started to unnerve him. "No it didn't but the bitch deserved it. Did you know she's been screwing someone else behind my back? Fucking whore!"

Shawn felt the pain shoot through his face once more as Paul hit him and he fell against the wall in the hallway. Rubbing his jaw, he looked at Paul in total confusion.

"What is going on here, man? How the hell do you know about what happened today and why the fuck do you keep taking cheap shots at me?"

Paul walked over and stood in front of Shawn, his body towering over him and his nostrils flaring with his anger. "Like I told you earlier, I saw the bruises on Stephanie's face hence my desire to rearrange yours. I also don't appreciate you calling her a whore."

"And what does it matter to you what I call her?" retorted Shawn as the heel of his hand wiped at his lip once more. "You hardly know Stephanie. And another thing that's confusing me here is the fact that no-one's heard from you in months and then all of a sudden you just show up and decide to defend my wife's honour. Why is that?"

Paul looked away, briefly glancing at the floor for a second as his anger slipped away and his guilt got the better of him. He wasn't proud that the woman he couldn't live without was the same someone Shawn had wanted to spend the rest of his life with. But he had no regrets. How could he regret anything when he'd never felt more happy or alive in his entire life. Stephanie completed him. She was carrying their child. He loved her, heart and soul and if that meant sacrificing everything else in his life, including Shawn's friendship, then it was a price he was willing to pay. Stephanie meant more to him than life itself and he wasn't prepared to settle for less.

Lifting his eyes, Paul ran his fingers through his hair and exhaling slowly, he looked at Shawn. "I love her." he confessed softly. "I'm in love with Stephanie."

Shawn's mouth parted as he stood there gob smacked. His brow furrowed with confusion as he tried to piece it all together. "It's you?"

He nodded his head. "I met her in Boston. I didn't know who she was until I met her at Benny's that night."

Shawn could only shake his head in stunned amazement. "You….you've been sleeping with my wife?"

"Not since you got married and I never saw her again until this weekend. I was at the book launch at Boston."

Shawn pushed himself off the wall and glared at him. "So I guess now you're going to tell me you're sorry huh? Well forget it. You can stick you apology up your ass! You're a fucking bastard Levesque and you know what? You and that whore deserve one another."

This time it was Paul's turn to stagger backwards as Shawn swung his fist at his face. He saw black as the pain ripped through his cheekbone. When he managed to straighten himself up, he saw his ex-best friend standing sneering at him. He sniffed and lifted his shoulder in a shrug. "I don't blame you for doing that. I deserved it. I was just wondering what took you so long."

"Don't act all fucking righteous with me you sanctimonious prick!"

Shawn launched himself at Paul and threw him to the ground. His fist connected with Paul's face a couple of times before he felt a hand grip him firmly and pull him off. Shawn looked up in surprise to see Kevin standing in his apartment.

"Leave him alone Shawn. Fighting's not going to solve anything."

"He deserves it! Do you know what he's done?"

Shawn watched as Kevin looked away. His face was a dead giveaway and he now knew exactly why he was here. His eyes glared at his friend in disgust. "Have you known what was going on all along?"

"Kev knew nothing until I spoke to him this morning."

Shawn whirled round to look at Paul who was now standing next to Kevin. Despite his anger he was able to take some satisfaction from the red mark across his face. "Who asked you for your fucking opinion?" he spat.

Paul shook his head and snorted. "No-one but I don't want you ripping into Kev for no reason. He came here because I called him today to tell him what had been going on. He's here for you man so back off him!"

"You're such a considerate friend aren't you Paulie? Shame you didn't think of that before you screwed my wife."

Paul sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "Look I'm sorry for hurting you. I fucked up. I know that more than anyone. But I love her Shawn and I'm not prepared to live without her."

"Over my dead body. Now get the fuck out of here. I never want to see your fucking face again."

Paul pressed his lips together smugly. "Fine by me!"

He turned to leave but he stopped halfway and turned round to be met by a hateful glare. It didn't deter him though as he issued his ultimatum pointing his finger in Shawn's direction. "One last thing. You tell Stephanie the baby's not yours or I will."

Paul turned and walked out of the apartment without another glance in his direction. As the door clicked shut behind him, he breathed a sigh of relief glad that finally the truth was out and his relationship with Stephanie was no longer a guilty little secret. There had never been an easy way of telling Shawn but at least now he had Kevin to look out for him. Still, he couldn't help but feel a little sad and his relief was tinged with regret. He'd lost his best friend and he'd be lying to himself if he pretended not to be hurt by that but it would have hurt him even more to lose Stephanie. Being without her just wasn't an option for him. It never really had been, not when it meant living without his heart.

* * *

Stephanie began to awake from her slumber. Shifting against the mattress, she opened her eyes and smiled to herself as she became aware of Paul's arm flung across her waist. He felt so warm and safe spooned against her; like her very own security blanket. It just felt so good to wake up lying next to him, her back against his chest securely cocooned in his arms. This was what she had wanted; these were the moments she had dreamed about when she thought of him the last few months. And it was those dreams and those thoughts of Paul that had carried her through all the pain and the heartache she had felt without him.

Still, the pain she felt had been no-one's fault but her own. Staying with Shawn had been a mistake; a big, huge horrible mistake. Thank God, she'd finally found the strength to end things with him. But she still cared about him and she hated the thought that she had hurt him by telling him the truth yesterday. But she didn't have a choice in the matter. Not if she wanted to be with Paul.

Turning her head to drop a kiss on his large bicep, Stephanie sighed into the soft cotton pillowcase. She had hurt Paul too and out of everything, that was her biggest regret. She loved him so much and it killed her to know she had caused him so much pain. But she had to stop thinking that way. Melissa had told her last night not to dwell on the past and to move forward. She had been right and that was exactly what she intended to do and she would do it with Paul by her side. For the first time in a long time, she was embracing her future.

Just then Paul mumbled incoherently in his sleep and Stephanie smiled softly. Shifting carefully in his arms, she slowly turned to face him trying her best not to disturb him. His messy blonde strands fell across his face and Stephanie lifted her hand to tenderly tuck them behind his ear. Slowly her smile faded as she saw the dark purple bruising adorning his right cheek. There would be no need to ask him where the bruises had come from. Paul had obviously gone to visit Shawn when she had specifically asked him not to. Feeling her anger bubble to the surface, she threw his arm off her as she pulled herself up off the bed. Stephanie no longer cared about disturbing him as she threw the curtains open and looking back over, she took a small amount of satisfaction from seeing his face screw up as the bright rays of the morning sun shone into the room. She heard his thick groan as she began pacing up and down the room. A moment later, it was followed by his deep gravelled tone signalling Paul was wide awake.

"You know, you'll wear a hole in the floor if you keep doing that."

Stephanie's blue eyes were disappointed as they flashed at him. "How could you do it Paul? How could you go over there and see Shawn when you promised me you would stay here last night."

Paul sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair, pushing back his blonde strands from his face. Propping himself up against the pillows, he fixed the covers around the waist, lifting his shoulder in a shrug. "I couldn't sleep. I just kept thinking what he'd done to you and I got so angry I had to go over there."

Stephanie raised her brow as she placed her hands on her hips and looked at him in disapproval. "And obviously got in a fight judging by those marks on your face."

"Yeah well he deserved it for the marks he put on yours." Paul replied. "He had no right to hit you like that."

"But Paul…."

He quickly shook his head silencing her. "But nothing, Steph. He hit you. I was pissed so I went over there and I did something about it. End of story."

"So I take it he knows about us then?"

"Yeah, I told him last night hence the bruises."

As his brown eyes stared back at her angrily, Stephanie immediately felt bad and sighed realising she was being unfair to Paul by reacting the way she had. He had only defended her, the way any decent guy would in that situation. She had no right to be giving him a hard time. After all, she was the one who had dragged him into this sorry mess in the first place.

Crossing the short distance to the bed, she knelt down beside him, the mattress lightly dipping underneath her weight. "I'm sorry Paul. I guess I'm still feeling guilty about what I've done to Shawn and I'm taking it out on you when I shouldn't be."

Paul pressed his lips together as he reached for her hand, lightly toying with her fingertips as he looked up and met her big blue eyes. "It's okay. I understand. And I feel guilty too, you know. I'm not exactly proud of myself but I want to be with you Steph and unfortunately that means hurting Shawn in the process. I have to accept that and move on."

Stephanie nodded as her fingers slid through his and her thumb began to trace small circles on the back of his hand. "I'm glad it's over though. We've told him and now we can be together." Her expression was almost shy as her lips twitched with her small smile. "Together in every sense of the word."

Paul swallowed thickly as she brought his hand to her mouth and kissed his fingertips. His eyes dropped to the creamy mounds of her breasts that poked temptingly over the top of her nightdress and he felt the desire coil in the pit of his stomach, desire that up until now, he'd had to try hard to resist. He had respected the decision Stephanie had made not to sleep together until they had told Shawn the truth. He supposed it helped them feel slightly less guilty in a way but now there was nothing standing in their way and he, for one, was extremely relieved. He was a man after all and after waiting all this time to be with Stephanie, he didn't think he could have gone on for much longer lying next to her and not touching her or showing her just how much he wanted her. And God, he did want her. Stephanie was like a drug he continually craved over and over again.

Licking his lips, Paul tugged on her arm and pulled her closer to him. "Come over here."

Stephanie smiled and crawled over to straddle his lap. She felt her body tingle as he slid his arms around her waist and pulled her forward, the covers shifting underneath her as their bodies pressed together. She felt the heat of his skin through the silk of her nightdress as Paul brought his right hand up and ran his long fingers through her hair. His hushed whisper in her ear gave her goose bumps. "I love you."

"I love you too. So much." she told him as their noses brushed together.

Paul captured her mouth with his and he kissed her stealing her breath away. Stephanie's hand lifted to tangle in his soft blonde strands as she pressed her palm against his head, squeezing out any distance that remained between them. Her lips slightly parted and she let out a soft moan as Paul's tongue brushed over hers, tasting her and tempting her. Her mind was a delicious haze as he explored her mouth and she could feel his hand slowly drifting down her back leaving a burning trail on her skin as his fingers slipped underneath the hem of her nightdress.

"Paul." she whispered as his mouth moved to her neck, gently sucking on the column of her throat and driving her wild. She needed him so much. She wanted to feel him and show him just how much she did love him because suddenly her words just weren't enough.

"Stephanie? Can I come in?"

Paul's moan vibrated over her skin as Melissa's voice filtered through the closed door. She tried to quash her own disappointment as he lifted his head from her neck but her face flickered with her amusement as he shouted back.

"Go away Mel. You're not invited."

Stephanie laughed and playfully tousled his hair. She quickly moved off his lap to sit on the bed fixing her appearance and shouting at her friend to come in.

Melissa's expression was meek when she appeared through the doorway. "Sorry guys. Was I interrupting something?"

"You were actually." smirked Paul but his smile quickly faded when he felt the light smack on his arm. "Ow!" he exclaimed as he pouted at Stephanie, his big hand rubbing at the spot where her hand had connected.

Stephanie rolled her eyes at his pathetic attempt at sympathy. "Don't listen to him Mel. He's only trying to embarrass me."

"And succeeding, judging by the redness of your face." grinned Melissa. She turned to look at Paul and her brown eyes narrowed in his direction. "And judging by that nasty bruise on yours, I take it you went to see Shawn last night."

Paul lifted his shoulder in a shrug. "I didn't take too kindly to him hitting Steph and he didn't like it when I told him I was in love with his wife."

"I can imagine." sighed Melissa sadly as she glanced over at Stephanie. "Anyway I just wondered if you were going into work today. If you are, we really need to leave in the next fifteen minutes."

Stephanie nodded and stood up from the bed. "I'll be ready in ten."

Melissa nodded and walked out the door closing it behind her.

Paul looked over at Stephanie in confusion. "You're going into work?"

She nodded as she rummaged through her open suitcase quickly picking out a skirt and matching blouse. "I have to. I've got a four o'clock deadline on a manuscript and I'm not even half-way done."

As she looked up, Paul pouted his lips once more. "But what about me?"

Stephanie laughed at his sorry expression as she walked over beside him and planted a soft kiss on his lips. "I'm sure you'll survive a few hours on your own."

He snorted. "That's not what I meant."

Stephanie smiled, her body still tingling from the aftermath of his kisses and she knew she was just as disappointed. "How about I promise to make it up to you later?" she winked as she kissed him again.

"Oh I'm going to hold you to that."

Paul's brown eyes watched her disappear into the adjoining bathroom before he sighed and settled back against the pillows pressing his lips together thoughtfully. "I think I'll do a little house hunting today." he called out to her.

S

tephanie re-appeared in the doorway, her brow crinkled with her curiosity. "Why?"

"I don't know. I guess I want to have a base when I'm travelling back and forward from New York. Plus, well if I'm honest, I'd like you to stay there too." He paused for a second and lifted his shoulder in a shrug as his brown eyes settled on hers. "I mean you don't have a home now that you've left Shawn and at least it would be somewhere for us to stay until we decide what we're going to do in the long term."

Stephanie was touched by his offer and she walked over to wrap her arms around his neck, breathing him in deeply. "I like the sound of that. I really do."

She sighed contentedly as Paul's big arms slid around her.

"Good because I do too." He kissed her hair and his brown eyes sparkled at her as he gently released her. "Besides, it will save Melissa having to listen to you screaming out my name every night."

Stephanie laughed as she shook her head in disbelief. "You're full of yourself aren't you?"

Paul lifted his lips in a cocky smirk. "I'm full of a lot of things, baby which you're more than welcome to find out later tonight. In the meantime, you'd better get that pretty little ass of yours in that bathroom if you're planning to be ready on time."

Stephanie giggled as he playfully swatted at her. As she disappeared once more into the bathroom, Paul leant back on the pillows and closed his eyes, feeling pretty optimistic about the future. Today was the start of a proper beginning for his relationship with Stephanie and he honestly couldn't be happier about it. They had so much to look forward to together including the baby. They really were going to be a family in every sense of the word. They only had one final hurdle left before they could forget about Shawn and truly move on with their lives and the sooner Stephanie found out he was the father of their unborn child, the better as far as he was concerned.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Kevin's eyes slowly fluttered open and it took a moment for the room to come into focus for him. As he took in his unfamiliar surroundings, he began to remember exactly where he was. He was at Shawn's apartment. He was back in New York.

Kevin sighed heavily as his head shifted on the pillow, remembering why he was here in the first place and recalling the events of last night. He had been absolutely stunned and shocked to arrive and find Shawn and Paul fighting on the floor. Somehow it had been the last thing he had expected. Honestly, he hadn't thought Paul would have told Shawn the truth so quickly and personally, he had wanted to be here when it had all gone down in some futile attempt to try and sort things out both calmly and rationally. But then again, he was kidding no-one, including himself, by even thinking things between his two friends could ever be calm or rational. Not now. Not when things had gone so far between them. And the truth was the whole situation had been nothing but a ticking time bomb anyway the second Stephanie had gotten involved with Paul. And last night that bomb had gone off big style.

As Kevin yawned and his hand rubbed at his eye, he thought about the way Paul had picked up for him no questions asked. He had told Shawn that he had known nothing about the whole situation. It had been a blatant lie but Kevin was grateful to Paul for doing it. It sure made looking after Shawn a hell of a lot easier. He would have gone absolutely crazy if he even suspected he knew anything about Stephanie and Paul.

Throwing back the covers, Kevin swung his legs out of bed and decided he had better go and check on Shawn. It was still early. It was just after ten o'clock but if his reaction to losing Stephanie was anything like Paul's had been, there was every chance his friend could be half-smashed by now.

Kevin scratched his stomach as he walked out into the living room and his eyes widened with surprise to see it was empty. That meant Shawn was still in bed which was probably a good thing. Kevin shuffled along the hall and towards Shawn's bedroom. He knocked on the door and poked his head into the room. His brow instantly crinkled with his concern the second he noticed the empty bed and it hadn't even been slept in judging by the neatness of the covers. Kevin sighed and ran his fingers through his hair wondering where the hell his friend was.

"Shawn?" he called out as he wandered through the apartment. He felt his stomach begin to twist into anxious knots when the apartment remained silent and he got no reply at all. And when he walked into the kitchen, the knots got tighter when he witnessed the devastation there. Stephanie's clothes were ripped up and strewn everywhere. There was an empty bottle of whisky sitting on the counter. Kevin shook his head as he walked across to the table. Lying on it was an album and vandalised photos lay all over the surface. Kevin picked one up and recognised it. It was a picture of the wedding party and Paul and Stephanie's faces had been deliberately cut out of the picture.

Kevin threw the photo back down and he was filled with a sense of dread when he realised that Shawn was in a really bad way. He was obviously filled with rage about what had happened. And a drunken rage if the bottle was anything to go by. But the question was, where had he gone? He was in no fit state to be anywhere right now.

Kevin walked back towards the room he was staying in to get his cell phone. His priority was to warn Paul that Shawn was on the loose. His friend might have nothing to worry about but forearmed was definitely forewarned in his book.

He picked up the phone and dialled his number and waited impatiently as it started to ring out. "Come on Paul. Answer your goddamn phone." he muttered as he paced around in front of the window. He was about to give up when he heard his voice at the other end.

"Hello?"

"Paul! Thank God! Listen man, Shawn's gone missing."

"What? I thought you were meant to be keeping an eye on him Kev."

"I know, I know. But I woke up this morning and he was gone. Paul, he's ripped up Stephanie's clothes, vandalised wedding photos and drank God knows how much. I don't know what he'll do."

He heard Paul sigh at the other end.

"Have you called his cell?"

Kevin closed his eyes and mentally cursed himself for not thinking of that.

"No. I'll do that now. Paul, just make sure to keep Stephanie with you at all times will you? After finding out he hit her yesterday, God knows what he's capable of."

He heard the silence at the other end of the phone and he got an uneasy feeling in his stomach as he stood frozen to the spot.

"Paul? Are you there?"

"Kev, Stephanie's at work but I'm going to call her right now. I'll let you know if Shawn turns up."

Paul hung up before Kevin even had a chance to reply. He tried not to panic as he dialled Stephanie's number but he began to feel chills as he listened to it ring out. Realising she wasn't going to answer, he hung up and wondered what the hell he was going to do now because the truth was he didn't have a clue where Stephanie worked let alone know how to reach her. It was so stupid in hindsight but they had been so preoccupied with Shawn the past few days that they hadn't gotten round to the simple details like the name of the company where she worked.

Suddenly Paul got an idea. He anxiously scrolled through his numbers and waited for the person to pick up on the other end.

"Hello?"

Paul let out a relieved breath as he heard her voice. "Hey Jen. It's Paul. How are you?"

"Paul! Well, it's nice to know you're still alive. You'll be glad to hear I don't hold any grudges for abandoning me that night in Boston."

Paul scowled impatiently as he listened to her drone on. "Look Jen, I really don't have time to talk right now." he told her bluntly. "I just wondered if you could give me the name of the publishing company you use."

"It's W. W. Norton & Company. Don't you remember the name from the book launch?" 

"Sorry, I didn't. Listen Jen, thanks. I've got to go now." 

Paul hung up before he could hear her protests at the other end. He grabbed his coat from the sofa and made his way out of the apartment. He might not know where the publishing house was but a taxi cab would take him there… 

There was no answer from Shawn. Now Paul wasn't picking up either. Of course Kevin was completely unaware that Paul had left his phone in Melissa's apartment in his hurry to get to Stephanie. He groaned in frustration as he heard Paul's message service kick in.

"Paul, where are you man? Anyway I can't get hold of Shawn. Will you call me back as soon as you get this message?" 

Kevin threw the phone down on the bed. He felt sick not knowing what was happening. He just hoped that no-one would do anything they would end up regretting. 


	20. Chapter 20

This chapter is a little intense and I did toy with changing it but then I'd have to rewrite the whole story and God knows I have enough writing to do without completely changing old stories too lol. So despite the drama, I hope you enjoy this chapter anyways :)

* * *

Chapter 20

Shawn had managed to enter the building without any significant problems. After all, he was the husband of an employee. Well, at least on paper he was.

Stepping into the elevator, he pressed the button for the tenth floor, the floor that Stephanie worked on. He'd been here many times before in the three years they'd been together but never in a situation like this one. As the doors slid shut, he immediately took the hip flask out of his pocket and quickly took a mouthful. God knows he needed something to block out the pain; a pain that consumed him and ate away at him every time he thought about his lovely wife and his supposed best friend. He well and truly had been played like a fool by both of them, the two people he had loved and trusted most in this world.

Just then the elevator doors pinged open and Shawn hastily stuffed the flask back in his jacket pocket before bowing his head and walking along the corridor towards Stephanie's office. It seemed relatively quiet compared to the last time he had been here and that suited him just fine. He wasn't here to get noticed and he certainly wasn't in the mood for any form of conversation with any of Stephanie's work colleagues.

Shawn kept his head down as he walked along to the end of the corridor where Stephanie's office was. It was pretty isolated and he remembered Stephanie telling him that suited her just fine especially when she needed peace and quiet to work on her manuscripts. As he approached the modern glass walled office, Shawn could see her leaning back in her chair reading a manuscript. He could feel the familiar action of his breath catching in his throat as he stood still just watching her for a second. Despite everything she was still the most beautiful woman in the world to him. No one else came close and the loud beating of his heart told him that he still loved her with everything inside him and it was a love that made him weak. Weak in the sense that he would probably forgive her for her indiscretion because deep down he knew he would do anything just to get her back. It also made him angry to realise he could be hopelessly pathetic and after this he'd probably not have a shred of dignity left. But he had to think of the baby too. This could be his only chance to put his family back together. Hell, it could be his only chance to have a family.

Just then Stephanie swung round in her chair and her back was turned to him. Realising she had presented him with the perfect opportunity Shawn gathered his emotions in check and approached the office quietly opening the door. He quickly locked it once he saw Stephanie's shocked expression at seeing him there.

She jumped up, pushing back her chair. "What the hell are you doing here Shawn?"

Shawn saw the fear that encompassed her wide blue eyes and it made him sick inside to realise she was actually scared of him. His own wife was fucking terrified and he had no-one to blame for that but himself. After all, he had hit her yesterday. An action he had never dreamed he was capable of and something he could never forgive himself for. After all he had no excuses for laying his hands on the woman he loved. He just had his remorse.

Shawn swallowed hard suddenly feeling terribly sober as he held his hands up in a gesture of peace. He cautiously walked towards his wife, trying his best to reassure her. "I'm not here to cause trouble Stephanie. I just want to talk. That's all."

Stephanie shook her head, clutching at her desk as she moved back slightly. "We've got nothing left to say to each other, Shawn. I said what I had to say yesterday."

"Well I didn't so I'd appreciate it if you'd give me the time now to listen to me." he asked her.

Shawn slowly approached the desk and as he got closer, Stephanie noticed the red glazed look in his eyes and there was no mistaking the smell the alcohol on his breath either. Shawn was drunk and right there and then, she decided she wasn't going to argue with him. After all he had hit her yesterday when he was stone cold sober. She didn't know what he was capable of now and she couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt in her chest. She couldn't help but feel responsible for what she had done to him. After all Shawn wasn't a violent man but her actions had made him one. Her deceit had broken him.

Shawn placed his hands on her shoulders and Stephanie visibly flinched at the contact as his bloodshot eyes sought out hers.

"Look I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for hitting you yesterday. I'm sorry for not being enough. But I still love you. Stay with me Steph." he pleaded. "Come home."

They weren't the words she expected to hear. Her mouth parted in stunned surprise as she looked at him incredulously. "Shawn, I can't and you know I can't. I thought I explained everything to you yesterday."

Shawn stepped back and slowly nodded his head, his arms falling and his fists clenching tightly at his sides. "You did although you missed out the tiny detail of Paul being your bed buddy."

He shook his head and raked his fingers through his hair in an exaggerated movement.

"I just can't believe you did that to me. And my fucking best friend of all people!"

"I didn't know who he was at first. I promise."

Her admission fell on deaf ears as Shawn snorted in disgust.

"Paul tried to tell me the same thing last night. Like it was supposed to make it all better. Well it doesn't Stephanie. Not by a long shot."

The blood was beating in Stephanie's ears as she watched her husband take out a flask from his pocket. As he took a gulp of the drink, she let out a shaky breath feeling her knees lightly tremble underneath her. She hated this. She hated the conflict and she hated Shawn confronting her like this, in this state. Maybe it was the pregnancy but she felt the overwhelming need to protect herself, to protect herself from Shawn.

"Don't you think you've had enough?" she asked him gently.

Her kind tone didn't placate him in the least and Shawn's expression was angry and cold as he screwed the top back on the flask. "I'll decide when I've had enough. Anyway, it's not like you care anymore."

Stephanie quickly shook her head stopping him. "I do care Shawn. I know it doesn't seem like it now but I do."

"Then why won't you come home Stephanie? Please!" he asked her as he watched her hopefully. "I'll even overlook this whole stupid affair with Paul. Hell, the guy's a charmer. He probably talked you into the whole thing anyway."

She shook her head once more correcting him as she hugged her arms around her chest defensively. "It wasn't like that."

"Then what was it like Stephanie? I mean don't even try and tell me you're in love with him?"

Shawn snorted and started to laugh manically as he saw her gaze drop to the floor but his laughter couldn't mask the pain he felt at the thought of her loving someone else. Someone that simply wasn't him. It was just a pity his darling wife was naïve enough to believe her love was returned. See, he knew Paul. He knew his history. There was no chance in hell that he saw Stephanie for anything more than she was; another notch on his bedpost; a quick screw. Hell, the whole thrill of the chase was probably the fact Stephanie was married to someone else. Paul always did love a challenge but it was a certainty he would dump her the second the novelty of the whole thing wore off. He should know. He'd witnessed it plenty of times in the past and like the old saying went, a leopard doesn't change its spots especially a two faced, lying scumbag leopard like Paul Levesque.

"You do know you're going to get hurt, don't you?" Shawn warned as he raked his hand impatiently through his limp blonde strands. "Paul's a player, Steph. He always has been. Hell, you're not the first woman of mine he's gone after. Just ask him if you don't think I'm telling you the truth."

Stephanie looked up and shook her head, certain of Paul and certain of his feelings for her. "He's not like that. He loves me."

Shawn scoffed at her response. "Did he tell you that?"

She slowly nodded.

"Well he's lying." he shot back. "The only thing Paul Levesque has ever loved is his career. He always has. Why do you think he's never had a serious relationship before? He can't commit to anyone."

Stephanie shook her head once more refusing to listen to him. Paul loved her. He had told her as much and she believed him. Shawn was lying. He had to be.

"I'm telling you Stephanie, he's no good for you. But I am."

Shawn paused as his expression shifted, his familiar eyes becoming softer.

"I love you Stephanie. I've always put you first haven't I?"

She reluctantly nodded her head giving him at least that much. Shawn had always been completely unselfish in their marriage and that was one thing she couldn't fault him on. She'd never been neglected. She'd never been made to feel anything less than a priority. Until yesterday when he had struck her although Stephanie knew that was partly her fault.

"Paul will never do that. You'll never be first to him. You'll always be second best to his job, his fucking wonderful career." Shawn snarled before his face became more gentle as he walked towards her again, his hand reaching for her. "Come home with me Stephanie. We can re-build our family. We can start from scratch; you and me and our baby."

Despite his smile, Stephanie slowly began to back away from him, the blood pulsing in her ears knowing that despite her fear of angering him, she had to be brutal to make him see sense.

"No Shawn. We can't. I'm sorry but we can't." she explained as she shook her head sadly and her big blue eyes glossed over with her tears. "We can't be together because the truth is I never should have married you. We shouldn't be together. It was a mistake, Shawn."

"Don't…don't say that Stephanie." Shawn told her through clenched teeth as he pointed his finger in her direction. "Don't label this as a mistake. We're not a mistake."

Stephanie offered him a sad smile. "Maybe that was true once upon a time but now…." She paused to wipe at her cheeks that were stained with the silent tears that trickled down like drops of water. "Now it's over, Shawn. It has to be."

"Why?"

"Because I love him Shawn." she told him simply. "I love Paul and we're together now. And I want to be with him."

Shawn pressed his lips together fighting back the tears that threatened to fall, tears that had the power to cripple him if he let them go. Just like if he let Stephanie go. The thought of being without her killed him inside and he refused to give up on this. He refused to give up on her.

"But what about our child? Our baby, Steph?" he said. "The baby we created together. Surely they deserve to grow up in a proper family? Surely I deserve that chance to be that family?"

"But what if we're not?"

"Not what?" asked Shawn, his face crumpling with his confusion.

"What if we're not a family? What if the baby's not yours?"

Stephanie bit down on her lip as she looked at Shawn warily, not sure how he would react to that question. She hadn't meant to blurt it out like that and hurt him any more than she had to because the truth was a big part of her believed the baby was Shawn's. The dates added up and it made sense but she needed to do something, find some way to make him give up on pursuing their relationship. He just didn't seem to be getting the message otherwise and sometimes you needed to be cruel to be kind. And of course there was the tiny possibility, however small it was, that Paul was indeed the father. He truly believed in his heart that he was. She wanted to trust in his belief and his certainty and God knows it would make her life a hell of a lot simpler if he was.

"What did you just say to me?" Shawn asked her angrily as his face visibly crumpled with his rage. He menacingly started to walk in her direction and Stephanie swallowed hard, instinctively backing away from him.

"I just think we should consider the possibility that the baby might not be yours. After all, I was sleeping with Paul too." she told him trying her best to be logical.

But all logic and reason went out the window as Shawn literally blew up in front of her. His face went red and she could see he was seething with anger.

"You bitch!" he spat back at her as he loomed over her.

He had this almost insane look in his eyes. It was a look Stephanie had seen before and felt her entire body start to tremble in fear. Her eyes darted towards the door desperate to escape. She had only taken a couple of steps when she felt him pull her by the hair, yanking the strands at the roots making her wince in pain.

"Don't even try to deny me my child." he snarled into her ear as he brought her to him. "Because that baby is mine, you hear me! Mine! Not Paul's. I bet he's been the one filling your head with this crap!"

Stephanie briefly closed her eyes as she bit back her tears. "Please Shawn, let go of me. You're hurting me." she pleaded.

"Not until you tell me that baby is mine."

Gritting her teeth, Stephanie felt her own anger start to bubble to the surface. How dare he! How fucking dare he! She snarled back at him as she opened her eyes and she turned her head to look at him defiantly, refusing to feel intimidated by him, hating the man who was standing in front of her right now; a drunken bully who wouldn't get the satisfaction of witnessing her fear.

"Over my dead body!" she sneered back suddenly filled with the desire for Shawn to feel every bit of pain she was feeling right now. He was going to suffer the way she had suffered yesterday when he had struck her.

"I hope the baby is Paul's." Stephanie hissed. "Because I'll tell you something he's twice the man you are and he's twice the man you'll ever be."

She let out a whimper as Shawn jerked her head back and stared at her with a manic look in his eyes. She was scared to death but Stephanie refused to show him any weakness as she defiantly blinked back her tears.

"Take that back. Take it back right fucking now." he hissed.

"And why would I, Shawn? I'm only telling you the truth. I mean look at you. You're nothing but a coward and a bully. You're not fit to be a father."

Stephanie felt a wave of relief wash over her as Shawn shoved her away releasing her from his grip but that relief was only temporary. Her skin burned like fire as his hand struck her across her face. Her head dipped momentarily as she clutched her cheek. Stephanie's tears blurred her vision as she pushed past Shawn to flee the room but he shoved her aside using his full force. Stephanie's body collided with the sturdy oak furniture in her path. Her stomach was in direct contact with the left hand corner as she hit the desk and Shawn could only watch in horror as the collision sent her sprawling to the ground.

He could only stand in a stunned silence for a few moments until her faint groan lifted him from his haze. The vomit rose in Shawn's throat as he saw the body in front of him, witnessing first hand what he had done to Stephanie. He pressed his hand to his mouth as he struggled to process what had happened. He had never meant to hurt her. He had never meant to hurt his wife but a red mist had descended on him the second she had goaded him about the baby. Then there was that shit about being half the man Paul was and what had hurt even more was that it was fucking true. He was only half the man. His fucking infertility had seen to that. The fucking cancer had made sure he could never be a father and right now he was glad. He didn't deserve to be one and he wasn't fit to be one either. Fuck! What had he done!

Shawn pushed back his hair frantically as he stared at the still body on the floor. His entire body was shaking as he tentatively walked across and knelt down in front of Stephanie on the floor. His hands hovered over her body scared to touch her, unsure what to do.

"Steph, are you okay?" he asked shakily.

Her reply was another soft groan and he was about to roll her over when he heard someone try to open the locked door from the other side.

"Stephanie, are you in there? Is everything okay?"

He panicked as he heard Melissa's voice, his heart racing hard in his chest. He crouched there in a brief silence until he heard her footsteps disappear down the corridor. Shawn quickly stood up running his fingers through his hair trying to decide what the hell to do now. He'd really fucked up this time and boy, did he know it. Still, that didn't mean he had the guts to face the consequences of his actions. He couldn't bear to see the looks on people's faces when they saw what he had done. He would sicken and disgust them. God knows he disgusted himself.

Right then Shawn did the only thing he thought he could do. He ran to the door and unlocking it, he left. He tried to ignore the guilt he felt leaving Stephanie lying there but he had no choice. He had to get out of here and fast. Making his way quickly down the corridor, he alerted a young girl who was sitting at her desk not far from Stephanie's office.

"Can you check on Stephanie for me please? I think something is wrong."

The girl immediately gasped and stood up. Her mouth had parted and she was about to ask him what had happened when she watched him run off down the corridor. She quickly shook herself out of her funk and her stomach was churning as she ran down to check on Stephanie. Alicia gasped as she burst into the room and scurrying behind the desk, she found her lying sprawled on the floor.

"Stephanie, are you okay?" she asked as she bent over her.

Stephanie slowly turned her head and Alicia saw the tears in her eyes.

"Can you get some help? It really hurts."

Alicia nodded and quickly rising back to her feet, she ran out of the office. She nearly collided with Melissa who had come back to check on Stephanie.

"Alicia, what's going on?"

"It's Stephanie. She's hurt. I'm going to call an ambulance."

Melissa felt herself start to panic and she ran into the office. She immediately ran over to friend's side. "Stephanie, what happened?"

"I hit the desk. I fell over." she mumbled.

Melissa brushed back her chestnut hair and saw her friend's face was extremely pale. She saw the tears glistening in her frightened blue eyes and she tried her best to soothe her.

"It's going to be okay Steph. Alicia's calling an ambulance now."

Just then she heard a voice in the corridor enquiring about Stephanie. She recognised it and immediately shouted at him from the room.

"Paul. She's through here."

Stephanie's throat burned at the sound of his name and she blinked back her tears as she saw him appear in front of her. Her hands reached for him as Melissa moved aside to let him through.

"Stephanie, are you okay? What the hell happened?" he asked her as he bent over her, his hand brushing away the tears that had fallen down her face. She could see the concern etched in his brown eyes as they frantically searched hers.

"Shawn was here." she said shakily.

She watched Paul immediately bristle with rage, his face crumpled in fury and knowing exactly what he was thinking, she placed her hand on his arm stopping him.

"Please Paul. Stay with me. I need you. I'm so scared." she told him pressing her lips together as a fresh wave of tears spilled over her lashes, washing down her face.

Paul's face softened as he heard her plea. "Are you hurt?"

Stephanie closed her eyes and Paul watched the tears that spilled over her lashes once more onto her cheeks. His heart broke for her as he wiped them away with his thumb and tried his hardest to ignore the anxious knots that twisted in his gut. He was worried sick but he couldn't let her see that. He had to be strong. The last thing she needed was him losing it on her. Letting out a calming breath, he spoke softly and calmly or as calm as he could be given the circumstances.

"Where?" he asked.

When Stephanie eventually opened her eyes there was no mistaking the pain or the fear in her ocean blue pools. "My stomach. What if it's the baby, Paul?" she whispered.

Inside Paul felt a sickening panic grip his chest but on the outside, he painted on a smile determined to be positive for the woman he loved more than anything.

"We don't know that. Just try not to worry. Okay?"

Stephanie nodded her head and Paul stroked the side of her face, his thumb lightly tracing her cheek.

"Good. Now do you think you can sit up?"

"I think so."

Paul slid his arms around her body and gently pulled her up into a sitting position. He immediately turned himself so he was sitting directly beside her and he wrapped his arm around her shoulder pulling her close towards him. As she rested his head on his shoulder, he dropped a kiss in her hair and tried not to focus on the dark circle of blood that stained the front of her skirt. He didn't want to even think about what it meant.

A few seconds later Melissa popped her head around the door. "The paramedics are here."

Paul let out the breath he had been holding and as the paramedics walked over towards Stephanie, he stood up and let them take care of her. He looked round in a daze as he felt Melissa squeeze his shoulder.

"The baby will be okay Paul, won't it?"

As Paul watched the paramedics bring Stephanie to her feet, he felt the pain in his chest as he slowly shook his head. His voice was barely audible when he spoke.

"I don't think so. It really doesn't look good."

The paramedics started to wheel Stephanie towards the door. Paul turned to Melissa and squeezed her shoulder gently.

"I'll give you a call when we know what the story is."

Melissa nodded and blinked back her tears as she watched Paul follow Stephanie out of the office…

* * *

Paul sat in the small uncomfortable chair by the side of the bed. His big hand held Stephanie's as she slept and tenderly brushing back her hair from her forehead, he sighed heavily as he watched her. Even her beautiful face was troubled in her sleep. Paul had hoped she would find some peace once she had finally closed her eyes. God knows she deserved it after everything she had been through today.

Paul sniffed and wiped away tears he hadn't even realised he had shed as he thought about the baby they had lost. A little person they would never get the chance to meet. They had both been devastated when the doctor had told them the news and they had held each other tightly while they cried and mourned for their loss. It was amazing how quickly your fortunes changed. Only this morning, they had been looking forward to a whole new future together. Now God only knows what that future would hold. But one thing was for sure. Paul was going to be by Stephanie's side no matter what because she needed him. No-one or nothing was going to come between them. He was as sure of that as he was sure of anything right now. Just like he was sure Shawn would pay for what he had done to them. He would make sure that bastard never regretted anything more in his life.


	21. Chapter 21

Thanks for all your fab reviews. You're definitely all way too good to me :) So as a thank you, here's the next installment!

* * *

Chapter 21

Stephanie's rhythmic breathing echoed in the silent hospital room. Soft darts of sunlight danced across her face as she slept, illuminating her natural beauty. Paul's facial expression was gentle as he watched her, his big hand smoothing back her hair from her cool forehead. She looked so frail lying against the padded white pillows. Her skin was so pale and dark circles encompassed her eyes. The past couple of days had completely taken its toll on Stephanie and he was just glad she had found some kind of respite, if only for a little while.

Honestly, he actually envied the fact Stephanie had been so exhausted she had succumbed to sleep. It would be a relief to be able to forget the hurt and the pain. And then there was the anger. The anger that was eating him up on the inside, so much so there were times when he felt he was about to explode. But he didn't explode; at least not yet. Not while Stephanie still needed him. She was his only priority and he had to focus on that. He daren't think about Shawn and what he had done because if he even allowed himself one second to dwell on it, his calm façade would crack. And he couldn't let that happen. Not here. Not right now.

Just then Stephanie moaned softly and her head shifted on the pillow. Paul's hand stilled in her hair as he watched her eyelids slowly flutter open and as her blue orbs settled on him, his mouth curved up tenderly.

"Hey you."

"Hey." she breathed as she licked her dry lips. The bed lightly creaked underneath her as she shifted her weight, pushing her body up the pillows. Her blue eyes were concerned as she reached for Paul, her fingers curling around his cheek.

"You look tired Paul. You should try and rest."

He quickly shook his head, his blonde strands shifting across his shoulders as he leant into her touch. "I'm fine. Besides, I don't want to leave you. I want to be here."

"But Paul …"

Paul placed his finger on her lips effectively silencing her. "No arguments Steph. I'm staying here and that's final."

She slowly nodded her head, hearing the strong determination in his voice and that determination was reflected in the expression on his face. Paul wasn't going anywhere and even although she had been trying to persuade him otherwise, she was actually relieved he was staying. The truth was she didn't want him to leave. She needed him far too much. He was her shoulder and her strength.

"So, how are you feeling?" asked Paul as he brought her hand from his face, kissing her palm before intertwining her fingers with his.

As his eyes searched out hers, Stephanie saw the concern that flickered in the deep brown pools and while she hated the fact she was causing him to worry about her, she couldn't disguise her pain or her grief. She couldn't pretend everything was okay when it was anything but. Besides, she had to be honest with him. He deserved that much. And maybe, just maybe, admitting how she felt would eventually help her begin the healing process.

Sighing softly, Stephanie pushed her hair back behind her ear before she lifted her shoulder in a shrug. "I don't know. Sad. Upset. Angry. You name it, I'm feeling it."

She paused as she licked her lips glancing down at the crisp cotton bed sheets.

"But more than any of that I feel guilty." she admitted softly and she briefly closed her eyes as she felt them gloss over with her tears. She blinked them back as she tilted her head to the side and looked at Paul. "I feel like this is whole thing is all my fault. I'm so sorry."

Her voice broke and a shaky breath hitched in her throat as her tears spilled over her lashes. Paul immediately reached for her as he stood up from the chair, wrapping his arms around her and holding her tightly. Stephanie buried her face in his neck, her arm gripping around his waist as he sat next to her on the bed.

"Sshhhh." he hushed, trying his best to soothe her as he rocked her. His lips brushed over her temple as his fingers threaded through her hair.

"Don't you even think of blaming yourself, Steph. I won't let you."

She immediately lifted her head and her big sad blue eyes sought out his.

"But it is my fault, Paul." she sniffed. "This whole mess is my fault."

She hiccupped with her tears as the pad of his thumb tenderly wiped at her wet cheeks.

"We both know that if it wasn't for me being such a damn coward and being too scared to call off the wedding to Shawn, none of this would have happened. None of it! But now I've hurt you, I've hurt Shawn and now I've lost the baby. An innocent life is gone because I was far too gutless to make the right decision."

Stephanie felt her stomach ache as the tears slipped down her face and she immediately looked away but Paul's fingers tucked under her chin, lifting it up and deliberately forcing her eyes to reluctantly meet his.

"I'm not letting you do this, Stephanie." he told her sternly. "I'm not letting you blame yourself. You've done nothing wrong, do you hear me? Nothing! It's not your fault the baby died."

Paul immediately hugged her to him and closed his eyes. He could feel his stomach twisting in knots as he tried not to think about the person who was responsible for the loss of their child. He just couldn't let himself go there. Instead he had to focus on Stephanie. She needed him and she was the one thing that mattered to him right now.

Burying his face in her hair, he pulled her closer but jumped slightly startled when he heard the door open. His lips curled into a scowl at the interruption however his face immediately softened when he saw Melissa's head pop through. He smiled at her gesturing for her to come in.

Her footsteps were slow as she approached the bed placing down the bag she was carrying with her. "I'm so sorry Paul." she hushed, lightly touching his arm.

He briefly nodded, pressing his lips together in a composed, tight smile. He felt Stephanie move away from him, lifting her head at the sound of her best friend's voice. His big hand rubbed her arm reassuringly as Melissa approached her.

Her slender hand sought out Stephanie's.

"I know it's probably a really stupid question right now but how are you?"

Stephanie's lips trembled with her smile. "I'm coping, I guess."

She cleared her throat as her hand wiped at her cheek. She felt the mattress move underneath her as Paul stood up from the bed.

"Listen, I'll let you two catch up." he smiled, raking his long fingers through his limp blonde strands. His expression was tender as he squeezed Stephanie's hand.

"I'll go and get some coffee or something. Anybody want one?"

Stephanie shook her head while Melissa screwed up her face.

"You have tasted the coffee in here, haven't you?"

Paul chuckled as he adjusted the bottom hem of his t-shirt. "No, I haven't. I guess I'll be sticking to the water then."

Melissa grinned as Paul disappeared through the doorway. As she sat down in the chair next to Stephanie, she saw her friend's eyes still watching him as he passed by the small window.

"Paul has been so amazing since we got here."

Her gaze lingered a second longer before she slowly turned her head, her lips upturned in the faintest of smiles.

"You know I think this is the first time he's left my side."

Melissa smiled back as she leant forward clasping Stephanie's hand in hers. "I'm just glad you've got him to help you get through this, Steph. And you will, you know. Get through it."

Stephanie slowly nodded. "I know. I just…"

She paused hearing Paul's words echo in her mind knowing they were probably true but at this moment they were doing very little to absolve her own conscience.

"I just can't help feeling so guilty about everything." she finished.

As soon as the words had left her mouth, she saw Melissa's mouth part to interrupt and she held her hand up effectively stopping her.

"Don't. I know what you're going to say. You're going to tell me it's not my fault but I can't help it Mel. I may not be responsible for losing the baby but I sure as hell am responsible for hurting Shawn enough to make him act the way he did. Because that's not him, Mel. I've changed him. I've broken him."

Tears sprung to her eyes once more as images came flooding at her, images that forced her to remember everything. Everything she desperately wanted to forget.

"Oh Mel, what have I done?" she whispered.

Melissa said nothing as she stood up and pulling Stephanie to her, she let her cry. While it was killing her to see her friend upset, she knew it was the best thing for her. She needed to let it all out instead of bottling it all up inside. Stephanie was strong; a fighter. She would get through this somehow especially with someone like Paul by her side. He loved her and that was all she needed. And hopefully through time she'd realise that no-one else but Shawn was responsible for what had happened to her and her baby. He was the only one to blame and God help him once Paul got his hands on him.

* * *

Paul placed his money in the machine and as his thick fingers awkwardly stabbed at the small buttons, he jumped when he felt a hand slap his shoulder. Spinning on his heel, he saw Kevin smiling at him and he shook his head.

"Jesus Christ, Kev! Are you trying to scare the crap out of me?"

"Sorry man." he smiled.

But his smile faded as he shifted his feet awkwardly and looked at Paul. He could see the sad expression on his friend's face and the dark circles that encompassed his tired eyes.

"Listen, I heard about the baby. Honestly, I don't know what to say."

"There's nothing to say. Not really."

Paul sighed as he lifted the bottle of water from the machine. He focused on the drink in his hand as he lifted his shoulder in a shrug.

"I guess it still feels like none of this is real. It's like I'm walking around in this haze and I keep thinking I'm going to wake up and realise this whole thing is nothing but a bad dream."

He paused for a beat as he felt his chest ache. It was an ache that reminded him this was anything but a dream. In fact, it was all a big horrible, fucked up nightmare.

"But it's not is it?"

He slowly lifted his head and Kevin saw the hurt and pain deeply etched in his face. Unsure what to say to him, he shook his head and awkwardly raked his fingers through his hair.

"How's Stephanie doing?" he asked.

"Not good. She's determined to blame herself for what's happened."

"But that's crazy. These things are no-one's fault, you know."

Kevin felt his words lodge in his throat as he saw the anger that flashed across Paul's eyes before he began to fidget with the bottle of water in his hand.

"I'm going to head back to Stephanie's room. Are you coming?"

Kevin looked at his friend strangely, knowing him and sensing something was obviously wrong.

"Paul, what's going on?" he asked.

Paul quickly shook his head. "Not now Kev. Later."

He spun around and started to walk along the corridor unaware that Kevin was following on behind him looking troubled and worried. But Kevin was the last thing on his mind as he approached Stephanie's room and the dark haunted expression he wore suddenly lifted as he forced a bright smile on his face. The smile was directed at Stephanie as he walked into the room and he was happy to see she had stopped crying. Her tears earlier had all but broken his heart, killing him on the inside.

"I've found a stray outside." he winked at her. "I felt sorry for him and told him he could come in."

Stephanie glanced curiously at the door and as she watched Kevin walk through, she felt the uneasiness begin to slip under her skin. She smiled at him awkwardly not sure what else to do as her fingers nervously clutched at her sheets. It wasn't that she wasn't pleased to see him. She was and she was glad he was here for Paul's sake more than anything else. He needed the support. God knows she was too much of a mess to be there for him. But she was still feeling somewhat uncomfortable about the whole Shawn situation and last time she and Kevin had talked, he had been less than happy with her. She couldn't blame him though. She had more than deserved his anger and then some.

But as Kevin approached the bed, it was as if he sensed her nervousness and an easy smile crossed his face as he lifted his hand in a wave. "Hey Steph. I hope you don't mind but I thought you could use the company. Paul tends gets a bit boring after a while."

Stephanie's lips curved up into a genuine smile. "I don't know about that. Paul could never be boring to me.

"Give it time. Then you'll know what I'm talking about."

He bent down to kiss Stephanie's cheek and as he looked up, he noticed the pretty blonde sitting on the opposite side of the bed. He nodded in her direction unaware that Paul was watching him.

His friend smiled as he saw Kevin's gaze linger on Melissa and he slapped his shoulder affectionately. "Let me introduce you, big man. Kev, the pretty girl over there is Melissa. Melissa, this is Kev, my not so pretty best friend."

Melissa laughed as she nodded at Kevin. "It's nice to put a face to the voice."

Paul's brow crinkled curiously as he glanced between them. "And when did you two talk to one another?"

"About an hour or so ago." shrugged Kevin. "You'd left your phone at the apartment and when I called it, Melissa answered and told me what had happened."

At this point Kevin looked over at Stephanie and his expression softened as he smiled at her apologetically.

"I'm so sorry about the baby Steph."

"I know." she smiled and letting out a calming breath, she reached across to find Paul's hand. She clasped it tightly as he sat beside her on the bed and looking at Kevin, she decided to bite the bullet and ask a question that had been hovering at the back of her mind since he had walked in the room.

"Kevin, do you know if Shawn is at home? I need to talk to him."

Her words still hung in the air as Paul instantly let go of her hand and stood up from the bed again. His brown eyes flashed dark with his anger as he glared at her, making her suddenly feel a little cold and frightened.

"Why the hell would you want to talk to him?"

Stephanie could hear the fury in his voice and honestly, she knew she couldn't blame him for it. Paul was hurt and upset but at the same time, he surely had to understand that despite everything, Shawn deserved to know the truth. After all, the baby could have been his flesh and blood; a part of him.

Licking her dry lips, Stephanie's blue eyes stared up at him. "He needs to know Paul." she told him softly. "After all, the baby could have been his. I think I should tell him what's happened."

Paul's loud snort echoed around the silent hospital room. "I think he knows what he's done Steph. After all, it was him that fucking put you here in the first place."

His words made Kevin's face crumple in shock and he quickly grasped Paul's arm, whipping him round to face him.

"What do you mean? What did Shawn do?"

Paul's brown eyes were hard and cold as they glared back at him. "Shawn killed our child."

"He didn't mean to, Paul. It was an accident."

Paul spun round and stared at Stephanie with disbelief in his eyes.

"What! Why are you defending him, Steph? He hit you then threw you against a desk for fuck sake! He knew what he was doing."

He tried to ignore the tears that spilled down her cheeks as she shook her head.

"No, Paul. Shawn wouldn't have done it deliberately."

"Oh yes he fucking would."

"Why? Why would he put his own baby's life in jeopardy?"

"Because the baby wasn't his, okay? That's why I know that what he did to you was no fucking accident."

Stephanie's face crumbled in front of him and suddenly all his pain and his anger bubbled to the surface. Looking around the room, he began to feel stifled as he slowly backed away, feeling the overwhelming need to just get out. He had to. He was about to explode and the last thing he wanted to do was take it all out on Stephanie. God knows, she'd been through enough already.

Without saying a word, he opened the door and walked out into the corridor. He could sense Kevin following behind him and he quickly turned round holding up his hand to stop him.

"Just leave me alone, Kev. I fucking mean it."

Kevin shook his head. "I can't. Not when you're upset like this."

"Please." Paul paused as he swallowed hard, pushing back the hot lump in his throat. He looked at his friend, his brown eyes pleading for him to understand.

"I just need to be on my own for a bit. I promise I'll come back."

Kevin hesitated seeing the pain in his face not wanting to leave his friend alone but at the same time knowing from personal experience that sometimes you just needed that space to deal with it all. He eventually touched Paul's shoulder and nodded.

"Just promise me you won't do anything stupid."

"I promise. I just need to try and clear my head Kev."

Kevin squeezed his arm and Paul felt his eyes gloss over. He quickly turned away and his vision was blurred as he made his way to the elevator. It wasn't until he got outside and found some privacy in the hospital gardens that he finally allowed the tears to fall. They rolled freely down his cheeks as he thought about the child he had lost; the tiny life he'd wanted more than anything. It had been a part of him; a part of Stephanie and ever since he had met her, he'd allowed himself to hope for the family he had always wanted. A family he had only ever wanted with her. And for a brief moment he had had it. But now it had been cruelly taken away from him by a man he once considered his best friend. God, everything was such a mess and he really was struggling to find a way to cope with it all. But two things were certain. One, he and Stephanie would find a way through this together. And two, Shawn was going to pay and he was going to pay badly for what he had done.

* * *

Stephanie's sobs echoed in the small hospital room. Kevin shifted awkwardly on the seat, raking his fingers through his hair as he watched Melissa try her best to console her friend. Stephanie had been shocked at Paul's outburst but he wasn't. It had only been inevitable that his friend would lose it the second she had mentioned Shawn. Paul was so hurt and angry and rightfully so. It just made him sick to know things had gone this far and the truth was he couldn't help but feel just the tiniest bit guilty every time he thought about it. After all, he had to accept blame for at least part of this whole mess. He had known about pretty much everything yet he had kept it to himself. Maybe if had found the guts to tell Shawn about Paul and Stephanie in the first place, none of this would be happening right now. Or maybe he should have told Paul about the baby when he had first found out. Perhaps things might have turned out differently. Perhaps he wouldn't be sitting here now listening to Stephanie's heart break. But like Paul's anger, her tears had been inevitable. The whole situation had been a disaster from start to finish and had been made even worse by the secrecy and the lies. And besides, all the maybes in the world weren't going to change what had happened today.

Sighing heavily, Kevin lifted his head. His facial expression softened as he watched Stephanie wipe at her face, her shoulders shuddering with her shaky breaths. Her red-rimmed eyes stared back at him as she bit down on the inside of her lip taking a second to compose herself.

"Paul will be okay, won't he?" she asked him eventually.

Kevin nodded and quickly gave her a small smile in some attempt to try and reassure her. "He just needed some time to get his head together. He's had a lot to deal with. You both have."

Stephanie's lips twitched in agreement as her head flopped back against the pillows.

"I just wish he'd understand about Shawn though. I mean, no-one is angrier than I am about what he's done to us. But the baby…."

She paused as she pressed her lips together and glanced down at her hands as her fingers twisted at the material of the white sheet.

"The baby could have been his." she said softly. "Shawn wouldn't deliberately harm his own child."

Her words made the knot in his stomach twist even more tightly and right then and there Kevin made the decision to end the lies. He was so sick and tired of them. Not only that, they had brought nothing but pain and heartache. He needed to put things right for his own sake as much as his friends. Call it his act of contrition for his involvement in the whole damn mess.

"Stephanie, Shawn wasn't the father." he told her.

She lifted her head and her confused blue eyes stared back at him.

"Paul was." he admitted.

"But how? How can you and Paul be so sure?"

Kevin glanced briefly at the floor before looking back at her, sure he was doing the right thing by telling her the truth. "Stephanie, Shawn is infertile."

Her mouth parted in stunned amazement as her head lightly shook in disbelief. "He….he can't be. Surely he would have told me something like that?

"I guess he was scared of losing you. I know he had planned to tell you after the wedding but for some reason, it just didn't happen."

Stephanie's mind was in a spin as she tried to absorb everything Kevin was telling her.

"See, Shawn had cancer when he was younger. The chemotherapy made him infertile. Paul and I have known for years. We didn't have a clue that you didn't know."

Her eyes narrowed in his direction. "Paul knew?"

Kevin slowly nodded his head.

"So why didn't he tell me about Shawn when he found out I was pregnant?"

He sighed lifting his shoulder in a shrug. "He felt he owed it to Shawn to let him tell you the truth. I guess he thought it would ease his guilt a little."

"I just can't believe it." sighed Stephanie. "God, everything is such a mess and it's all my fault…"

Her words fell away as Melissa looked sternly at her friend. "Stop blaming yourself for everything, Steph. It's not going to change anything."

"Melissa is right and I'll bet Paul has told you the same thing."

Stephanie looked at Kevin and slowly nodded.

"Well then maybe you should start listening to us instead of beating yourself up about something that just isn't your fault."

Kevin was about to say something else when he noticed the door open and relief washed through him when he watched Paul walk through. He couldn't help but notice the rawness of his eyes and although he hated seeing him like this, he was also glad his friend had managed to let some of his emotion out. It didn't do any good bottling these things up. He should know. He'd been there, done that and even bought the t-shirt. Paul couldn't afford to become the messed up wreck he had been when his wife had left him. He needed to be strong for Stephanie. She was going to rely on him and look to his strength to get through this. And they would get through this. It was just going to take time to heal.

As he noticed Paul hover awkwardly by the doorway, he smirked at him as he stood up from his chair. "I see the wanderer returns. I was just about to come and look for your sorry ass."

In spite of himself, Paul's lips curved into a smile. He could always rely on Kevin to lighten the mood no matter how crap he felt or how nervous he felt about coming back here. "Yeah, well I saved you the journey big man. Although, judging by that gut you've developed, you could have probably used the exercise."

"Hardy har har Levesque."

Out of the corner of his eye, Kevin saw Stephanie watching Paul anxiously. They had yet to make eye contact and he decided it was time to make himself scarce and let them sort things out privately. He looked over at Melissa and smiled. "Melissa, do you fancy joining me for a coffee?"

Melissa nodded and smiled at him gratefully. "Sure. Let me grab my bag."

"Gee, some date you are. A lousy fifty cent hospital coffee?"

Kevin playfully punched Paul's arm as he passed by him. "Shut up Levesque. Besides, it's at least seventy cents. Speaking of which, have you got any change?"

Paul laughed and pushed him towards the door. "Get out of here."

He watched the door close over behind them before letting out a slow breath. He stuffed his hands in his jeans pockets and turned towards Stephanie. His brown eyes looked around the room awkwardly as he stood there not really sure what to say. He felt guilty about their argument but he wasn't prepared just to sit and listen to a bunch of crap about Shawn either. Christ, every time he thought about the guy he felt sick to his stomach.

"I'm sorry Paul."

He finally looked at Stephanie, surprised and touched by her apology. Her face wore a concerned expression as she tucked her brown strands behind her ear. Her eyes were red and puffy and he immediately felt bad knowing he had upset her enough that she had been crying over it. God knows she had shed enough tears without shedding any more over him. Shuffling his feet underneath him, he offered her a contrite smile.

"I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have shouted at you like that."

Stephanie immediately shook her head. "No. Don't. You've nothing to apologise for Paul. You had every right to be angry at what I said especially knowing Shawn isn't the father."

Paul stared back at her, stunned as he realised that Kevin must have told her about Shawn's infertility. He wondered why being they had agreed to leave that to Shawn. But then again, why should they owe him any loyalty now, especially after what he had done.

"Kevin told me about Shawn's infertility. I can't believe he kept it a secret."

Paul shrugged his shoulders awkwardly, pressing his lips together for a moment, trying his best to suppress the rage he felt every time he thought about his former friend. "He was scared of losing you Steph. I can understand it even although I don't agree with it."

"I guess so." she sighed softly. "But I'm just glad I know the truth now and I can make a clean break from him and our marriage."

"Good."

Removing his hands from his jeans, Paul took the chair next to the bed. Stephanie immediately reached for him, covering his hand with hers. As their fingers slid together, he gazed at them absently, his face softening as his thumb traced her soft skin.

"You know while I was outside, I did a lot of thinking about us."

He glanced up and immediately saw the trepidation in Stephanie's beautiful face. He quickly smiled to reassure her as he gently squeezed her fingers.

"When you get out of here, I want you to think about coming home with me. I mean it will give you a chance to get away from here and everything that's happened even for a little while."

Stephanie's lips trembled with her relief knowing Paul still wanted to be with her. Despite knowing he loved her, she had been afraid that after everything he might be having doubts about them and their relationship.

"There's nothing to think about. I'd love to come with you Paul. I really would." she told him. She smiled as he lifted their joined hands and she felt his lips brush over her knuckles.

"Good. It could be like a fresh start for us you know, a chance to be together and really get to know one another."

He sighed as he sat back in his chair, his left hand raking through his blonde strands.

"I guess I just want to do this properly, Steph. I feel like this whole relationship between you and me has been tarnished from the start with all the hurt and the lies."

Stephanie felt the hot lump in her throat and she swallowed thickly as tears sprung to her eyes once more.

"I'm so sorry, Paul. If it wasn't for my dishonesty from the start, none of this would be happening."

Paul shook his head sternly. "I told you Steph. No more placing blame. Not where you and I are concerned."

He got up from the chair and the bed lightly creaked underneath his weight as he sat beside Stephanie on the bed. He wrapped his arm around her and she rested her head on his shoulder breathing him in.

"We're going to get through this baby. I promise."

Her lips curved into a shaky smile as she felt him kiss the top of her head. Suddenly she didn't doubt that they would find a way through this. She knew she was so lucky to have Paul. With him by her side, she felt like anything was possible.

"So it looks like my friend likes your friend." said Paul.

Stephanie snorted with laughter in spite of herself. She lifted her head to look at Paul and she leant into him as his hand gently stroked her face.

"I'm glad I got to see that smile of yours again." he said, his thumb tracing over chin.

He kissed her softly before pulling her into his arms and holding her close.

"Everything is going to be okay Stephanie. We just have to give it time but I promise you, things will get better."

Stephanie closed her eyes and sighed softly as she buried her face in his chest. She knew Paul was right. Even although the pain of their loss was still fresh, at least she could still see a glimmer of hope for the future. A future that included her and Paul together no matter what and that's more than she could have ever hoped for. It was all she wanted.


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

His kitchen resembled a disaster zone. Paul lightly chuckled as he surveyed the mess in front of him noticing that there didn't seem to be a spare inch of space on the counters. Various items were strewn across them; items he hadn't even been aware he had possessed up until now. Stephanie was standing just in front of him, her back facing him as suddenly she threw down the spatula in her hand.

"Damn it!"

Paul's face flickered with amusement as he tentatively approached her. "I take it things aren't going too well in here then." 

Stephanie whirled round at the sound of his voice and her face lit up as she beamed at him. "Hey, you're back. I wasn't expecting you home for another couple of hours." 

She wiped her hands on the legs of her jeans as Paul reached for her, sliding his arms around her hips.

"I couldn't stay away any longer."

His long finger dabbed curiously at her nose which had some sort of mixture at the end of it. He licked at it, his nose crinkling as he pondered over the taste.

"Hmmm, not bad." he commented affectionately kissing the end of her nose. "What are you making?"

Stephanie's shoulders rose and fell with her defeated sigh. "Well I was trying to bake some cookies and stuff but they haven't turned out quite how I'd like." 

Paul looked over at the tray she was gesturing towards and he couldn't stifle his amused snort at the sight of the burnt, blackened cupcakes.

"Wow. You do know you could do some serious damage to your teeth with those things." 

Stephanie pretended to scowl as she slapped at his arm playfully. "Hey, be nice. I did try." 

"I know you did and I'm sure next time, they'll be practically edible." 

She rolled her eyes dryly. "I go to all this trouble and this is the thanks I get. It's a wonder I put up with you." 

"You put up with me because you love me." 

She bit down on her lip in a vain attempt to stifle her smile but the corners of her mouth twitched back at him.

"You sound pretty sure of yourself." 

Paul lifted his shoulder in a shrug as he smirked back at her. "That's because I am."

He kissed her softly once more before stepping away as his fingers reached up to fumble with his tie, loosening it from around his neck.

"So, did your meeting go well?" asked Stephanie as she walked over to the counter and began to tackle her mess. 

"Yeah, it did."

Paul paused for a moment as he opened the door of the refrigerator and reached in to grab a beer.

"They want me to draw up some plans for a new development of houses they want to build."

The door clicked shut behind him as he twisted off the cap and took a mouthful of the cold liquid. He lightly grimaced as he swallowed and it hit the back of his throat.

"So, what made you decide to do all this?" he asked as he wandered over to Stephanie. 

She lifted her shoulder in a shrug as she placed the dirty cutlery in the dishwasher. "I was bored to be honest."

She sighed as she closed the door and started the machine.

"I'm getting restless now I'm starting to feel better and I know it's only been a couple of weeks but I was thinking of phoning the office and getting them to send some manuscripts over so I can work on them. I just need something to do, you know."

Paul's brown eyes were understanding as he placed his bottle down on the counter and took her in his arms. 

"I know. And I guess me going back to work hasn't helped." 

Stephanie shook her head as she placed her hands on his chest. "You had to go back, Paul. I mean, don't get me wrong, it's been great spending the last couple of weeks with you. And being here, it's really helped me cope with everything."

She paused as he dropped a kiss in her hair.

"But I just want to try and get on with my life now. That's why I want to get back to work and try and get things back to normal. Well, as normal as possible." 

Paul sighed softly as Stephanie rested her head against his chest. He hoped that she wasn't rushing into anything. The whole grieving and healing process took time for both of them. But he did have to admit, Stephanie was definitely looking a lot better since coming here and her spirits had certainly lifted during the past couple of weeks. Sure, they were both still hurting after losing the baby but somewhere between all the pain and the tears, they had managed to find a way to cope with their grief. They were finding a way to live with what had happened. And it wasn't just their loss that had brought them closer together. They had also spent a lot of time just talking and getting to know one another properly. It felt good to be just a normal couple and not have all the emotional baggage attached to their relationship.

"If you want to get back to work, then that's fine with me." said Paul as he stepped back and brushed his fingers through the loose strands of hair that framed her face. "But only if you promise to take it easy." 

Stephanie smiled back at him, touched by the obvious concern in his deep brown eyes as he watched her.

"I will." she told him. "It won't be full time or anything like that. Just enough to keep me occupied. Plus it will save me trying to burn your kitchen down." 

"That's true. Maybe you should make sure and call the office first thing in the morning." 

Stephanie swatted his arm playfully before leaning her head back against his chest and feeling his low chuckle as his big hand rubbed slowly across her back. God, she owed him so much. Paul had been her rock ever since the miscarriage. She didn't know how she would have coped without him. He had been there for her through every tear and every low and it was because of him she had found the strength to move on and try to get on with her life. She had stopped trying to blame herself for everything. Paul had encouraged her to let go the past and think about the future and with him by her side, the future was definitely something to look forward to.  
Just then the phone started to ring. Stephanie felt Paul's heavy sigh as he reluctantly let go of her.

"I knew I shouldn't have gone in today. Now all people want to do is hassle me." 

Stephanie smiled as he picked the call and mouthed she was going upstairs. He nodded in acknowledgment as he raked his fingers through his hair and answered.

"Hello?" 

"That isn't my prodigal son actually on the end of the phone?" 

Paul shook his head and chuckled down the phone. "Hey Mom. How are you?" 

"I'm feeling neglected. I just thought I'd call so I could remember what my son's voice actually sounds like." 

"Very funny mother and I get the point. I've just been busy, you know." 

"Obviously, considering I haven't seen you for a few weeks."

There was a pause as he shifted his feet on the floor.

"How was New York?" 

His mother's question threw him and Paul was dumbstruck for a second as he wondered how the hell she knew he had been in New York. Then it suddenly dawned on him. Jennifer Hall. He rolled his eyes dryly.

"I take it you've been talking to Lynn." 

"Yes, I have. Jennifer told her all about that book launch in Boston. She said you abandoned her to go after that girl." 

He heard the underlying tone in her voice and Paul sighed as he picked up his bottle of beer from the counter. The way this conversation was going, he might just need it.

"I didn't abandon her Mom. And "that girl" as you put it, her name is Stephanie." 

He heard his mother snort indignantly down the line as he took a drink of his beer.

"I wouldn't know her name Paul considering I've never met the girl. I don't know anything about her apart from the fact she's married." 

Paul swallowed and leant his shoulder against the wall. "Yes, well she's not with Shawn anymore. She's staying here with me."

"What! Paul, are you crazy? You hardly know the girl."

"Maybe but I love her Mom." 

He listened to the silent pause at the end of the phone which was followed by a heavy sigh.

"All I've wanted is for you to be happy, son. I just never imagined it would be with your best friend's wife." 

"Yeah well I didn't plan for this to happen, you know. But from the moment I saw her, I found myself falling for her. Steph means the world to me, Mom. She makes me happy."

"But what about Shawn's happiness?" 

Paul ran his fingers through his hair and scowled as the beer dangled from his other hand. He felt the anger start to burn in his chest, anger he'd somehow managed to quench since they'd left New York.

"I don't care about Shawn. Not any more. He's caused a lot of pain for me and Steph and we're still trying to get over it." He paused for a second as he felt his composure shake just a little. He rolled his lips together keeping it under control.

"I'd tell you about it Ma but I can't. Not right now." 

"It's okay, Paul. I understand."

He felt relief wash over him knowing his mother wouldn't pursue it.

"Look, I'm not going to pass judgement." she continued. "You say you love Stephanie and she makes you happy. Well, that's all that matters to me. I love you Paul. You're my son and I only want what's best for you." 

Paul's lips twitched with his smile. "Thanks Mom. That means a lot." 

"Well, you can show your appreciation by coming to see me. And bring Stephanie with you. I want to meet the girl who's stolen my son's heart." 

He chuckled in spite of himself. "There's no need to be so dramatic about it." 

"Well, I'm only telling the truth. Why don't you both come for dinner tomorrow night? Your father and I will be over the moon to see you." 

"Okay, you win. We'll come tomorrow. What time do you want us there?" 

"Seven will do fine. Anyway, I'll let you go. Your father is in danger of ruining dinner if I let him loose in the kitchen any longer. I'll see you tomorrow Paul. I love you." 

"I love you too Mom. Bye." 

Paul smiled as he hung up the phone and as he made his way to the staircase, he felt his anger and his anxiety slowly start to slip away. Their conversation had gone a lot better than he had expected. He was pleasantly surprised at his Mom's reaction once she had calmed down but at the same time, he expected nothing less. His parents had always supported him through his life no matter what and that would never change. Now all he needed to do was talk to Stephanie. He just hoped she didn't mind him making dinner arrangements without her and that she didn't find meeting his family such a daunting prospect. 

Paul frowned as he reached the end of the landing and saw the bedroom was empty. However, his frown soon turned into a smile as he heard the singing coming from the adjoining bathroom. He knocked on the wood and popped his head round the open doorway and grinned at Stephanie who was lying in the bath submerged in bubbles.

"Nice singing there, Steph." 

Stephanie jumped at the sound of his voice, causing some water to spill over the side as she scowled back at him.

"I didn't hear you come in." 

"I did knock but your voice must have drowned it out." grinned Paul as he sat on the edge of the tub. "I see the mirrors are still in one piece though." 

Stephanie stuck her tongue out as she passed Paul the dripping wet cloth. "For that, you can wash my back." 

"And you know, I don't mind doing any other hard-to-reach places once I'm done." he winked as he wrung out the material. 

"We'll see. It all depends on how good a job you do on my back." 

Paul chuckled as she sat forward and he began to rub small circles across her soft, smooth skin. 

"So, did you sort out whoever was on the phone?" 

Paul nodded as he moved the cloth across her shoulders. "It was my Mom." 

Stephanie leant back against the tub stopping him. Her blue eyes studied him carefully. "Did she give you a hard time for not calling her?" 

He nodded once more as he shifted on the ledge. "She knew I was in New York. Jennifer told Lynn who told Mom of course." 

Stephanie pushed back the damp strands hair which had fallen across her face making the water splash around her as she looked at him tentatively. "What did she say?" 

Paul lifted his shoulder in a shrug. "Well at first she gave me a bit of a hard time knowing you were married to Shawn. But once she realised how I felt about you, she gave up. She told me she just wanted me to be happy which I am." 

He paused as Stephanie felt the relief wash over her knowing Paul's mom had accepted things albeit reluctantly. She knew from talking to him just how much his family meant to him. They were so important in his life. The last thing she wanted to do was cause a rift between them. 

"She also invited us to dinner tomorrow night."

His brown eyes stared back at her pensively and Stephanie simply nodded and smiled.

"Okay." 

"Really?" he asked, surprised. 

She reached for his hand taking it in hers as their fingers slowly slid together.

"Really. I know your family is important to you, Paul." 

Paul bent down to kiss her but laughed as Stephanie brought her hands up to his face, covering him in water and bubbles as the wetness seeped through the cotton material of his shirt.

"You're soaking me." 

"Well, why don't you just take off your clothes and join me? There's plenty of room for two." she smiled. 

Paul was hesitant as he looked into her eyes. Apart from kissing and hugging each other, there had been no other physical contact between them since the miscarriage. Of course, the main reason for that had been the doctor's instructions and the risk of infection but Paul had also been consciously keeping his distance. He knew that Stephanie was still all over the place, at least emotionally. Any move had to come from her when she was good and ready. He wasn't going to force the issue with her no matter how badly he wanted her. And God, did he want her. He had never needed or wanted anyone so badly in his life. She was like the very air he breathed. 

"I just want to be close to you, Paul."

Her blue eyes almost seemed to plead with him as she tugged on his hand shyly.

"Just come and hold me?" 

Stephanie watched as he nodded his head and his thick fingers began to fumble with the buttons of his shirt. Her body was literally tingling at the thought of his touch and as he shrugged the material from his shoulders, she swallowed thickly as she admired his smooth, muscular chest. He pulled down the zipper on his trousers. God, Paul really was a beautiful man and her body's response to simply watching him undress told her just how much she wanted him. But despite her desire for him, she knew she wasn't ready for anything physical. At least, not yet. It all felt far too soon and the truth was she was so scared of taking that next step with him.

Of course her fear hadn't really been an issue before now. She couldn't have entered into anything physical with Paul even if she wanted to. But now that she could, she was holding back from being with him. She didn't know why. But as much as she was clueless about her fear, she also knew she didn't want to feel that way. She wanted to be close to Paul. That was why she had asked him to join her in the tub. She wanted to feel that intimacy between them again and hopefully having him close, it would encourage her to want to eventually take things further. 

She shivered slightly, her stomach pooling with her desire as he pushed his black briefs down his thick thighs. As he stepped in the tub, she moved to let him sit behind her. When he was finally settled, Stephanie leant into him, resting her back against his chest. His gentle heat soothed her and she closed her eyes as he slid his arms around her and kissed her temple. 

"Thank you." she whispered. 

"And what are you thanking me for exactly?" 

Stephanie opened her eyes and lifted her shoulder in a shy shrug. "Just for being so understanding and patient with me."

She tilted her head towards him and her hand lifted to touch his face as she met his gentle chocolate pools.

"I don't know why but I'm just not ready to take things to that next level. And it's not because I don't want you. Because believe me, I do. I guess I just need a little more time." 

Paul smiled back at her reassuringly, his hand covering hers as it rested on his face. "Yeah well, there's no rush. Trust me. We've got all the time in the world and when you're ready, I'll be there. Okay?"

"Okay." she smiled.

Just then Paul began to kiss her stealing her breath away. Stephanie tangled her fingers in his hair as she kissed him back hoping he could feel just how much she loved him and how much she did want him. It felt so wonderful being like this with him and being close to him once more. Paul meant absolutely everything to her. He was the beat of her heart; her life. And a life that she would never live without him ever again. 


	23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

Stephanie swore her stomach was doing somersaults as she followed Paul up the small winding path. Gripping his hand a little more tightly, she stared ahead at the pretty red brick house; Paul's parents' house.

Biting down on the inside of her lip, she let out a calming breath. To say she was nervous about this whole dinner was a massive understatement. After all, she wasn't an idiot. She knew Paul's parents had to have some preconceived notions about her. She was a married woman and not only that a married woman who had cheated on her husband with his best friend. It didn't exactly inspire his mother to throw out the welcome mat for her and she couldn't help but worry that tonight just might be a disaster. Still, she was going to try her best to make a good impression for Paul's sake more than anything else. He hadn't really said anything to her as such but she knew tonight was pretty important to him. His family was important too. That's why she was going to make the effort and try her best not to be a complete nervous wreck.

Stephanie felt the knots in her stomach twist just that little bit more as Paul opened the white painted door. His foot lingered on the step as he turned and smiled at her. But that smile faded as his concerned brown eyes took in her pensive expression.

"Are you okay?" he asked gently.

Letting out a slow breath, Stephanie slowly nodded her head, the corner of her mouth trembling with her troubled smile. Paul squeezed her hand as he dropped a kiss in her hair.

"Tonight will be fine, Steph. Try not to worry."

She nodded once more but her heart was pounding as she followed his massive frame into the house. As the door clicked shut behind them, she glanced around the prettily decorated hallway silently praying that somehow she didn't screw this up.

"Hey Mom."

Stephanie felt Paul's fingers slip from hers as he greeted his mother. She suddenly felt cold without him as she turned and watched him pull the small grey haired lady into a hug. Despite her anxiety, her lips twitched with her smile as Paul practically engulfed her. It was obvious he didn't get his height from his mother's side of the family which meant it had to be from his father.

Just then Paul broke the embrace, turning to grin at her. "Steph, this is my Mom. Mom, Steph."

The blood was beating in Stephanie's ears as her fingers twisted together nervously. Her blue eyes slowly lifted to look at the woman now standing in front of her. That was when she felt her nerves slowly start to slip away as she saw the kind face smiling back at her.

"It's nice to finally meet you Stephanie."

She was pleasantly surprised when she was pulled into a brief hug and her smile was genuine this time when she stepped back to stand next to Paul.

"It's so nice to meet you too. Paul has told me lots about you."

"Don't believe a word he told you. My son has a tendency to exaggerate the truth."

Stephanie turned her head to see the man who could only be Paul's father approach them slapping his hand affectionately across his son's shoulder.

Paul grinned back at him. "I think you're confusing me with Mom."

As Patricia glared at him sternly, he held his hands up in the air and chuckled.

"You know I'm just ribbing, Ma."

"You'd better be." she replied as she playfully swatted at him. "You're not too old to feel the back of my hand, you know."

Stephanie smiled as she watched Paul interact with his parents feeling the closeness that they obviously shared. She was close with her family too despite the air miles that existed between them and it was nice to be with someone who understood that closeness and seemed to share the same family values as her.

"You'll have to forgive my son's manners for not introducing us. It must be another trait he picked up from his mother."

She chuckled as Paul's father approached her and pulled her into a brief welcoming hug.

"It's nice to meet you Stephanie." he smiled and he stepped back, turning to his son.

"You didn't tell me she was this beautiful."

"She is beautiful, isn't she?" Paul smirked and Stephanie felt the heat rush to her cheeks.

"Stop it, the pair of you. You're embarrassing the poor girl." chuckled Patricia as she grabbed her husband's arm and guided him into the adjoining room.

Stephanie bit down shyly on her lip as Paul took her hand and his brown eyes sparkled back at her as he flipped her a wink.

"Come on beautiful, let's go eat."

She giggled as she followed him through to the spacious living room suddenly realising she felt completely at ease. Her anxiety was gone. Her stomach was no longer performing acrobatics. Maybe, just maybe, tonight wouldn't turn out so badly after all.

* * *

Paul collapsed on the sofa beside Stephanie tossing aside a cushion as his big hand lifted to rub at his bloated stomach. "I shouldn't have had that last piece of pie."

His mother shook her head. "You know I forgot how much you could eat. It's just as well you work out so much because you'd be the size of a house by now."

Her kind eyes smiled at Stephanie.

"Does he eat that much at home?"

"Not usually." she chuckled. "I've never seen him eat as much as he did tonight that's for sure."

Paul grinned. "It's Mom's home cooking that does it."

"I'm pretty sure Stephanie can cook just as well as your mother can."

He snorted at his father's comment and Stephanie couldn't help but smile at his reaction. She knew her talents didn't lie in the kitchen and she wasn't ashamed to admit it. She shrugged her shoulders as she looked over at his parents.

"I'm not very good in the kitchen." she confessed.

Patricia smiled back at her. "Nor was I until I had a family. It's amazing the skills you develop when you have to whip up meals for your kids. You'll probably find you'll get better too when you have children of your own."

Stephanie swallowed awkwardly as she felt an ache in her chest and she shifted her gaze to her hands that were clasped loosely in her lap. As she let out a shaky breath, she felt Paul gently squeeze her leg and she tilted her head in his direction. His brow was crinkled with his concern and she offered her a smile, letting him know she was okay.

Both of them were unaware that Patricia was watching them with a worried expression on her face. "I'm sorry. Did I speak out of turn just now."

Stephanie immediately shook her head and turned to her. "You didn't. I guess you just threw me a little, that's all."

Paul's mother nodded and smiled but it was clear she was a little confused by what was happening. His father was too and she knew they deserved to know the truth. It was only fair. She glanced at Paul reaching to touch his hand.

"You should tell them Paul." she told him, encouragingly.

He sighed softly and nodded his head. Paul knew Stephanie was right and his heart was heavy as they looked between his parents. He could see the worry that was etched on their faces and he knew he had to tell them. Still, it wasn't going to be easy saying it out loud. While he had accepted that he'd lost a child, it still killed him inside. The loss was like a constant ache in his gut; an ache that would only ever fade with time. Both his and Stephanie's pain was still so fresh.

"Paul?"

He cleared his throat and looked at his mother. She was watching him carefully, her fingers twisting anxiously. He pushed himself up the cushions, his fingers raking through his hair as Stephanie's hand slid through his.

"Well, there's no easy way to tell you this so I guess I'll just come out and say it."

He sniffed, briefly glancing down at the floor as he sighed softly.

"We lost a child a couple of weeks ago."

Within seconds, his mother was embracing Stephanie, her concerned eyes scanning her beautiful face.

"Oh Stephanie, I'm so sorry. I should have never mentioned children in the first place."

Stephanie shook her head as her fingers touched her arm. "It wasn't your fault. You couldn't have known."

Her blue eyes drifted past Patricia's shoulder to see Paul and his father embracing. She swore she could see tears in his eyes as he broke away but when he eventually turned to face them, they had disappeared making her think she had imagined them. He took her hand once more and squeezed it as his parents sat back down across from them.

Patricia looked across at her son tentatively. "Does this have anything to do with what you said about Shawn yesterday?"

Paul slowly nodded his head. "It was Shawn's fault Stephanie lost the baby."

He saw Patricia go to say something but he held his hand up silencing her.

"Please Mom. I'd rather not talk about it right now."

She pressed her lips together and nodded her head. She knew her son. She knew not to push it. He was still hurting and it was probably still too raw for him to talk about it. She'd respect his space and give him the time that he needed. Besides, he knew exactly where she would be when he was ready to tell her.

* * *

Stephanie rested her head back against the pillows shifting her body underneath the sheets. She could hear the water running in the bathroom as her thoughts turned to the dinner. Honestly, she couldn't believe how well tonight had gone. Paul's parents had been such wonderful people and so nice too. She could see where Paul got a lot of his traits from. He was such a wonderful guy and the more she learned about him, the more desperate she was to get to know him even better. To know what he was thinking. To know his hopes, his dreams, his fears. To know absolutely every little detail about the man she was so in love with. Even getting to see what he looked like as a baby.

Stephanie chuckled to herself as she adjusted the covers around her waist and remembered the conversation she had shared with Paul's parents. They had been more than willing to share childhood stories about their son and even eager to show her the photographs that accompanied them. The baby pictures in particular had been cute. Paul had been a gorgeous baby albeit just that little bit chubby.

"What's so funny over there?"

Stephanie looked up at the sound of Paul's voice and saw him standing in the doorway watching her, his thick arms crossed over his bare chest and his boxer shorts sitting low on his hips. She felt that familiar tingling in her chest as she smiled at him.

"I was just remembering those baby pictures of you. How many chins did you have again?"

Paul glowered at her and ran over to the bed, grabbing a pillow as he jumped on top of her, hitting her with it mercilessly. Stephanie squealed and giggled as he continued his assault.

"I'm sorry, Paul. I'm sorry."

After swatting her one more time, he grinned at her. Stephanie smirked back as she pushed back her messy brown strands.

"I still can't believe how chubby you were though."

She snorted with her laughter as Paul shook his head. His brown eyes surveyed her for a moment before they twinkled mischievously and before she knew it, his right hand had pinned her arm down and he had straddled her.

"You're asking for trouble now McMahon."

She shrieked as his fingers poked her sides and began to tickle her. She thrashed around on the bed as she tried to break free.

"No Paul, please. Stop it!"

Paul grinned eventually stopping only to grab Stephanie's wrists and pin them above her head, sinking them into the soft pillows

"You've hurt my feelings you know. No-one's ever called me chubby before."

Stephanie pretended to pout her lips in an apology as she batted her big blue eyes at him. "I'm sorry. I meant it in a nice way, you know. I happen to like chubby."

She felt Paul's warm breath dance on her face as he moved closer towards her. She subconsciously licked her lips as she eagerly anticipated his kiss. However, she was soon disappointed as he let her go and sat back up.

"You know I don't know if I feel comfortable kissing someone who thinks I'm fat."

Stephanie shook her head and laughed at his pitiful expression. "I never said you were fat, Paul."

She rested her palms over his well chiselled stomach and began to rub them in small circles over the firm, tight muscle.

"And you've most definitely got rid of the chubbiness."

As her blue eyes glinted at him, Paul drew in a sharp breath as her hand hovered teasingly above his shorts. Unable to help himself, he lowered his face towards her and pressed his lips against hers in a searing kiss. His tongue gently explored her mouth making her moan softly before he pulled away, gently pulling on her bottom lip as he did so and brushing back the hair from Stephanie's face.

"I love you, you know." he smiled.

"I love you too."

Paul kissed Stephanie's forehead and switching off the small lamp, he climbed into bed beside her. His legs tangled in the sheets as he pulled her into his arms and felt Stephanie snuggle into his chest. As he lay in the darkness, he wondered if she could feel his heart beat. It was pounding loudly in his chest after their little kissing session and God knows it had taken all he had not to take the kiss further but he didn't want to ruin things and put any pressure on Stephanie. She needed space and time. He'd just have to try his best to be patient and in the meantime settle for more than his fair share of cold showers.

Silently chuckling to himself, he listened to Stephanie's breathing even out. Within a matter of moments his own eyelids began to get heavy and tightening his arms around her, Paul closed his eyes as her breathing lulled him to sleep.


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

Stephanie surveyed her surroundings as the elevator door slid shut behind her. The offices were bright and modern and definitely much bigger than she had imagined them to be. The flurry of activity around here was busy and almost hectic and it was obvious Paul ran a very successful company.

Feeling a rush of pride at his accomplishment, Stephanie looked towards the huge window that practically took in the whole wall. That's where she spotted the reception area. Adjusting the bag on her shoulder, she quickly made her way over, her heels clicking against the highly polished floor. The young blonde-haired girl smiled at her from behind the desk.

"Hi. Can I help you?"

Stephanie smiled back. "Yes, I'm Stephanie McMahon. I'm here to see Paul Levesque."

The young girl grinned and stood up, stretching out her hand towards her. "Stephanie, it's so nice to meet you. My name's Lauren."

"Well, it's nice to meet you too." Stephanie replied feeling a little taken aback by her eager response as she shook her hand. Lauren seemed to be brimming with excitement and she hadn't a clue why.

"Paul's told us all about you, you know." beamed Lauren. "We've all been dying to meet you."

Just then a tall, handsome, dark-haired man appeared waving a stack of papers. "I need these to go by overnight courier."

Lauren nodded her head before licking her lips and gesturing her head in Stephanie's direction. "Scott, this lady here is Paul's girlfriend, Stephanie."

Scott whirled round, grinning at her. He held out his hand. "Stephanie, it's a pleasure."

Stephanie bit back her amusement as she shook his hand. His blue eyes sparkled back at her as he leant against the desk.

"Paul must have forgotten to mention how hot you were."

"That's because quite frankly it's none of your goddamn business how hot she is."

Scott immediately straightened himself up as he heard Paul's voice behind him. Stephanie tried not to laugh at the sheepish look he had on his face as he turned round to face his boss.

"I'm sorry. I was just trying to be polite and make conversation."

Paul raised his eyebrow trying his best to appear intimidating but she could see the flicker of amusement in his face giving the game away. "I'm sure you were."

Scott slowly began to back towards his desk. "Anyway, I'd better go and finish that report. You know, the one that's due any time now."

"Good idea."

Paul's lips curved into a smirk as he watched him walk away. Stephanie was pleasantly surprised when he then reached over to kiss her cheek.

"So, I take it you've met Lauren." he asked her.

Stephanie nodded as she looked between the young girl and Paul. "Yes I have."

"Good. If you want to come with me, I'll just grab my jacket and we can go."

Paul placed his hand on the small of her back as they walked towards the hallway where his office was located. She tried not to laugh at the peering eyes from behind the cubicle desks as they walked through the open plan area. No doubt her appearance would be the hot topic of conversation.

But the people behind the desks were the last thing on her mind as Paul shut the door behind him and Stephanie gasped in surprise as he grabbed her from behind, pulling her round to face him. He clutched her hair in his hand as his lips crashed down on hers. She eagerly returned his kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck and moaning softly as his tongue teased her lower lip before brushing over hers. Even though the kiss was brief she found herself struggling to catch her breath when they broke apart.

"You've just made my day a whole lot better." Paul grinned as his fingers toyed with the ends of her hair.

Stephanie smiled as she wrapped her arms around him, snuggling into his chest and savouring his gentle warmth. "Are you having a bad day?"

"You could say that. One of our major clients is being a pain in the ass. Apparently he's not happy with the plans that our guys have come up with so I think I need to step in and sort it out."

She pulled away to smile at him. "The perks of being the boss, huh?"

Paul scowled causing his nose to wrinkle cutely. "Yeah but it's not the kind of perks I was looking for. Not when it means having to fly out to New York."

"When do you have to go?"

His apologetic brown eyes met hers. "Tomorrow. It shouldn't take more than a couple of days though, I promise."

He paused as his hand rested under her chin, his thumb lightly tracing her skin.

"Will you be okay on your own?" he asked her.

Stephanie nodded her head and smiled to reassure him. However, her blue eyes turned thoughtful as she looked back at him. "Or I could always tag along with you, if you don't mind. I was thinking I could go and sort out things at work and while I'm at it, catch up with Melissa."

"Are you sure you're feeling up to it?"

Stephanie saw the concern in his eyes and she was touched but honestly, she didn't have a problem with returning home. And after all, it was only for a couple of days and Paul would be there when he wasn't working. "I'm sure." she smiled as she cupped his face with her hand.

Paul turned, lightly brushing his lips over her thumb. "In that case, we'd better get your flight arranged."

Grabbing his jacket, he pulled it on and flicked his blonde strands over the collar. He led her out of the office and she saw Lauren smile brightly as they approached her desk together.

"Stephanie's coming with me to New York. Can you could book her on the same flight as me tomorrow morning?" he asked her.

"Of course. I'll do it straight away."

Paul smiled at her. "Thanks. I should be back in an hour or so."

"Okay. Have a nice lunch."

Lauren felt a tap on her shoulder as she watched Paul and Stephanie walk hand in hand to the elevator. She turned round to see Elizabeth, a middle-aged secretary who worked for Steve, Paul's right-hand man. She was the kind of woman who craved on gossip but she was harmless enough. And it was common knowledge she had always had a soft spot for Paul.

"Was that her?"

"It was. They make a lovely couple, don't they?"

Elizabeth nodded and smiled. "It's nice to see so Paul happy too. He's a good man."

"And he's just asked me to book Stephanie a flight. Apparently she's going with him to New York tomorrow."

The secretary stroked her chin thoughtfully as she watched the elevator doors close over. "Really? You know he's never involved work with his personal life before. He must be serious about this one. I predict wedding bells before long and you know me, I'm very rarely wrong about these things."

Lauren laughed as Elizabeth walked off still deep in thought. She knew that before the day was out, she'd have everyone placing bets on a wedding date in yet another one of her infamous office pools.

* * *

"Guess whose coming to New York tomorrow?"

Stephanie held the phone away from her ear as Melissa screamed down the phone and laughed at her friend's excitement at her news.

"I'm glad you've missed me." she grinned.

"Of course I have. It's been weird not having you around to talk to and I don't know but phone calls, they just aren't the same."

Stephanie smiled knowing what she meant. She had missed Melissa too since she had been here and that was part of the reason why she had wanted to go with Paul to New York. She was desperate to see her friend. Of course the other reason was getting to be with Paul. Even though it was only a couple of days, she would have hated staying here without him. Call her pathetic, but she even missed him when he was gone for only a matter of hours. But she was so happy when she was with him; so happy that at times she thought her heart might burst.

Smiling to herself, Stephanie sat down on the bed, drawing her right knee to her chest as she flicked her hair over her shoulder.

"But you've obviously not been sitting in and wallowing over my absence." she teased. "Where have you been? I tried calling you earlier on but there was no answer."

She heard the silent pause at the other end and it intrigued her to say the least especially when she knew that her silence meant a man was probably involved. She knew her friend far too well at times.

"Melissa, spill it. Who is he and more importantly do I know him?" she asked impatiently.

"You know him."

Stephanie's eyes widened in wonder.

"And so does Paul."

The light bulb immediately went off in her head.

"You mean Kevin, don't you?"

Melissa's silence spoke volumes and this time it was Stephanie's turn to scream down the phone. She caught Paul's attention as he walked into the bedroom. He raised his eyebrows inquisitively at the grin on her face. She chuckled as she covered the mouthpiece with her hand.

"Mel's been on a date with Kevin."

Paul's mouth curved into an amused smirk. "That sly old bastard."

His big hand reached into his trouser pocket and he pulled out his cell phone. As he wandered out into the brightly lit hallway punching in the numbers, he heard Stephanie's laughter behind him. Of course, she knew exactly what he was up to. His friend was about to get a grilling care of yours truly. It's about time the guy knew it what it felt like to have a friend meddling in your personal business.

The phone let out a few rings before Paul heard the grunt that crackled down the line.

"Have I woken you up Kev?" he chuckled.

His reply was another disgruntled grunt.

"I guess Melissa must have tired you out. I mean an old guy like you must have really struggled to keep up with a young thing like her."

"How the hell do you know?" barked Kevin.

"Well, she is Stephanie's best friend."

"Those damn women. So I take it you're calling me so you and Stephanie can sit and compare notes later."

Paul chuckled with amusement as he sat down on the top stair leaning against the wooden banister. His fingers lifted to rake through his hair as he shifted on the carpet.

"No. Actually I'm calling to ask just how the hell a cheap skate like you managed to snag a girl like her."

Kevin's laughter echoed down the line.

"It's charm my friend. Five minutes alone with me and any girl would be completely smitten."

"I guess it would take that long for the drugs to kick in."

"Oh you're full of it tonight Levesque.

"I try." Paul grinned.

"So, how are things with you anyway? I've not heard from you for a while."

He slowly nodded as Paul stretched out his right leg in front of him. "Good. Things are definitely a lot better now and Steph, she's doing really well. In fact, she's feeling well enough to come with me to New York tomorrow."

Paul didn't see Kevin's face fall at the other end. He didn't realise he had just given him the worst possible news in the world. He and Stephanie were coming to New York on the very day Shawn had decided to come home. He'd been in hiding ever since that day he'd attacked Stephanie in the office and Shawn had called him just this morning. Kevin just prayed to God that Paul had no plans to come to Shawn's apartment. He had no doubt all hell would break loose if he did.

"So, I take it there's still no word about Shawn?"

Kevin silently cursed under his breath and tried to reassure himself he was doing the right thing as he lied to Paul.

"No. No-one's heard from him. If he's not back by next week, I need to think about heading back to Miami I guess."

Paul gritted his teeth together as he scowled, staring straight ahead. Right now, he wouldn't give a damn if Shawn never returned. And Kevin was mad for sticking around especially when the bastard didn't even the common courtesy to let him know where he was.

"Well, if he does call, I want to know." he told his friend. "He's not getting away with what's he's done Kev. I mean it."

Kevin nervously scratched at his beard at the other end. He knew his friend meant it and that was why he had to keep him away. Paul and Shawn would kill each other when they finally got together. He just wished he knew how the hell to contact Shawn so he could tell him to stay put where he was at least until he knew Paul was safely out of New York. He quickly decided to change the subject. He was starting to feel nauseous even thinking about it.

"So, will I see your sorry ass when you're visiting here?"

"I'm sure I can squeeze you in."

"Gee thanks. Don't go to any trouble on my account."

"Trust me, I won't." Paul chuckled. "Listen, I'll give you a call tomorrow. Once I'm in New York, I'll get a better idea of how things are going."

"Sure. Take care man and by the way, when you're talking to Steph later, tell her I was an animal between the sheets."

Paul snorted with laughter as he pushed himself to his feet. "I'm not that good a liar, Kev. Besides five minutes hardly makes you an animal now does it? See ya buddy."

Grinning, he hung up before Kevin could make a comeback. As Paul walked back in the direction of the bedroom, he noticed that Stephanie was now in bed, her brown hair fanned across the pillow as the covers lay pooled around her chest. He walked across and sat down on the edge of the bed beside her. Her blue eyes sparkled, smiling up at him as he brushed her hair behind her ear.

"So, did you give him a hard time?" she asked him.

"Nah. I went easy on him. But I'm pretty sure he likes her."

"Well Melissa is totally smitten with him. She thinks he's absolutely wonderful."

Paul shook his head in disbelief as he let out a yawn. His big hand lifted to cover his mouth and Stephanie's brow crinkled with concern as she reached for his fingers.

"You look tired, Paul. You should come to bed."

He sighed softly as he slowly shook his head. "I wish I could babe but I need to do some work for this meeting tomorrow afternoon. It shouldn't take me long though, an hour or two at the most."

Stephanie tugged on his hand pulling him down to her. Their lips were practically touching as she looked deeply into his eyes.

"I'm sure it can wait until the morning. I need you, Paul." she whispered.

Her ocean blue pools flickered black with her desire and Paul swallowed thickly, knowing her intentions and feeling pleasantly surprised. After all, it had only been a matter of days ago that Stephanie had told him she didn't feel ready for this. But judging by the way she was looking at him now, something had changed. Something he wasn't going to question; not when he needed Stephanie and wanted her so badly.

As Paul felt her warm breath on his face, her lips gently grazed his and he couldn't hold back longer. His eyes closed as their mouths met in a kiss. Placing his arm around her, he laid her down on the bed. He felt her fingers tangle in his hair as he deepened the kiss, his tongue brushing against hers as it entered her mouth. She tasted so sweet and familiar to him and every ounce of restraint he'd held onto since Stephanie had confessed her fears to him quickly disappeared as Paul let his natural desire for her take over.

Stephanie moaned softly as she felt Paul's hand move downwards, pushing up her silk nightdress and slowly bringing her up the pillows, he pulled it up over her head before laying her back down against the sheets. His hand felt hot as it touched her skin and it tingled in anticipation. He brushed back the hair from her neck, his mouth nipping and sucking on her throat. Stephanie's mouth felt dry and her body shivered with pleasure as his hand gently squeezed her left breast. Her back arched into him. It had been so long since she had felt his touch and she craved everything he had to offer. All her fear and hesitation seemed to disappear as her body responded to Paul. God, he felt so incredible. They had both been through so much lately and it meant everything to be so close to him. She loved him more than she had ever thought it was possible to love someone. She was ready to show him what her words could never truly express and more importantly than that, she was finally ready for forever with him.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

Stephanie smiled dreamily as her eyes fluttered open, her hand reaching out to search for the firm, warm body she had fallen asleep next to. But as her fingers clutched the cold, crumpled sheets beside her, she realised she was all alone. Stephanie lifted her head from the white cotton pillow and pushing her hair back from her face, she looked towards the alarm clock. She was relieved to see they still had a couple of hours until they had to be at the airport. Yawning loudly, she swung her legs out of bed and grabbed her robe as she made her way down the stairs.

The rays of morning sunlight that peeked through the blinds as she walked along the hallway warmed her skin. She smiled at the sight that greeted her as she opened the kitchen door. Paul had obviously been working and was sprawled across the table, his head and arms resting on top of various pieces of paper. His soft blonde strands covered his face like a curtain. Stephanie pulled out the chair beside him and as she sat down, she tucked his hair behind his left ear. His long lashes rested against his cheek as he slept. He looked so peaceful and absolutely perfect to her. Everything about him was perfect and she was reluctant to disturb him, content to just watch him and admire him. But she knew she had no choice but to wake him up if they wanted to make their flight on time.

Smiling tenderly, Stephanie leant across and placed a soft kiss on his cheek. She called out his name as she gently shook his broad shoulder. Her only response was a discontented grunt before his head turned to face the other way. She shook his shoulder again, this time a little harder. As he muttered something unintelligible, she chuckled to herself. She had learned very quickly over the last few weeks that Paul most definitely wasn't a morning person. It usually took several attempts to wake him up but he had to get his ass in gear this morning otherwise they were going to be running late. She shook him again and this time his hand reached out to swat at her.

"Go away," he mumbled grumpily.

Stephanie laughed as she got up from the chair. She bent down and brushing his hair away from his face, she whispered in his ear. "Well that's a shame. And to think I only wanted to offer you my services in the shower, you know give you some help with those certain places."

She stepped back and laughed again as his head shot up from the table. Paul looked disorientated as he rubbed his eyes and yawned loudly, leaning back against the chair. A slow smile crept across his face as he came round to see Stephanie standing in front of him. His hand reached out towards her, his voice thick with sleep.

"Come here."

As Stephanie took his hand, he pulled her towards him and she wrapped her arms around his neck as she sat down on his knee. His face wore a gentle smile as he cupped her face with his hand.

"You're nothing but a tease McMahon."

She grinned as she rested her head against his. "Well, I had to wake you up and somehow I knew that would get your attention."

"Hmmm, you know me too well." he murmured into her mouth as their lips met in a slow, lingering kiss. As they broke apart, his arms moved down to slide around her waist. His eyes wore a gentle expression as he simply watched her.

Stephanie saw the tenderness in his deep brown pools and she was touched by his concern. She knew what was going through his mind but she had no regrets whatsoever about last night. She had felt any hesitation disappear the second they began to make love and it had meant so much to her. She also knew how much it meant to Paul too.

"I love you," she whispered. Her fingers ran through his soft, blonde hair as she kissed his forehead.

"And I love you too." Paul hushed stroking her cheek with the pad of his thumb.

"Good. Now how about we take this little mutual appreciation society of ours on the road. We need to get moving if we want to make our flight.."

Stephanie kissed the tip of his nose as she stood up, tightening the belt of her robe. She heard the heavy sigh as Paul gathered the pieces of paper together in a messy pile.

"Did you get everything done?" she asked him.

He nodded his head as he stood up, stretching his arms above his head. His t-shirt rode up his chiselled torso exposing the tanned strip of stomach and she absently licked her lips.

"I think so. I'll probably run through it once more while we're on the plane just to make sure."

"Well, if you want to take a shower, I'll make us some breakfast." she offered.

Paul grinned as he pulled Stephanie back into his arms. He had a mischievous glint in his incredible eyes. "I thought you were going to join me and take care of those hard to reach places."

"Maybe later. If I join you now, we'll never make it to the airport."

He smirked, winking at her. "I can make it quick."

"Honey, that's maybe something you don't want to brag about."

Paul scrunched his nose in contemplation. "Good point. I'll go and take that shower now before I tarnish my reputation even further."

Stephanie laughed as he walked away and allowing her eyes to linger until he had disappeared through the door, she began to make a start to breakfast. Humming a tune to herself, she realised was actually looking forward to their trip to New York and to spending some quality time with Paul. And maybe she might be able to persuade him to arrange a night out with Kevin and Melissa too. She missed her friend terribly and wanted to spend as much time as possible as she could with her.

Pouring herself a cup of coffee, Stephanie refused to let a single thought about another certain person enter her head. She didn't even want to think about the fact that he would be in the same city because at this point in time, she wasn't quite ready to deal with her estranged husband just yet. And while it was a confrontation she knew she couldn't put off forever, Stephanie was perfectly content to ignore their situation and maybe if she got really lucky or wished really hard enough, the whole thing with Shawn would just simply disappear…..

* * *

Stephanie let out a calming breath as the elevator doors opened and her fingers tugged on the bottom hem of her halter top. She was surprised to realise she was actually quite nervous about seeing her work colleagues again. Apart from Melissa and the odd phone call to her boss, she hadn't spoken to anyone else since she had lost the baby. They had been really thoughtful though sending her flowers and cards offering their condolences and best wishes and she had been so thankful for that. Their kind words had been a tiny ray of light in a really dark time.

As Stephanie stepped out into the corridor, she smiled despite her nervousness and saw it was business as usual. People were chattering and running around while the phones rang out incessantly. She put her head down trying to be discreet as she made her way towards her office but it was to no avail. As soon as she turned the corner, she heard someone call out her name.

"Stephanie! Is that you?"

Stephanie groaned inwardly but forced a smile as she turned round to see Dana, the office gossip. She lifted her hand in greeting and was soon surrounded by Dana and two other girls who she recognised but couldn't recall their names.

"You look really well Stephanie considering…well, you know."

She nodded and smiled uncomfortably. "Thanks."

"So is this you back full-time? We've really missed you around here, you know."

Stephanie had opened her mouth to reply when she felt someone tug on her arm and she was relieved to hear Melissa's voice behind her.

"Come on girls. The poor girl is just in the door. Leave her alone."

Dana threw Melissa a dirty look but backed off and walked down the corridor muttering away to her two friends. Stephanie smiled at her friend gratefully before pulling her into a hug.

"God Mel, it's so good to see you."

She stepped back and admired her friend. She grinned as she saw the telltale glow in her cheeks and the sparkle in her green eyes.

"So, getting some on a regular basis obviously agrees with you."

Melissa laughed as she playfully slapped Stephanie's arm. "Watch it you or else I'll call back Dana and her pack of vultures and let them continue to interrogate you."

Stephanie giggled as she began to walk along the corridor with Melissa. She ignored the peering eyes from behind the desks.

"So, on the subject of getting some, how are things going with Kevin?"

Melissa couldn't help the huge grin that appeared on her face at the mention of his name. "Wonderful. I mean, the guy is amazing."

She paused as her eyes twinkled at her friend.

"And you know the guy is like some Karma Sutra God. I never realised there were so many different positions."

Stephanie snorted and shook her head in playful disgust. "That's far too much information for my liking, Mel."

Just then, they reached the door to Stephanie's office. Melissa watched as her friend waited a beat before her hand reached for the door knob and it lingered there. Stephanie stood there frozen to the spot reluctant to enter and Melissa squeezed her shoulder reassuringly sensing what she had to be going through.

"You don't have to do this if you don't want to." she told her.

"It's okay. I'll be fine." Stephanie said.

Letting out a slow breath, she opened the door and her footsteps were tentative as she walked into her office. She hovered around the doorway and looked around. She saw that thankfully everything had been cleaned up and her desk was clear and tidy. She shivered slightly as she tried hard not to think about what had happened here just a few weeks ago. Her mind was screaming with memories she just wanted to forget. She looked towards Melissa and seeing her concerned expression, she offered her a small smile.

"This is more difficult than I thought." she admitted.

"Hey, it's understandable."

Melissa wrapped her arm around her shoulder and glanced down at her watch. "Listen, it's Friday, it's nearly three o'clock and Mark isn't around to catch me. How about we blow this joint and go for a drink instead? It will be my treat!"

Stephanie laughed in spite of herself. "Living dangerously, huh?"

"And why not? My best friend is back in town and that's as good a reason as any. What do you say?"

She smiled gratefully as she linked her arm through Melissa's suddenly desperate to get out of the office. "I say let's go."

As they closed the door behind them and walked arm in arm down the corridor, Stephanie couldn't help but feel relieved that they were leaving here. Honestly, she had thought she could handle this but she quite clearly wasn't as ready as she thought. She just needed to give herself a little more time. There was no need to rush anything. In the meantime, she would just enjoy spending time with her friend and besides she and Melissa had some serious catching up to do.

* * *

Kevin grabbed his phone as it rang out in the apartment silently praying it was Shawn. He had been waiting for him all day and so far, he had been a no show. He hadn't even called yet to tell him when he would be arriving but that was typical Shawn. Although knowing his friend's habits offered him little comfort when he was pacing around this place like a cat on a hot tin roof.

As Kevin answered the call, he tried to mask his disappointment when he heard Melissa's voice reply at the other end.

"Hey baby. What are you up to?" she asked.

He sighed as he flopped down onto the soft blue chair. "Nothing much. What about you?" He paused briefly as he heard the noise at the other end and his lips curved into a smirk of amusement. "Is that singing I can hear in the background?"

Melissa laughed crackled down the phone. "Yep. Steph seems to want to serenade everyone on the sidewalk."

"So, how much have you two had to drink exactly?"

"I'm not sure. I guess we lost count during Happy Hour. So you beautiful man, how would you like to join the party?"

Kevin sighed. He wished he could but he wanted to be here when Shawn returned. God knows he had a million and one things to say to the guy but the question was how he would explain his need to stay at home to Melissa? He tried to fob her off instead.

"I wouldn't want to cramp your style." he told her. "You and Steph just have some fun. I'll catch up with you tomorrow."

Melissa playfully clicked her teeth at him down the phone. "Sorry, but we won't take no for an answer. And if you don't show up, we'll send Paul round. He'll drag your sorry ass out to meet us."

"I didn't realise Paul was with you." said Kevin, surprised.

"He's not. Not yet anyway. Stephanie's just waiting for him to call when he's finished his meeting and then she's going to persuade him to join us too. So what do you say, handsome? Is it a date?"

Kevin pondered over his options. If he didn't go, then Paul would suspect something was up and the last thing he wanted was him coming anywhere near Shawn's apartment. He quickly decided that he would go. He could deal with Shawn when he came back; that's if Shawn was even here.

"It's a date." he agreed. "Where will I meet you?"

He smiled as he heard Melissa cheer down the phone.

"Hey Steph, Kev's coming."

He heard another cheer, this time from Stephanie.

"Tell Mr Million Positions to get his ass down here pronto."

Kevin chuckled and shook his head. Tonight looked as if it would be very interesting indeed especially with two drunken women on their hands. God help him and Paul when they got there.

* * *

Paul's eyes scanned the busy bar for Stephanie. He was desperate to see her and was looking forward to a nice, cold beer and a good time. He needed it after the afternoon he had just had. His client had been one major pain in the ass and had basically issued him with an ultimatum. He had to produce brand new plans by the end of next week or the business would go elsewhere. Due to his arrogant attitude, Paul had been tempted to tell him to shove it where the sun didn't shine but he had managed to bite his tongue. Instead he had smiled politely and told him it wouldn't be a problem. He knew he had his reputation to think of and not only that, the deal offered him good money which he would be a fool to turn down.

Just then, he felt a pair of hands cover his eyes from behind. They were warm and soft and her familiar perfume gave the game away as she reached up and whispered in his ear.

"Guess who?"

He smiled and decided to play along anyway.

"Hmmm, Angelina Jolie?"

"Wrong. Guess again?"

"Halle Berry?"

"Nope. One more strike and you're out."

"Well in that case, it must be my extremely gorgeous girlfriend."

He turned round to see Stephanie grinning at him but the first thing he noticed was her huge, glazed blue eyes. He chuckled and shook his head as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"Make that my extremely drunk, gorgeous girlfriend." he joked.

Stephanie gave him a kiss before stepping back and smiling at him. Her fingers played with the collar of his white shirt. "So, you think I'm gorgeous, huh?"

Paul smiled and nodded as he clasped her hands in his. "Not that you deserve to hear such things seeing you got drunk without me but yes I do."

His hand reached up, brushing a stray hair from her face. As his lips connected with hers, he heard the shout from across the room.

"For God sakes, Levesque, put her down and come and grab a beer."

Paul shook his head and laughed as they broke apart. Hand in hand, he walked with Stephanie across to the table where Kevin and Melissa sat. He gratefully accepted the bottle of beer that his friend held out to him and smiled as he watched Melissa snuggle into his large chest. Paul winked at Stephanie who sat beside him.

"You were right, babe. They do make an adorable couple."

He burst out laughing as Kevin flipped him the finger and looked round as he felt Stephanie tugging on arm to get his attention.

"Apparently he's extremely talented in bed. Mel says he knows loads of positions."

Paul's nose wrinkled with disgust as he digested that piece of information.

"Steph, please! I haven't even eaten yet and already I've lost my appetite."

"What's wrong Levesque? Are you jealous?"

He grinned as he shook his head at Kevin. However, Stephanie interrupted before he had a chance to answer. She sat down balancing herself on Paul's knee and holding her drink in one hand, she wrapped her free arm around his thick neck.

"I'll have you know that Paul has absolutely no reason to be jealous of any man." she said confidently as she waved her beer bottle in Kevin's direction. She then turned to face Paul and grinned at him, her tongue poking out between her teeth.

"No reason whatsoever. My man is an absolute stud between the sheets."

A few heads turned to stare in their direction as Stephanie's raised voice carried across towards them. Paul dropped his head, ignoring them and instead smiled at the woman sitting in his lap.

"Thanks baby but please, feel free to keep that kind of information to yourself in the future."

Stephanie nodded in agreement as she rose to her feet, albeit a little unsteadily. She held out a hand towards Paul.

"I love this song. Will you dance with me?"

He grimaced and shook his head. "Steph, I don't do dancing."

Stephanie snorted. "Of course you do. Everybody dances. Come on Paul. Please? For me?"

As she looked at him with her wide eyes and pouting lips, Paul knew he was a goner. He reluctantly placed his beer on the table and couldn't help but smile as Stephanie dragged him out onto the dance floor.

Melissa stood up and smiled at Kevin. "I'm going to the bathroom. I'll be back in a second."

Kevin smiled and watched her as she walked away, admiring her legs in her short, black skirt. However, his attention was soon diverted to his phone which lit up as it sat upon the table. As he looked down to see Shawn's name on the caller display, he breathed a sigh of relief that Paul or Stephanie weren't around to see it. He quickly grabbed his phone and made his way towards the exit. He was totally unaware that Paul was watching him as he left.

Stephanie saw he was distracted and that his face wore a frown as he watched the bar entrance. She stopped dancing and curled her hands around Paul's face grabbing his attention. As their eyes met, she smiled at him seductively before pressing her lips against his.

It was all he needed. Paul shut out all the people around them and forgot all about his friend as he felt himself get lost in her kiss. Her lips felt hot and soft as they moved slowly and languidly against his. In fact there was no urgency in the kiss whatsoever. It was like they had all the time in the world and Paul liked to believe that they did because God help him he was head over heels for this woman and he wanted to be with her forever.

Just then the music changed and Stephanie broke the kiss, wrapping her arms around his neck. She smiled at him as her body began to sway in time to the beat and Paul wrapped his arms around her, pressing her closely against him. His heart raced in his chest as he felt the heat of her skin through the flimsy material of her dress. His eyes closed as he felt Stephanie's breath against his ear, her whispers of love making his body tingle and his stomach pool with his desire for her.

Melissa smiled as she watched her friends on the dance floor. She felt so happy for them, especially Stephanie. She had been through so much lately with Shawn and the baby. Hopefully now, she would find peace and love in her new life with Paul.

She was so wrapped up in watching them that she failed to see Kevin return from outside. He only caught her attention when he sat down beside her. She gave him a smile as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder.

"Where did you get to?" she asked him curiously.

Kevin smiled as he placed his phone back in his jacket pocket. "It was a call from Bill at work." he lied not wanting her to know it had been Shawn. Unfortunately his had rung off before he could answer but he had called back leaving Shawn a message and warning him about Paul. He didn't know what else to do. He felt like he was caught between a rock and a hard place.

"There were a couple of problems with deliveries but I got them sorted." he embellished.

Melissa smiled as she turned back round to watch Paul and Stephanie. She tried hard not to think about Kevin returning to Miami. It had only been a few weeks but she had gotten used to having him around. In fact, she was pretty certain she was developing genuine feelings for him. Kevin would be the first guy in a long time that she actually cared about. She had floated from relationship to relationship always looking for the man she could find herself settling down with. But now that she'd found him, it looked like it could be over before it had a chance to begin.

Shaking her head lightly, she decided not to dwell on it. She would enjoy the time they had together and worry about it later. After all, he hadn't mentioned going back to Miami any time soon. And with any luck, he just might not be.

Stephanie grinned at her friend as she led Paul back to the table. "So, does anyone fancy something to eat? I'm starving."

She turned round to him and winked at him.

"All that dancing has given me an appetite."

Paul grinned as he pulled her back towards him. "You can say that again. I'm thinking of skipping the main course and going straight for the dessert."

Stephanie giggled as he leant her back in his arms and began to place soft kisses on her neck.

Kevin stood up and Melissa quickly followed. He smiled at her as he helped her on with her jacket.

"So, where's the best place to eat around here?"

Melissa shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. Wherever we can get in, I guess. There's not a lot of places round here that you don't have to book to get in on a Friday night." She grabbed her bag from the table and she smiled at Paul and Stephanie. "Unless you guys want to come back to mine and get some takeaway? There's great Chinese food in that place around the corner."

Stephanie nodded her head and turned to smile at Paul. "What do you think? Mel's apartment is only a few blocks from the hotel."

Paul nodded his head. "Anywhere is fine by me as long as we can pick up some beer along the way."

Melissa smiled and nodded her head. "That's sorted then. Let's go."

The four of them walked out the bar and along the street. Kevin ignored his phone which continued to vibrate silently in his pocket.

* * *

The movie finished and shifting in his seat, Paul yawned and looked across at the sofa. Kevin and Melissa had their arms wrapped around one another and were fast asleep and they weren't the only ones. Stephanie also had her eyes closed beside him as her head leant against his shoulder. He smiled gently as he brushed back her hair and swore she looked like an angel as she slept, the same angel who he had to somehow try and get back to the hotel.

As Paul lifted his wrist and glanced at his watch, he groaned seeing it was after two. It was definitely time to leave, especially when he had a meeting set up for ten o'clock the next morning. He gently removed Stephanie's head from his shoulder, carefully placing it down on the cushion and stood up looking around the living room for his jacket. He needed his phone to call a cab and it was in the pocket. He then remembered Melissa taking their jackets and placing them in her bedroom.

Tiptoeing out of the room and along the hall, Paul opened the door and switched on the light. He smiled as he spotted his jacket lying across the bed. As he got closer, he could hear a vibrating noise and soon realised it was coming from Kevin's leather coat. Paul reached into his pocket to retrieve it. He guessed it must be important for someone to be calling him at this hour and maybe he'd better check just in case it was problem at work and he had to wake up Kev.

As Paul lifted the phone and looked at it, he saw Shawn's name scroll across the screen. His top lip curled into an angry snarl and the blood beat in his ears as his finger jabbed at the button and he answered the call. He slowly brought the phone up to his ear and his stomach churned as he listened to the voice at the other end.

"Kev, where the hell are you, man? I'm back at the apartment now. I've been calling you for hours."

Without saying a word, Paul hung up the phone and threw it down on the bed. His face was like stone as he pulled on his jacket, flicking his hair over the collar. But while he was void of emotion on the outside, on the inside it was a different story. His whole body was trembling with his anger at the thought of the man who hurt Stephanie and the man who he held responsible for killing his unborn child. And now Shawn was back in New York which meant he had a score to settle.

Without looking back, Paul walked out of the bedroom and the apartment while everyone else slept on, blissfully unaware that he had left to find Shawn…


	26. Chapter 26

Thanks again for all your reviews guys! It really means a lot to us writers! Hope you enjoy the next installment :) :)

* * *

Chapter 26

"Shawn, open the fucking door. Now!"

Paul's fist was clenched as he pounded against the hard wood. He knew Shawn was definitely inside. There was crack of light spilling from the bottom of the doorway across the landing and he swore he had heard the faint sound of the television just a moment ago. The bastard was just too scared to come out and face him and face up to what he had done.

Paul felt himself getting angrier with every second that passed and he started to pace the floor as he waited impatiently for Shawn. His nostrils were flared with his heavy and controlled breathing and his brown eyes were almost black and filled with rage. He noticed a light come on in one of the apartments across the hallway but he paid it no attention. If the people behind it had any sense, they'd stay well out of this. It was none of their concern especially if they didn't want a mouthful of abuse for their trouble.

Paul turned to face the door again raking his fingers through his hair and feeling his rage begin to overwhelm him as he realised Shawn was ignoring him. It was becoming obvious he wasn't going to get a reply but what Shawn didn't realise was he wasn't going to leave until he got one. He had waited far too long already to confront him about this and he wasn't going anywhere until he did.

Paul pounded against the door again and this time the laminated wood literally shook with the force of his blows. "Open this door now or I swear to God Shawn, I'll fucking break it down." he shouted.

He waited a few seconds and hearing no movement on the other side, he stepped back and lifted his foot. He directed it just below the door handle and the wood cracked as the sole of his boot connected. He was contemplating kicking it for a second time when he heard the click of the lock. However, after a few seconds the door still remained closed and with his patience already worn extremely thin, Paul didn't wait to be invited in. He pushed open the door and walked into the apartment.

He quickly glanced round, searching for Shawn. Within seconds their eyes locked across the room and he immediately tensed. His fists were clenched so tightly he could feel the nails digging into his skin. His stomach was in knots as he looked at the man who had hurt Stephanie and the guy who he held responsible for the loss of his baby. It was a baby he'd never have to chance to see grow up. He'd never hear them cry. He'd never get to hold them in his arms. Paul's breathing was heavy and slow as he started to walk slowly and deliberately towards the sofa where Shawn was sitting down.

"Get up." he snapped coldly.

Shawn's face was tentative as he slowly got to his feet but not for long. He fell back against the cushions as Paul's fist connected with his face. Stunned, he shook his head and lifted the back of his hand to wipe his mouth where he could taste the metallic red of his blood. He hardly had time to recover when Paul picked him up by his shirt and with almost brute force, he carried him across to pin him against the wall. His top lip was curled in a snarl and his face filled with fury.

"You fucking bastard. Do you know what you've done?"

Shawn slowly nodded his head. "I'm sorry, Paul."

Paul snorted with disgust as his brown eyes stared back at him hatefully. "You're sorry? You're fucking sorry?"

He lifted him up and as he pushed him back, Shawn's head connected off the wall. Paul threw a punch which connected with his gut and his second shot hit off his chin, sending Shawn crashing to the floor. Paul bent down and hauled him up before pinning him to the wall again.

"How dare you, you sanctimonious son of a bitch! You think an apology can fix what you've done?"

Shawn sneered back at him as the pain radiated throughout his face. His calm façade was quickly beginning to slip and the anger he still felt towards Paul overpowered the remorse he genuinely felt for what he had done.

"It's more than you deserve!" he shot back.

Paul couldn't contain his rage and a red mist descended on him as he punched Shawn in the gut once more and as he was bent over, he walked across towards him, his face red with anger.

"Steph lost the baby because of you. Do you have any idea of the pain and the hurt that you've caused for her? For both of us?"

Shawn spat the blood from his mouth onto the wooden floor. "You screwed my wife. Do you have any idea of the pain you've caused me?"

Paul's brown eyes went wide unable to believe his ears. He couldn't believe Shawn was actually trying to justify what he had done. Filled with every ounce of rage and pain he had kept bottled up inside, he rushed towards Shawn throwing himself on top of him….

* * *

In another part of the city, Stephanie was yawning and opening her eyes. Her mouth felt extremely dry and she licked her lips as she pushed herself up off the sofa. Her vision was still blurry as she looked around the room realising someone was missing. Paul wasn't there. Rubbing her eyes, she made her way out into the hallway and softly called out his name.

"Paul, are you there?"

She frowned as she saw the open bathroom door in the dark shadows and she made her way towards Melissa's bedroom. The light was on and as she pushed open the door to walk in the room, she saw the strewn jackets on the bed. It didn't take her long to notice Paul's leather coat was missing. Her brow crinkling in confusion, Stephanie scratched her head and wandered back towards the living room. Her mind was starting to work overtime. Where the hell had Paul gone? He couldn't have gone back to the hotel because he wouldn't have left her here. He would have woken her and taken her with him. Maybe he'd gone to get more beer or maybe he'd just needed some fresh air.

As Stephanie entered the silent sitting room, she peered at the clock on Melissa's mantelpiece. She became even more confused when she noticed it was two thirty in the morning. Surely Paul wouldn't have gone anywhere at this time of night.

She looked across at the sofa where Kevin slept and decided to wake him. She was becoming worried and maybe there was a chance he knew where Paul was. Maybe he had even still been awake when he had left. She was sure she had fallen asleep way before the rest of them.

Stephanie bent down in front of Kevin and started to shake his shoulder. "Kevin, wake up."

She heard him let out a soft moan and she shook him again. She sighed with relief as she saw his eyes open to peer at her. Kevin was thankfully a hell of a lot easier to wake up than Paul was. She smiled at him apologetically as he rubbed his eyes.

"Where did Paul go?" she asked him softly.

Kevin furrowed his brow as he looked at her in confusion. "What do you mean, where did Paul go? The last time I saw him he was sleeping beside you."

"Well not any more. I've just woken up and he's nowhere to be found. His jacket is gone too."

Kevin literally jumped up off the sofa causing Stephanie to step back in surprise and Melissa to wake up. Without saying a word, he headed towards the bedroom. His stomach was in knots all the way there. He just prayed to God he was over reacting and worrying over nothing but fuck! Why had he fallen asleep? Sure, Paul had been out cold and he wasn't going anywhere. But of course, that turned out to be wrong. Paul had gone somewhere and he had a horrible feeling in his gut that he knew where he had gone.

As Kevin walked into the room, the knots in his stomach twisted even further and he cursed when he saw his phone lying on the bed. He picked it up and quickly checked his caller display. He saw the last number and he closed his eyes as he saw Shawn's name.

"Damn it, Paul." he scowled.

The blood was beating in his ears as Kevin grabbed his coat. He quickly pulled it on only to be met at the doorway by Stephanie and Melissa. Stephanie's blue eyes narrowed in his direction when she saw he was about to leave too.

"Kevin, where are you going? Where's Paul?"

Kevin tried to smile as he touched her shoulder. "Look, there's no need to worry. I'm just going to check somewhere out and see if he's there."

She snorted in disbelief as she lifted her hand to remove it from her shoulder. "Don't lie to me Kevin. You know where he's gone."

She saw the telling flicker across his jaw before Kevin lowered his head and suddenly she realised the answer. She felt sick to the stomach as she pushed past him to grab her coat.

"Stephanie, what are you doing? You should stay here with Melissa."

Stephanie whirled round as she threw on her wool jacket. "I'm not staying anywhere. I'm coming with you. I have to stop him."

Melissa looked between the two of them, confusion clearly etched on her face. "Stop him from doing what? Where is he?"

Stephanie sighed as she flicked her hair from her collar. "He's gone to see Shawn"

Melissa quickly looked round towards Kevin. "Is Shawn back? You didn't tell me."

Kevin shrugged his shoulders. "He was due back tonight. I haven't seen him. Hell, I don't even know if he is back yet."

He sighed as he watched her retrieve the last coat from the bed.

"Mel, what are you doing?" he asked her.

"I'm coming with you." She looked between them as they stared at her. "Well, there's no way I'm letting you go without me. Come on."

She made her way out into the hallway with Stephanie and Kevin quickly following on behind both of them silent and their faces etched with worry as they tried desperately not to think about the implications of where Paul was and what he may have done…..

* * *

"I never meant for it to happen, you know." said Shawn.

His breathing was laboured as he rested his back against the wall. His fingers lifted to wipe at his bottom lip where the blood trickled towards his chin. Paul was slowly walking towards him, his arm wrapped protectively against his ribs.

"You fucking threw her against a desk! What did you expect to happen?" he shot back, his dark, angry eyes glaring back at him. He could still feel his body tense with aggression as he stood toe to toe beside him.

"You know, you disgust me."

Paul paused as he let out a calming breath, his fist clenched by his side trying to control the urge to smack Shawn in the face once more. They were both sore and beaten but this wasn't over, not by a long shot. Shawn was going to pay for what he had done and he was going to realise just what a lowlife piece of crap he was.

"How could you put your hands on her?" he asked, shaking his head. "You knew she was carrying our child."

"But it could have been my child." Shawn sneered back at him. "She would never have known if you had left well alone. But, oh no! You couldn't get a woman of your own so you had to go after mine. Stephanie was my life, you bastard!" he screamed, the tears burning the back of his eyes.

"My wife and that baby meant everything to me. They were going to be my family."

Paul's expression was cold and hard as he moved his face closer. "So because you couldn't have the family you wanted, you decided we couldn't either, huh?"

Unable to contain his rage any longer, he punched Shawn in the gut again. He pushed him back into the wall, his hands pressing into his shoulders pinning him there.

"I fucking hate you for what you've done." he told him. "Because of you, I'll never get to know my son or daughter. I'll never have the chance to watch them grow up and see them have children of their own."

"Well, now you know how it feels, Levesque." Shawn spat back. "And one day, I hope you know what it will feel like to lose Stephanie too. The one woman you love with all of your heart. And you will, mark my words. She'll find someone else once she's finished with you. Once a slut, always a slut!"

Paul growled in anger as he pushed Shawn, throwing him down to the floor. As he went to lunge at him with his fist, Shawn stuck out his foot catching his leg. He stumbled forward, caught off balance and his head cracked off the corner of the wall. Paul immediately placed his head in his hands feeling the excruciating pain. He could see flashes of light in front of his eyes. He could also feel the blood as it poured from the wound. He'd obviously busted himself open and Paul felt slightly off balance as he pushed himself off the wall and lifted his head once more.

"Had enough, Paulie?"

He snarled as he glared at Shawn, wiping the blood from his eyes. He couldn't contain his anger as he realised the bastard was taunting him. Paul immediately launched himself in his direction and tackled him to the floor.

He and Shawn were so wrapped up in exchanging punches, practically wrestling on the floor that they failed to hear the footsteps rushing towards them.

"Holy shit!"

Kevin was frozen in shock for a second as he stopped in his tracks, witnessing the bloody mess of his friends. However, he quickly came round as he heard Stephanie's frantic shouts from behind him.

"Kevin, don't just stand there. Stop them for God sakes. They're going to kill one another!"

He immediately rushed over just as Shawn rolled on top of Paul. He literally dragged him off and holding him, he tried to pull him over to the other side of the room.

Paul was glaring back at them, trying to push himself to his feet but his legs felt like jelly and he collapsed back down to the floor, his back slumped against the wall.

As he sat there, his head spinning, Stephanie rushed over to him letting out a cry as she saw the mess he was in. His face was covered in blood and the cut on his head seemed pretty deep. She turned to Melissa who was watching Kevin try to control Shawn and take him through to another room.

"Mel, would you go to the kitchen and get me a towel."

Melissa's face was stunned as she slowly turned to Stephanie and nodded.

"And run it under some water for me?"

She nodded once more and headed towards the kitchen.

Stephanie tried not to panic as she examined Paul once more but she was alarmed to see that his eyes appeared glazed as he tried to focus on her.

"Paul, are you okay? What the hell happened to you?" she asked, concerned.

She watched him blink heavily a few times as he licked his lips.

"I think…. I think I hit my head off the wall."

Stephanie sniffed blinking back the tears that had sprung to her eyes. She was pretty sure Paul was concussed and although she had no clue how bad it was, she knew she needed to get him to a hospital.

Ignoring the blood that covered part of his face in a crimson mask, she tenderly removed his hair from his wet cheek, brushing it behind his ears.

Melissa soon appeared by her side with a towel and a basin of water and Stephanie smiled at her gratefully. Her hands lightly soaked the towel before lifting it to gently dab at Paul's forehead. She smiled at him as she took care of him. However, his attention quickly turned elsewhere as Kevin walked back into the room.

"Where the fuck is he?" snarled Paul angrily.

"In the bathroom." he sighed. "I told him to get cleaned up."

"It's not finished, you know."

Kevin looked at his friend and shook his head in disbelief. "Paul, look at the pair of you. Neither one of you can stand up never mind anything else."

Paul pressed his lips together tightly but continued to glare at him. Although deep down, he knew Kevin was right. Now that the adrenaline was gone, the pain and fatigue were starting to kick in. Still, it didn't stop him from feeling angry. Angry at Shawn and also angry at his supposed friend.

"So, how long were you planning on lying to me?" he finally asked.

Kevin sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair. He could hear the anger in Paul's voice and he expected it. And quite honestly, he knew he deserved it. "I just thought it was for the best and looking at the pair of you now, I can see I was right."

Paul pushed away Stephanie's hand and ignoring her protests, he pulled himself to his feet. He grimaced in pain and his head spun dizzily as he stood up. His legs were lightly shaking too but he remained upright by leaning his back against the wall.

"You know I asked you Kev. I asked you umpteen times if you'd heard from Shawn and every time, you told me no. You must think I'm some kind of fucking idiot by lying to me over and over again."

"Paul, I just did what I thought was best."

"Well, do you know what's best for me?" he retorted taking a second to catch his breath. "What's best for me is for you and that bastard through there to stay away from me. I want nothing more to do with either of you."

Before Kevin could even respond to that, Shawn appeared from the bathroom. He had obviously decided not to take Kevin's advice as he sauntered into the living room.

"And that suits me just fine Paulie because I want nothing to do with you either."

Paul snarled at Shawn as he pushed himself off the wall. But he felt Stephanie grab his arm to pull him back.

"No, Paul. He's not worth it."

Shawn sneered as he walked towards them. "Listen to the lady, Levesque. For once, she knows what she's talking about."

Stephanie swallowed hard as she gazed to the floor, her scared blue eyes avoiding looking at her ex-husband. The memories of his visit to her office were flooding her mind, overwhelming her. She just wanted to get away from him and out of this apartment. It was all too much and it was starting to unnerve her. She desperately tugged on Paul's arm to get his attention away from Shawn.

"Please, Paul. Let's just get out of here."

"What's wrong? Don't you want to spend time with your husband, Steph?" snickered Shawn.

"Shut the fuck up!" warned Kevin, glaring at his friend before turning back towards Paul. His face was slowly becoming covered in blood again. He was obviously busted open badly and needed stitches. Kevin's brow furrowed in concern.

"Paul, I think you should get to a hospital."

Paul sneered back at him as he took hold of Stephanie's hand. He blinked hard as he tried to focus. "Stick your concern up your ass, Kev. I don't need it."

"Now, now, Paul. That's no way to treat your friends. Speaking of friends, you'd better watch out Kev. He'll be after Melissa next."

Paul went to rush towards Shawn but was stopped in his tracks by Stephanie who deliberately stood in front of him, her hand pressed firmly against his chest. Her glossy blue eyes were wide as they pleaded with him.

"Please Paul. Get me out of here." she whispered as she felt a tear slowly trickle down her cheek.

Paul immediately sensed her distress and squeezing her hand, he nodded his head. Shawn would keep. Stephanie was the most important thing to him right now. As they made their way towards the apartment door, he wrapped one arm round her neck trying his best not to hurt her as he leant against her for support.

Melissa watched them for a moment before turning towards Kevin. "I'll go with them." She stood on her tip toes and kissed his cheek. "I'll call you and let you know how he is."

Kevin smiled at her gratefully and watched as she followed them out the door until it softly clicked shut behind them.

"So, you've shacked up with the beautiful Melissa."

Kevin shook his head. "Shut up Shawn. And go and clean yourself up. You look a fucking mess."

Shawn stared at his friend. "What the hell is your problem, Kev?"

"You. You're my fucking problem Shawn. I was so worried about saving your ass that I've now jeopardised my friendship with Paul."

"Well it's no great loss if you ask me."

"But it is to me." Kevin let out a sigh as he ran his fingers through his hair. "Have you no remorse for what you've done? Don't you realise what you've put Paul and Stephanie through?"

"Of course I fucking do."

But Shawn's bravado suddenly slipped as he sighed as he sat down on the arm of the sofa. He lifted his shoulder in a dejected shrug. "You know when I went to her office that day, I asked Stephanie to come back. I wanted us to try and be a family. I was willing to bring up that child as my own. Do you really think I meant to do what I did to her?"

Kevin sighed as he slowly shook his head. "But she's with Paul now, Shawn. You have to try and accept that and move on."

"The fuck I do."

Shawn pushed himself off the sofa and his expression was determined as he glared back.

"As far as I'm concerned, he's taken what's mine. I'm going to do everything I can to get Stephanie back."

Kevin watched in disbelief as Shawn left the room and headed to the bathroom. He couldn't believe what had just come out of his friend's mouth. Surely he honestly didn't think that he could click his fingers and Stephanie would go running back to him? It wasn't going to happen, especially not now, not with the way she felt about Paul.

Kevin stood up and sighed as his thoughts turned to what Paul had said to him earlier. He had to admit it bothered him and he prayed he hadn't meant it. God only knows what he would do if he didn't have his friendship in his life anymore. It just didn't bear thinking about. He just had to pray that once he had calmed down, Paul would realise that he had done what he thought was best. He was just the guy who had been looking out for his best friends.

* * *

Stephanie smiled at Melissa and gratefully accepted the cup of coffee handed to her. As her hands curled around the warm Styrofoam, she pondered over how quickly she'd sobered up tonight and so much so she could even feel a headache coming on. She didn't know if it was the alcohol or the stress of being in this place again. God knows she'd had her fair share of hospitals recently and she would be happy if she never set foot in another one again.

Taking a sip of her drink, Stephanie looked up at the clock in the waiting room. They had been here for over an hour and as yet, they were still waiting to see Paul. The doctor had confirmed a concussion before whisking him away to stitch up his head. They still didn't know if Paul was being admitted or not. She guessed they would make that decision once they'd properly assessed his condition.

"Do you think he meant it?"

Stephanie heard Melissa's question and turned her head towards her. She noticed she looked almost contemplative as she stared straight ahead holding her coffee cup. "Did who mean what?" she asked her.

"Paul."

Melissa sighed before turning and smiling tightly. However, it didn't disguise the concern in her eyes.

"Do you think he meant what he said about wanting nothing more to do with Kevin?"

Stephanie shrugged her shoulders as she blew on her coffee to cool it down.

"I don't know but I sure hope not. I know his friendship means a lot to Paul and I don't want him to throw it away. Not when he's lost Shawn already."

She slumped forward and closed her eyes as she felt that familiar pang in her chest. She tried not to let herself go on another guilt trip about Paul and Shawn's friendship. Paul had spent the better part of the last month telling her she had nothing to feel guilty about. He would no doubt be upset if he thought she was blaming herself again but sometimes it was hard not to especially after what she had witnessed tonight.

Just then she heard voices and she looked up to see Paul and the doctor walking towards them. She stood up and placed her coffee cup on the small table next to her. Paul was visibly limping and as well as the stitches in his forehead, his right cheek looked bruised. He was a mess. God only knows how he'd make his meeting in less than five hours. However, despite his injuries, he still managed a smile as he walked to stand in front of her.

"The doctor will release me but only if you promise to be my personal nurse."

The doctor smiled and shook his head in amusement. "I just need you to look after Mr Levesque. Fortunately, his concussion isn't too serious and most of the effects like the blurred vision and wobbly legs seem to have worn off. But he's not completely out of the woods yet. He needs to take it easy over the next couple of days."

Paul winked at Stephanie. "Complete bed rest for forty eight hours. Think you can handle it, baby.

Stephanie laughed and managed a smile for the doctor despite her concern. "I'll make sure he's well looked after. Thank you."

Paul held out his hand which the doctor shook. "Yeah, thanks Doc. I appreciate it."

The doctor smiled back but looked at him sternly. "Just remember what I said, Mr Levesque."

As he walked away, Stephanie immediately glanced at Paul concerned. "What did he mean by that? What did he say to you?"

He lifted his shoulder in a shrug. "He wanted to keep me in but I didn't want to. He just warned me about taking it easy that's all."

"Paul! You should have done what the doctor told you. You should have let them admit you."

Paul shook his head as he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. "I didn't want you hanging around this place any longer and besides, I've paid good money for our suite at the hotel. I plan on taking advantage of it."

Melissa reached out and touched his arm. "I'm glad you're okay, Paul. Kevin will be relieved."

Her eyes widened, stunned as she saw Paul snarl almost venomously at the mention of his name.

"No offence Mel but right now, I couldn't care less whether Kevin is relieved or not."

Stephanie sighed. "Paul…"

He placed his finger on her lips to stop her. "I don't want to hear it, Steph. As far as I'm concerned, Kev can go to hell. Now, can we get out of here before the doctor changes his mind?"

Stephanie looked at Melissa solemnly as they made their way along the corridor and towards the entrance. She couldn't help but feel that Paul was making a huge mistake with regards to his friendship with Kevin. He was letting his anger rule his head and he needed to calm down before making any rash decisions. He just hoped Kevin kept his distance in the meantime. The last thing they needed or wanted was any more bloodshed between friends.


	27. Chapter 27

Thanks again for all your wonderful comments. This story is coming to an end soon and I hope you've enjoyed the ride :)

* * *

Chapter 27

Stephanie sat down gently on the edge of the bed, the mattress lightly creaking underneath her weight as she shifted closer to Paul, watching him sleep. Her blue eyes were tender as she lifted her hand up to brush back his soft, blonde hair from his face. He looked so peaceful lying there and reminded her somewhat of an innocent boy but his slumber only hid the torment she knew he felt inside. Paul had tossed and turned beside her for the better part of the night only managing to fall asleep as the first rays of daylight broke through the curtains, filtering into the room. Sensing the turmoil raging on his head, she had tried on a few occasions to get him to talk to her as they lay in each other's arms. But each time she had broached the subject of tonight or Kevin, he had told her he didn't want to discuss it and she knew not to push the issue. She had learned from experience that Paul would talk about things only when he was good and ready and not a minute before then

Sighing softly, Stephanie brought her hand down and her thumb lightly traced the purple bruising across his cheekbone. It was a stark contrast to the paleness of his skin and she frowned worriedly as she remembered the events from the previous night. She was just so grateful they had arrived at the apartment when they did. Paul and Shawn had quite literally beaten one another senseless. God knows what could have happened to either one of them if they hadn't been interrupted. And if something had happened, she would never have been able to forgive herself for it. The truth was she knew she was more or less to blame for the entire mess. If she had just been honest with herself and everyone else from the beginning then none of this would be happening in the first place. Of course Paul would be livid if he knew she was even thinking like this. But she couldn't help it. Not when she knew in her heart this was all her fault.

Just then Paul stirred beside her and his lips slightly parted as he let out a low moan. His brow furrowed as he slowly opened his eyes and blinking, he let them adjust to the light. A smile crept across his face when he moved his head and realised Stephanie was sitting next to him.

"Morning, gorgeous." he said thickly.

Paul's face flickered as he grimaced with the pain of pushing himself up against the pillows. His body was sore and stiff and his head was literally throbbing with the pounding but he was determined not to let Stephanie see just how badly he was hurting. God knows she was worried about him as it was. He didn't want to worry her even further. Covering her hand with his as it rested on the crisp sheets, he smiled wearily at her.

"What time is it?" he asked

Stephanie shifted her body even closer to him letting her leg lean against him. "It's almost nine o'clock."

Paul groaned loudly as he used his free hand to rub at his eyes. He shook his head as he pushed his blonde hair back from his face, pressing his lips together in a small smile. "I'd better think about getting up or I'm going to miss my meeting."

Stephanie's blue eyes instantly went wide with her alarm. "Surely you're not still going. Paul, you're a mess."

"Gee, thanks." he joked. "I know I don't look my best in the morning but there's no need to be so harsh, Steph."

She ignored his playful tone and looked at him sternly. "You know what I mean. You can't go to a meeting with cuts and bruises all over your face. Not to mention the fact that you're still concussed."

Her face visibly softened as she reached out to touch his face tenderly.

"You really don't look so good honey."

Paul sighed as he looked down at their joined hands on the sheets. He knew Stephanie made a good point. It would be extremely unprofessional to turn up to a meeting with one of his biggest clients looking like he'd gone ten rounds with Tyson. But he had no choice. This guy was threatening to pull out as it was. A no-show from him today and he could wave goodbye to a small fortune not to mention what it could do to his reputation. His thumb traced Stephanie's hand as he glanced back up towards her. He could see the concerned expression in her blue eyes as she watched him and he was touched. He licked his lips as he lifted his shoulder in an apologetic shrug.

"I have to do this, Steph." he told her. "If I don't, the guy will do everything he can to try and ruin me. I know how he works. He's a ruthless bastard."

He reached out, sitting slightly forward as he brushed her hair behind her ear and trying his best to disguise the fact that even that simple act made his body ache.

"I'll just pretend I got jumped by a gang and mugged or something. Who knows? Maybe the guy will take pity on me then." Paul smiled raising his eyebrows hopefully.

"Then I want to come with you."

His brow quickly wrinkled with his confusion. "Why?"

Stephanie moved even closer crumpling the sheets as she wrapped her arms around his neck. Her fingers toyed with the strands of his hair. "Because I want to make sure you're okay. I don't want you going on your own. Not with a concussion."

She smiled as her hand moved to curl around his face, her thumb tracing his cheek.

"I'll wait outside until you're done. Just please, let me come with you."

Paul saw the pleading look in her eyes and he slowly nodded his head. He felt his heart skip a beat as she smiled widely at him. Honestly, he was actually quite glad Stephanie was insisting she came with him. He definitely wasn't feeling the best and even sitting in bed, he felt quite dizzy. The room was spinning. He dreaded what he would feel like once he actually summoned the strength to get up.

"You'd better get a move on and get in the shower. I'll order us some breakfast while you're in there."

Paul winked back at her. "Maybe you could join me and I could have you for breakfast instead."

"Get your mind out of the gutter, Levesque. We don't have time for that." Stephanie smiled as her body tingled with even the simple implication of his suggestion. It was amazing how easily he got to her. One kiss or one whisper and she found herself practically melting into his arms.

But Stephanie's desire quickly turned to concern once more when saw Paul wince in pain as he shifted his body against the mattress. She leant across and placed a soft kiss on his warm lips.

"But maybe afterwards I could join you in a nice, hot bath. See if we can't ease a stiff muscle or two."

Paul chuckled. "Now who's the one with their mind in the gutter, huh?"

She smiled back innocently batting her eyelashes. "Why, whatever do you mean?"

Reluctantly releasing him, Stephanie stood up from the bed, pulling back the covers.

"Come on. It's time to rise and shine, honey."

Paul inhaled sharply as he swung his legs over the edge of the bed and felt the sharp pain in his ribs. They were no doubt another casualty of last night. As he placed his hands on the bed to push himself up, he saw Stephanie's outstretched hand in front of him. He smiled as he accepted it gratefully and she helped him up from the bed. He closed his eyes briefly as the room began to spin.

"Paul, are you okay?"

As he opened his eyes to look at her, he was relieved to find the room was now still. He gave her a reassuring smile. "I'm fine babe."

He kissed the top of her hair as he made his way towards the bathroom.

"I'll order breakfast, shall I?"

"Sure." he replied lifting his hand in acknowledgment as he closed the door behind him.

He didn't notice Stephanie's frown as she made her way towards the phone on the nightstand. Paul looked absolutely terrible and he obviously felt terrible too. She had seen his painful expression as he had tried to get up from the bed. Although being Paul, he was determined to put a brave face on things for her sake.

Sighing, she picked up the phone and ordered breakfast. As she said her thanks to the receptionist, her cell began to ring. She replaced the receiver and walked across to retrieve her phone from her bag. She smiled as she saw Melissa's name scroll across the screen.

"Hey Mel, you're up early."

"It's not Mel, Steph. It's Kevin."

Stephanie quickly looked towards the bathroom door and was relieved to see it still shut. She heard the water run in the shower and knew it was safe to talk.

"How is he?"

Stephanie sat down on the bed, her hand absently smoothing the sheets where Paul had lain still feeling faintly warm with the heat of his body. "He's okay. He's in pain but is determined not to show it."

Kevin let out a chuckle. "That's Paul for you. He's a stubborn bastard."

Stephanie smiled and there was a slight pause at the other end before Kevin continued.

"I suppose he's still pissed off with me."

She sighed and shifted her body to sit back against the pillows. "To be perfectly honest Kevin, I don't know. So far, he's refused to talk about last night."

His disappointed sigh crackled down the line. "Then he's still mad. Paul never discusses things when he's angry or upset. I guess I've ruined everything."

"Look, try not to worry about it. You told me yourself how stubborn Paul is. Just give him time. He'll come round."

"I don't think so, Steph. I really screwed up not telling him about Shawn but I thought it was for the best, you know."

Stephanie nodded as she ran her fingers through her hair knowing the predicament he had been stuck in. "I know you did and seeing what they did to one another last night, I understand exactly where you were coming from. Paul will too once he's calmed down."

"I'm not so sure. This isn't the first time I've kept him in the dark. I guess last night was just the final straw."

Stephanie could hear how distraught Kevin was and she knew Paul's words from last night had affected him badly. She honestly felt sorry for him. He was torn between Shawn and Paul and desperately trying to do the right thing for both of them. And it wasn't easy as he was now finding out to his detriment.

"Give him a few days to calm down, Kevin. In the meantime, I'll try and talk to him."

"Thanks Steph. That would really mean a lot."

Just then she realised that the water in the shower had stopped running. She heard movement from behind the door and she knew she had to end the call.

"Listen, I'd better go before Paul comes out the bathroom. Tell Mel I'll call her later and try not to worry, okay?"

"Okay. Thanks Steph and look after him for me, will you?"

"You know I will. Take care."

Stephanie hung up just as Paul walked through the door. As she tossed her phone down, she couldn't help but smile at the sight of him in nothing but a towel. She admired the way it hung low on his chiselled hips and the droplets of water that ran down his massive chest. However, her smile soon turned to a frown as she saw the bruises across his rib cage. She stood up from the bed and walked across towards him. Her hand reached out and tentatively touched him.

"That looks sore."

"It is." Paul replied as he took her hand in his and pulled her towards him. "I'm in desperate need of some TLC, you know."

She smiled as she snaked her arm around his neck. The excess water from his hair dripped onto her bare skin and the cold droplets caused her arms to lightly prickle with the chill. "How about if I promise to lavish you with every ounce of loving care I have after your meeting? Would that make you feel any better?"

Paul grinned at her and wriggled his eyebrows suggestively. "Well, you did promise to nurse me at the hospital."

"I did, didn't I?"

She pressed her lips gently against his and brushed back his wet hair as they broke apart.

"Come on Levesque, get dressed. Breakfast is on its way."

She let out a slow breath as she watched him start to get dressed. She couldn't help but think how she could broach the subject of Kevin without getting Paul upset. Maybe she would wait for a day or two and let the dust settle first. After all, it wasn't a conversation she was particularly keen to have. Not when she knew how angry Paul still was about Kevin. She just hoped he came round soon. Their friendship was just far too important to throw away and she was determined it wouldn't be yet another casualty of her marriage to Shawn.

A few hours later Stephanie looked up from the magazine she was reading and was relieved to see Paul smile as he shook hands with a small, burly man. She knew what that smile meant. The meeting had obviously gone much better than he had expected. She stood up and smoothed down her skirt as Paul slowly approached her. Despite his cuts and bruises, he still looked extremely handsome in his black pinstriped suit with his blonde hair falling across his shoulders. She smiled at him and took his outstretched hand. Their fingers intertwined as they made their way towards the entrance to the building.

"So, did everything go well? Did he like the new plans?"

Paul nodded his head as they walked through the automatic doors onto the street. "He did, thank God." He stopped on the sidewalk and turned to smile at her. "I think the sympathy over my supposed mugging worked in my favour too. He even apologised for bringing me to New York in the first place."

Stephanie chuckled but her smile soon faded as she stepped aside to let a woman pass with her stroller. Her sad blue eyes followed her and her newborn child wistfully.

Paul saw her reaction and immediately reached out and pulled her towards him. He felt Stephanie sigh as she rested her head against his shoulder. His fingers ran through the ends of her hair soothing her.

"It's funny how it hits you all of a sudden. You think you're finally getting over it then bam. You see a mother with her children or even an advert for diapers and before you know it, you're back to square one." she told him softly.

He stepped back and smiled at her gently as his thumb grazed her cheek. "It will get easier, you know."

Stephanie nodded her head. "I know."

Paul bent down and kissed her forehead. He took her hand and began to walk again. "So McMahon, are you hungry?"

"I guess I could be tempted. Why? What did you have in mind?"

"Well I was thinking of having some lunch before heading back to the hotel. What do you say?"

Stephanie turned her head to nod at him. "Okay. There's a nice little restaurant just a couple of blocks from here. They do great Italian food."

"Then lead the way."

She smiled as she gripped onto Paul's hand and led him down the street. A short while later they were seated at their table.

"Hmmm. Not a bad choice, Steph." Paul said as he looked around the room appreciatively admiring the tasteful, clean decor. He smiled as he reached across the table to take her hand.

"I do have good taste, you know." she told him.

"I know you do, babe. You're with me, aren't you?" he winked and grinned.

Stephanie shook her head and smiled. "You're awfully chipper all of a sudden. Are you feeling better?"

Paul wrinkled his nose as he shook his head slowly. "But I'm trying my best to take my mind off the pain. You know me. I don't like to wallow."

She chuckled as she squeezed his hand. "You really are something else."

She chewed on her bottom lip as the waiter approached the table. He took their order trying his best not to stare at Paul and she thanked him as he removed the menus.

"Did you see him? His eyes were practically popping his head."

Stephanie laughed as she pushed her hair behind her ears. "He's probably not used to serving lovable rogues such as yourself."

She lifted up her glass and took a sip of water. She decided now was as good a time as any to bring up the subject. It was something that had been preying on her mind for a good few weeks now. She placed her glass back down on the table and lifted her head to smile at Paul.

"So I was wondering. Do you know of any good lawyers back in Nashua?"

Paul's eyes widened at her question. He sat back in his chair as he rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"My lawyer's one of the best. I could give you his number."

He leant forward again resting his elbows on the table.

"If you don't mind me asking, why do you need one?"

Stephanie sighed as her fingers played with the ends of the cloth napkin. "I'm going to file for divorce."

Paul sat there in a surprised silence. The truth was he wasn't sure exactly what to say. Of course he was happy that Stephanie wanted to end her marriage to Shawn. He couldn't deny that he hadn't thought about it himself but he was just worried that she was jumping in too fast too soon. She had been through a lot recently. He didn't want Stephanie taking on more than she could handle. He eventually looked up to see her watching him intently, her blue eyes scrutinising his reaction. She looked almost nervous as she chewed on her bottom lip. He instantly reassured her by reaching out to take her hand in his.

"Are you really sure you want to do this, Steph?"

There was no hesitation at all as she nodded her head.

"There's no point in putting it off any longer. Let's face it Paul, my marriage to Shawn was over before it even started. I'm just sorry I hurt you by going through with it in the first place."

Paul looked at her sternly as he squeezed her hand. "Hey! I thought I told you to stop apologising or blaming yourself."

Stephanie smiled at him meekly. "I'm sorry."

"See, there you go again."

She chuckled in spite of herself and let out a slow, calming breath as she looked into his gentle brown eyes. "I guess I just want to look to the future and try and put the past behind me."

Paul stroked her hand with his thumb. "And may I ask what you see in your future?"

"You. Us." she replied almost shyly without hesitation.

His lips curved up gently. "Good answer."

Paul paused for a second as he looked at the woman across from him, the woman who was his heart and soul.

"You do know you're my life now, Steph. I can't picture it without you and I don't want to either." he told her sincerely.

Stephanie's eyes sparkled with her happiness as she smiled at Paul. She felt exactly the same way he did. She could see them both years from now sitting round the fire, looking over old photographs as they spent time with their children and their grandchildren. She knew Paul was the one, the person she would grow old with, and the thought of that didn't scare her at all. And that was another reason why she was going ahead with the divorce sooner rather than later. The sooner her marriage to Shawn was over, the sooner she could look to the future – her and Paul's future. She intertwined his fingers with hers as their hands rested on the table.

"You're stuck with me, you know. Now that I've got you, you're never getting rid of me."

Paul grinned. "I think I could live with that."

He brought their joined hands up and kissed her knuckles.

"In fact, I might just hold you to it."

Paul released her hand as the waiter interrupted them, bringing their drinks to the table. He smiled to himself as he thought about the words just spoken among one another. It appeared they had committed themselves to one another albeit unofficially. If Stephanie did go ahead with her divorce to Shawn, then he had every intention of making that commitment official but that was something he would be keeping to himself for now. The last thing he needed was to rush Stephanie into anything she wasn't ready for. He didn't want her thinking he was supporting her divorce only because it meant he was getting something out of it. He would just have to be patient and wait for the right moment. Besides it's not like there was any rush to define their relationship. After all, they had all the time in the world to do that.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

Paul sighed contentedly and rested his head back against the tub as the hot water soothed his aching muscles. Despite his best attempts not to let the pain get to him, he had finally given in to it and once they had finished their lunch, he had practically begged Stephanie to go back to the hotel. He hadn't been able to sit in that restaurant one second longer. His head had been pounding to the point where he couldn't concentrate and his back had been killing him too. He would just be glad when the effects of his concussion had worn off and he could take some pain medication.

Rubbing his hand wearily across his forehead, Paul opened his eyes just in time to see Stephanie walk towards him. His pain was temporarily forgotten as he watched her take off her robe and climb in the spacious tub beside him. His eyes hungrily travelled up her long legs and shapely curves as she lowered her body into the water across from him.

"See something you like over here?"

Paul grinned, his brown eyes crinkling at the corners. "Oh hell yeah."

His big arms reached out and pulled her closer towards him. He tried to ignore the pain in his side as their bodies touched beneath the suds. His fingers threaded through her hair as their lips met in a kiss, their foreheads resting together when they eventually broke apart.

Stephanie's brow furrowed in concern as she saw him wince when he shifted his body. "You're still not feeling too great, are you?"

"Honestly? No." Paul forced a smile as she lifted her head to look at him. "But don't worry. I'll live."

Stephanie brushed his wet hair behind his ear. "Is it your ribs?"

"That plus my head is pounding. But it was worth it. Shawn had it coming to him after what he did."

Stephanie said nothing as she rested her head on his shoulder. She chewed on her lip as Paul's hand rubbed up and down her back. She knew this was her chance to bring up the subject of Kevin but she was slightly wary. She wasn't entirely sure what his reaction would be but then again, she owed it to him to make him see that he would be making a mistake by casting aside their friendship. Not to mention the fact it would ease her personal guilt a little. She slowly tilted her head meeting his eyes.

"Paul, when are you going to talk to Kevin?"

She saw his top lip curl instantly into an angry snarl.

"Never." he shot back.

Stephanie sighed as she shifted back slightly, pressing her lips together. "Don't you think that's a little childish?"

"No, I don't. I want nothing more to do with him."

"But why? What's he done that's so bad that you don't want to talk to him?"

Paul snorted as he pushed himself up the tub, his brown eyes simmering with his anger. "Well let's see, shall we? He lied to me about your pregnancy and he deliberately kept me in the dark about Shawn. How can I trust him now after that?"

Stephanie reached out and tentatively touched his arm. "But try putting yourself in his place, Paul. Both you and Shawn are his friends. He knew that once you found out where Shawn was, you'd go after him. And after seeing the state you were both in last night, I really can't blame him."

"Look, whose side are you on here, Steph?" he snapped back. "Because it sure as hell doesn't sound like mine."

Stephanie shook her head in frustration. "This has nothing to do with sides. I just want you to see it from Kevin's point of view."

Paul said nothing as he pushed himself up to his feet. The water lapped around her as

Stephanie watched him step out the tub and grab a towel to wrap it around his waist.

"Paul, where are you going?" she sighed.

"To get dressed. I'm not staying here to listen to this."

Stephanie rolled her eyes and threw her hands up in frustration as he walked through to the bedroom of their suite. She wasn't surprised at his stubbornness to talk about Kevin. God knows she had expected it but that didn't mean he had to walk away from her.

Sighing heavily, Stephanie stepped out the tub herself and quickly patted herself dry with a towel before putting her robe back on. As she walked through to the bedroom, she saw Paul was strewn across on top of the crumpled covers with his track pants on. His face was set in a scowl with his arms folded across his chest and he refused to look at her as she approached the side of the bed.

"Paul, I don't want to argue with you about this."

"You could have fooled me." he quickly retorted

Stephanie sighed as she sat down on the bottom of the bed and her fingers absently smoothed the wrinkled comforter. "I just want you to see that you're making a mistake with Kevin."

"I don't think so."

"Well I do."

"Tough. I don't want to discuss it any more."

Paul leaned over and grabbed the remote control for the television from the night stand. His thumb angrily jabbed at the buttons switching it on. As he settled back against the pillows, he deliberately turned up the volume as he stared at the screen.

Stephanie shook her head and stood up from the bed feeling her own anger bubble to the surface.

"That's real mature, Paul."

She began to walk away before spinning back round on her heel.

"You know you really are a stubborn bastard at times."

She walked back into the bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind her. She took a few breaths as she tried to calm herself down. She could feel her tears of frustration burning the back of her throat. She hadn't meant to get angry at Paul just now but she couldn't help herself. He was refusing to listen to anything she had to say and of course, he was being a total ass about it.

Staring around the steam filled bathroom unsure what to do now she was shut inside, Stephanie walked across and pulled the plug from the tub. She perched herself on the edge as she watched the water and suds swirl and disappear down the drain. She couldn't believe everything had been so perfect up until five minutes ago but she had to admit this was probably all her own fault. She knew this morning that Paul wasn't ready to talk about Kevin and yet she was the one that had insisted on bringing the subject up. And right now, she just wished she'd left well alone. She knew that pressuring Paul wasn't the way to go about things and all she'd succeeded in doing was pissing him off. Now their last day in New York had been ruined and all she had wanted was to spend some time alone with him.

Sighing sadly, she raked her fingers through her damp strands. However, her heart jumped in surprise as she heard the knock at the door.

"Steph, can I come in?"

She slowly stood up from the tub and adjusting her robe, she walked across to unlock the door. As she opened it, she saw Paul leaning against the wooden doorframe. His brown eyes were apologetic as he offered her a tentative smile.

"Look, the last thing I want to do is fight with you, Stephanie. Can we just forget about everyone and everything else and just concentrate on ourselves right now? At least while we're here?"

Stephanie nodded at him gratefully. "I don't want to fight with you either, baby."

As she rested her head against his chest, Paul breathed her in clean, fresh scent. He felt her head nuzzle against his neck and he swallowed thickly as her mouth began to place hot, open kisses along the column of his throat. His hand reached between their bodies slowly untying her silk robe and as it fell open, he slid one arm around her waist. Her skin felt soft and warm against his fingertips and his hushed voice was thick with his desire as he dropped his head to whisper into her ear.

"Come to bed and let me make it up to you."

As Stephanie moved from his neck to look up at him, Paul's mouth sought out hers and he kissed her hard. His hand moved up to tangle in her brown hair and Stephanie let out a soft moan as his tongue entered her mouth, deepening the kiss. They were breathless when they finally broke apart and no words were spoken as Paul took her hand and led her to the bedroom. He laid her down gently on the mattress and Stephanie took care not to hurt him as she pulled his body towards her. As their lips met in another kiss, she pushed all thoughts from her mind. Paul was right. Nothing else was important. No-one else mattered right now but them. Everything else would just have to somehow fall into place….

Shawn poked his head into Kevin's room and wasn't surprised to see it empty. He was probably over at Melissa's. That must have been where he went when he left here early this morning. Shawn hadn't seen him all day and knew Kevin was pissed at him. But right now, he didn't care. All he cared about was talking to Stephanie and trying to make her see sense. He had to. There was no way he was letting her slip through his fingers.

Shawn walked across to the dresser and smiled at the piece of paper he knew he'd seen there last night. He picked it up and read the room number and hotel Paul and Stephanie were staying in and quickly turned about to head out of the apartment, picking up his coat along the way. It was time he paid them both a little visit. After all, he did have some unfinished business to attend to with the pair of them, business he was desperate to take care of.


	29. Chapter 29

Hope you don't mind a second chapter of this one too. :)

* * *

Chapter 29

Stephanie rubbed the towel through the damp strands of her hair lightly humming a tune to herself as she wandered through from the adjoining bathroom. Her lips curved up gently as she looked over in the direction of the bed and saw that Paul was still lying there fast asleep. He was flat on his stomach and was now spread-eagled across the mattress, his face buried in the soft, white pillows. His arm was stretched out across the sheets where she had been as if he was searching for her even in sleep.

Feeling a warm glow at that thought, Stephanie threw the towel on the large wingback chair before walking over to her suitcase. Just then Paul mumbled something incoherently before turning his head to the opposite side and falling silent again. She smiled as she reached in her case and began to search through her clothes. It wasn't the first time she had been witness to Paul talking in his sleep. In fact, it was an occasional habit of his especially when he was dead to the world much like he was right now. One night she'd even managed to have a semi-conversation with him about her choice in lingerie. She had found it all extremely amusing as well as cute and had told Paul so the very next morning over breakfast. But of course he had no clue what she was on earth she was talking about and his confused brown eyes had stared back at her as he blatantly denied doing any such thing. A moment later he was making his excuses and getting up from the table looking just that tiniest bit embarrassed over it all.

Stephanie's blue eyes sparkled with her amusement as she wandered over to the side of the bed, her clothes balancing across her arm as she bent down to brush Paul's blonde hair from his face. He looked so peaceful and she was glad he was finally getting some rest. Paul had been absolutely exhausted when they had finally gotten back to the hotel although there had been no evidence of that exhaustion whatsoever as he had made love to her twice this afternoon. God, the things this man made her feel was simply incredible. It was like he had a roadmap to her soul and he knew exactly what she needed or wanted from him. In fact even now her whole body was tingling at the thought of him touching her and kissing her once again. But as her finger trailed down to trace his slightly parted lips, Stephanie decided that while she would be more than happy for round three, Paul needed his rest and she would let him sleep for a little while longer. She would wake him up in time to take her out to dinner tonight and maybe, just maybe when they got back to their hotel room she would let him pick up where they had left off this afternoon.

A crooked smile crossed Stephanie's face as she pulled the bed sheet up round Paul's shoulders. Her eyes lingered on him for a second longer, admiring him before she turned away to get dressed. She was just reaching to unwrap her towel when she heard the knock at the door and her brow crinkled in confusion wondering who it could be. Apart from Kevin and Melissa, no-one knew they were even here.

Stephanie placed her clothes down on the end of the bed and made her way to the door. She got the shock of her life when she opened it to see her estranged husband standing in the hallway. Her stomach churned anxiously and she swore she was trembling as she swallowed hard and took in Shawn's appearance. He looked to be in as bad a shape as Paul was. His face was cut and bruised and his bottom lip looked swollen and extremely painful. Not that she felt any sympathy towards him. She didn't. She just felt uncomfortable and horribly awkward around him.

"Steph." Shawn said nodding his head in a greeting. As he stood there watching her, Stephanie became aware that she was wearing nothing apart from her towel. Embarrassed, she instinctively wrapped her arms around her chest as her blue eyes flashed at him.

"Shawn, what the hell are you doing here?"

He sighed as he ran his fingers through his hair. "I just thought we could talk."

"Really? Would that be with your mouth or your fist?" she shot back.

"Hey, Paul threw the first punch. Don't blame me for retaliating."

"And don't you blame him for coming after you. Not after what you did to him, to us."

Shawn heard the waiver in Stephanie's voice as she looked away, pressing her lips together and his expression softened as he reached out to touch her arm. But he felt a pang in his chest as she noticeably flinched away from him and his eyes were sad as he stared back at her.

"Look Steph, I don't want to fight with you. I just want to talk."

Stephanie said nothing, remaining silent as she lowered her head, chewing on her bottom lip.

"Please, Steph. I'm still your husband. Don't you think you owe me this much?"

She slowly lifted her head and after a slight pause, she nodded at him. "Okay but not here. Meet me in the bar downstairs. I'll be there in five minutes."

Stephanie didn't even wait for his response as she closed the door behind her and let out the breath she hadn't even been aware she was holding. As she looked across at the bed, she was relieved to see Paul's eyes still firmly closed, grateful that he was still fast asleep. Because as much as she felt sick at the thought of seeing Shawn, she knew this was something she had to do on her own. Paul getting involved would only complicate things no matter how good his intentions would be. She knew that he'd want to be with her, protecting her but she was sure she could handle one conversation with Shawn. And she guessed Shawn had been right. After everything she had put him through, she did feel that she owed her soon to be ex-husband that much.

Quickly throwing her clothes on before she had time to think or even reconsider her actions, Stephanie ran her fingers through her damp hair. She found a clip on the dresser and pinned up the loose waves. She was half way to the door when she realised there was something she had to do first and reaching into her bag, she retrieved a pen and a piece of paper. She hurriedly scribbled a note to Paul and folding it in two she placed it on the nightstand where he was sure to see it when he woke up.

As Stephanie passed by him, she watched him sleep for a second, feeling the overwhelming need to be beside him, safely wrapped in his arms. But she quickly shook that feeling aside as she bent down to kiss him gently on the cheek. She reached out to touch his face one more time, her hand lingering for a second before quickly pulling it away and leaving their room.

* * *

"Shawn, are you home?"

Kevin's voice echoed throughout the empty apartment. He sighed and raked his fingers through his hair as he realised he wasn't going to get a response. God knows where his friend had disappeared to this time and right now, he wasn't sure if he actually cared.

"I take it he's not here?" asked Melissa, lightly squeezing his hand.

Kevin shook his head as he smiled at her. He let go of her hand to slide his arm around her waist instead and he pulled her close to him. As he breathed in the fresh scent of her hair, he realised how glad he was that he had her right now. He would be going crazy otherwise. Not only was he worried about Shawn, he was also agonising over Paul but he had to admit that Melissa had provided a very welcome distraction from the dramas involving his two friends. And if he was honest, she was definitely becoming more than a distraction. He had grown extremely fond of her over the past month and that fondness was growing day by day. She would probably be the first woman since his ex-wife that he had developed genuine feelings for, feelings that he certainly couldn't deny any more. And they were feelings that had certainly surprised him. Melissa was nothing like any of the previous women he had dated. Apart from being extremely beautiful, she was very funny and very smart. She had become important to him and he knew she was a good reason why he had yet to return to Miami and why he was more than happy to put off making that particular decision in the meantime. But he knew it was something he would have to think about sooner rather than later. He had a nightclub to run and Bill could only cope so long on his own.

"Do you know where Shawn could have gone?"

Melissa's gentle voice interrupted his thoughts and Kevin slowly shook his head as he spotted the half-empty vodka bottle on the table. He sighed as he dropped a kiss in her hair.

"It wouldn't surprise me if he's gone somewhere to get drunk. It seems to be Shawn's way of coping lately."

Melissa's eyes followed his gaze and she sighed. "It's all such a mess, isn't it?"

"You can say that again."

His big hand squeezed her shoulder affectionately as he guided her to the sofa. He closed his eyes as he rested his head against the back of the seat.

"He'll come round, you know."

Kevin's eyes popped open again and he turned his head to see Melissa smiling at him gently. He didn't need to ask who she was talking about. Her fingers intertwined with his as she held his hand.

"I don't know Mel. I think I really fucked up this time." he admitted.

"But you were only looking out for him, Kev. Paul will realise that once he's had time to think about things and calm down."

Kevin smiled as he brought their joined hands to his mouth and his lips brushed against her knuckles. He lifted his head as he shifted his body to sit upright. "You don't know Paul very well, do you? He's a stubborn bastard. Stubborn and determined. He'll dig his heels in especially if he's convinced he's right."

"That maybe so but I do know Stephanie and I know she'll be equally determined not to let Paul shut you out. She knows how much you mean to him."

"You mean meant to him." Kevin sighed as he pushed back his hair with his free hand. "I guess I told one lie too many this time."

"But with the best of intentions. Paul will see that."

He smiled at her, reaching up to cup her face in his hand. "You know that's one of the things I like about you. Your eternal optimism."

Melissa smiled at him almost bashfully. She tilted her head slightly so that it nestled against his hand. "And would there happen to be anything else you like about me?" She chewed on her lip nervously waiting for his answer. She didn't have to wait long.

"Everything."

That one word sent a tingle down her spine and Melissa couldn't stop the huge smile that quickly spread across her face. Although she knew Kevin probably cared about her, they hadn't openly expressed how they felt about one another. She guessed they hadn't gotten to that stage in their relationship. It was good to have some indication that perhaps his feelings ran as deeply as hers did. She bit down on her lip as Kevin's thumb gently traced her cheekbone.

"You're one special lady, Miss Cunningham."

She felt her heart race as her eyes locked with his. "And you're one amazing guy." she said softly.

Her eyes closed as their lips met in a gentle kiss. She lifted her arm and wrapped it around his neck, her fingers touching the ends of his hair. She felt his tongue run along her bottom lip, teasing it. She parted her lips slightly and she let out a soft moan as his tongue quickly entered her mouth, clutching his strands in her hand as he kissed her passionately. She was breathless when they finally broke apart.

"Want to take this to the bedroom?"

Melissa felt her body tingle at the desire she saw in Kevin's eyes. All thoughts of dinner and a movie left her head as she swallowed thickly nodding her head.  
Kevin said nothing as he stood up. He pulled her to her feet and kissed her once more, all his worries about Paul and Shawn quickly disappearing as he led her by the hand towards the bedroom.

* * *

Stephanie walked into the small hotel bar and immediately spotted Shawn in a booth in the corner. She paused for a second letting out a calming breath then cautiously began to approach him. She was sure she was shaking and her stomach was literally in knots at the thought of being alone with him. Their last one-on-one conversation had left her with an extremely bitter taste in her mouth as well as an ache in her heart. But at least this time they were in a busy, public place. The bar was filled with people and any confrontation would hopefully be kept to a minimum. With any luck Shawn would say what he needed to say and then just leave. She really wasn't in the mood for hanging around.

Just then Stephanie saw Shawn look up in her direction but she refused to meet his steady gaze as she sat down on the seat directly across from him folding her arms across her chest defensively.

"Thanks for coming."

She nodded her head curtly still refusing to meet him in the eye. Instead she lifted up a napkin and her fingers began to nervously fold and unfold the corners.

Shawn noticed her fidgeting and he sighed as he held up his bottle of beer. "Can I get you a drink?"

"No thanks."

He sighed once more. Stephanie still refused point blank to look at him but at least she had answered his question. He would take that as a start. He saw her watch the table across from them as he picked at the label on his bottle.

"So, are you back in New York for a while?" he asked her.

Her head snapped round in his direction. Her normally warm, inviting blue eyes were cold and hard as they glared back at him. "Please don't waste my time with polite conversation. Say what you came to say and then we can get out of here."

"But surely we can have a civil conversation?"

Stephanie vehemently shook her head. "I think we're past civil, don't you?"

Shawn let out a heavy sigh as he placed his bottle down on the table. "It kind of looks that way now, doesn't it?"

She said nothing as she threw down the napkin, folding her arms once again across her chest. Her lips were pressed together tightly as she tried to her best to remain calm.

"So, I hope Paul is in worse shape than I am."

Stephanie swallowed hard as she raised her head to meet his eyes. She clenched a fist in anger as she realised Shawn was practically sneering at her. "If you're only here to cause a fight Shawn, then I suggest you leave and stop wasting my time."

Her tone was serious and cold and Shawn realised he had gone too far. He immediately held up his hands in a truce.

"I'm sorry but you can't blame me for feeling bitter towards the guy. He did steal my wife."

"Nobody stole me Shawn. I'm not some god damn possession."

Stephanie sighed as she uncrossed her arms and rested them on the table. She saw Shawn look down at her hands and a scowl crossed his face.

"You're not wearing your wedding band."

She immediately lifted her hands from the table and rested them out of sight on her leg as she shook her head in disbelief. "Why would I? Our marriage is over and I'm in love with another man."

Shawn snarled at her. "Are you deliberately trying to antagonise me, Stephanie?"

"No Shawn. I'm just telling you the truth."

He clenched his jaw in anger as he picked up his bottle of beer and took a few long gulps of his drink. He silently told himself to stay cool despite her needling him about Paul. He needed to be calm and rational if he was to convince Stephanie she needed to be with him instead. The last thing he wanted to do was go off on one and send her back into the arms of that bastard Levesque. Shawn took a couple of slow breaths and he placed his bottle back down on the table. He decided to use a different approach and gave her a small smile as he lifted his head.

"We did have some good times though, didn't we?"

"Before we got married? Yes. Yes we did."

He continued, encouraged by her reply. "And you were in love with me?"

"Once upon a time. Or at least I thought I was until I met Paul." Stephanie replied watching the hopeful glint in his eyes disappear and be quickly replaced with anger. She didn't care. She just needed to get through to him and make him see then truth.

"I'm talking about us not him."

"But there is no us, Shawn. Not anymore. Can't you see that?"

She could see he was slightly taken aback by her bluntness but she didn't care. She needed to make sure she got her point across. Their marriage was over. He needed to understand that. That's why she was going to tell him about the divorce now rather than later. He was going to find out soon enough anyway.

"It's over between us and that's why I'm filing for divorce when I go back home."

Shawn's eyes instantly widened in surprise. "B-but why? Don't you think you're being a little hasty?"

"No. Our marriage is over Shawn. We both need to move on and get on with our lives."

"But I don't want to move on. Not without you." he protested.

Stephanie watched as he dropped his head, unable to look her in the eye. She couldn't help but feel slightly moved by the vulnerability she knew she had heard in his voice. And she was extremely surprised at that. Despite loving him for the better part of three years, the last thing she expected to feel was any compassion towards him. After all, this was the man that hit her and had been violent towards her causing her to lose her unborn child. She should feel hatred towards him; disgust even. But she couldn't. No matter how cruel and damaging Shawn's actions had been towards her, she couldn't help but feel partly responsible for the way he had acted. She had hurt him so badly she had turned him into a man that she knew wasn't him. The Shawn she knew was loving and kind but the man sitting before her was bitter and broken. A product of the mistake she had made when she had married him. It wasn't his fault that he wasn't the man she needed but their marriage was over and he had to realise that for his sake as much as hers. Hanging onto the past wasn't going to do either of them any favours. She had realised that and now it was time for Shawn to do the same.

Stephanie tentatively reached out and touched his hand to get his attention. She watched as his head slowly lifted up to meet her gaze and swore she thought she could see tears in his eyes but he blinked rapidly and they were gone.

"You have to Shawn. Please. I'm sorry but I just don't love you anymore."

Her voice broke towards the end of her sentence as her big pleading eyes glossed over with her tears.

Shawn looked away unable to bear them. Her words were like a knife to his heart and he tried desperately to stop his own tears from falling. He didn't know if it was the sadness or the sincerity he could hear in her voice but he knew, without a doubt, that he was wasting his time here. He knew Stephanie. No amount of pleading or talking was going to save his marriage. It was over. The question was could he accept it and let her go when every part of him wanted to scream at her and beg her to stay.

"I never meant to hurt you Shawn."

He lifted his shoulder in a shrug still avoiding her eye and taking very little consolation from her confession. "But you did." he told her.

Stephanie sniffed as she wiped her face, the tears continuing to slip over her lashes as all the emotions she had kept inside slowly began to overwhelm her.

"I know and I'm s-sorry." she stammered. "But you hurt me too remember? And I'm going to be honest with you. I don't know if I can ever forgive you. I-I don't know if I can forgive you for killing my baby. Not when every time I look at you, I'm reminded of what you've done. And I hate you for it, Shawn. Part of me always will."

Shawn closed his eyes as he listened to Stephanie quietly sob. He knew that deep down she was right. He had hurt her and he hated himself for what he had done to her. He couldn't blame her for not forgiving him. He could never forgive himself. His anger and rage had harmed an innocent child. He had done something so horrid and so cruel that the woman he loved could hardly look him in the eye. How could he ever expect her to be with him now and love him back?

Shawn swallowed hard knowing what he had to do. He could feel his heart shattering into pieces as he told her softly. "Just go."

Stephanie sniffed, trying to control her tears as she looked at him in a stunned silence. She waited for some sort of confirmation, not sure if she had heard him correctly or not.

Eventually Shawn lifted his head and the tears shimmered in his sad grey eyes. "Please, Steph. Just go before I lose my strength and change my mind."

Stephanie quickly stood up not wanting to question his sudden change of heart. Wiping at her face, she stepped out of the booth and walked a couple of steps before stopping in her tracks and turning back round to face him.

"Goodbye Shawn."

She didn't wait for him to acknowledge her. She spun round on her heels and practically ran out of the bar. If she had stayed a second longer, she would have heard his shaken whispered response.

"Goodbye Stephanie."

* * *

Paul jumped, slightly startled as he heard the sound of a door slamming. Disorientated, he took a second to come round before he shifted on the mattress and winced at the pain that shot through his ribs as he lifted his body to sit upright in bed. Pushing back his hair from his face, he kicked the tangled sheets from his legs and noticed that the bathroom door was closed. Stephanie was nowhere in sight.

Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he yawned as he threw back the covers and carefully got out of bed. As he pulled on his track pants, he was relieved to realise his head was no longer pounding and with any luck that meant that the concussion was gone.

But as his feet shuffled towards the bathroom, his relief was soon replaced with concern as he heard the sobs from behind the door. He turned the knob and was surprised to find it unlocked. He pushed it open and his heart instantly broke as he saw Stephanie leaning against the bath with her knees pulled to her chest and her head in her hands. She continued to sob not even noticing he was in the room. He slowly walked towards her and stopped just a couple of feet from where she was sitting.

"Steph, are you okay?" he asked her gently.

She jumped slightly at the sound of his voice and avoiding his gaze, she furiously began to wipe the tears from her cheeks. "I'm sorry." she sniffed. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"Well you slammed that door so hard I was surprised to find it still on its hinges."

Paul joked as he crossed the short distance between them and wincing slightly, he moved to sit down beside her. He brought his left knee up towards him and placing his arm around her, he brought her head to rest against his shoulder. His mouth dropped a kiss in her hair.

"So are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

Stephanie sniffed again as she wrapped her arms around his bicep and hugged it. "Promise you won't get mad?"

"Uh-oh. What have you done? Have you gone crazy with room service again?"

She lifted her head to smile through her tears, more than grateful for his light heartedness. God knows she needed that right now. "No although that idea did cross my mind. See, this amazing guy helped me work up quite an appetite this afternoon."

Paul smirked as he lifted his hand and the pad of his thumb wiped away a tear from her wet cheek. "Don't think flattery will distract me from the fact that you've been crying."

His smile slowly faded into to a concerned frown as he took in her red, puffy eyes and her shaky breaths.

"What is it, Steph? I'm worried about you."

She pressed her lips together trying to find her composure as she removed one of her arms to take his hand in hers. Her thumb lightly traced his soft skin, gently caressing his knuckles.

"I talked to Shawn this afternoon." she told him eventually.

Paul's mouth instantly curled into a scowl at the mention of his name. "I'm going to kill that bastard for upsetting you like this."

"No, Paul. It's okay."

"No it's not okay, Steph. How can it be okay? I mean look at you. You're upset and you're crying. He's got no right calling and harassing you."

Stephanie shook her head. "No. You've got it all wrong." She adjusted her body so she was facing him. Her big blue eyes stared up at him. "Just please, promise to shut up and listen to me."

Paul's mouth twitched with his smile. "You do know you can be rude as well as demanding."

"Well, you're jumping to conclusions when I'm trying to tell you what really happened."

"Okay, point taken. I'll shut up."

"Good. Thank you." she replied, her eyes lightly sparkling with her smile.

Stephanie glanced down at their joined hands and moved her fingers to intertwine with his. She gave him a small smile as she looked up, meeting his warm brown eyes.

"Shawn came to see me this afternoon. He wanted to talk."

"He came here?" Paul saw Stephanie frown at his interruption and he quickly apologised. "Sorry. Shut up. I know."

Stephanie smiled in spite of herself. "Like I was saying, he came here wanting to talk. You were still asleep at the time so I told him I'd meet him in the downstairs bar. I didn't want to wake you plus it was something I felt I should do on my own. I needed to tell him face to face that it was over."

Paul silently nodded showing her that he understood.

"Anyway, I met him downstairs and we did manage to talk. I told him that I wanted a divorce and that our marriage was finished for good." She paused lifting her shoulder in a shrug. "He eventually accepted it and then I said goodbye."

He stared back at her warily. "Just like that?"

"Well not exactly just like that but that's what happened give or take a few accusations along the way but I don't want to get into that. I just want to forget about it and look towards the future." she said squeezing his hand.

Paul smiled as he reached across and kissed the top of her head. "Can I just ask you one thing though?"

Stephanie nodded.

"Why were you so upset?"

She sighed as she sat back against the bath, leaning her head on his shoulder. "It was my final goodbye to everything I had lost, I guess. I was letting go of the past." She licked her lips and lifted her head to smile at him. "And now I can concentrate on the present and the future with you."

Paul smiled back at her tenderly. "I think I can live with that."

He leant across to kiss her but had to stop in midair as he grimaced in pain. He hissed through his teeth as he motioned for Stephanie to come closer to him. "You're going to kiss me, I'm afraid."

Stephanie grinned as she moved and shuffled round on her knees to kneel in front of him. She wrapped her arms around his neck and tangled her fingers in his hair. "You know what, Levesque? I think I can live with that."

She closed her eyes as she brushed her lips gently against his and sighed contentedly as he broke away, pulling her into his arms. As she breathed him in, she knew that this was where she belonged and she had been crazy for even thinking she could try and live without him. Paul was the one. He was the man she would grow old with and get to spend the rest of her life with. She should never have doubted it. She had known it the minute she had met him and had looked into those incredible brown eyes. They were home to her; a home she would never doubt again. She and Paul were forever and she could most definitely live with that.


	30. Chapter 30

I've decided to post the last three chapters to this story. I need at least one of my fics to be complete lol! But truth is I just want it out of the way so I can concentrate on my older stories and try my best to get new chapters written. Some of them have been gathering dust for far too long and if any of you have any preferences, drop me a line. I might tackle them first instead of drifting from story to story. God knows I need someone to try and make me focus and keep me in line lol.

* * *

Chapter 30

Kevin offered Shawn a tentative smile as he sat down on the sofa next to him. His friend had been strangely quiet since his return to the apartment and his silence been a stark contrast to his ranting and raving of the past twenty four hours. Something had obviously happened and he knew that somehow it involved Stephanie. There could be no other explanation for his troubled demeanour or the tears he knew Shawn had shed privately. He also knew his friend. Shawn was devastated and broken and he couldn't help but feel sympathy towards the guy. Not only had he lost his wife, but he had lost his best friend too. And despite his protests to the contrary, Kevin knew both losses had crushed him and had turned him into the shattered man sitting before him now. And while he knew Shawn would be reluctant to talk to him, at least he had to give it a try. Bottling things up would do him no good at all. Not when he knew from firsthand experience the damage it could cause to a person.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Kevin eventually asked.

Shawn sighed heavily as he continued to stare at the picture on the wall. It seemed to taunt him reminding him what he had lost. It was one Stephanie had picked when they had gone visiting some art gallery or other. But that was in the past, their past. And it was a past that didn't have a future so it needed to come down. Without saying a word, he walked across and lifted it from the picture hook.

"Shawn, what are you doing?" Kevin asked with a puzzled look on his face.

"I was sick of looking at it. Never mind the fact I hate the fucking thing anyway." said Shawn placing it on the floor and as he looked up, he caught sight of another picture he didn't want to see only this one was for entirely different reasons.

He felt the dull ache in his chest as he picked up the framed photo of himself and Stephanie together on their wedding day. He let out another sad sigh as his fingers lightly traced the glass.

"It was all a sham, wasn't it?" he said.

Kevin sighed as he pushed back his hair with his hand. "Your marriage was a sham, yes but not your relationship. That was for real."

"I thought we would grow old together, you know. I even had it planned. We were going to move to some quiet little town with a beach somewhere. Stephanie loves the ocean."

Shawn stopped abruptly placing the picture face down on the table. He let out a shaky breath as he turned towards friend.

"I guess I have to get used to the fact that it's over between us."

Kevin's eyes went wide shocked by his admission. He couldn't help but wonder what had caused the change in heart. It was only a matter of hours ago that Shawn had vowed to get Stephanie back. Now he was standing here openly admitting their marriage was over. Something must have happened to make him change his mind. He was about to ask what when Shawn beat him to it. It was almost as if his friend had been able to read his mind.

"I went to see her today."

Kevin watched him sit down on the sofa. He had a million questions running through his head but he waited for Shawn to continue. He needed to let him talk about it in his own way and his own time.

"She told me she didn't love me anymore and that it was over between us."

Shawn's voice wavered at the end of his sentence. It was obviously upsetting him to talk about it but it was something he needed to get off his chest.

"She told me she could never forgive me for what I had done to the baby and I don't blame her. How can I when I'm not sure I can ever forgive myself."

Shawn wiped furiously at the solitary tear which had escaped down his cheek. He didn't want to cry. God knows he didn't deserve to.

Kevin sat down beside him and patted him on the shoulder. And although he knew it provided little comfort, he wasn't sure what else to do. There was nothing he could say that would change what had happened. The only thing he did want to know was where Paul had been through all of this. He couldn't imagine him letting Stephanie face Shawn alone. He was fiercely protective of her and rightly so after everything she had been through. But at the same time, the conversation between Shawn and Stephanie had sounded fairly civil. He couldn't see that happening if Paul had been there. The hatred between his friends was too strong right now.

His curiosity eventually got the better of him and at the risk of antagonising Shawn, Kevin asked the question that was on the tip of his tongue. "Was Paul there?"

Shawn's head whipped round to glare at him and his eyes simmered with his hatred. "No he fucking wasn't. And I'd appreciate it if you never mention that bastard's name in front of me again. It's because of him my marriage to Stephanie is over you know. He knew she was my wife and yet he went in pursuit of her anyway. He can rot in hell as far as I am concerned."

Without saying another word, he pushed himself off the couch and stormed across the room towards his bedroom. Kevin flinched as the door slammed loudly and sighing heavily, he leant back in the chair. Selfishly, he had always hoped that once the dust had settled, somehow Paul and Shawn could find a way to be friends but he knew now that he had been seriously deluding himself. Things would never ever be the same between them. There had been so much anger and pain that any bridges had been well and truly burned. The only thing that remained was his individual friendships with them both although right now, even they were on shaky ground; one of them in particular.

Kevin stood up abruptly having come to a decision. Paul might be willing to give up on their friendship but he wasn't, at least not without a fight. He had nothing to lose by going and confronting him and trying to make him see sense. And if he didn't listen to him well, it would be Paul's loss. At least he could say that he tried.

"Shawn, I'm going out. I'll be back later." he called out.

He got no reply but he hadn't been expecting one. He grabbed his coat and made his way out the door pleasantly surprised to see Melissa walking along the hallway. "Hey baby. What are you doing here?" he asked her.

Melissa smiled as he placed a kiss on her cheek. "I was coming to find you and by the looks of things, I got here just in time."

Kevin smiled as he held her hands in his. "You caught me in the middle of a decisive moment. I was on my way over to the hotel to see Paul before he leaves tomorrow."

"Then it's just as well I caught you. He's not there."

He frowned and his disappointment meant he failed to notice the smile on Melissa's face. "Shit! Trust that stubborn bastard to head back to Nashua early."

"But he hasn't. He's still in New York." she said, smiling widely.

Kevin began to get suspicious as his eyes narrowed in her direction. "What's going on?"

Melissa grinned as she pulled him by the hand. "Come with me and I'll tell you."

As Kevin followed behind her, she congratulated herself on how relatively easy that had been and wondered if Stephanie was having as easy a time with Paul. She hoped so because quite simply their plan wouldn't work without him…..

* * *

Stephanie pushed the cheesecake around her plate as she waited for Paul to come back. He had excused himself from the table to take an urgent phone call. Apparently there were some problems with last minute planning permission for a store that was scheduled to open tomorrow. She didn't know what it entailed but Paul had cursed under his breath before taking the call outside. She couldn't help but feel sorry for him because this was the last thing he needed on top of everything else that had gone on the last couple of days.

Sighing, she looked up from the table and she smiled as she saw him finally returning. She was pleasantly surprised to see him grinning as he sat back down. "You're looking pleased with yourself. Did you get the problem sorted out?"

"Of course." he replied with a cocky smirk on his face. He took a mouthful of water from his glass. "Elizabeth had filed the building warrant in the wrong place. Apparently her mind has been on other things."

He placed his glass back down. Stephanie looked at him, intrigued.

"Elizabeth. Her name doesn't ring a bell. Have I met her?"

Paul rolled his eyes. "Obviously not because believe me, you would remember if you had."

"Why?"

"Because she would have interrogated you the second she saw you, that's why."

He shifted in his chair and smiled.

"She's Steve's secretary. That was the guy I was on the phone to. Elizabeth is also the office gossip. Oh, and her talents stretch to gambling too."

He chuckled and shook his head. His conversation with Steve had been definitely enlightening in more ways than one.

Stephanie twirled a piece of cheesecake on her fork as she absorbed the information. "Does she gamble a lot? I mean, she's not into casinos and stuff is she?"

"Oh no, nothing like that. She just likes the odd little flutter on an office pool now and again."

Stephanie nodded her head as she swallowed her dessert. "We used to have them all the time. The one I remember was a bet we had on which guy Mel would pull at our annual Christmas party. I won of course. I had inside information." She winked and grinned. "So, does she have an office pool running right now?"

"Apparently so hence the reason for the mix-up with the planning."

"It surely can't be that distracting."

"Oh it is. Elizabeth has got herself in quite a tizzy about this one" he grinned.

"What the hell are they betting on?"

"Me." Paul said simply as he sat back in his chair. "Oh, and you too."

"Us?" Stephanie looked at him dumbfounded. "Why would they bet on us?"

Suddenly it dawned on her and she snorted with laughter.

"You're kidding me, right?"

Paul pressed his lips together and shook his head. "Nope."

"But she hasn't even met me."

"She didn't have to. Lauren told her everything about you including the fact you were coming to New York with me."

He paused and grinned across the table.

"I'm not in the habit of taking my ladies on business trips so that must mean things are definitely serious."

"Well, they are, aren't they?" Stephanie replied shyly.

Paul smiled gently as he reached for her hand across the table and winked.

"Definitely."

Just then she heard her phone beep signalling she had a message and she dropped his hand to get it. She took it out of her bag and bit down on her lip to contain her smile when she saw it.

"_Kevin and I are waiting. Get your ass over here." _

Now all she needed was an excuse to get Paul to the office. She chewed on her lip thoughtfully.

"Is everything okay?"

She looked up and met Paul's concerned brown eyes. She immediately felt guilty. He was worried about her and she was busy plotting to trick him. But it was only in his best interests. She was trying to help him and surely he would see that?

She felt the anxious knots creep into her stomach as she thought about what Paul's reaction would be once he found out what she had done. God, it didn't bear thinking about. Not now when they were finally putting the ghosts of the past behind them. But she knew she would never forgive herself if she didn't try to put things right between Paul and Kevin. He had already lost one friend all thanks to her. She'd be damned if he lost another one through a mess that she'd created. And if he wasn't being so stubborn and would talk to Kevin of his own accord, then she wouldn't have to resort to taking such drastic measures. He had left her with no other choice.

"It's Mel." she told him. "I forgot I'd arranged to meet her at the office."

"The office?" he said surprised. "Why would you be meeting her there?"

"I need to pick up some manuscripts before we catch our flight tomorrow. You don't mind do you?"

Paul smiled and shook his head. "Of course not but you do know I'm coming with you. I don't want you going there on your own. Not at this time of night."

Stephanie smiled to herself as she watched Paul summon the waiter. She had banked on his chivalry and she wasn't disappointed. This had gone perfectly and much easier than she had thought. She just hoped it didn't dawn on Paul that Melissa might not exactly be on her own either because if he had any idea that Kevin was there, her plan was over before it had even begun…

* * *

Meanwhile Melissa was waiting patiently in the office smiling as she watched Kevin start to spin himself around on the black leather chair.

"You know this is really comfortable. I'm buying one of these babies when I get back to Miami."

The words hung thickly around them and Kevin pressed his lips together as he silently cursed himself for opening his mouth. It was the first time he had mentioned going back home and although it was a discussion they needed to have, he hadn't exactly planned on having it so soon.

"So when are you thinking of heading back?" Melissa asked as she sat down on the edge of the desk beside him. She was trying her best to act calm but inside the blood was beating in her ears and she felt like screaming. She was falling in love with him. The last thing she wanted was to lose him.

"I don't know. I haven't really given it much thought." Kevin sighed, reluctant to say anything out loud. "Maybe in a week or so." he offered.

She nodded and stood up blinking back the hot tears that had sprung to her eyes. She turned away determined not to break down in front of him. After all, it wasn't like she hadn't known it was coming. His departure had always been at the back of her mind and a constant reminder that her happiness was only temporary and guaranteed to end.

Melissa wandered across to stand in front of the window and looked down at the street below. A couple were kissing and laughing as if they were mocking her misfortune. She felt herself tense as Kevin's arms wrapped around her from behind.

"I'm sorry." he said softly. "I guess we should have talked about this before now. I just kept putting it off not sure what to say."

Melissa shrugged her shoulders as she kept her attention focused on the people down below. She had to. She didn't want to see the pity in his eyes. "There's nothing to say. We had fun and now you're leaving. End of story."

Before Kevin had a chance to reply, he heard Paul and Stephanie arriving. Their laughter echoed down the empty corridor and he felt Melissa pull away, his arms dropping reluctantly to his side.

"Remember stay here and be quiet." she whispered before scurrying from the office and greeting Paul and Stephanie in the hallway.

Kevin sighed as he listened to them and stood beside the filing cabinet in the corner of the office. He would just have to worry about Melissa later. Right now he had something else to deal with and he prayed to God, he didn't fuck it up.

"I got the manuscripts out of your office and brought them in here."

He watched Melissa walk in and linger by the door. Both Paul and Stephanie followed her and once they were safely inside, she closed the door over and locked it.  
He bit down on his lip trying to conceal his snort of laughter as he witnessed the mixture of confusion and amusement on Paul's face.

"Should I be worried for my safety or thanking my lucky stars that I'm being locked in this office with two beautiful women?"

"Back off Levesque. The blonde one is mine."

Paul's top lip curled in anger at the sound of his voice. He slowly lifted his head to see Kevin walk out from behind the cabinet. He shook it in disbelief and turned to glare at Stephanie.

"What the fuck is he doing here?" he asked her.

Stephanie swallowed hard. She could see his face was flushed with anger and his brown eyes were almost black. Suddenly her plan seemed like the worst idea in the world but they were here now and there was no turning back for any of them.

Letting out a calming breath, she tried to reason with him.

"I invited him. You guys need to talk."

"Talk?" snorted Paul as he glared at her. "I don't want to talk. Not to him. Now open this door and let me out of here."

Although his voice was controlled, Stephanie knew it was taking everything he had not to lose his temper. His fists were clenched and his whole body was rigid with his anger.

"But Paul…."

He held up his hand to silence her plea. "No buts, Stephanie. Open that damn door now!" he shouted.

"Paul, calm down man! There's no need to shout at her like that."

His head whipped round to glower at Kevin. "It's none of your fucking business. Stay out of it." he snarled.

Stephanie placed her hand on his arm as she tried to plead with him. "Please. Why won't you stay and try and sort this out?"

"Because I don't want to sort anything out. Not with him." he shot back childishly pulling his arm away and raking his fingers through his hair.

"I told you he was a stubborn bastard."

"Yeah, well you're a lying bastard." snapped Paul glared at Kevin almost daring him to challenge him on that. Kevin was more than happy to oblige. After all, at least it meant they were getting things out in the open.

"I only did what I thought was best at the time." he told him.

"Best for who, Kev? Best for me, best for Shawn or best for you?"

Paul turned away from him and walked across to the window. His fists still remained tightly clenched as he stood in the very spot occupied by Melissa a short while ago. His shoulders rose and fell with his controlled breathing and Kevin sighed as he looked across at Stephanie. She waved her hand urging him to talk to him as she moved to stand in the corner next to Melissa. He lingered for a moment before taking a few footsteps closer to Paul and trying again.

"Maybe you could try and see things from my point of view." he urged. "After all, I was the one constantly stuck between you and Shawn."

He paused for a beat waiting for any sort of comeback but when he didn't get one, he decided to continue. Paul seemed to be listening and that was a start at least.

"I didn't intend to lie to you or hide anything from you. But there were things I felt you were just better off not knowing. I was trying to protect you."

"How is lying to me protecting me?" Paul asked still facing the window.

"Because I didn't want you hurting any more than you already have." Kevin took another couple of steps forward until he was standing just behind him. "I saw the mess you were in Paul after Shawn and Stephanie got married. I had to pick up the pieces, remember? And you'd just gotten over that and were finally happy again when you lost the baby. I could see the pain and devastation in your eyes. You were totally heartbroken."

He licked his lips as Paul's head dropped forward to gaze down at the floor.

"But underneath all that pain, I saw your anger, Paul. I was scared that if I told you about Shawn, the pair of you would end up killing one another and I was right. Just thank God Stephanie woke me when she did last night because if we hadn't interrupted that fight, it could have happened. One of my best friends could be fucking dead right now and do you think I wanted that, Paul, huh? Do you think I wanted you six feet under?"

There was an eerie silence until Paul eventually spoke.

"It wouldn't have come to that." he said softly.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

Kevin shook his head and grabbed his arm pulling him round to face him. His eyes were stern as they scanned his bruised face.

"Look at the mess you're in, Paul. Shawn isn't much better. The pair of you beat one another senseless. Another five minutes and they'd have been carting you off in an ambulance or even a fucking body bag."

Paul snorted back. "You always were dramatic."

"I'm not being dramatic, Paul. I'm being honest. You and Shawn would have killed one another. I knew that and I had to try and stop it. That was the reason I never told you he was back in New York."

"Then why agree to tell me in the first place."

"Because you wouldn't have taken no for an answer! You're a relentless bastard as well as a stubborn one."

"Nice to know you think of me so highly." he shot back.

"Cut the crap, Levesque. You know I do. Why do you think I agreed to this whole set-up in the first place? I couldn't let you go back to Nashua without trying to make things right between us. You're my buddy Paul. I don't want to lose you. I don't want to lose our friendship."

Paul sighed and his hand rubbed thoughtfully at his chin. He found his anger begin to slip away as he thought about what Kevin had said about the situation with Shawn. He had to admit in hindsight it made a lot of sense and if he was being honest and the shoe was on the other foot, he would have probably done the same. After all, it wasn't like he had deliberately set out to lie to him. Kevin would have been stuck between a rock and a hard place. In fact he had been ever since the day he had confessed to him that he had fallen in love with Stephanie. He had just never taken the time to see it that way. He guessed his own hotheadedness had gotten in the way of his judgement causing him to lash out without just cause.

"Friends?"

Paul looked up to see Kevin's outstretched hand in front of him. As he glanced across the room, he saw Stephanie watching him. He saw the hopeful look on her beautiful face and he knew he could never disappoint her. He knew what he had to do. Hell, if he was honest, he was going to do it anyway. It didn't mean he couldn't have a little fun making him sweat a little. "I don't know Kev." he shrugged.

Kevin swallowed hard as he saw the serious expression on his friend's face. But as he looked into his eyes, he saw the mischievous glint that gave the game away.

"I was hoping to get a break from your sorry ass." continued Paul.

"Well you're going back to Nashua tomorrow. You won't have to see my sorry ass again for months."

"Is that a promise?"

Kevin nodded. "You're damn right it is."

"Then go on. Let's shake on it."

Paul grinned as he reached out to take Kevin's outstretched hand. However he had pulled it away, holding it up in the air instead.

"I'll only shake if you admit you're a stubborn bastard."

"Well I'll only shake if you admit to being a total asshole."

Stephanie's frustrated sigh echoed around the four walls. "For the love of God, will the pair of you just shake hands already!"

Kevin chuckled. "Your woman is getting impatient Levesque. Just shake my damn hand."

Paul's brown eyes twinkled with his smile as he clasped it and shook it firmly.

"Thank God!" exclaimed Stephanie as she walked towards them, her heels clicking on the highly polished floor. "I swear you guys are worse than children."

Paul's mouth curved into a suggestive smirk. "Does that mean I can look forward to a spanking later on?"

"Maybe."

She winked at him and let out a scream as he grabbed her, pulling her towards him. She placed her hands on his chest as he slid his arms around her waist. His brown eyes looked at her tenderly and his smile was meek.

"I owe you an apology. I shouldn't have shouted at you like I did. I'm sorry."

"Eh, it's forgotten. Besides, it was worth it to see you guys make friends again."

Paul shook his head. "I can't believe you planned this. You really are a devious little minx."

But his playful tone turned serious as he reached out to curl his hand around her face.

"But thank you. You saved this stubborn bastard from losing another friend."

He pressed his lips against hers in a slow, lingering kiss.

"Hey, break it up you two. It's time to go."

Paul and Stephanie broke apart just in time to see Melissa unlock the door. Kevin followed her out into the corridor while Stephanie grabbed the manuscripts from the desk.

"So it wasn't all a ploy then? You really are going back to work?"

She nodded at Paul as she followed him out the door. "I was thinking the spare box room downstairs at home could make a nice little office for me. What do you think?"

"I think you can do whatever the hell you want as long as you're happy."

Stephanie smiled. "I am."

Paul grinned and wrapped his arm around her shoulder as they followed on behind Kevin and Melissa. But his grin faded and his brow furrowed curiously as he noticed the distance between them. By the looks of things they weren't even talking to one another either. "Steph, has something happened between Kev and Mel?" he asked.

"Not that I'm aware of. But Mel has been really quiet tonight. She hardly said two words to me in the office. Maybe they've had an argument or something."

He nodded his head as they made their way out the building. They got out into the street just in time to see Mel pull away in a cab. Paul walked across to Kevin who was standing by the kerb looking slightly perturbed.

"Kev, what happened?" he asked.

"I don't want to talk about it." Kevin sighed as he brushed his hair back with his hands. "Listen, I'm going back to check on Shawn. Will I see you guys before you head off tomorrow?"

Paul nodded. "We don't leave until the afternoon. Listen Kev, you know where I am if you want to talk, right?"

"Yeah. Look, I'm going to make tracks. Call me in the morning and we'll meet up."

He raised his hand in farewell as he walked down the sidewalk.

Paul sighed as he watched him go. "Something's wrong, Steph."

"I know." She leant her head against his shoulder. "Listen, it's late. Why don't we go back to the hotel and get some rest. We'll talk to them in the morning once they've both had the chance to calm down."

He nodded as he watched her hail a cab and opening the door, he climbed in beside her. As it pulled away down the street, his thoughts turned to Kevin. He couldn't help but worry about him. He knew his friend and he was troubled. When it came to matters of the heart, Kevin usually kept his cards close to his chest but it was blatantly obvious he had fallen for Melissa. Paul just hoped he hadn't done or said anything that would jeopardise their relationship. After all Melissa had fallen for him too. It would be a shame if they couldn't work things out. Maybe he would talk to Kevin in the morning and make sure everything was fine. After all, he was his friend even if his anger had made him forget that for a while. He would just make sure that he didn't ever forget it again.


	31. Chapter 31

Chapter 31

Paul rubbed his bruised side as he sat down on the bed crumpling the covers underneath him. Stephanie was still fast asleep and he was reluctant to wake her. She had been exhausted. The past couple of days had taken its toll on her and he couldn't help but feel guilty. He knew he was partly to blame for everything. After all, he was the one who had gone after Shawn hell bent on revenge but he hadn't been able to help himself. He had been so angry and hurt. Hell, he still was. Shawn had deserved to pay for what he had done to him and Stephanie. He had taken away their child. Their precious gift had been cruelly snatched away from them but no matter how many times he had rammed his fist in Shawn's face, he knew it would never bring their baby back. But it had just been something he had needed to do. He couldn't let his pain fester away and eat him up inside. He had needed to find some way of unleashing that anger before he could move on. And that was what he was determined to do. Move on. Now that he had dealt with Shawn, it was time to let go and put that chapter of his life in the past. He needed to try and concentrate on the future.

Paul's hand reached out and his fingers lightly traced Stephanie's parted lips. That, right there was his future. She was the most important thing in his life. Her happiness was all that mattered to him and he was determined to make her happy. She had sacrificed a lot to be with him. She had ended her marriage and given up her life in New York. He just hoped she had no regrets about any of it and he had no reason to believe she did. Stephanie had stuck by his side through everything. She had even forced him see sense over Kevin.

Paul smiled as the pad of his thumb lightly grazed her cheek. He owed her a lot. He could see now he had been pigheaded and stubborn and Stephanie had saved him from making a huge mistake.

Just then his phone rang out and grimacing, Paul stood up from the bed causing the mattress squeak quietly. He removed his cell from his jeans pocket and quickly walked towards the bathroom. Stephanie was still asleep and he didn't want to disturb her. He pulled the door over behind him.

"Hello?"

"Hey man, it's me."

"Kev! How's things?"

His friend sighed heavily down the line. "Things could definitely be better my friend."

Paul frowned as he pushed his hair back with his big hand. "Is it Melissa?"

"I've tried calling her. She won't answer. I don't even know what the problem is. Goddamn women! Now I know why I've been single since my ex-wife left me."

"Not to mention the fact no-one could put up with your moaning ass." Paul said, chuckling. "Seriously though Kev, you should go round there. Try and talk to her. There's obviously something going on."

"I don't know, man. I get the feeling I wouldn't exactly be welcome. I just wish I knew what to do."

Paul could hear the dejected tone in his voice and it was obvious Kevin was worried. He cared about Melissa. He had seen it for himself. He would be a fool to let her go. He shifted the phone to his other ear as he rubbed at his eye. "Listen, do you want to meet up? Maybe we could figure something out."

"Are you sure? I know you're flying out this afternoon."

"It's cool." Paul checked his watch on his wrist. "Our flight doesn't leave for another six hours. I can meet you at Benny's in fifteen minutes."

"Thanks. I'd appreciate it. Maybe you can help me understand what's going on in that head of hers.

Paul snorted. "Kev, she's a woman. You'll never understand her."

"Hey! I heard that."

Kevin chuckled as he heard Stephanie's voice in the background. "Sounds like you're in trouble my friend."

Paul grinned. "It's nothing I can't handle. I'll see you in a bit."

"If you're still in one piece. See ya." Kevin replied, snickering.

Shaking his head, Paul hung up and walked through to the bedroom. Stephanie was sitting up in bed. She watched him approach her with a smirk on her face.

"What are you looking so smug about?" he asked her.

She lifted her shoulder in a shrug, pulling the sheets closer around her. "I'd tell you but I'm afraid you just wouldn't understand."

"Hardy har har." Paul grinned as he sat back down beside her gingerly. He tried to ignore the pain in his ribs as his hand rested against her leg. "So, I take it I'm in trouble for my comment."

Her blue eyes twinkled at him. "You're in it up to your neck, Levesque."

He raised his brow suggestively as his hand travelled slowly up the covers and along her thigh. "And there's no way I could make it up to you?"

Stephanie swallowed thickly as his face slowly moved towards hers. She could feel his breath on her lips as it hovered there. "I'm sure you could think of something."

Paul smiled, his sparkling brown eyes crinkling in the corners. "I'm sure I could."

His lips brushed lightly against hers, teasing her. His hand felt hot as it rested at the top of her leg squeezing it gently.

"I hope that's not your idea of making it up to me." whispered Stephanie. She felt his hand move further up her body. Her mouth suddenly felt terribly dry and she licked her lips to wet them.

"I wouldn't dream of it." he breathed into her mouth.

Paul began to kiss her softly as he clutched the sheets and pulled them from her body. Stephanie felt her skin prickle against the cool air from the open window. His big hand rested against her soft, creamy skin as he guided her back against the pillows. Her fingers tangled in his blonde strands bringing him closer as his mouth made a wet trail along her jaw before it sought out her neck, sucking and nibbling along the column of her throat.

Stephanie hissed in delight as his thumb brushed over her nipple. His lips began a downwards trail towards her chest as his tongue flicked out to taste her skin. Stephanie squeezed her eyes shut as his hot mouth covered her breast and when she spoke, her voice sounded breathless. "We should stop."

Paul lifted his head and looked up at her inquisitively. His eyes were heavy with his desire. "And why would we want to do that?"

Stephanie swallowed thickly as her body tingled from his touch. "Kevin." she said trying to regain her composure. "I thought you were meeting Kevin."

"Not any more." Paul turned his attention back to her, his hands skimming over her body as his lips brushed against her skin. Stephanie tried not to lose herself completely as she placed the hand over the back of his head, stilling his movement.

"You have to, Paul. He needs you."

His groan vibrated warmly on her skin. Stephanie let her hand fall away as he lifted his head.

"Why the hell did I answer the phone?" he whined. Paul took her hand and pulled her up with him.

"Because you're his friend and you want to help him."

"Actually I want to kill him right about now. If it wasn't for his problems with Melissa, I could be getting some."

"You sound awfully sure about that."

Paul smirked arrogantly. "Please! You know it's the truth."

Stephanie chuckled conceding that fact. "You're right."

He smiled and leant across and kissed her before pushing himself off the bed. He adjusted his navy shirt and picked up his leather coat from the chair. "Will you be okay on your own? I'll only be an hour or so."

"Of course." She pulled the sheets around her and stood up. She lifted her hand and fixed his messy hair. "There. Much better."

He winked at her. "Thanks." He bent down and placed a soft kiss on her lips. "I love you."

"I love you too." she replied.

She lifted her hand in farewell as he opened the door. He blew her a kiss before he closed it over behind him. Stephanie smiled to herself feeling a warm glow as she made her way to the bathroom. She let the sheet fall to the floor at the door and as she stepped into the shower, she knew she was relieved they were going home today. She couldn't wait to leave New York and put the troubles of the past couple of days behind them. But she needed to do one thing first. She had to check on Melissa. She couldn't leave knowing her friend was hurting over something. She would pay her a visit before they left for the airport. It would do her good to talk about whatever was upsetting her. God knows Melissa had been there for her more than enough lately. It was time for her to try and return the favour…..

* * *

Melissa sat in the chair by the window hugging her knees to her chest. The wind rattled hard against the window pane and she blinked, her eyes feeling extremely heavy. She had been awake all night. She couldn't sleep. How could she when her life was practically ruined. Kevin was leaving and returning to Miami. And okay, it was no great surprise. After all, it was his home. But she had still been shocked when he had told her. Saying it out loud had made it alarmingly real. It had also made the realisation of the situation she was in hit her like a tonne of bricks.

Falling in love with Kevin had been so unexpected. It had come out of nowhere. She had tried so hard not to as well. After all, she knew their relationship was only temporary but she had been blindsided by his sweetness and his charm. Kevin was like no other man she had met before. He was caring and considerate, gentle and passionate. He had quite literally stolen her heart.

Melissa sighed as she stared out of the tall bay window. The clouds in the sky were dark and threatening. They hung ominously above the streets below. It was ironic really given her circumstances. The whole situation with Kevin was like a huge black cloud hanging over her head too. Especially now considering her current predicament.

Sighing softly, Melissa stared at the stick on the window sill. The two blue lines were the last thing she had been expecting. She had only taken the damn test to put her mind at ease. She had never dreamt in a million years that the result would have been positive but it was and now she hadn't a clue what to do. She obviously wasn't enough to make Kevin want to stay. Telling him about the baby could make him change his mind but quite honestly, she didn't want it to. If he didn't want to stay for her, then she didn't want him to stay at all. It wasn't fair on her and it wouldn't be fair on their child either.

Melissa let out a shaky breath as the tears sprung to her eyes once more. The thought of being a mother terrified her especially a single one. She hadn't given a great deal of thought to children up until now. She was only twenty five. She had never imagined having kids before thirty but one thing she had always been sure of was that she wanted to bring up a baby in a loving family environment. Her mother had died of cancer when she was five. She had been terrified and devastated. Her father had tried his best to raise her and her older brother but it had been a struggle. Money had been tight and her dad had worked every hour he could to keep their heads above water. It had meant Melissa and her brother bringing themselves up on their own. And while they had survived, she had felt so alone and scared at times. She didn't want that for her own children. She wanted them to have everything that she seldom felt she had. Stability and security and being brought up by two parents who loved them unconditionally. She wasn't entirely sure she could do this on her own. She honestly didn't know if she wanted to.

Just then the doorbell rang slightly startling her. She ignored it. There was every chance it would be Kevin and she didn't want to see him. She had been ignoring his calls all morning. He had left several messages asking her to call him. She hadn't and she wouldn't. Seeing him would break her heart.

The doorbell rang again. "Mel, are you there?"

Stephanie's muffled voice filtered through the wooden door. Melissa pushed herself off the seat to answer it. She forgot her friend would be leaving today. She pushed back the chain and turned the key in the lock. She stepped aside to let her in.

"Hey. I was beginning to think you weren't home." Stephanie said smiling as she walked into the apartment. She shook off her coat as followed Melissa into the living room and placed it across the back of the black leather sofa. "I thought I was going to get blown away out there. The wind is howling."

Melissa smiled as she sat back down on the chair. She looked out the window. A tree on the sidewalk rocked menacingly back and forth. "I didn't realise it was so bad. You should have stayed inside."

"And missed my chance to say goodbye? I don't think so."

Stephanie tried to mask her concern as she sat across from her friend. Melissa was still in her pyjamas and robe and she had dark circles under her eyes. It was obvious she hadn't slept. Whatever had happened between her and Kevin was troubling her and she wasn't surprised. Although Melissa hadn't said as much, she knew her feelings for Kevin ran deep. She had seen the way she looked at him. She loved him. She just wondered what had gone wrong between them. Everything had seemed to be fine yesterday. Something must have happened at the office last night. There had been a definite friction that simmered between them.

"Can I get you a coffee? It's freshly made."

Stephanie immediately stood up and held up her hand to stop her friend from moving. "I'll get it. You stay there."

Melissa smiled at her gratefully. She curled her legs underneath her. She could hear Stephanie clattering around in the kitchen. "Where's Paul? Have you left him at the hotel?"

"No. He went to meet Kevin. I guess he wanted to catch up before we leave this afternoon."

Melissa frowned at the mention of his name. At least if he was with Paul, he wouldn't be calling her. She looked up to see Stephanie walking through with two mugs in her hand. She smiled gratefully as she took one from her. "Thanks."

"You're welcome." Stephanie took a mouthful of the hot liquid as she sat down on the sofa, her weight sinking into the soft cushions. "So, as much as I would love to chit chat, I'm running out of time. I'm going to get straight to the point."

She smiled softly at her friend as she balanced her cup on her knee.

"What's happened between you and Kevin?"

"What do you mean?" Melissa asked cupping the mug between her hands and took a sip.

Stephanie shook her head not buying her friend's attempt at ignorance. "Last night. Something has obviously happened between the pair of you so spill it, Cunningham."

Melissa sighed as she saw the no-nonsense look thrown her way. She knew she had no choice but to tell her the truth.

"The subject of Miami came up." she admitted. "I can't even remember what we were talking about at the time. But Kevin told me he's definitely going home."

"Did he say when?"

"In a week or two."

Stephanie placed down her mug on the table. She smiled at her friend sympathetically. "Mel, I'm so sorry."

Melissa forced a smile. "It's not like I wasn't expecting it, right? I mean, I always knew he would be going back some day."

"That doesn't make it any easier to deal with though, does it?"

She shook her head. She felt the tears burn her eyes. "I didn't mean to blank him last night but I just didn't know what to do. I love him, Steph. I don't want to lose him. Not now." A tear rolled down her cheek. She immediately swiped it away.

Stephanie got up and walked across. She knelt in front of her and patted her leg. "Maybe you guys can work something out. It doesn't have to be over."

"I don't think so, Steph. The long distance thing just doesn't work. Not for me, anyway."

"But still, don't you think you should talk about it?" She shifted her body slightly. "You should discuss all your options. See if there isn't some way you could work this out. There are publishing houses in Miami, you know."

Melissa sighed. "I don't know, Steph. It just seems too complicated."

"It's not complicated, Mel. Paul and I managed to work things out and things weren't exactly easy between us. If we can do it, I'm sure you and Kevin can."

Her big green eyes filled with tears. "But you knew Paul loved you. I don't even know how Kevin feels about me or even about us. Maybe he expects this to be over as soon as he leaves New York. Maybe he doesn't want it to be permanent." She sniffed as the tears spilled over onto her cheeks and all her insecurities came bubbling to the surface.

"Then talk to him, Mel. Ask him how he feels. You're never going to find out otherwise. But for what it's worth I think he loves you. He'd be a fool not to."

Melissa smiled at her through her tears.

"Come here, you." Stephanie pulled her into her arms. She rubbed her back soothingly as she sobbed. "It's going to be alright, Mel. It's going to work out."

She lifted her eyes and glanced over in the direction of the window sill. Her stomach dropped as she saw the white stick sitting there. The two blue lines became blurry as the hot tears filled her eyes and a tightness gripped her chest. Stephanie quickly broke away and blinking back her tears furiously, she stood up. "I'm sorry. I've got to go."

Melissa was in a daze as she watched her friend grab her coat from the sofa. She wiped at her cheeks as she watched her hurry towards the door. "Stephanie, wait. Where are you going?"

The door slammed shut just as she got to her feet. Melissa sighed as she pushed back her blonde hair. Turning towards the window in a daze, she suddenly figured out the truth when saw the positive pregnancy test on the sill.

"Shit!" she cried collapsing into her seat and she burst into tears.

* * *

Paul picked the label from his bottle of beer. He flicked the scraps of paper onto the table.

"They say that's a sign of sexual frustration, you know."

Paul glanced up in amusement as he sat back in his chair. "If it is, it's your fault."

Kevin frowned. "What the hell do you mean?"

He quickly shook his head. "Never mind." He took a mouthful of his drink and winced slightly as the icy cold beer hit the back of his throat. "So, thinking time is over buddy. What are you going to do about Mel?"

Kevin shook his head. "I don't know, man. I just don't know."

Paul placed down his drink and brushed his hair behind his ear. "Can I ask you something?"

"Shoot!"

"Do you love her?"

Kevin's eyes went side. "Woah! Don't you think it's a little early for questions like that? I mean, we've only known one another a month or so."

He lifted his shoulder in a shrug. "It doesn't matter how long you've known one another. The feelings can still be there. I knew I loved Steph the night I met her."

"How? You hardly knew her."

"I looked at her and I just knew. It was like fireworks going off in my head. She just blew me away, man."

"And that didn't scare you?"

Paul shook his head and smiled. "What's there to be scared about?"

"I don't know." Kevin sighed as he took a sip of his beer. "I guess I've been burned before. I'm just a bit wary about it happening again."

"Melissa isn't going to hurt you, you know. But you'll be hurting yourself if you let her get away."

Kevin snorted. "Listen to Dr Phil across the table there."

"Mock me all you like, big man. But you know it's the truth."

He sighed knowing Paul was right. He would be hurting himself by letting Melissa get away. He just wished he knew how she felt. The cold shoulder wasn't helping him any. If anything it only confused him even more.

"You need to talk to her, Kev. And more importantly, tell her you love her."

"I never said I loved her."

Paul smirked at him. "You didn't deny it either."

"Okay then, smart ass. I admit it. I do love her. Does that make you happy?"

He grinned. "Yup. But I'll be even happier when you tell Melissa."

"I would if she would talk to me. She won't even pick up the god damn phone."

"Then go round there. Bang on the door. Don't take no for an answer."

Kevin frowned as he placed his beer on the table. "I just don't know. I mean I live in Miami. She lives here. Maybe it's too complicated."

"Buy a nightclub in New York."

"You're full of bright ideas, aren't you?" he replied, smiling.

"There's nothing stopping you. And I just happen to know a very reputable architect who would be more than happy to draw up some plans for you. For the right price, of course." Paul grinned as he took another mouthful of beer.

"You're nuts. It's easy to see you've had a whack to the head."

His grin slowly faded and he appeared thoughtful as he played with the bottle in his hand. "How is he?"

Kevin was surprised by the question. He wasn't expecting him to ask. "Shawn is alright. He's accepted it's over between him and Stephanie. He just needs time to heal. You all do."

Paul nodded his head. Despite everything that had happened between them, he still felt a tinge of sadness about the situation with Shawn. He had been his best friend for years. Once he had got past all the hurt and the anger, he knew he was probably going to miss him. But that was the price he had to pay and he would have no regrets about it at all. How could he when it meant he got to spend the rest of his life with the women he loved more than anything.

"Listen, you wouldn't mind if I headed over to Melissa's now? I want to make sure I catch her."

Paul nodded. "Sure. I was just about to tell you to move your ass anyway."

"You're so full of charm." Kevin stood up and pulled on his coat. "How long before you leave?"

He looked at his watch. "Four hours or so." He stood up and grabbed his coat from the stool. "You'll let me know how it goes with Melissa before we leave?"

"Sure." Kevin pulled him into a hug and slapped his back. "If I don't see you before, have a safe journey, man. And be happy with Stephanie. You deserve it."

"Thanks." Paul smiled as they broke apart. "Just do me a favour? Don't let her go. Try and work it out. You deserve to be happy too, man." He fished in his pocket for his wallet. "I'll settle up. Get out of here."

Kevin nodded. He was on his way out of the door when Paul's voice stopped him in his tracks.

"Hey Kev. Make sure he's alright, will you?"

Kevin nodded and smiled as he left the bar. He could finally feel optimistic that Paul was going to be okay. Shawn probably would be too. Now he had to think of himself. It was time to look after his future. A future that would hopefully include the woman he loved. That's if he could even get Melissa to talk to him. Those damn women!

* * *

A short while later the elevator doors opened and Paul smiled happily as he stepped out into the hallway. He could feel the alcohol buzzing through his veins. He'd only had a few but it was still relatively early in the day. He had also skipped breakfast not to mention he had taken enough medication yesterday to flatten a horse. Drinking beer was probably not the wisest idea but after the last couple of days, he had needed it. He was just relieved this would all soon be over. In four hours time he and Stephanie would be on their way to Nashua. Hopefully their lives could get back to normal. God knows he'd had enough drama lately to last him a lifetime.

Approaching his room, Paul swiped his card and unlocked the door. He smiled as walked in and saw Stephanie curled up on the bed. Her body was huddled into the pillows and he realised she must have fallen back asleep. God knows the last forty eight hours had taken their toll on everyone.

Paul walked quietly towards the bed but the soft smile on his face soon turned to a look of concern as he heard her soft whimper. His hand shot out and brushed her hair back from her face. Stephanie's face was wet with tears. He sat down on the bed and pulled her into his arms. She buried her face in his jacket as she continued to cry.

"Steph, what's wrong? What's happened, baby?" His fingers ran through her hair as he tried to soothe her. His brow crinkled with his confusion as he listened to her sobbing. He couldn't fathom out why Stephanie was so upset. She had been absolutely fine when he had left her an hour or so ago. Now she was sobbing her heart out.

Paul clenched his teeth in anger immediately thinking of Shawn. He must have been over here hassling her again. Kevin had obviously been wrong. He hadn't got the message after all. Well, he soon would.

He let his hand fall away as he felt Stephanie lift her head. Her tear-stained face broke his heart and the pad of his thumb reached out and wiped at her cheeks. Her breathing was shaky as she tried her best to control her sobs.

"I-I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm so upset."

Paul smiled as his finger lightly grazed her cheek. "You don't have to apologise to me. Just tell me what's wrong. I'm worried about you, Steph."

Her hand touched his face tenderly. She could see the concern in his deep brown eyes. She felt like such an idiot for breaking down like that but she couldn't help it. Seeing that pregnancy test had shaken her up more than she had realised.

"It wasn't Shawn, was it? Did he come here again?" Paul asked. His brow furrowed.

Stephanie shook her head quickly. "No. It has nothing to do with Shawn."

"Then what is it? What got you so upset?"

She sniffed as she looked down. Her fingers twiddled together nervously. "You're going to think I'm stupid."

Paul lifted her face up towards his. His face wore a tender expression. "I would never think that."

Stephanie smiled at him gratefully. She let out a slow breath. "I went to Melissa's this morning. We were talking about Kevin."

"Uh huh."

"Well, she admitted she loved him and she was upset he was going back to Miami. I went to comfort her and that's when I saw it."

She paused and pushed back the hot lump in her throat.

Paul smiled at her encouragingly. "What did you see?"

Stephanie sniffed. "A pregnancy test. It was positive."

His mouth parted in shock. "Mel is pregnant?"

She nodded her head. Her tears burned her eyes. "And I know I should be happy for her. I mean, I am happy for her. It was just seeing it sitting there. It reminded me of what we had lost and I got upset. I just had to get out of there." A tear rolled down her cheek.

Paul pulled her close and hugged her tightly. "I'm sorry, Steph."

Stephanie closed her eyes as she nestled into his chest and let out a shaky breath. "I'm so selfish. She obviously needs someone to talk to and what do I do? I run out on her. I was too worried about my feelings and how upset I was."

"You weren't being selfish, Steph. And Mel will understand. She knows what you've been going through."

She felt him kiss her hair as she lifted her head. "I am happy for them, Paul. I just…. I don't know. I guess I'm jealous, that's all. They've got the baby we so desperately wanted."

Paul's face was soft as he traced her face gently. "I know. And I know it hurts for both of us but it won't be that way forever, I promise." He kissed her softly. "When it's the right time, we'll try again. We'll be a family, Steph. I want that more than anything."

Stephanie's lips trembled with her smile. "Me too." She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him close. "I love you, Paul."

"And I love you too, Steph. Always."

* * *

Kevin knocked on the door and paced around outside impatiently. He needed Melissa to answer. He just wanted to get this over with and know exactly where he stood. Paul had opened his eyes and made him realise that he and Melissa had a future together. He had been right when he said he could locate to New York. His friend had made it all sound so simple. He guessed it probably was providing Melissa felt the same way as he did.

Kevin eventually heard the key turn in the lock. His heart pounded nervously knowing he couldn't fuck this up. So much rested on this one conversation. His whole future was at stake.

Melissa's green eyes peered at him anxiously from behind the door.

"I thought we could talk." he said.

She nodded as she stepped aside to let him in. His palms were sweaty and he rubbed them against his jeans as he entered the living room. His feet shuffled nervously as he turned to face her. He could see she looked tired and she had also been crying judging by the puffiness of her eyes. His heart went out to her. He hated the thought of her being upset. She was standing there in silence watching him. He cleared his throat nervously as he realised she was waiting for him to speak.

"I had it all planned on the way over here. I knew exactly what I was going to say. But now that I'm standing here in front of you, my mind is completely blank."

Melissa gave him a wry smile. "Just say what you have to say."

Kevin nodded. She obviously wasn't going to make this easy for him. He guessed he deserved it. He sighed. He reached out and took her hands in his. Her hands were cold, like chunks of ice. "I'm not very good with words so I guess I'll just come right out and say it." He smiled. "Mel, I love you."

Her green eyes stared back at him. Her heart was pounding in her chest. He had said the words she was desperate to hear but she had to tell him the truth. She had to know for sure if he meant what he said. She licked her lips. He was watching her desperate for an answer. She gave him the only one she could. "I'm pregnant."


	32. Epilogue

Here it is. The final chapter. Hope you all enjoyed the ride. Again thanks for all the wonderful reviews for this story. It really means a lot :)

* * *

Epilogue

_One Year Later_

Kevin adjusted the corner of his tie and snarled in the mirror as he saw it still sat crooked. "Who the hell invented these things?"

"Probably the same idiot who invented these." Paul sighed as his clumsy fingers struggled with the platinum cuff links. He shook his head as he placed them in the palm of his big hand. "You know, I bet it was a woman. It's the kind of sadistic thing they would come up with."

Kevin chuckled in spite of his frustration. "You'd better not let Stephanie hear you talk like that. She'll kick your ass."

Paul snorted as he looked over at him, almost arrogantly. "Please! I'm the one who wears the trousers in our house."

"Of course you are. And that's why you had to ask her permission to go the strip club for my bachelor party."

"I did not have to ask." he replied, scowling. "I just told her and that was that."

"Told who what?"

Paul spun round on his heel to see Stephanie standing in the doorway. His conversation was quickly forgotten as his mouth parted and he stood there totally mesmerised by her. She looked absolutely stunning in a figure hugging red silk dress. Her loose curls framed her beautiful face. Her creamy skin glowed and her blue eyes sparkled brightly. He swallowed thickly as she slowly approached him. "Wow." he eventually stammered out.

She smiled at him bashfully. "Do I look okay?"

"Steph, you look amazing. Absolutely amazing." A crooked grin crept across his face as his finger grazed her cheek tenderly.

"Judging from the drool on the floor, I'd say he approves." said Kevin, chuckling. He pulled at his tie and sighed.

"You need help with that?" asked Stephanie.

"Would you?"

"Of course." she smiled as she walked over towards him. Her long manicured fingers began to straighten the tie. "So, what were you two talking about before?"

Kevin grinned. "Oh, I think Paul should answer that question."

Paul made a face at him behind Stephanie's back. "I don't remember exactly."

She patted Kevin's tie and stood back, admiring her handiwork. "There you go."

Kevin looked in the mirror, shaking his head at the perfectly straight tie. "How did you do that? I've been standing there for ages trying to fix that."

"I've had plenty of practice with Paul. His ties are always crooked." she replied. She turned round and gestured towards the man in question, who was looking down at his tie. "You see my point?"

Kevin nodded and smiled.

Paul frowned. "It's not crooked."

"It is too. Come here." She felt him watching her as she fixed the silk material. Her hand moved away and trailed slowly down his chest. As she tilted her head upwards, she saw his brown eyes twinkling right back at her.

"You just want an excuse to touch me."

"Is that so?"

"Uh huh." He grinned at her. "Admit it, Steph. You can't keep your hands off me."

Stephanie smirked. "You're right. I can't. You're just too damn irresistible."

"I know." He shrugged his shoulders. "It's a curse but what can you do?"

She bit down on her lip as her finger lightly traced his jaw line. "Oh there's plenty I could do. Believe me."

Kevin groaned from the opposite side of the room. "Guys! I'm right here you know."

Paul looked up and smiled. "What's wrong Kev? Feeling left out?"

"No. Actually, I'm feeling kind of sick."

He chuckled as he watched his friend rub his stomach and sit down on the chair. "You're experiencing pre-wedding nerves, my friend. You should have a drink. It will calm you down."

Stephanie shook her head. "Oh no, you don't. Melissa will kill me if he turns up at the wedding smelling of alcohol."

"Steph, it's one drink. We're not planning to consume the entire contents of the bar." he said, smirking. "That honour will be saved for after the ceremony."

She shook her head, smiling. "Well, I'm going to leave you guys to it. I'd better get back to Melissa."

Kevin smiled at the mention of her name. "How is she?"

"Excited and happy. We all are."

"And what about Amy? Is she okay?"

Stephanie nodded and smiled. Kevin's five month old daughter was the apple of her daddy's eye. "Mel's mom is looking after her."

She was about to leave when Paul grabbed her arm, pulling her back towards him. He smiled at her.

"You can't leave just yet." He held his palm out in front of her. "I need you to help me put these damn things on."

Stephanie laughed and took the links in her hand. She lifted his cuff and proceeded to attach them. "What would you do without me?"

"You know I ask myself that same question every day."

"And may I ask what your answer to that question might be?"

Paul reached out and rubbed her arm affectionately. "I'd be lost; totally and utterly lost."

Kevin snorted. "God, you're such a suck-up."

He glared over at his friend. "You're one to talk. You're exactly the same way with Melissa."

Kevin opened his mouth to protest but he saw Stephanie look over and shake her head in his direction.

"Paul's right. There's no point in even trying to deny it." She lifted up her boyfriend's arm and checked his watch. "Shit. There's only ten minutes to go. I'd better get back to Mel."

She rushed towards the doorway and on her way out, she stopped and blew them both a kiss. "See you down there, boys."

Paul smiled as he lifted his jacket from the back of the chair and pulled it on. He flicked his hair over the collar.

"You do have the ring now, don't you?"

He chuckled at his friend's panicked tone. "Yes, I do. It's safely in my pocket. I showed you it five minutes ago. The last time you asked."

Kevin nodded his head as he stood up and began to pace up and down.

Paul watched on bemused. "We should think about getting down there."

"I know." He stopped and looked at him. "This is it."

"It sure is."

"I am doing the right thing, aren't I?"

Paul nodded. "Of course you are."

"I am going to make her happy."

"I know."

"I just don't want to screw it up."

He smiled at his friend as he walked over and patted his shoulder reassuringly. "You're not going to screw it up, Kev. Now stop worrying about it and just enjoy it."

Kevin exhaled slowly. "Okay." He smiled nervously. "Let's do it. Let's get me married."

Paul smiled and patted his back as he followed Kevin out of the hotel room.

* * *

Kevin's arm was wrapped around Melissa as the photographer continued to snap the happy couple. When he was finally done, he turned and grinned at his wife. "Well, we did it."

"We certainly did." Melissa replied, grinning straight back. She closed her eyes as he placed a soft kiss on her lips.

"Someone wants to say hello to their Mommy and Daddy."

Melissa smiled as she took Amy from her mother. "Hello sweetheart." Her finger traced her soft skin.

Her mother, Diane, shielded her eyes from the sun. "So when are you throwing the bouquet?"

Melissa lifted her head and grinned. "I should probably do it now before we all go back inside. Does everyone know?"

Diane nodded. "They've all had their instructions."

She smiled as she looked over at Paul and Stephanie. They were standing under a blossom tree, talking together and completely oblivious to everyone around them. "Mom, will you go and drag Steph away from Paul? Tell her I want our picture taken together."

"Right-o." Diane quickly left and made her way across the lawn towards the couple.

"Stephanie doesn't have a clue, does she?"

Melissa looked away from her daughter and smiled at Kevin. "No." She rocked Amy in her arms. "By the way, she told me her divorce was finalised yesterday."

He sighed. "I know. Paul told me."

She reached up and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. She knew he was still upset about Shawn refusing to come to the wedding. But considering the circumstances, it had been the best thing for everyone. He hadn't spoken to Paul or Stephanie since the day they left New York. If he had come, things would have certainly been awkward between them.

"Here comes Stephanie now."

Melissa smiled at her friend as she walked towards them. She handed Amy to Kevin. "There you go, sweetie. Daddy will look after you."

Kevin began cooing at his daughter.

"Your mom gave me your instructions so here I am." announced Stephanie.

Melissa grinned. "Good. Come on. The photographer is just over there." She lifted up her ivory silk dress as she took Stephanie's arm and guided her across the grass.

"So, how does it feel to be married?"

"Wonderful." Melissa beamed. "I'm so happy, Stephanie. I feel I'm about to burst."

"Good. You deserve it, Mel. You really do."

They stood in front of a rose bush and smiled as the photographer began to take their picture.

"The hotel is so beautiful. Kevin's done himself proud."

Melissa smiled. "And so has Paul. After all, he designed the whole thing." She turned back towards the camera. "In fact, if it wasn't for him pulling a few strings, the place would never have been finished in time for the wedding."

Stephanie chuckled. "Paul can be quite intimidating when he wants to be."

The photographer ushered them over towards the pond. The sun beat down behind them, the rays reflecting on the water.

Stephanie let out a slow breath as her heart raced in her chest. "Mel, can you keep a secret?" she asked her suddenly.

Melissa held her hand up to the photographer signalling for him to stop. She turned towards her friend who was fidgeting with her hands, a sure sign something was troubling her. "Is everything okay?" she asked concerned.

Stephanie slowly looked up. Tears were shining in her big blue eyes. "I think I might be pregnant." she smiled shakily.

She gasped as she placed her hand on her shoulder, squeezing it lightly. "Steph, that's wonderful. Have you told Paul?"

"Not yet. I didn't want to tell him until I've taken the test, until I know for sure."

Melissa nodded and rubbed Stephanie's arm. "He'll be over the moon when he finds out."

Stephanie smiled and looked across the hotel gardens. Her heart swelled with happiness as she saw Paul walking with Kevin and Amy. She was so focused on him that she didn't see Melissa signal to her mother that it was time.

"Well, the photographs are over. I'd better throw this bouquet before we head back inside."

Stephanie chuckled as Melissa linked her arm through hers and led her towards the group of people now congregating in the centre of the gardens. "I think your cousins are planning to fight over it. We should just let them duke it out."

Melissa said nothing as she stopped suddenly and smiled at Stephanie. She pointed directly in front of her. "Go and stand over there, please."

"But why? Everyone else is in the other direction."

Melissa shook her head. "Never mind them. Just go and stand over there." She sighed as Stephanie hesitated. "It's my wedding day. My rules. Now go."

Stephanie walked to where she had been instructed shaking her head. She turned round, placing her hands on her hips. "Now what have I to do?"

"Catch the bouquet."

"But shouldn't everyone else be joining in?"

"No."

Stephanie looked at her confused. She also realised how silent it was. Everyone's attention seemed to be focused on them.

"I'm going to throw it now." Melissa winked at her from over her shoulder. "Now catch."

The flowers went flying through the air. Stephanie held her hands out just in time to catch it. As she looked down, she saw nestled between the roses the envelope with her name scrawled across it. It was Paul's writing. Her hand shook as she took the envelope out and opened it. She pulled out the piece of paper and saw the diamond at the bottom. Tears sprung to her eyes and her fingers trembled as she lifted out the ring and opened the note. The words "Marry me" stared back at her.

When she finally looked up, Paul was standing in front of her. The expression in his eyes was gentle and tender. She blinked back her tears as he took the ring from between her fingers and took her hand in his. "I-I don't know what to say."

"Say yes, you idiot." Melissa placed her hand over her mouth as the wedding guests laughed at her reply.

"Way to go, Mel." Kevin chuckled at his wife.

She smiled apologetically at Paul and Stephanie. "Sorry. I couldn't help myself."

They both grinned back at her before turning back round to face one another. Paul winked at Stephanie as his thumb traced her hand. "Now, where was I before I was so rudely interrupted?"

She smiled. "I think you were about to ask me a very important question."

"That's right. So I was." He grinned and exhaled slowly. The blood was beating in his ears as he stared into her wide blue eyes. "You know I fell in love with you the moment I saw you and I plan on loving you until the day I die. I want to share my life with you Steph. I can't imagine doing it without you." He smiled at her gently as his fingers slid through hers. "So, Stephanie Marie McMahon, will you marry me?"

A tear rolled down her cheek as she nodded her head. "Yes. Yes, I will." she whispered.

The people behind them clapped their hands as Paul took the ring in between his fingers, his hand lightly trembling as he slid the diamond solitaire on her finger. His hand cupped her face. "I love you." he whispered before brushing his lips against hers.

"Congratulations, man."

Paul looked up and smiled at Kevin who pulled him into a hug. "Thanks." He grinned as they broke apart. "I think it's time we celebrated both our good fortunes with a

drink."

"You took the words right out of my mouth." said Kevin as he looked over at his wife. She was huddled closed to Stephanie as they talked. "Excuse me ladies. We're going to join the guests and go inside. Will you be joining us?"

Melissa and Stephanie lifted their heads. Mel smiled at her husband. "You two go on ahead. We'll be there in a minute." She then took Stephanie's arm and led her away towards the trees.

Kevin looked at her curiously. "Okay." He turned to Paul and frowned. "Any idea what that is all about?"

Paul shook his head and smiled. "They're women, Kev. There's no point in even trying to figure it out. It's best to just leave them to it."

"Agreed." He patted Paul on the back as he guided him towards the hotel. "Come on Levesque. There's a drink in my bar with our names on it."

Melissa smiled at Stephanie as she watched the men disappear into the hotel. "Right, they're gone. Let's go."

Stephanie laughed as she followed her friend across the gardens. "This is crazy, Mel. You should be inside. It's your wedding reception."

"This will only take half an hour tops. No-one will even notice we're gone."

"It could always wait until another time, you know."

Melissa came to a halt as they got to the car park. "Don't you want to know if you're pregnant or not?"

"Of course I do."

"Well then. This is the only way." She led Stephanie towards the car which sat in front of the hotel. She opened the door and smiled at Max, the hotel chauffer. "We need you to make a quick trip. It won't take long."

She got in the back with Stephanie and smiling, she gave Max her instructions. "Do you know the pharmacy nearby?"

Max smiled. "Yes ma'am." He started up the car and pulled away from the hotel.

* * *

Kevin looked around the ball room. He couldn't see Melissa or Stephanie anywhere. He looked down at his daughter who he held in his arms. She was lying fast asleep. "It looks like your Mommy has disappeared on us."

As he looked up he saw Paul coming towards them.

"Any joy?"

"Nope. No-one has seen them since we came inside." He took a sip of his beer. "Try not to worry about it. They'll show up."

"You're awfully calm for someone whose fiancée has pulled a disappearing act right after he proposed to her."

Paul chuckled. "I know they'll be back at some point. There's no way Mel would leave Amy behind." He winked at Kevin. "I'm not so sure about you though."

"Gee thanks."

"You're welcome." Paul glanced over at the doorway and smiled. "Mystery over. Here comes Mel now."

Kevin turned round and smiled as his wife made her way towards them. "Hey, I was wondering where you got to."

Melissa smiled as she brushed back her daughter's hair. "Well you can stop wondering. I'm here now."

"Where have you been anyway?"

She laughed as she tapped his nose playfully. "It's none of your business." She looked over at Paul and smiled. "Steph's waiting for you up in your suite. She asked me to fetch you."

Paul snickered as he placed his bottle on the table. "That woman can't keep her damn hands off me."

Kevin snorted. "The meal is being served in fifteen minutes. I'm sure you'll make it back in plenty of time."

He pretended to laugh. "That's funny, Kev. Real funny."

"Seriously though, just make sure you're back down in time. Your duty as my best man is more important than some booty call."

Paul grinned and waved his hand in farewell as he left.

"Is Steph okay?" asked Kevin as he turned to his wife.

Melissa nodded her head and smiled as she rested her head on her husband's shoulder. "She's fine. She's absolutely fine."

* * *

Paul swiped his key and entered the room. He smiled as he saw her sitting on the sofa, her hands in her lap. "Hey."

Stephanie looked up and smiled. "Hey yourself."

"So, Mel summoned me." he said raking his fingers through his hair.

"I can see that."

"Is everything okay?"

Stephanie nodded. Her blue eyes twinkled as she patted the seat beside her. "Come and sit down."

Paul looked at her curiously as he took the seat beside her. She sat round, facing him, and took his hands in hers, clasping them tightly. Her engagement ring caught her eye and she smiled. "The ring is beautiful."

"I'm glad you like it." said Paul.

"I do. You have good taste, Levesque."

"Of course I do. I'm marrying you, aren't I?"

She laughed and as their eyes met, she lifted her right hand and cupped his face. Her thumb grazed his cheek softly. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"I'm going to be the luckiest woman in the world the day I become your wife."

"No. I'm the lucky one, Steph." Paul said tenderly as he turned his face and kissed her palm.

Smiling, she brought her head forward and rested it against his. "Your proposal was a wonderful surprise. Now it's my turn to surprise you."

Paul grinned. "Is this the part where you're going to strip naked?"

Stephanie chuckled. "No. It's better than that."

"Are you sure? Because, believe me, nothing is better to me than you without any clothes on."

"Paul, shut up. I'm trying to tell you something." she said, smiling.

"I'm sorry. Fire away."

Her fingers brushed through his soft hair. "I'm pregnant." she told him shyly.

She saw Paul's expression falter and his brown eyes went wide before he pulled away. He quickly bowed his head hiding his face behind his hair.

Stephanie bit her lip anxiously as she watched him, waiting for his response. Her stomach was in knots. She had honestly thought he would be happy about this. She thought a baby was what he wanted, what they wanted. After a moment had passed, she couldn't handle the silence any longer. Stephanie lifted his head up, forcing him to look at her. As their eyes met, she saw his unshed tears glistening in his deep brown orbs.

"Really?" he whispered.

She smiled, her own tears springing to her eyes. "Really."

"I'm going to be a daddy?" he asked softly.

She pressed her lips together, nodding her head.

Paul moved towards her and kissed her, his lips pressing gently against hers. As they broke apart, he kissed her cheek before wrapping his arms around her and pulling her tightly against him. He kissed her hair and rested his chin on her head, blinking back his happiness. "When did you find out?"

"Five minutes ago." Paul pulled away to look at her. She smiled at him. "That's where Mel and I disappeared to. I let it slip that I thought I might be pregnant. She made me go to the pharmacy and buy a pregnancy test. She never was the most patient person in the world."

He chuckled as he gently brushed her curls behind her ear. "I saw that earlier on when she interrupted my proposal."

Stephanie giggled as she took his hands in hers and her eyes searched his face. "But you are happy about the baby, aren't you? I mean, I know we didn't plan it or anything."

He gazed at her tenderly. "Steph, I'm over the moon. I really am." He smiled as he intertwined their fingers together. "Who'd have thought it? I find out I'm going to be a husband and a daddy all in one day."

"It's definitely a cause to celebrate."

"I'll say." He grinned at her mischievously. "Maybe we could start the celebrations right here." He kissed her softly. Within seconds his mouth trailed down towards her neck.

Stephanie swallowed thickly as her eyelids closed. His lips nipped and sucked at her skin. She was struggling not to give in to his touch. "I'm afraid we'll have to save this celebration for later. We really should get back downstairs." She opened her eyes and slowly began to pull away.

Paul sighed as he lifted his head. "You're no fun."

"We'll have plenty of time for our celebrations tonight." She smiled as she stood up, pulling him with her. She led him towards the door.

"You do know that the first dance is mine."

Stephanie smiled as she closed the door behind her. "Of course. I just hope that my feet can survive it."

"You're such a smartass." he said, affectionately.

"It's a trait I must have picked up from you."

"You couldn't have. I'm an angel."

"Sure you are." Stephanie replied, shaking her head.

Paul squeezed her hand as they walked along the corridor. "So, when can we ditch everyone else so I can get you all alone?"

She smiled. "We could probably sneak away in a few hours."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

Paul stopped outside the elevator doors and Stephanie smiled at him. As he looked into her eyes, his heart swelled with love. The woman standing in front of him meant everything to him. She was his entire world. "I really do love you, Steph."

Her smile softened as she wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in the crook of his neck. "And I love you too, Paul. Always."

The End!

If anyone found the proposal scene a little familiar, I may have borrowed the idea from elsewhere and sort of made it my own. It just wouldn't leave my head and insisted on being in my story. If you've read the book, you'll know what one I mean lol.


End file.
